Regulus is happy to have kissed James
They had avoided most of the ensuing euphoria thanks to Lily Evans who walked in behind Remus and Sirius.
The key word here was most.
When none of them answered Sirius's question, he burst out laughing, almost falling to the floor, Lupin catching him.
"Je l'savais, je l'savais!" He chanted.
"Brotherfucker!"
Lupin didn't say anything, but he smiled at us, while Sirius was saying more things along the lines of "I knew it", "I've been waiting for this", and "That's disgusting", all in either English or French.
Sirius seemed to be trying to decide between disgust and joy. Regulus was relieved, although he didn't know from what. It's not like he expected his brother to have a bad reaction or anything.
Evans said "Congrats", which was almost worse than Sirius's litany of smiling excitement.
The three sat down in front of them, a smile on their lips.
Regulus let the conversation drag on, preferring not to be involved. He looked at the trees passing by the window, still processing what just happened. He had kissed James Potter.
His mother would cut him until he bled out and died. It was already bad she had one gay son, but two? With a Potter?
Suddenly, the cabin felt too tight. He thought about his mother's fury and his dad's disappointment. His breathing came in short pants, and he felt his throat closing up. He couldn't stop his mind from imagining the sharp sting of his mother's cutting spell or his father's vile insults.
Regulus was having a panic attack. He knew it, but no breathing exercise that Madam Pomfrey had given him last year worked.
Just as he thought he would black out, he felt a soft tickling feeling on his left hand. He looked down to see that James had taken his hand and was rubbing soft circles on his palm. Focusing on that sensation, Regulus's breathing evened and his shoulders sagged with relief.
He forced himself to banish any thoughts about his family for now. He would deal with it later.
He closed his eyes, trying to remember the feeling of James's lips on his, his hands on Regulus's hips.
Reggie had always found Potter handsome, although he didn't think anything of it. Everyone found James Potter handsome. He was a jock, he was popular, he was smart, and he could pull off any stunt. Regulus was pretty sure half the female population in Hogwarts liked him.
Everybody could admit that James was attractive: they boy had a perfect balance between nerdy and sporty, with a beautifully symmetrical face that only got prettier with glasses on, tanned skin, and curly dark brown hair.
At first, Reg disliked him, for no particular reason other than he thought all of his kindness was an act. A facade to get people to like him, because Regulus thought that a person could not possibly act like James Potter did, and actually mean it.
But then James started to talk to him, to hang out, and Regulus, begrudgingly, began to enjoy his presence.
It was last year, in his fourth year, that he started noticing James. The way his skin glistened after a quidditch practice, the way his smile brightened his face, the way he seemed to care about everybody with his whole heart, and his abs.
Well yes, Regulus had noticed James' abs, and he couldn't get they out of his head.
He opened his eyes, surprised to see that more people had joined the cramped space. He was grateful that they were all friends of his.
There was Evan and Barty, who everyone in the friend group noticed the chemistry between them except, of course, them. They sat next to James and him. He knew these two the most since they were his dorm mates.
Mary McDonald had also joined, sitting next to Lily.
Regulus had is own suspicion that the two girls were also a little more that best friends.
Everybody was talking to and over each other, without it actually bothering anyone. Reg caught on that Evan, Barty, his brother and James were talking about a muggle singer's new album that had dropped, while Lily and Mary were gossiping in their own world.
It was a comfortable sort of chaos, and for the first time, Regulus thought he saw his place in this.
He looked across at Lupin, who didn't talk much. Their eyes met, and a mutual understanding passed between them. Something words can not describe. The two of them knew that in this loud, bustling friend group, they had found their place, even if they didn't act like the rest.
Regulus rather liked Remus Lupin. He was calmer, softer, and had a passion for literature that Reg could only admire.
James had gone back to his usual, social, and loud self, so different from the quiet and understanding self he was with Regulus.
He was passionately arguing with Sirius on the muggle rock star's best song, something about "Starman" or "Suffragette City". Regulus didn't understand but he felt happy simply staring at Jame's face.
There was something about his wild hair, playboy smirk and sparkling eyes that made Regulus' heart flutter.
Regulus wanted to kiss James again. This was his first kiss, he didn't know if James knew that. He hoped it would happen again, that James would decide that he was not just a waste of time, and maybe even decide to go out with him.
Maybe Potter would accept him as he was-- not many people could do that. Maybe they could face the homophobia and hate that were inevitably going to get thrown their way. Maybe they could grow old together. An image of James with grey streaks in his hair and wrinkles creasing his forehead, none of them making him less handsome flashed in Regulus' mind.
Reggie gave himself a mental shake. His fantasizing was getting out of hand.
For the rest of the long train ride, the small group chatted and ate like there was no care in the world. In this stuffy, smelly, and rattling train compartment, they were protected from the rest of the world. Regulus found himself laughing at Sirius's jokes and even giving his opinion, although he refrained from doing too much. After all, he was still his introverted self.
As the train pulled into the station in Hogsmeade, they all stretched and got their luggage. It was late now, the sun had set long ago.
Regulus stretched his sore muscles, and shivered as James lightly stroked his hips and side in a casual manner.
As they got off the train and into the station, Regulus realized that James had never dropped his hand.
For some foolish reason, that filled his heart with overwhelming and pure joy.