Hot & Heavy Under the Stage Lights

REMUS

September 13th, 6:43 AM

Remus thought two things when walking into the studio doors:

1. It was way too early for this.
2.   Holy shit that guy was pretty.

Look, Remus has seen a lot of fit guys in his life, but that guy wasn’t just fit he was ethereal. Like hot guys usually are pretty muscular, tall, etc that kinda thing but pretty guys are an entire different ball game. Whoever this kid was he was pretty as fuck. Porcelain skin, raven curly hair shaped into a longer mullet and the most gorgeous pair of silver eyes Remus has ever scene in his life. 

Yes, it was barely past sunrise and he was only half-awake but he was pretty sure about this.

Prettyboy, and two other guys are sitting on a brown sofa. The tallest of the three smiles warmly at him and gestures for him to sit down.

“Quite early isn’t it?” The guy greets him and Remus immediately likes him. He’s not fake-nice like some people are upon meeting; he seems genuine and if there’s anything Remus learned from his mam, it’s hospitality. 

“Yeah, I’m not used to waking up before the sun but autumn sunrises are quite pretty so it was worth it, I guess.” Remus takes a look around before focusing back on the group. The studio is nice, not like the dingy one he’s used to back in his hometown.

“You’re Remus right? Nice to meet you, m’ name’s Pete.” A short blonde guy shakes his hand–Pete– and he also seems cool. Not stuck up or arrogant like a lot of famous people are. He seems alright.

Remus isn’t used to people like this, he’s got Lily but they’ve been friends since they could read so it’s not like he was starstruck in kindergarten. Lily’s actually the reason he’s here, they’ve both loved music for as long as they can remember and Lily started producing songs with her band only a year and a half ago but they’ve really taken off. Lily’s bandmate, Marlene, is friends with some guy named Sirius and they needed a bassist so Lily offered Remus up on a silver platter. Obviously he was grateful but being up at the crack of dawn as usual outweighed his gratitude.

“Yep, the one and only” He’d almost forgotten to respond to Pete’s question, lost in his pre-caffeine thoughts.

Prettyboy snorts and rolls his eyes. The first guy, gives him a warning look, well so much for none of them being arrogant.

“Pads” The first guy says. Huh, that’s a weird name. His parents must’ve had it out for him to name him something as odd as ‘Pads’. Maybe it’s a nickname, but what would that even be a nickname of? Paddle? No that’s an object… hmmm, Paddington? Well, that was all he could come up with so this guy will share the same name as a talking bear until he introduces himself. 

“I just don’t get why we need someone else, we were fine before Frank and we’ll be fine now, we don’t need someone to muck it all up” Paddington says and rolls his eyes looking away from his bandmates. 

The tan one ignores him and instead says, “Remus, have you brought something particular you’d like to play?” His smile is warm and his eyes are caring, he seems sorta like the Sun. Aha, Sunshineboy, that’s what he’ll call him. It’s kind of annoying that only Pete has introduced himself with a name but he actually likes these ones better than if they’d told him at the start of the conversation.

“Yeah, I just have a song with a basic beat” He pulls out the sheet of paper and swings his case off his shoulder. He opens the ebony case and pulls out a blue and light brown bass guitar.

“Okay cool, start whenever you’re ready, man” Sunshineboy’s focus turns back to Remus and Paddington still seems to be pouting. 

Remus takes a deep breath and starts to play. It’s one of his favorites because of his mam. She loved music, which makes sense because she was the one who taught him how to play. She probably would be thrilled to hear he was pursuing music but…

Shit . The music is ending so his thoughts have to as well. He looks up to Sunshineboy, Pete, and Paddington all sharing a look.

“Well, I owe Marlene £5.” Paddington grumbles from his seat on the sofa.

Pete rolls his eyes. “Welcome to the Marauders, mate.”

**********

BARTY

September 27 7:42 PM

It’s the day of the Valkyries album release and honestly he doesn't know why everyone’s making this such a big deal.

Okay, yes , he understands why it’s cool that they’re releasing their third album in two years but it’s just an album release. This doesn’t warrant Lily’s pale face starting to match the color of her hair or Marlene chewing her fingernails to the bone. Everyone needs to chill out. It’s not that deep.

There’s a slight buzz in his system but not enough to be drunk. 

The girls’ apartment is cozy, not in a small sense but in comfy kind of way. The white curtains on the windowsill are embroidered with all sorts of flowers and designs. 

Honestly he’s only here because Evan wanted to come. 

Fuck this honestly.

Evan is his best friend. Regulus is too, but it’s… different. Barty doesn’t feel like that around Regulus. Not to say that Regulus isn’t hot but…

It’s not even about looks, despite Barty wanting to play off his dilemma by pretending it’s just a shallow ‘I think he’s fit’ kind of crush, he knows deep down that’s not it. 

Dumb crushes don’t make Barty want to run his hands through their hair.

Dumb crushes don’t make Barty’s stomach dissolve.

Dumb crushes don't make Barty blush redder than a tomato.

All evidence point to the fact that Barty is now deeply, and wholly fucked.

Barty feels this unnerving desire to be gentle. He sees Evan and all he wants to do is hold . To just hold onto him because he can’t handle Evan leaving like everyone else. Barty has been described as violent and destructive, maybe that’s the part that comes from his father. He doesn’t care. He is loud and destructive and violent, but who cares? He spent so much time being told what he could and couldn’t do that it just doesn’t matter. So what if the hands holding him have blood on them? At least he’s being held. He’s being noticed and that’s enough, if it hurts on the way out then so be it.

He can’t handle hurting Evan. To see pieces of him shattered like the others before. A deep, selfish part of his mind thinks Do it anyway. You said you could be gentle so try it.

He can’t. 

Can’t or won’t?

As much as he wishes he could have him, he can’t. He won’t be selfish this time. Not to Evan. He can’t lose Evan.

He’ll watch from afar, and get as much of Evan as he can. 

He won’t be selfish, but that doesn’t mean he won’t savour every bit of him he can get.

*******

Marlene

September 27 

To say she was excited was the understatement of the century.

She loves music. She does and not in a ‘oh I love my job haha’ kind of way. 

Everything about music leaves her in awe.

Sounds cheesy, but it’s true. 

The vocals, the drums, soft melodic strums of guitars, bows dancing on violins, just everything.

She’s struggled to find a passion for a long time. Even music was hard for her to feel safe enough to love again. After her mom died it was rough, to say the least. She just completely shut down. It didn’t even occur to her that people could just… die. Unexpectedly, no warning signs, just gone. Obviously, when you’re six you’re not thinking about your parents' days being numbered. She wasn’t alone, not really, just lonely. Marlene has six brothers, older and younger. 

 Michael–Mikey– 27, The eldest and a now police officer who just got engaged.

Christopher–Chris–  25, An electrician and self- proclaimed “Cat Dad” (Marlene thinks this is ridiculous by the way)

Thomas–Tommy– 22, One of Marlene’s closest brothers who’s graduating college to become an engineer. 

Marlene was born after Tommy, she’s going to be twenty-one now come June 16th.

Then comes the twins, Finn and Will who will turn seventeen in November, Finn working at the aquarium and Will working to get an art scholarship for university applications.

The youngest Nathan– Nate– just turned 15 in July. He was not even two when their mum died so he doesn’t even remember her despite looking almost exactly like her. Same hair, eyes, and nose.

And then obviously, there’s her dad. Who’s great, by the way, he really tries for all his kids but it’s a lot– seven kids, a full time job and being a single parent. Difficult is an understatement. They all help out, Mikey and Chris especially. 

Marlene tries to help out with money as much as possible, she’s very grateful for her fame and that she can live comfortably. A lot of people think she’s cocky or obnoxious, which she can be at times, but she’s just sure of herself. She’s confident in who she is and doesn’t need to hide behind some fake idea that all women should be insecure and fragile. 

Things are good. Really good.

For the first time in Marlene’s life she’s… happy.

Not to say she was unhappy or depressed before, it’s just she can’t remember a time where she was happy about everything; her friends, her appearance, her career, her family, her friends.

All of it is just…

There isn’t a word to describe it really.

Good feels repetitive and not sufficient and perfect feels like she’s taunting the universe to mess up her life.

Yeah, no thank you. 

She’s struggled a lot with embracing who she is. Growing up as a girl without a mom and being surrounded by boys was a little tough, to be honest. As a kid she just felt so out of place. Like she wasn’t enough of one thing or another. She wasn’t boyish enough like her brothers (even if she said she was), she wasn’t girly like her classmates which was fine but… lonely.

While the girls were off whispering about boys they liked, Marlene was in the corner with kickball playing two-touch by herself. Obviously she found friends as she grew older, Mary and Lily as proof of that. She also found her best friend– Sirius– through the music industry. They act like siblings and he’s just like another brother to Marlene and she’s like the sister he lost. Marlene won’t tell you about that, it’s Sirius’ story to tell. 

Wherever Sirius goes, James does too. All six feet and one inch of him is full of love and kindness. He’s compassionate, empathetic, selfless, energetic, really just a good person. He’s not perfect, mind you, he can be rash and egotistical at times but he’s a good person. 

She hopes whoever ends up with him treats him right. 

Speaking of people ending up together this leads to her current dilemma. Dorcas.

Dorcas hates her. This is a problem for three reasons...

• Dorcas is really pretty and makes Marlene turn to goo once she looks her way.

• Marlene doesn’t do well with people disliking her so she’ll react and then it’ll make Dorcas hate her more.

• Lily asked Marlene to try and be friends with these people and she’s making it really hard, which is going to piss off Lily and that’s… not good.

Dorcas is very headstrong and competitive, which are admirable qualities (to Marlene at least) and she did not warm up to Marlene very well, or like at all.

Dorcas did not like Marlene.

Did you notice that ' did' , yeah, Marlene has moved up to Tolerated Status now.

Pretty cool, right?

Yeah, she knows, not as impressive when she’s retelling then it was in her head, nevermind.

As much as Marlene would love to speed this along and snog Dorcas’ mind out– she can’t.

Not until they can hold a solid conversation without insults.

She’s got a lot of work ahead of her but she’s in for the long run.

Dorcas doesn’t know it yet but Marlene is already planning their first date.

********

Regulus 

September 28 12:17 AM

The party is winding down and the music was shut off a couple hours ago. 

Barty and Evan decided to break out Uno and all hell broke loose. 

“Hello?! Are you stupid? You can’t stack a +2 on a +4 that’s illegal!” Barty’s face is red and his pupils are blown, likely from the yelling.

“Yes, you can you fucking dumbass!” Dorcas waves her cards around while yelling back and Regulus swears he sees Marlene blush in the corner of his eye.

“Read the fucking rule book you twat” Barty, then proceeds to throw the rule book in Dorcas’ face (not a wise move on his part).

“Oh that’s fucking it, you are so lucky this is a cards game because the board would be so flipped right now!” Dorcas gets up from her spot on the carpet and marches right over to Barty and slaps him right on the back of the head.

Unfortunately for a situation this comical, it’s very dangerous to laugh– Marlene, it seems, was not aware of this.

Marlene lets out a soft chuckle. 

No one breathes or moves.

“You got something to add, Mckinnon?” Dorcas’ gaze shifts to Marlene. 

Big mistake. Uno means war in this household (it’s not even their house but still) and Barty and Dorcas are usually the main two opponents.

“No! Nonono, I was laughing at Barty not you!” Marlene’s face mirrors the expression Barty had only moments ago.

“Fine, whatever. Uno is done, all of you are idiots and I’m going to the bathroom.” Dorcas grumbles, grabs her phone, and shuffles to the bathroom.

“Bye Cassieeeeeee!” Barty bats his eyelashes

The door slams.

“Well, that was fun.” Lily clears her and Mary’s bowls from their ice cream and rolls her eyes.

“Aw, no that’s just how she is, trust me. Besides, it’s past midnight and being around Dorcas and Barty for this long will make anyone insane.” Barty shoves Evan at his slight jab and Evan rolls his eyes.

“So then we’re probably heading out.” Regulus speaks up for the first time in a while 

“Okay, cool; thanks for coming, by the way, I know it was a bit anticlimactic but it was nice seeing you guys again” Mary goes in to hug Pandora and then ruffle Regulus’ hair (hugs aren’t on the table for them right now).

Eventually they say their goodbyes and leave with Dorcas and Barty in the back of the car, arguing over how Uno is played.

The car ride back is short and uneventful. Barty and Dorcas still bickered but that was the only sound besides the quiet hum of the air conditioning. 

Evan unlocks the door and Regulus is the first to step inside. 

He goes straight to his room and shuts his door.

He goes to the edge of his bed and pulls out his box. It’s a yellow box with crimson ribbon  tied around it but it’s not the box that’s important, it’s the contents inside.

He carefully lifts the lid and inside are letters.

He doesn’t know how many there are, maybe twenty-five? Well, it’s less than forty but more than fifteen. 

All of them are addressed to the same person. 

Sirius.

His brother.

Every time something “big” happens he pulls out a clean sheet of paper and starts a letter.

He’s written many over the last five years and it used to be a way to catch him up when Sirius would eventually come back to get him.

Sirius never came back.

He doesn’t believe he will anymore, there’d be no point anyway, Regulus is out. He’s done.

He honestly doesn’t know why he still does it, maybe it’s the force of habit, maybe he just misses his brother, okay?

He will not be admitting to which is true.

He’s been writing them ever since he left .

Nobody else knows. He’s not ashamed of it, alright? It’s just… personal. Nobody else besides him will ever get the chance to read these letters, not even the intended recipient.

He hasn’t written one in a while, not since the tour started and he doesn’t have a solid reason to anyway— that doesn’t stop him from pulling out a sheet of paper, his green pen, and an envelope.

Sirius,

Hey it’s been awhile, not a lot’s happened but I felt like talking— or writing I guess, today. 

I started tour, but I guess I already told you about that. I just got back from Lily’s place. Her, Mary and Marlene just released their album tonight but you’ve probably already heard all about this from Marlene so I won’t go into too much detail.

I’ve been thinking of going to see Bella. Remember when I told you how she’s been in rehab for a few months? I don’t want to bring up bad memories or anything but I think it’ll be good to see her again. 

Right?

Well you can’t respond so I might as well just give up that approach. She’s been diagnosed with Anorexia and I think she should have someone from our family who’s not an abusive asshole with her. At least for a bit, you know?

Well despite what you say, I’m going tomorrow. Cissa’s been really worried about her so maybe I’ll go with her. Have a big sisters reunion, well except for Andy. 

How is Andy by the way? I know you’re in contact with her, I’ve seen you talk all about her in your interviews. Cissa misses her. I do too.

I miss you. You won’t ever read this but I think it’s good for the universe to know, maybe you’ll feel it I don’t know. I’m not an expert in the universe’s ways, that’s Dora’s job.

Your brother, 

Regulus 

Regulus folds up the letter and slides it into the envelope, he seals it, addresses it and puts it into the box.

That letter will never be read but it brings Regulus comfort anyway.

He sighs, turns off his lamp and makes his way to his bed.

That night, he dreams of his brother.