Chapter 1
Severus Snape. Many know Severus Snape, And not exactly for good reasons.
So what comes in your mind when you think of Severus Snape?
A future Deatheater, A disgusting Slytherin, A greasy git, An ugly nobody, A half blood, A whore, Waste of space, Disgrace, Annoying, Nerd, Rude, Hated, Snarky, Bitchy, Poor, Slimy, Trash, Or something else?
In his graceful Fifth year at hogwards, Summer vacations. Snape was at home. His poor mother working away, Selling her body to feed Severus and her good for nothing husband and snapes father, Tobias Snape. Oh how Severus despised that man..
Today was a Monday, And Tobias had finally got a job after the bills piled up. So Snape was alone at home, And He had a sudden thought. Snape stood up, and looked in the broken mirror in the corner of his room for a second. He was extremely ugly.
Greasy shoulder length hair, Ghostly pale skin, Long hooked nose, Skinny because of poverty, And dirty. No wonder he had never gotten laid, He was indeed a slimy nobody who deserved to die, Perhaps.
Severus slowly walked down the stairs and into the small and dirty kitchen, Looking at the counter, He took the dirty, Rusty metal knife from it and ran his fingers up and down on the knife.
Perhaps this was his calling, Just die Snape. Why do you continue to torment everyone around you? If Snape died, There would be less mouths to feed, no Hogwards fees to pay, The students at hogwards finally free from a burden and The marauders have no one in their way to glory. Life would get better for everyone, And Snape would be free from his torment.
And so decided Snape, He would die. But not from this knife, Snape thought. That would look like murder. So he decided to get some rope from the floor, Which Tobias left lying around carelessly.
Snape made his way upstairs and into his small and dusty room, got a chair, And tied the rope to the fan, And then his neck. Snape then kicked the chair off, And let himself be strangled to death.
His life flashed before his eyes, All the times the marauders bullied him, The time lily and him stopped being friends because He called lily a mudblood, Lucius praising the dark lord to him, Severus getting threatened by Dumbledore to keep his mouths hut about Remus' true identity, The time he was rejected by lily and so many others, Playing chess with Mulciber and Avery, Doing others homework, Getting beat up by Tobias...He saw it all, In barely a minute.
And then he was out cold, Free from this torment. Free to die and go to heaven, Or perhaps hell. Snape hoped his mother would be free from Tobias in his last seconds,Though he knew that was a stupid and fruitless wish. That would never happen. Not even in Severus' wildest imagination.
And so, Stopped breathing the slimy, Ugly git. Severus Snape.
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Severus woke up with a jolt, His entire body hurt. Badly. He winced, He couldn't even stand up straight— wait a minute. Woke up? Didn't Severus suicide? Didn't he die? Did Eileen find him and take him to the hospital? God please no..Tobias would be livid, The hospital bills were more than they could Handle.
Severus suddenly felt pain crash upon him, And he screamed. His eyes started flickering around his surroundings. No..This didn't look like a hospital. An empty white space, In which Severus was on a empty pure white bed. Severus' clothes were the same, So he hadn't gone to heaven. Or hell. Had Severus just been send to the void? Was he that bad in life? Well, Severus certainly didn't know it was that bad.
Snape was now sure that he was dead, His skin felt airy and he could pass his hands through himself. Just as he was contemplating life decisions and wether suicide was such a good option after all, Someone— Or rather something, Popped Infront of him. It had angelic wings, Three on each side and one on each side of his head. Long silky white hair, golden eyes, Soft smile, Pale skin and pure white and golden clothes. What in the biblically accurate angel?
Then, Out of nowhere, Popped up a bloody bat— A..Demon thingy? It was the total opposite of the biblically accurate angel, And had messy dark black hair that resembled bloody James potter.. It's eyes were a bloodshot red, And skin was slightly tanned. He had two long demon horns, And demon wings too. Except only one at each side, Unlike the bloody angel.
"Ok, Where are the cameras? Sick joke guys. Is this magic? What kind of spell is this? Stop it." Severus sighed, This had to be a joke. The angel and demon duo just looked at him as if Severus told them the earth was flat.
"...cameras?—" the angel questioned in a pretty voice, Looking confused as hell.
The demon on the other hand, cackled like a damn witch, (No offense to all the witches out there, Severus himself was a wizard.) and rubbed it's rough hands together.
"Hahahaha!!! My dear human, You have ruined everything!' the demon began, Suddenly scowling at the end of his sentence. The thing sounded like a bloody punk rockstar vocaloid or something. Severus felt like crying, Where the hell was he stuck? Why him, of all people?
"Nu uh! Shut up! I'll explain!" The angel pushed the demon away, Flapping it's wings Infront of Severus now. The demon only rolled his eyes in response.
"Well, You..Suicided. before your life ended. That's..not allowed. And we will have to—" Before the e angel could finish Severus nearly screamed, Jolting up to stand despite the pain.
"NO. I'M NOT GOING BACK THERE!"
"—make you relive life.." the angel finished, concerned. The demon only cackled again. Ohm that was even worse, living in that hellhole again.
Seemingly reading his thoughts, The angel reassured him, smiling softly. This bloody twat— "Don't worry, Mortal! You'll be in another timeline, Where everything is sooooo good, And you'll have us to protect you!"
The demon, Now proud, nodded his head with an evil smile. Severus didn't even have the chance to say no as the Bloody Demon took his head and started snapping his neck into a million impossible poses.
"S-STOP!!" cried out the angel, But the demon simply kept going.
"YOUR DOING IT WRONG! YOUR DOING IT WRONG! I-ILL DO IT! PLEASEEEE!!!!" the angel pleaded, Pulling the demons horns and yanking him away. The demon huffed, But let the angel continue.
"A-as I was saying..." The angel started, Composing itself. "You'll be reliving life in a good way, as in a good life. Kind of like a reincarnation, You have all your past memories and all..Well, But there's a catch. You'll do something for us."
"Yeah! And we won't tell you what! HAHAHHAHAHA!!!!" the demon was cackling endlessly, Jumping around like a gremlin who ate too much sugar.
"One way to phrase it.. You'll find out yourself. Just— just don't worry, close your eyes and I shall get this done with!" The angel shot s look at the demon, Who stopped his activities and looked at Severus like a kicked puppy.
"Hmph...Hurry it up, You White Rat!" The angel scowled at the demons words, But began with whatever he was about to do anyways.
Severus had no say in this, They just told him stuff, and he listened. What the hell? Severus was never going to suicide again, That was for sure.. apparently there's a time he needs to do it..As if he'll ever know what time to do so!
Severus was scowling hard, About to say something when the angel started chanting something loudly and the demons started doing flips in the white space that Severus called the void, Seemingly unbothered.
Severus was getting concerned, Was this a warning or something? Warning to join their cult? Was he high on drugs? Most definitely, Thought Severus. Maybe he did some drugs before passing out and this was him in the hospital, Hallucinating while Tobias got ready to beat him and Eileen up.
A blinding white ray took over as the angel stopped talking and chanting, And everything seemed distinct. The demons cackling was barely audible, Like he was listening to it from a distant, Or viewing an old memory. And he felt drowsy.
And so, Severus succumbed to whatever drugs he was high on.
The drugs won or something, Because Severus still refused to believe the angel and demon were real. Bloody stupid, It was.
This, Is the start of a new and improved life for Severus Snape, But who can say about the others? Read on if you dare, My friend. Find out.