Chapter 5
Regulus would much rather sleep through the day of the integration reception. He knows that meeting with his friends is as inevitable as the conversation with Pandora, whose arrival is scheduled for the morning of the day when the party for all the wedding guests is to take place. James, however, doesn’t let him pretend to disappear, which is probably the more reasonable approach. There’s already enough tension and unresolved matters for his family to start suspecting something.
Now he’s standing on the stairs leading to the garden, watching as Pandora gracefully steps out of the car. She looks impeccable as always — her hair perfectly styled, a gentle smile on her lips. But there’s something more in her gaze. He recognizes it immediately. Worry. Maybe even guilt.
Pandora doesn’t wait a moment. As soon as she spots Regulus standing at the top of the stairs, she rushes toward him. Her usually graceful steps are now hurried, almost chaotic. She nearly trips over her long white dress, but even that doesn’t stop her. Regulus doesn’t have time to open his mouth before her arms wrap around him.
“Reg,” she whispers, her voice carrying relief, concern, and perhaps even a touch of regret. He doesn’t react immediately but, after a moment, slowly returns the embrace. Pandora has always had a way of making it hard to stay angry at her.
“Hi,” he whispers into her hair.
“I didn’t know, Regulus,” she says, pulling back slightly to look at his face. Her eyes shimmer with emotion. “Evan only just told me. Dorcas made him.” Regulus raises an eyebrow, but there’s no anger in his gaze. Instead, there’s exhaustion and perhaps a hint of relief that he doesn’t have to struggle with the decision of whether to tell his friend or respect Evan’s request, who, despite everything, still matters to him.
“When?” he asks quietly.
“Last night. I had no idea before. And… I’m furious, Reg. At him. At both of them. How could they think this was a good idea?” Her voice cracks at the end, but she quickly swallows her emotions. “You’re their friend. I’m… I’m his sister. How could they keep this from us?” Regulus shakes his head, struggling to suppress a smile at the sight of her fury. Pandora is the only person who always fights for him with the same determination she fights for herself.
“It was about me and my relationship with Barty,” he shrugs, but his voice is filled with bitterness. “A weak excuse, I know.”
Pandora sighs heavily and then gently squeezes his arm.
“Whatever they thought, they had no right to hurt you. Not like this.” Regulus looks at her for a moment before lowering his gaze. “Evan is such an idiot. I can’t believe he didn’t realize that talking and being honest was the best choice.”
“I don’t know if I can forgive them just like that,” he admits, his voice barely audible. The sense of betrayal eats at him, burning a hole that nothing can fill. He hasn’t been able to think about anything else since finding out that Evan and Barty had arrived in Como.
Pandora looks at him with a pain she clearly understands. She gently touches his hand, as if to remind him he’s not alone in this.
“And you don’t have to,” she says calmly, though her tone carries a hint of firmness. “Forgiveness doesn’t come easily. They should understand that.”
Regulus clenches his jaw, staring at a spot on the ground to avoid her gaze.
“But if I don’t forgive them, then what? Do I cut them out of my life?” he asks bitterly. “I’m scared, Pandora. I’m scared that I’ll never trust them again.”
Pandora squeezes his hand tighter.
“You know what Dorcas said when Evan finally said it to me? That love shouldn’t be a secret. Not from the people who matter to us. Maybe they made a mistake, but that doesn’t mean they’ve lost the right to be your friends.”
Regulus finally raises his eyes to meet hers.
“And what if they have? What if they’ve lost it? What if I don’t want to be their friend anymore?”
Pandora doesn’t respond immediately. She bites her lip as though weighing every word.
“That’s your right too. But Reg…” Her voice softens. “Don’t make that decision out of anger. Give yourself time before you decide whether to cut them off or try to understand them.”
Regulus remains silent, his fingers trembling slightly despite his efforts to hide it. Pandora pulls him into a tight hug, the way she used to when they were children.
“Whatever you decide, I’m on your side, Regulus. Always.”
Her words are simple, but they make the weight on his chest feel just a little lighter. Though he doesn’t yet know how his conversation with Evan and Barty will go, he at least knows he has someone who will stand by him. Pandora has always had a way of saying things that calmed him.
“Thank you,” he whispers, barely audibly, his voice trembling slightly. Pandora smiles softly, her gaze warm and reassuring.
“There’s nothing to thank me for,” she replies simply, though her tone conveys more than anyone else’s words ever could. For a moment, silence stretches between them, broken only by the sound of crickets. Pandora steps back, straightens up, and puts her hands on her hips, trying to lighten the mood.
“Later, you’ll have to tell me how James is doing as your fake boyfriend,” she says, lowering her voice and smiling mischievously.
Regulus rolls his eyes, though the corners of his mouth twitch slightly. Before he can reply, he notices movement in the distance. Lily and James are walking toward them, engaged in a lively conversation. James seems animated, gesturing with his hands, while Lily looks at him with an amused smile.
Those two are a living example that it’s possible to maintain normal, healthy relationships after a breakup. Regulus has never doubted Lily’s sincerity toward his friend and, in truth, she’s the first of Pandora’s girlfriends he has no complaints about. He doesn’t find anything inappropriate in Evans and Potter’s relationship. After all, they were friends long before they started dating. Just like he and Barty…
Regulus feels a familiar pang in his chest. The thought of how naturally Lily and James talk to each other stirs unwanted memories. They seem unaffected by the past, casually joking and chatting as if there had never been anything difficult between them. And yet their relationship ended. Despite that, they’ve found balance.
It contrasts starkly with how he feels about Evan and Barty. Everything with them feels complicated now, tangled in resentment and anger. Memories of the times they spent together, when their friendship was everything, now feel almost like a cruel joke.
“Just like he and Barty…”—the thought echoes back, unbidden and painful. Regulus stares at the ground, as if trying to cut himself off from the surge of emotions, but it’s no use. The betrayal hurts not just because they hid their relationship from him. It’s because he loved them — both of them, though in slightly different ways — and it never occurred to him that they would exclude him from such an important part of their lives.
Pandora, as if sensing the shift in his mood, gently touches his shoulder.
“Reg, are you okay?” she asks softly, her voice full of concern. Regulus sighs and straightens up, as if trying to push down what’s weighing on him.
“Yeah, I just… I’m wondering how it was so easy for them. James and Lily,” he adds, nodding toward the approaching pair. Pandora glances at them, then back at Regulus.
“You know, it didn’t happen right away. Lily told me how long it took them to work on building something that works now. I think it’s about both of them wanting it. Knowing what’s important to them.”
Regulus doesn’t respond, just watches James, who now bursts out laughing at something Lily said. Pandora is right. Relationships take effort, but in his case, it feels almost impossible right now. How can he talk to Evan and Barty when he feels like he doesn’t even know who he is to them anymore?
Before he can spiral into another wave of thoughts, James and Lily reach them.
“Regulus! Pandora!” James waves enthusiastically, as if seeing them is the best thing that could happen to him that day. “What are you two talking about?”
Regulus exchanges a glance with Pandora and then just shakes his head.
“About what it’s like to put up with your presence for so many days,” he says with a hint of sarcasm, though there’s also something warmer in his tone. James pretends to be offended, but his eyes sparkle with amusement.
“Admit it, you’ll find it so hard to go back to normal life without me,” he quips, and Pandora bursts out laughing.
It’s brief, but Regulus feels the weight on his chest lighten slightly. Even if he doesn’t know how he’ll handle things with Evan and Barty, at least he knows he has people who support him.
Pandora, Sirius, Lily, Remus, and even James, who is very slowly starting to break through Regulus’s prejudices against him. These are the people who, to varying degrees, have managed to breach his walls. In the past, he would never have allowed himself to feel this sense of security brought on solely by someone’s presence. He would never have let this warmth melt away his cynicism. But now is not the past, and he has learned that some people are worth trusting and opening up to.
xxx
He decides on a black shirt and trousers in the same color. It’s a classic choice—elegant and unpretentious, exactly what he believes is appropriate for a gathering where the most judgmental part of his family will be present. Aunts, uncles, and cousins who can measure a person’s worth with a single glance, analyzing every detail — from the cut of the clothes to the way they hold a glass.
Black is safe. Universal. It fits every mood, but most importantly, it suits the distance Regulus plans to maintain. He doesn’t want to draw attention to himself. It’s enough that James will be accompanying him, and their “relationship” will surely become a topic for gossip.
He adjusts the cuffs of his shirt, feeling the weight of his reflection in the mirror. Everything looks perfect — at least on the outside.
But inside?
Chaos. The unbearable tension at the thought of meeting Evan and Barty, of the family’s scrutinizing gazes, trying to figure him out. Of everything he’ll have to endure with apparent grace, even though he’d rather disappear.
As he leaves the bathroom, he encounters James in the room. Potter, dressed in a dark gray suit with his collar casually unbuttoned, looks like he just stepped out of an advertisement.
“Someone looks like they’re about to steal the show tonight,” James raises an eyebrow, his gaze sweeping over Regulus.
“It’s just a black shirt, don’t exaggerate,” Regulus replies, trying to sound dismissive, but he can feel the warmth creeping up his neck. James smiles, seeing his reaction.
“Hmmm… Or maybe you’re trying to catch someone’s eye in particular?” James raises an eyebrow, and Regulus feels his breath catch for a moment. “Like Kingsley’s?”
“Kingsley? He’s already with someone. I’m… oh,” he cuts himself off suddenly, his confusion giving way to a smile. “I can’t believe it… You’re jealous.”
“What? No! Of course not. You’re funny. Why would I be jealous?” Black laughs softly, because that reaction only confirms his words. “I’m just worried about you, because I don’t want you getting hurt by accident.”
Regulus feels something freeze for a moment in his chest. Although he doesn’t want to admit it, something in him starts to blossom, resembling satisfaction. He feels a strange contentment that James cares about his feelings and who surrounds him.
“You don’t need to worry. I haven’t felt anything for him in a long time. He just wanted to talk and clear things up so we wouldn’t feel weird,” he sees no reason to keep his conversation with his ex a secret from James. He partly brought him here to avoid feeling strange about his ex’s new relationship. He realizes this need to prove something is unhealthy, but he can’t stop himself.
He looks at James, who remains silent, though it’s clear he’s not entirely convinced. Maybe it’s the uncertainty in his eyes, or maybe James just can’t hide that he’s jealous.
“You know I don’t need to prove anything, right?” Regulus adds, trying to soften the tone of the conversation, though it’s a little hard. James turns to him, briefly considering his words. Then he sighs, raising his hands in a gesture of surrender.
“You don’t, Reg. But… I just worry. I don’t know if we’re friends yet, but you’re someone I care about, and that’s enough for me to want you to feel alright.”
Regulus feels his heart race for a moment. Maybe it’s anger, maybe nervousness, but he feels something else too — something that worries him. He feels a growing need to protect this space of his, the boundary he’s set between the past and the present. James is here to pretend to be his boyfriend, not to confront him with old feelings.
“It’s not a big deal, James,” he responds quietly, more to himself than to him, before looking him in the eye. “I just don’t need all of this coming back. I’ve moved past it.”
James watches him for a moment, as if analyzing something. After a moment, he reaches his hand out, as if to say something that would make Regulus feel better, but in the end, he pulls it back.
“Alright,” he finally says, though his tone suggests otherwise. “You don’t have to explain anything. But if you ever want to talk, you know where to find me.”
Regulus remains silent, letting James’s words hang in the air for a moment. Something softens in him — maybe it’s understanding, or maybe it’s simply the feeling that someone is truly listening. But he doesn’t get a chance to say anything, because James hurriedly grabs his phone and keys from the table, then opens the door and motions toward the hallway.
“We should go. Your aunt will be mad if we’re too late.”
Regulus nods, feeling how the entire conversation, though not exactly finished, fades into the air, leaving behind a slight tension. James seems to want to move on to the next thing, not wanting to leave them both in an uncomfortable silence.
He looks at the door that James has already opened, and for a moment wonders if he should say something more. But his mind can’t focus on anything other than what he feels — a mix of relief, anger, and confusion, something he doesn’t quite know what to do with.
“You’re right,” he finally says quietly, though the words sound more like a reminder to himself than a response to James’s suggestion.
They both head into the hallway. Regulus notices that James seems less tense than he was a moment ago, as if the whole Kingsley conversation hadn’t affected him at all. But maybe he’s just pretending? Regulus doesn’t feel like asking. He senses that this isn’t the moment for such talks.
As they close the door behind them, he feels the evening’s chill creep in through the windows, and the warm glow of the street lamps can no longer mask the shift in mood. He stops for a moment, looking at James, who walks ahead, convinced that what he said is enough.
Regulus wonders whether what he feels for James is something that could be called trust, or if it’s just another swirl in the ocean of emotions he’ll soon have to figure out.
“It’s time for the party. Just what I need,” he mutters sarcastically under his breath, following James, completely unprepared for what’s to come.
xxx
The garden where the party is taking place makes an impression from the first glance. It stretches over a large area, surrounded by neatly trimmed hedges with remarkable precision. At the center is a marble fountain adorned with statues of nymphs, which seem to dance in the light of lanterns hanging between the trees.
The pathways, paved with white gravel, lead to several intimate corners: pergolas entwined with vines, small fountains with crystal-clear water, and gazebos with comfortable seats covered in cushions. On one side of the garden stands a long wooden pavilion, decorated with fresh flowers — a place designated for dancing and speeches.
The air is filled with the scent of lavender and rosemary, blending with the delicate fragrance of citrus coming from a small orchard in the distance. The night sky is clear, and the warm light of the lanterns gives the space a cozy atmosphere, though in the background, the echoes of conversations and the laughter of the guests rise up.
Regulus leans against the wall near the terrace, watching the guests gathered at the party. He can’t see James anywhere, so he starts to wonder if he might have left him alone for too long. After a moment, he spots him in the company of Marlene, who is saying something with clear enthusiasm. James nods, but he seems slightly tense.
Finally, James notices him, and as soon as he approaches, he places his hand on his shoulder, smiling widely.
“Is everything alright, darling?” he asks a bit too loudly, so that everyone nearby can hear. Regulus blinks in disbelief, but quickly regains his composed expression.
“Darling?” he murmurs, so quietly that only James can hear.
“I’m trying to be convincing,” Potter replies, smiling innocently. Before Regulus can say anything, Bellatrix approaches them, holding a glass in her hand and giving them a look that seems to pierce through them.
“Regulus,” she starts, stopping right in front of them. “Nice to see you’ve finally found someone.” Regulus immediately tenses up, and James can probably feel the muscles in his arm stiffen under his hand.
“Bellatrix,” he responds coldly. “I didn’t expect you to bother coming over.”
“Oh, I’m naturally curious. Especially when it comes to family.” Her gaze shifts to the other man, and her smile becomes even more insincere. “James, right?”
“Nice to meet you,” the bespectacled one replies, trying to sound polite, though Bellatrix’s tone clearly gives him an unpleasant shiver.
“Of course.” Her eyes narrow slightly, as if she’s analyzing every move they make. “You two look… interesting together.” Regulus clears his throat and looks at James with barely concealed irritation before ostentatiously wrapping his arm around his waist.
“Yes. We’re quite… in sync,” he responds, though his voice sounds stiff. James, not wanting to fall behind, moves his hand to Regulus’s back and leans in closer.
“Reg can be a bit reserved, but we’re working on it, right?” he says with a smile that’s meant to be playful, but only deepens the irritation in Regulus’s eyes. Bellatrix squints, clearly unconvinced.
“Well, I’m glad you found someone who can put up with you, cousin. I always thought your cold nature would drive away any potential partner.”
“Your concern for my love life is truly touching, Bella,” Regulus replies, smiling insincerely.
“Ah, always so eloquent,” Bellatrix laughs artificially before raising her glass in a gesture of toast. “Have fun, you two.”
As soon as she leaves, Regulus steps away from James, looking at him with irritation.
“Do you have to be so theatrical?”
“We need to be convincing, remember?” James says, trying to suppress a laugh. “Besides, you’re doing great.”
“That was awful,” Black hisses, rubbing his face with his hand.
“But it worked. Bella bought it completely.”
“Probably because she’s an idiot,” Regulus mutters, rubbing his face again. “I don’t know how much longer I can take this.”
He walks away, not wanting to prolong the strange atmosphere that’s settled between him and James. It seems that they’re even better at flirting in private than they are in front of family. Regulus knows Bellatrix, and he knows this probably didn’t convince her, which means a few more scenes with his cousin are still waiting for him.
His plan for the evening is to avoid Evan and Barty. With each passing minute, he feels the weight on his chest growing heavier, and the garden lanterns, casting warm light on the partying guests, seem to mock his mood. The hum of conversations, laughter, and the sound of glasses clinking in toasts reach him like a noise from behind glass. His gaze involuntarily drifts over faces in the crowd, avoiding familiar silhouettes, though he knows it’s inevitable. He’ll run into them eventually.
Pandora comes up to him and watches him closely. Sometimes she breaks the silence with a comment about someone’s dress or the decorations, trying to distract him. Regulus responds in monosyllables, too focused on keeping his mask of cold composure.
“Reg, are you okay?” she asks softly, leaning toward him.
“Yeah. Perfect,” he replies with sarcasm, staring into the glass of champagne he holds in his hand.
He doesn’t have a chance to answer further, because he sees them. Evan and Barty are heading toward them. Rosier is calm as always, standing tall with a composed expression, while Crouch looks like he’s about to explode, his pace quick, and his hand nervously clenched on the edge of his jacket.
Regulus feels the tension in his body reaching its peak. His heart starts beating faster, and his breath becomes shallow.
“Regulus,” Evan begins, as soon as they’re close enough. His voice is calm, almost pleading. “Can we talk?” he adds quickly before Regulus has a chance to walk away.
“I think we don’t have anything left to talk about,” he responds coldly, trying to make his voice sound firm. Pandora, standing beside him, furrows her brow but doesn’t move an inch.
“Reg, this wasn’t how it was supposed to go,” Evan tries.
“This wasn’t how it was supposed to go?” Black repeats, a note of bitter amusement in his voice. “Really? So how was it supposed to go? Were you planning to tell me about your relationship at your wedding? Or maybe never?”
“It wasn’t like that,” Barty cuts in, his voice firmer than Evan’s, almost challenging. “It was our business, not…”
“Our business?” Regulus takes a step toward them, his eyes flashing with suppressed emotion. “We’ve been friends for years, and you couldn’t trust me?”
“It’s not that we didn’t trust you…” Evan begins, but Regulus interrupts him with a gesture of his hand.
“You didn’t trust me,” he says quietly, but there’s something in his voice that makes Evan fall silent. “If you had trusted me, you would’ve told me.”
Pandora watches this scene from the side, her heart breaking at the sight of her brother and best friend. Finally, though, Regulus turns away, unable to endure the looks directed at him any longer.
“Regulus…” Evan tries to stop him, but Pandora places her hand on his shoulder.
“Give him time,” she says softly.
Regulus walks through the garden, passing groups of guests who glance at him with curiosity. Taking deep breaths, he turns behind the nearest trees, seeking solitude. He still feels as if the entire world is screaming at him about how deeply he’s been betrayed.
“Reg?” he hears Pandora’s soft voice behind him. He turns around, and his friend looks at him with concern and pain in her eyes.
“I couldn’t…” he begins, but his voice cracks.
“I know,” Pandora hugs him tightly, and he finally allows himself a moment of weakness, closing his eyes and breathing deeply in her arms.
Despite the crowd and the party, despite the conversations and the looks surrounding him, he feels for a moment less lonely and sad.
But only for a moment, because suddenly he spots James, and the guilt returns over how distant he’s been toward him.