Bleeding hearts

Gryffindors aren’t exactly known for thinking first, acting second. It’s mostly the opposite.

Hongjoong really wishes that he had managed to evade that particular stereotype. At least then, he wouldn’t be watching his own doom approach whilst he remained helpless to evade it.

Apparently when Park Seonghwa declared it’s on, he really meant it.

What had started as friendly pranks amongst the two teams had barreled out into a full blown war between the two houses. Crossing any hallways between classes was becoming downright impossible without having to waddle your way to madam Pomfrey with giant duck feet in place of your own. Or you’d turn away from your cauldron for a second and it explodes in your face when you turn back because someone had slipped a dozen frog eyes in and messed with the whole solution. Or you’d go to the lavatory and run out screaming because they’d been hexed to scream profanities at whoever tried to use them.

The last one would have admittedly been hilarious if Wooyoung the idiot hadn’t accidentally hexed the gryffindors toilet as well. Hongjoong had almost flung himself out the vent window in fright when the toilet had suddenly started hollering and cursing his ‘tiny ass’.

Credit where credit was due, Wooyoung had nailed the halfway point of being an idiot and a genius.

But Hongjoong would appreciate that more if he wasn’t so scared to go to the bathroom anymore or if he could get Mingi to stop laughing himself to tears over his ‘tiny ass’.

The teachers too, were starting to get a little aggravated with all the pranks. Slughorn had laughed along at first but after one too many potion explosions and students having to be excused because their ears won’t stop steaming, he wasn’t all too amused. Professor Sprout for one, had had an absolute cow when the whole of the Gryffindors third year students had jinxed the pelli petals to compel the Slytherins to dance uncontrollably every time they twisted their petals.

All in all, patience was running out on the faculty’s side and if Hongjoong was a smarter, more responsible man, he would have called it quits.

And he really did intend to do so but then…..

Park

Fucking

Seonghwa

If he was to be fair, he could grudgingly admit that their retaliation was more than justified. Wednesday morning had the Gryffindor team hopping around in screeches as their quidditch gowns- which had been empty and clean when they’d put them on, how did the bastards even do it?- suddenly started fluttering as owls indignantly squawked and scratched their way out of theirs. Wooyoung’s gown miraculously only had a tiny cute baby owl yet he still screeched the loudest.

In contrast, Hongjoong couldn’t even manage to yell without inhaling a fistful of feathers as not one, not two, but three fully grown owls somehow tore their way through his robes.

He spat out a mouthful of feathers, gagging at the rather, shall we say, lavatory scent and rushed out to grab some water, passing the menace himself. Seonghwa leant against their door, his sleeves rolled up to his elbow, and a smug smile aimed at him as he carelessly spun his wand between his fingers. Forgetting the odd taste he had wanted to wash out, he stopped to glare at the taller boy but his profanities and threats were interrupted when Seonghwa lazily spun his wand and he yelped as his pant leg started to flutter aggressively and he felt the rapid beatings of wings and the sharp scratches of claws dragging against his skin and a fourth owl fought its way out of his clothes.

He gritted his teeth and retreated but any responsible goodwill had all but vanished.

If it had been anyone else to have been standing there, he would have grudgingly admitted that it was a good retaliation for his frog shower prank and he’d admire their spell casting before calling it truce.

But Hongjoong’s blood positively boiled as he recalled Seonghwa’s smirk and how he’d leant against the wall watching Hongjoong make a fool out of himself, looking all tall and prideful. And when the next day he overheard the girls who sat behind him in history of magic giggling and swooning over Park Seonghwa and how powerful and smart he was, he set out with a renowned determination to one up the other.

And its with the image of that smirk floating in his heads that compels him to jinx the trees in the back courtyard (where he knew Seonghwa like to lounge around with his friends, probably because a lot of girls hung around the fountain and of course the bastard would enjoy how they all drooled over him) to chuck small boulders of mud at him anytime he passed. He laughed until he cried the first time Seonghwa’s carefully styled hair was ruined as the willow tree petulantly launched a root out to splatter him with mud and a new image of Seonghwa’s dumb founded dirty face replaced the smirky one.

Though not completely apparently because Hongjoong couldn’t stop thinking about it. Everytime he remembered how he’d looked while Hongjoong had been hopping around covered in bird feathers and…..other things, his stomach coiled tightly and blood rushed to his head. Seonghwa had an effect on him like no one else and with each recallance, his determination to take the other down grew.

So it continued on. Hongjoong ‘borrowed’ (okay, he may have kidnapped it but it was Mingi and Jongho’s idea so he allows himself to not feel too guilty about it) a rooster from Hagrid and charmed it to confuse night with day and then let it break free in the Slytherin’s common room. He whispered a quick enchantment as he passed over the grand staircase and chuckled in glee when Seonghwa suddenly began to sprout bubbles every time he tried to talk. He cackled with Wooyoung when they managed to sneak in some Weasley firecrackers into Seonghwa’s bag and watched him stand dumbfounded as his bag suddenly exploded.

And Seonghwa didn’t take it standing. Over the next course of weeks, Hongjoong’s scrolls had been bewitched to have the words dance around anytime anyone tried to read them and he was forced to do a week's worth of homework again. Any classroom he walked into would have its door screech in the sound of multiple women disgracing his ‘dishonorable’ actions and he had to have a very uncomfortable conversation with Mcgonagal and swear he had not done anything and it was just the doors causing the ruckus. His potions exploded for little to no reason and after three trips to Madam Pomfrey to have her grow back his eyebrows, she declared him a hazard to his own appearance and he was forced to spend the next few classes wearing a large pink visor and safety goggles that looked so ridiculous that Yunho and Seonghwa turned pink from laughter.

He wasn’t the only one who suffered. Mingi had taken to running down the halls in an attempt to escape any quick jinxes and transfiguration charms and yet still, he’d end up grumpily going to Pomfrey with some new animal parts modified on his body. Wooyoung had laughed himself to tears when a little pigtail had grown out Mingi’s back and had only stopped when Mingi retaliate by trying to make Wooyoung grow cat ears.

It had gone poorly because transfiguration had never been Mingi’s strong point and he accidentally gave Wooyoung claws instead and had spent the better part of the next hour running away from the other to avoid getting scratched.

Jongho and Wooyoung had seemingly been spared from the worst of the pranks. Jongho, because Seonghwa and his team seemed to have a soft spot for the youngest of their group and left him be. The worst he was exposed to were childish muggle pranks, fart cushions and fake gum that shocked anyone who tried to pull them out. Mingi screeched at the unfairness of the situation and took it upon himself to prank Jongho only to have that backfire on him because San and Yunho teamed up with the youngest to retaliate on Mingi instead.

The poor bastard was just unlucky like that.

Wooyoung still had pranks played on him but much tamer, as compared to Hongjoong. For every 4 body modification spells Hongjoong would be jinxed with, Wooyoung would get one and that too Seonghwa would fix himself after an hour or so. For every cauldron that would explode, San would laugh but would also help Wooyoung redo the potion an hour later. Even Yeosang, who was the poor victim of Wooyoung’s many creative pranks, never retaliated, opting to instead sigh in defeat even though Hongjoong was well aware that the other was a genius when it came to quick jinxes.

It wasn’t a surprise and Hongjoong didn’t resent him for it. If he was to ever grudgingly admit one of Park Seonghwa’s better qualities (and keep in mind, he’d rather face a troll wandless), it was that he was fiercely protective of his younger cousin. No matter how much they fought or teased one another, Seonghwa would rather die than harm Wooyoung, even jokingly and Hongjoong has to give him credits for that.

Or not. It wasn’t like Seonghwa was a special case. Wooyoung had the endearing quality of having everyone adore him. Hongjoong himself had fallen under the younger’s spell and he wholeheartedly believes that there was no other option. Wooyoung was rather-and he’d never say it aloud because he has a reputation to uphold- precious. He was so genuine and curious in anything he did and anyone he met, so pure for a world that wasn’t always kind. Hongjoong hadn’t gotten along with Wooyoung overly well at first, a little overwhelmed by his chaotic and overpowering energy but once they’d gotten through the initial icebreakers, he was just as, if not more, protective of the younger.

Still, Hongjoong knew that Seonghwa and Wooyoung had a different bond, more special than just merely cousins. Wooyoung had told them that he and Seonghwa, along with Wooyoung’s actual older brother and now another younger brother, grew up together and that they lived in the same house since he could remember. Wooyoung had always seen Seonghwa as a brother and as far as Hongjoong had observed, it went vice versa too.

Seonghwa made a habit of always checking up on Wooyoung, making sure he’s safe and happy. Hongjoong remembered an incident where a bunch of third year gits had cornered Wooyoung and roughed him up a bit when the younger was still in his first year. Hongjoong hadn’t even been friends with Wooyoung at that point but even he had been outraged at the unnecessary haggling and had set out, at the pipsqueak age of 12, to teach those bullies a lesson.

It turns out it hadn’t been needed because when Seonghwa got word of it, he’d stormed off to handle it himself. And that had been the first time that Hongjoong had learnt just how skilled of a wizard the older was because the hexes he performed were so advanced that even the fourth year students were left with their mouths hanging open.

That had been the beginning of a well understood rule that quickly sped through the school. You do not mess with Park Seonghwa and by extension, anyone he cares about unless you too would like your whole body to be covered in blood sucking 300 toothed slugs leeching off your body.

Seonghwa’s stunt, while getting him into heaps of trouble and almost expelled, had also gotten him very popular and it didn’t help that he was rather insanely good looking and an excellent quidditch player. He became a subject of awe and as it was with most impressionable teenagers, his fellow peers began to adopt his mannerisms, hobbies and thinking to be more like him or to stay on his good side. Which was probably why Wooyoung was one of the rare Gryffindors to have access to the Slytherin common room 24/7 and how he had so many friends there. He was important to Seonghwa and the eldest liked having him close, and thus so did everyone else.

Now, years later, there had been a sort of tentative group that had formed thanks to Wooyoung as the middle link. Wooyoung had already been friends with Yeosang and after being introduced to San, the two got along like fire and wood. When Jongho had joined Hogwarts and been sorted into Gryffindor, Wooyoung had made an active effort to look after and befriend the younger boy, something which had made San immensely grateful and make their bond even tighter. Eventually, Wooyoung had introduced him to Mingi, who he roomed with and Mingi in turn, introduced the two to Yunho and now, the six of them were a rather tight knit group.

The issue came with him and Seonghwa. With their friends so close to one another, the two had shared a few evenings lounging in each other's company but Hongjoong wouldn’t say their friends. There’s a rather viciously sharp energy between them, like electricity and on their more hostile days, the two would spend the hangout throwing jabs at one another. On the calmer days, they tended to ignore one another (although Seonghwa always seems to be planning something because any time Hongjoong would glance at the eldest, he’d catch him looking back) except for some teasing remarks here and there (mostly from Seonghwa, Hongjoong would rather not waste his time talking to the eldest if he could help it).

Thus, it is on one of those odd hangouts where all hell breaks loose and they finally land themselves in trouble.

He was particularly starving when he wandered into the great hall for dinner. He’d spent the better part of the day bent over his desk as he drew out match plans, muttering to himself as he used his wands to make the stick figures representing his team act out the game plan. And he’d been so absorbed in it that he hadn’t realised that he was late for Ancient runes and there had been no time for lunch. His professor hadn’t been happy with his tardiness (it was an unfortunate habit) and he had been given the task to write a patronizing essay 2 parchments long over why he was a ‘dumb dumb’ which was to be handed in just before dusk.

His eyes were still twitching from all the time spent squinting at the parchments but he was sure that the way they twitched when he saw his friends all gathered in a huddle on the Slytherin table with his mortal enemy.

Seonghwa, to his credit, stayed oblivious and unbothered by Hongjoong’s ire as he ate his mashed potatoes.

Suddenly feeling rather tired, he debates sneaking a plate out and going to eat it in the quad instead. He’s exhausted and he truly doesn’t have his usual energy to deal with the other captain today.

He’s still contemplating when Yunho, unfortunately, spots him and enthusiastically waves him over.

“Hyung! Come eat.” Hongjoong internally groans and he fidgets where he’s stood, a few feet away. The rest of the group turn to look at him invitingly, all safe for Yeosang, who seems to be gazing rather thoughtfully up at the bewitched ceiling and Seonghwa, who only spares him a glance before continuing to eat.

His lack of smugness or any signs of clear mischief should have made Hongjoong relax but it only made him wary.

He had been the last one to retaliate in their prank war. It had been three days since he’d performed a tickle charm on Seonghwa at the lake but Seonghwa was yet to get him back for it. And while a prank right now would be justified and rather expected, Hongjoong is just so damn tired and hungry and for once, he is in no mood to play along.

When he continues to hover, San calls out, “Come on hyung, we haven’t all hung out together in so long.”

“For good reasons.”

“You started it.” San reminded and Hongjoong groans so loudly that the other laughs. “No pranks that end with us in the infirmary, hyung. Promise. We’re all just hanging out.”

“Mingi’s hair is literally pink right now.” Hongjoong deadpanned and that finally made Yeosang tune back into the conversation, his proud smile indicating that he had been the one behind the stunt.

“Yeah, but I actually like it.” Mingi said brightly and behind him, Yunho gave a small nod, almost absentmindedly as he stared at Mingi’s hair. He seems to catch himself though and hurriedly looks away but Hongjoong notices how his ears turn red.

“I forgot to factor in his god complex when I pulled that prank. He likes everything about himself.” Yeosang complained seriously and Mingi continued grinning proudly, eliciting an eye roll from the Slytherin.

“You see hyung? No serious pranks. It’s a time out. Come sit.”

Hongjoong makes his way over to the bench but right before sitting, he hesitates, looking suspiciously at Seonghwa. The older ignores him for a few seconds (and he knows he’s being ignored because that damn smirk is back) before he finally looks up and raises a brow at him.

“Trouble?”

“You haven’t exactly said time out.”

“I thought their words were enough.”

“It isn’t. You’re the main fucker.”

“Well, assume they spoke on my behalf too.”

“I’d rather hear you say it.”

“You’re paranoid.”

“You’re annoying.”

“Witty comeback loser.”

“Bad breath, ugly.”

Seonghwa barked out a laugh and Hongjoong flushes in relief of having come off victorious of their little spat, as weak as his comeback may be. He gets that flush often but always only with Seonghwa.

The other boy pulls at nerves that he didn’t even know he possessed.

“Time out. No serious pranks that end with us seeing Madam Pomfrey again. Happy?”

“Giddy.” Hongjoong replies flatly and finally plops down between Jongho and Yeosang. He’s still wary but the sight of all the warm tasty food dished out in front of him is making his mouth water and any other thoughts flee his head as he focuses on filling his plate up. Chatter picks up around him and if he was a bit more present, he would have noticed how Seonghwa was glancing up at him through his lashes and how eagerly Yeosang was watching him as he spooned some of the potatoes and gravy on his fork and bought it to his mouth-

He’s already swallowed it when the flavor hits.

Immediately he’s gagging, pushing himself away from the table as he begins to cough and splutter. He fans at his tongue and his eyes begin to tear up as the inside of his mouth throbs with the heat and pain from the unnaturally spicy taste that seems to layer his tongue in relentless fire.

Through his teary eyes and coughs, he sees Seonghwa watching him calmly and as he slowly brings his spoon up to feed from it, he’s giving Hongjoong that stupid smug smirk again.

Son of a bitch

A goblet is suddenly pushed in front of him, San watching him with a twinkle of amusement and slight worry as he nudges it into his hand. He grabs it gratefully and chugs the deliciously cool water down his throat and then three more until the burning begins to recede.

His ears are ringing slightly and he looks to his side to glare at his younger friends, who immediately stifled their laughter. Even Mingi shut up, though the fact that his face was now as pink as his hair as he tries to hold in his laughter and the sight just puts Hongjoong in a worse mood.

He finally turns his glare to Seonghwa, who is still calmly just eating. He must have moved sometime though because there was now a small empty vial laid next to his hands, the inside of it stained red and a clear indication that it had been the secret spicy ingredient added to his food. Although Seonghwa had managed to add it to his plate specifically, he was stumped.

“Are you just incapable of keeping your word,Seonghwa?”

“I kept my word.”

“Are you too slow to process what no more pranks means?”

“Not as slow as you apparently.” Seonghwa replied smoothly and oh, Hongjoong would give anything to smack that stupid lopsided grin off his face. “I said no pranks that land you in the infirmary. And as far as I can see, you don’t need an infirmary. A stage perhaps, for your theatrics but alas…..no infirmary.”

He could just see it, how proud the older one was for being a smartass and having resorted to simple, childish, easy- so easy a muggle could pull it off- prank and oh, how he loathed seeing him sit there, all prideful and coy, like a cat who had been given a saucer of cream. He could literally see him metaphorically patting himself on the back and that, topped with the snickers that were still coming from his side and the fact that he was so exhausted, led him to do something which was simultaneously very childish yet very therapeutic.

“You may need to go to the infirmary to get the potatoes out of your nose.” He retorts in a strained voice and before Seonghwa could even look up at him properly, Hongjoong has swung his arm over his head and watches in glee as Seonghwa’s face drops in surprise for a fraction of a second before it is splattered under his plate.

There is a rather comical pause where the plate stays stuck to Seonghwa’s face, leaving him looking like an odd mannequin still holding his fork and knife, before it slides a little and then clatters down on the table. In its wake, Seonghwa is completely covered in all kinds of food, including a few peas that roll off his hair and onto the table.

Stunned and awed silence surrounds them and it’s only broken when Seonghwa lets out a long breath of air as he incredulously says, “Did you just…..throw your plate on me?”

“Now who’s the slow one?” Hongjoong quips, wishing he had a camera to take a photo of this moment. Whatever shit Seonghwa would retaliate with was worth it for the image of Park Seonghwa having gravy drip off his ear.

Hunger appeased (both for revenge and the actual one), he gets to his feet, graciously giving his still frozen remaining friends a wave as he turns to leave.

He takes only one step when he hears a gasp and then he’s yelping as something ice cold is splashed onto the back of his head.

He whips back around and Seonghwa is on his feet, holding an empty goblet and daring him on with his own glare.

The two just stand there for a moment, sizing one another up and taking in what the other had done.

And then they were both lurching forward at the same time and grabbing what they could to chuck at the other.

It’s a wild dash of arms winding like sling shots and blindly feeling around to grab more food and then, Hongjoong hears Wooyoung’s telltale screech and makes the mistake of turning his head to see the cause because the side of his face gets hit with the pumpkin pie, splatters of it flying off and landing on Mingi.

He has a moment to glimpse both Mingi and Wooyoung gathering themselves and grabbing handfuls of crushed biscuits and throwing them at their slytherin friends before he gets another drink thrown on him and then he’s back to aiming at Seonghwa.

And then suddenly food was flying everywhere and Hongjoong was getting hit left and right and at this point, he couldn’t even see where Seonghwa was but he tossed anything and everything he could get his hands on and hoped that he’d manage to catch the bastard with a lucky shot.

But then suddenly there was more food being launched at him and Hongjoong realized belatedly that quite a few of the Slytherins had joined in and that he and his teammates were grossly outnumbered.

As he was hit with a mouthful of pudding, he was just mournfully contemplating retreating when a war cry sounded from behind and he distinctively caught, “Hey, they’re playing dirty!”

“Four against Thirty?!? Hell no!”

“Have some boiled peas, snakes!”

Oh that wasn’t good.

He uncovered his head to look behind and to his dismay and yet wonder, he saw the Gryffindors rushing in, ladled with bowls and plates of food. Ravenclaw, the unfortunate table caught in between, ducked under their seats to avoid the chaos but Hufflepuff were already caught up in the ceasefire and had jumped into join too. Suddenly, Hongjoong’s vision was just food and drinks everywhere and he’s frozen as he watches a third year slytherin boy tackle two Gryffindors to dump soggy meatloaf on him (why was it soggy?) and then only to be attacked further by three other students, whose houses Hongjoong couldn't even make out because of all the food covering them.

He turns back just in time to see a whole pudding cake soaring towards him and he jumps to the floor, covering his head as he crawls under the table. He wipes some gravy out his eyes- oh god that was gross and almost had a heart attack when he opened his eyes again and saw Seonghwa a mere inch or two away from them, absolutely hidden under the food that had gobbled him up.

Behind Seonghwa, he sees a pair of legs slide against spilled custard and he winces as the owner of the legs fly up and he comes crashing down with a thump. Seonghwa does too and then, because he is Park fucking Seonghwa and he can’t not ever piss Hongjoong off, he accusingly goes, “Look what you started!”

And Hongjoong is left to stare at him with his mouth hanging open before he gets enough of his wits together to splutter, “Me? You’re the one who added that lovely taste to my food!”

“You tossed the first dish!”

“As retaliation!”

“Who throws stuff when they get mad? What are you, five? Are you going to need a timeout soon?”

“I’m going to stuff your nose with potatoes again!” Hongjoong threatened seriously and there it was again, that odd coil in his stomach. It was like his body was physically incapable of being around Seonghwa without literally revolting against it and right now, with the two of them so close together that their knees are touching, it’s worse than ever-

“Like you could reach till my mouth, short stuff.” Seonghwa sniped in a low voice and yet Hongjoong caught all of it, despite the thundering yelling and poundings of feet running by. Seonghwa was watching him intently, perhaps wanting to add more insults or preparing himself for Hongjoong’s retort but whatever it was, Hongjoong never got to hear.

There was a series of loud explosive bangs from above and every sound in the Great hall fell away into a heavy hush. There is a ringing silence and then Hongjoong hears a terrifyingly familiar voice shake in anger as Headmistress Mcgonagall says, “The audacity …..how dare you…… Kim Hongjoong! Park Seonghwa! My office. Now!”

And Hongjoong did not need a picture to remind him of this particular moment of the first time he and his rival seemed to be on the same page as they both looked back at one another with wide fearful eyes.

Uh oh