Donuts
Donuts.
Fluffy, sweet, melt-in-your-mouth donuts.
He fucking hated donuts.
—
Regulus straightened his shirt, smoothing down the wrinkles and aligning the buttons. He dropped his hands to his sides. There was no use in trying to look proper, he always looked a mess.
He was yanked out of his thoughts by a knock at the door. Not as harsh as before, but still startling.
“Yes, come in.” He said calmly, trying to hide his nerves. “What is it?”
Sirius opened the door, humming a song regulus didn't recognize. “Breakfast.”
Regulus nodded and followed his brother out.
–
Mealtimes were always the arse end of hell for Regulus. For one thing, he hated eating. The feeling of chewing, the feeling of chunks running down his throat, and the god-awful idea of it staining his clean pink guts. He hated it. He felt tainted, dirty- he always felt dirty. He could feel the hands all over him- he was stained and tainted and his body was disgusting and he needed to preserve it.
But of course his family didnt believe in issues like his. They didnt believ in recovery, just fixing him. Fixing it with a short quick pop of a pill.
Pop pop pop.
Pills. So many fucking pills.
It reminded regulus of primary school, when his tutor would bring in a jar of candies and had him guess how many were in. He loved those games, they made him smile. Challenged his intellect, made him think.
All he does is think. He can never turn off his brain, it loops and swirls in circles. This story is all from his thoughts, of course. I am telling you my story. You will hear me.
Someone, anyone, will fucking hear me.
—
He wandered down the stairs, listening to the violin that echoed through the household. Bellatrix was playing, of course- who better than her. Her parents had been told she was locked up in an asylum for her… behavioural problems, but of course she wasn’t. As soon as she arrived here, her parents were retired in a more permanent sort of way and she was placed under the custody of Orion and Walburga Black.
The music suddenly stopped, frozen in place. The notes fell still in the air, making it thick with a sickly sweet taste.
Regulus quickened his pace, not wanting to interact with the only other sociopath in the home. He wasn’t just weary of her, no; he was afraid. He wasn’t afraid of anything, but she terrified him. She made him feel ways he hated- he felt no love, no connection to her whatsoever. Not even familial love. And that, above all, made his skin crawl like no else.
The violin resumed as regulus reached the bottom of the stairs. He let out the breath he didn't even realize he was holding and walked into the dining room where his family was sat.
His father was at the head of the table, mother to his right and Bellatrix’s empty chair to his left. Sirius sat next to their mother, and regulus beside the empty chair. All the other family members had left for Diagon Alley, so it was just them. As he sat down and his father began his usual morning complaining, a hard thud could be heard from upstairs followed by giggling. The giggling turned to laughing, then cackling, then full on screaming manic hysterical laughter. Everyone froze. The door slowly creaked open, and the laughter stopped.
For the first, and last time, Regulus saw his mother cry.
For the first and last time, Regulus saw his fathers face contort into that of fear.
Then the singing started.