Regulus Black had just exited potions, his pace fast as palms sweaty. He had his head lowered to hide the raging, threatening, and utterly pathetic tears from escaping his eyes.
As he reached the Slytherin common room his panic was at a high, his legs trembling beneath himself. He stumbled to his shared room, throwing himself into the thin four poster bed, drawing the curtains and casting the strongest silence spell around himself.
His mother knew. His mother was disgusted. Regulus was to be thrown out like trash, like the instructions to build a cabinet once there of no use because you lost a piece of the build itself. His mother knew he was gay. How she found out he may never know. Malfoy must of tipped him off in spite.
Regulus panted as he gripped his robes, tearing them off as his body was growing hot in panic and fear. Before he knew it his body was taken over by exhaustion and lack of air due to hyperventilation.
—-
Regulus was frozen, staring down at the letter that sat in between him and his love for James Potter.
“Are you going to keep staring at that letter like it’s your mother herself or are you going to open it,” Barty, his Slytherin classmate, snarked jokingly. If only he knew the meaning of what he just said.
“Shut up Barty, mind your own fucking business,” Regulus replied quickly. His voice was cold, but no amount of strength could hide the shakiness in his voice.
“Merlin, I was just joking mate!” Barty bit back. His and several other Slytherin’s faces were laced in surprise from Regulus' not particularly unusual cold demeanor, but it was different, it had meaning.
“Then get funnier Crouch” Regulus rose from the Slytherin table, taking the letter with him. He stormed to his room, horrified of what little amount of the whole fury the letter contained.
—-
Regulus Arcturus Black
You disgust me. What did you gather from my supreme and necessary guidance in your training, for YOUR future, Did you find the path of being attracted to another male. I hope you're disgusted in yourself. You will stay atHogwarts for Yule, when summer arrives and you return home you better have an excellent speech and beg for forgiveness ready, if you want to remain in this family, in MY PROTECTION. Do not disappoint me more.
——
Regulus released the breath he was holding for so long. Disappointed. His mother was disappointed.
That wasn’t Regulus’ thing, making people disappointed. It was Sirius’, his brother's thing. But now it seemed to be the only thing Regulus could do. Sirius was disappointed that Regulus stole James away from him. His mother and Father were disappointed, he now was no more than a disgrace for loving the same sex as his own. And only Merlin knew who else was disappointed in him. If Regulus could guess…..everyone. James was probably disappointed as well, for being a coward. Not being brave enough to show his love for James.
——
Regulus did one thing before he decided to put an end to everyone’s disappointment.
One thing. One thing that he was sure everyone would surely even just nod at him in approval. That’s all Regulus wanted, right? Sirius said the most. Regulus was a nothing but a whore for his mother’s attention and approval and an addict to anyone else’s.
Regulus was always at the top of his studies, this made his gift to everyone an easy task. Everyone that knew him, well anyone he could think of and was in reason, (regulus could only do so much, spare your disappointed looks), he obliviated. He erased the one thing that brought everyone dispare from their memories. Himself. Once everyone was left happier than before, Regulus gave the grand ending to the gift. His own.
—-
Regulus felt at peace for once. The water that filled his lungs and took the place of air burned with satisfaction. His body that once was a typical seventy percent water ranked up as his body filled and suffocated. The light he could see from the sky as he drowned was vanishing, not from him losing consciousness and his life, but from how far he was going down the water. Regulus made sure before his suicide to place the heaviest bricks and weights to himself to ensure death. It was a precaution in case he became to regret it and swim to the surface, he wouldn’t be able to.
Regulus thought of James as his body turned paler than usual as his organs were failing drastically. It seemed the only thing left was his heart. Regulus tried to scream as he felt it. Death. Wow, was it strong? The words he pushed through his lips “I love you James”, but they only appeared as bubbles in the water, also known as his last breath.