Can't stop going back for more
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
James fucked up.
Wait.
Regulus kissed back
SO WHY WAS HE MAD?!
AHHHHHH.
Regulus was so confusing.
_________________
"Well my painting-"
"But anyway,"
Sirius kept talking over the top of Regulus.
Regulus just stared out the window, sinking into the couch. He's used to not being really seen or heard, but when someone just completly ignores the fact you said a word? Wow. Fuck him. They were meant to be all hanging out. All talking. apparently all but Regulus. He stares at the black crows on the grass. the way they all kind of do their own thing. birds always kinda mesmerized Regulus. The way they flew, their feathers. They're pretty.
"Hey Reg?"
James. James, James, James...
Sun. Warm. Honey. Sugar. Sweet.
That's what James' voice sounded like ripping through Regulus' thoughts about the stupid fucking stupid dumbass unimportant stupid fucking DUMB birds.
"Fuck off Potter."
James didn't move- Or stop talking for that matter. "C'mon Reg, wh-"
"Regulus." He corrected. "And I mean it, fuck off."
"Nah."
"Fuck you."
"Please."
Regulus glared at him, only to be met with a smirk.
"I'm still mad at you."
The smirk vanished, and James glanced at Sirius momentarily.
"shh, will you?"
But Sirius is too busy talking to Remus to notice.
"Whatever."
Silence.
"It was something about art?"
Regulus sighed and gave in.
"A piece I'm doing. its almost done."
"Can I see?"
"No."
"Oh. Okay."
Okay? Usually people nagged.
"...Anyway.."
silence.
"Me and Remus are going to bed" Sirius said.
"'Its like 5 pm?"
"Remus is tired."
"Sure." Regulus said sarcastically as Remus and Sirius walked away.
Regulus and James sat there quietly for a bit.
James speaks.
"I can go if you want."
"It's fine." he replied, praying James didn't notice how quickly he answered.
"Ok."
Silence.
"You kn-"
"I-"
They both went to talk at the same time. they both went quiet.
"Sorry." James said.
"It's fine."
more silence.
"I'm sorry I didn't ask."
"It's fine."
More silence. AHHHHHH. Stupid silence.
Regulus spoke up.
"Can we get high."
"What? No, Regulus!"
Regulus groaned.
"I want a distraction"
"Too bad"
"Distract me then" Regulus snapped.
"Oh I've got so many ways I could do that."
"Shut up."
"Make me"
"Fuck you."
"Please do"
"Shut. Up."
"Make. me."
Regulus glared at James and suddenly was very aware of how close they were.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
"Ask me to kiss you."
"Excuse me?"
"Reg, please."
"Fine. Kiss m-"
HOW DO KISSES WITH THE SAME PERSON GET BETTER EVERY MILLERSECOND AND WHY WAS REGULUS ON TOP OF JAMES BEFORE HE EVEN REALISED.
God.
god.
fuck fuck fuck fuck.
___________________
Regulus didn't just wake up to different feeling sheets, no clothes, an arm around his waist, his back to someone's chest.
No.
"Morning." He woke up to James' voice.
Regulus froze. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
"R-?"
"I hate you"
"You wouldn't have said that 5 hours ago."
Regulus didn't reply, letting himself sink into his surroundings. The dimly lit room, the quiet, the sheets, the pillows, the skin, James.. James... James...
"Hungry?"
James asked, out of nowhere.
Regulus just hummed in response.
"Waffles?" James asked
"Fucking waffles." He murmured.
______________________________
Regulus didn't yell or scream when he woke up with James. That's a start, right?Right? RIGHT?
"What did the fridge ever do to you?" Regulus asked, appearing in the doorway with... What, only a jumper on? As James slammed the door of the fridge.
"That's mine." James said, nodding to the Jumper.
"Not anymore."
"That's not very fair"
"I'll give it back eventually."
Silence.
"Do you want a coffee as well?"
"Yes please"
"My parents are out for the day, and so are Remus and Sirius. I'm going for a run and probably a drive. You've got the house to yourself most of the day."
"Can I come? Run?"
"I guess" James said, shrugging.
~~~~
"C'mon Reg! Keep up!"
"For fucks sake" James looked back as Regulus panted, head hung for a moment, obviously trying to speed up. "How do you run that fucking fast?!"
"You've just got little legs!"
"Fuck you!"
"I thought we established it was the other way around?"
Regulus groaned. James slowed down at a tree, and as soon as Regulus noticed, he collapsed on the grass near where James stopped. "I'm DYINGG."
"Toughen up." James teased.
"My legs hurrrt." Regulus complained.
"For multiple reasons." James said, smirking
"Shut up!" Regulus snapped.
James lay on the grass with Regulus.
"So are we gonna talk about-?"
"No."
FUCKING SILENCE.
"ok."
"mhm"
"Are you mad?"
"No"
"....Happy?"
"No."
"..."
"Can we go home now."
"Yeah."
Regulus sat up, then James did.
They walked back.
in very awkward silence.
Neither of them knew why, But once they got home, they locked eyes, and before either of them realized, James had Regulus pinned against a wall, kissing Regulus, who was kissing back.
Kissing Regulus' neck. Living for the sounds Regulus made in response.
________________________
His neck felt like fire. But in a good way..
You know?
God it felt so good but so bad at the same time.
Bad because that's his brothers best friend.
Bad because James probably still likes Lily.
Bad because Regulus just isn't good enough.
Bad because Regulus will probably fuck it up.
It feels exactly how it did the night before.
Fucking euphoric, But wrong.
James' fingers on his skin, James' hands running under his shirt.
James' hands on his back.
His own hands in James' hair.
James' stupid fucking smirk against Regulus' neck.
James' stupid fucking smile against his lips.
James, James, James, James..
James' hands taking Regulus' shirt off.
James pushing Regulus towards James' room.
James pinning Regulus against the door once they were in his room.
James' fingers fiddling with the zipper to his binder.
Regulus' binder falling off.
Regulus' breathing speeding up.
Regulus' mind going blank.
James' smirk still there.
James' teeth sinking into his neck slightly.
Regulus' mouth letting out sounds he shouldn't.
Regulus' head going back and hitting the door behind him.
James' body pressed against his.
Regulus' hands tightening in James' hair.
Again, It felt euphoric.
again.
again.
Gods, and it just kept getting better.
______________________________________
Regulus hated himself.
fuck.
He hated himself more when James rushed downstairs after getting changed so Effie didn't come up.
Regulus buried his face in the pillows.
You're fucking stupid.
You're an idiot.
Stupid fucking Regulus.
Are you fucking dumb?!
Once was enough.
TWICE?!
Fuckwit.
Absolute fucking idiot.
"My parents are going back out for dinner."
James.
James climbed back into his bed with Regulus, and Regulus melted into James' touch as his arms snaked back around Regulus' waist, Regulus' back to James' neck as James started kissing his neck gently.
"James?"
No reply.
"James.."
"Mhm?"
"I-"
"What's wrong?"
"I- I need to shower."
"Oh. Yeah. Right. Ok."
___________________
"What are you making?" Regulus asked, walking into the kitchen.
"Lasagna" James replied.
"Mph?"
"Do you like lasagna? I didn't even think to ask you- Usually people like it-"
"It's fine, James. Yes, I like fucking lasagna."
"Good. Yeah, great."
More silence.
James spoke up.
"You stole another of my hoodies"
"they're comfy."
"That's why I buy them. For me."
James' tone wasn't harsh, but it still made Regulus flinch when he emphasized his words.
For me.
"Sorry.."
"Oh- Wait- Reg, It doesn't matter, I'm just joking. It's fine."
"mhm. ok."
Regulus sat at the counter, scrolling through his phone. He wasn't even paying attention to his phone. He was paying attention to James' bare torso as he made dinner. Paying attention to James' body. Paying attention to James' V-line. Paying attention to-
STOP IT REGULUS.
Regulus bit his lip, and looked back down at his phone, trying not to get distracted.
"You okay?"
"Mhm I'm fine. I'm great, lovely, actually."
"ok..."
--------------------
"You play guitar?"
"Yeah?"
Regulus had been sitting on the couch, drinking a coffee, when James had sat on the floor in front of the couch, not right in front of Regulus, but close enough, with a guitar.
"Do you sing?"
"Mhm"
"Sing for me then"
James sighed. He took a moment making pointless little noises with the strings.
"What are you doing?"
"Tuning it, dumbass."
Regulus rolled his eyes, which were quickly on James when he started playing.
"I saw her in the rightest way
Looking like Anne Hathaway
Laughing while she hit her pen
And coughed, and coughed
And then, she came up to my knees
Begging, baby, would you please?
Do the things you said you'd do to me, to me"
James' voice was fucking amazing.
"Oh, won't you kiss me on the mouth and love me like a sailor?
And when you get a taste, can you tell me what's my flavor?
I don't believe in God, but I believe that you're my savior
My mom says that she's worried, but I'm covered in this favor
And when we're getting dirty, I forget all that is wrong
I sleep so I can see you 'cause I hate to wait so long
I sleep so I can see you and I hate to wait so long"
Regulus could listen to James forever.
"She took my fingers to her mouth
The kind of thing that makes you proud
That nothing else had ever
Worked out, worked out
And lately, I've tried other things
But nothing can capture the sting
Of the venom she's gonna spit out right now"
God.
"Oh, won't you kiss me on the mouth and love me like a sailor?
When you get a taste, can you tell me what's my flavor?
I don't believe in God, but I believe that you're my savior
I know that you've been worried, but you're dripping in my favor
And when we're getting dirty, I forget all that is wrong
I sleep so I can see you 'cause I hate to wait so long
I sleep so that I can see you and I hate to wait so long"
Regulus wanted to kiss James so bad.
"And we can run away to the walls inside your house
I can be the cat, baby, you can be the mouse
And we can laugh off things that we know nothing about
We can go forever until you wanna sit it out"
"Do you write songs?"
"Sometimes."
"Sing me one then."
James sighed. After a moment, started singing again.
___________________________
How did they end up kissing in James' room again?
Great question.
Regulus was on top of James, Legs wrapped around his waist.