Might as Well
Sirius’ eyes widened. He’d expected a response, but not one like that.
Regulus sounded so… defeated.
“Are you alright?” he ventured, and Regulus only stared at him. “What’s wrong?” he tried, taking slow, hesitant steps towards him and gingerly reaching out a hand.
“Nothing,” deflected Regulus, turning his gaze downwards.
“Reg…” He placed a hand softly on Regulus’ arm. Regulus looked up and met his eye. There was something sad in his gaze.
Regulus let out a breath through his nose, biting his downturned lip, and suddenly wrapped his arms around his brother. It took Sirius a second to process what had happened, but then he was clutching Regulus tightly as well. “Reg…” he repeated, holding him close. Regulus had buried his face into Sirius’ shoulder, but Sirius could tell he wasn’t crying.
“I missed you,” whispered Regulus quietly. So quiet, that Sirius almost didn’t hear it. He held Regulus tighter.
“I missed you too,” he whispered back.
“I’m sorry about… about everything I said,” Regulus continued, “I don’t want to fight anymore.”
Sirius could barely believe his ears.
“Me neither,” he smiled warmly.
“Ok,” said Regulus, loosening his hold as he began to draw back.
“Ok,” agreed Sirius. And that was that. They were brothers once more.
***
Over the next few weeks, things slowly returned to how they had been the year before. Sirius said hello to Regulus in the hallway as Barty Crouch Jr made faces at him. Regulus would come and stop by their table every now and then, often to say something to James, strangely enough (though Sirius was probably the only one who knew what it was that Regulus felt for James - what he had felt for their past years at school). Sirius didn’t know what it had been that had made Regulus so upset the night they’d made up, but maybe, in time, Regulus would tell him. He hoped so.
September turned into October and pretty soon it was Halloween. Which meant, of course, that it was time for the annual Gryffindor Halloween party (the second Gryffindor party of the season), which in turn meant, of course, that Sirius had to come up with a costume.
It was quite the task, and involved lots of brainstorming and changes of heart. He’d taken to discussing it to whoever would listen (and even those who wouldn’t). At present, he was talking to the Gryffindor Common Room at large (which currently possessed Lily, James, Peter, Mary and some first years playing exploding snap).
“I still think you should go as a dog,” James was telling him, “You know, a big, black, dog?”
Sirius groaned from where he was lounging on the sofa.
“That’s a terrible costume,” Mary chimed in as she continued to leisurely paint her nails a fantastic red.
Sirius rolled over and stared up at the ceiling.
“Oh!” he said excitedly, “I could be a muggle!”
“No!” said Mary and Lily in unison.
“What?” he asked.
“ ‘A muggle’ isn’t a costume, Black,” Lily reprimanded.
“At least go as a specific muggle,” added Mary, who was now fanning her hands as she waited for the nail varnish to dry. “Want me to do yours, Lils?” she suggested, gesturing to Lily’s plain nails.
“Yes please,” replied Lily politely, and Mary made her way over.
“I don’t know any specific muggles,” complained Sirius.
“What about all those records you listen to?” countered Mary impatiently. Sirius could tell she’d had enough of his deliberations.
“Oh!” he exclaimed excitedly as he thought of all the muggles he knew about, and then, “But I don’t really know what they look like.”
“Just dress up as what’s on the album cover,” suggested Pete.
“I don’t know…” mused Sirius, “Isn’t Remus already going as David Bowie? There’s no one else really cool left.”
“Oh, stuff it, Black!” Mary told him, pausing from her careful painting of Lily’s nails to glower at him, “Will you figure it out already? I think we’ve all had enough. You can show up as a troll for all I care!”
“Mary…” said Lily softly, and Mary returned to her nails with an angry huff.
“Hang on a second!” he replied, “You’ve just given me an idea - I’ve got it!”
“You have?” said James.
“Yes,” announced Sirius triumphantly, standing up on the sofa with a grin.
“Are you going as a troll?” asked Pete disbelievingly.
“Of course not!” Sirius retorted.
“Well?” prompted Mary impatiently.
“I can’t tell you,” laughed Sirius.
“You can’t?” she asked dryly.
“It would ruin the surprise!”
“What surprise?” asked Remus as he stepped through the portrait hole. Sirius grinned even more at the sight of him.
“His Halloween costume,” supplied Pete.
“Oh?” said Remus, making his way over to the sofa.
“Yes,” breathed Sirius, “It’s top secret.”
“You’ll tell me, won’t you?” teased Remus. Sirius pretended to deliberate.
“Yes,” he confessed, and he didn’t need to turn around to know that Mary was rolling her eyes at the two of them. Remus kissed him, and Sirius smiled into it.
“My eyes!” complained James as Pete groaned loudly. Lily laughed at the two of them.
“Just take your glasses off,” Sirius suggested, pulling Remus in for another kiss.
“Oh, get a room,” said Mary irritably.
“Yeah,” agreed Pete, “Preferably one that isn’t our dorm.”
Sirius flipped him off as he got down from the sofa and took Moony by the hand.
“No promises,” he winked as he led them up the stairs.
“Sirius,” chuckled Moony. James wolf-whistled after them, and Remus went red as Lily’s new nails.
“So?” prompted Moony conspiratorially once they were in the dorm, “What’s your costume?”
“I’m going to be a vampire.”
***
“So you’ll be there?” asked Sirius, trying to keep his tone neutral.
“Yes,” droned Regulus, “I’m going.”
“Will you dance?” he pressed. Regulus shot him a look.
“Maybe,” he returned.
“Maybe we can dance together,” Sirius suggested.
“No.”
“Fine. What are you going as?”
“You’ll see,” was all Regulus said, and that was the extent of their talk about the party. He hadn’t even asked what Sirius would be wearing (not that he would have told Regulus if he had).
When Halloween finally came around, however, nobody got to see much of Sirius’ all-black ensemble and illusioned fangs. Halloween was verging on the full moon that year, and Remus was…. different, whenever his transformation was coming up.
His senses were heightened; he could hear and smell and feel everything, so parties were sometimes a bit much. He was ravenous; he would eat three times his normal portions. Sometimes he was irritable. Sometimes he couldn’t sleep. And now that they were more than friends, Sirius was beginning to discover that sometimes he was… well, different.
Things had been alright at first; Sirius was a vampire, James was a deer, Peter was a half-hearted rat and Remus was David Bowie, with the electric red and blue lightning bolt across his face (painted by Sirius of course). Remus had hung back a bit, getting a quiet drink with Pete and then Lily, while Sirius made his rounds and said hello to all his friends.
And some of those friends, Sirius couldn’t blame them when they didn’t know about Remus and him, but they were touchy. Their hands skirted over his lower back or they kissed his cheek or they held his arm. They were just being friendly, really.
Sirius Black had been on the market ever since he broke up with Mary. Usually he was touchy right back, but they just hadn’t caught on yet.
Soon, Remus was walking over to put his arm around Sirius instead and finding reasons to whisk him away.
“What’s wrong?” asked Sirius as he got himself a drink with Remus at the corner of the room. Remus leaned in, eyes gleaming, and spoke next to his ear.
“I can smell them all over you,” he hissed. Sirius felt a thrill run down his spine as his eyes widened.
“You can?” he faltered. Remus nodded. Sirius took a gulp of his drink, staring straight ahead. He turned to Remus, who was still leaning in. “Do you… Do you want to go upstairs?”
Remus pressed a kiss to his neck that made Sirius’ nerves flutter.
“God yes,” he muttered, and so they climbed the stairs and did not return for the rest of the night.