xmas cards
Regulus was dead. He had died. He was only 19 when it happened. Sirius had to keep reminding himself. He was “lying low” at Grimmauld Place, waiting for Remus to come back from shopping. It was like he was young again; shut up in the house with nothing to do, no one to talk to, basically in perpetual time-out. He hated this. He didn’t even have Regulus to distract him, or annoy him, or call for him to get something or other like he used to when they were kids and their parents would leave the house.
Sirius crept up the stairs to Regulus’ old room. He hadn’t been there for years. He was afraid. Of what, he didn’t know. Maybe he was scared he’d see Regulus again, or his ghost, or ruin the sanctuary that is his room.
The door creaks open, the hinges rusted and dusty, the knob untouched. The sign on his door, a plate of solid gold engraved with “Do Not Enter without the express permission of R.A.B”, was still polished and perfect, just as Regulus liked --- Sirius always made sure to polish it when he was cleaning.
The dust on the floor pushes aside with the door. He creeps inside, hesitant and unwilling to ruin everything. He grabs a broom from the hallways, clearing the dust from the floor so he won’t be able to see the footsteps he leaves. He creeps towards the closet, opening it with slightly misty eyes. He sees a pile of boxes near the corner, cleaning off more dust and making sure everything is practically spotless before grabbing a box labeled “Notes” and sitting on the floor with it, assuming it’s just old school stuff but wanted to see his handwriting again. He shakily opens it and sees, not school notes, but letters to his friends and other people. It’s organized by time and person. Most of them are to Barty, Evan, Dorcas, and Pandora, but there’s a few to and from Sirius. He must’ve been collecting them for everyone, as there are multiple back and forth conversations in the box. He finds a tag labeled with a little heart, almost unnoticeable if it weren’t for the fact that it was labeled so very differently. Sirius hesitates before looking through them.
All it is is letters between him and James. He notices the signature James always signs literally everything with and reads through the letters. It’s so many love letters, all lovey dovey and overly sweet. Sirius feels almost sick. How did he not know? Why would they keep it from him?
Looking a bit further back, there's a stack of Christmas cards between Regulus, James, and James’ parents. It’s sweet, Sirius can’t believe he didn’t know about it. He reorganizes Regulus’ letters, as if Reg would know he’s in there, and puts the box back exactly where it was. He leaves the room, making sure he shuts the door behind him before running to his room and crying like a dramatic teenager, in complete shock he’s missed such a big part of his own brother’s life.
Remus finds him just like that, heart seeming to break at the very sight.