Chapter 2
Regulus
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Regulus black had left town 1 year and 5 months ago to the day. He hadn't really known what else to do. When he had been called to identify his parents after the car accident, everything just felt wrong. All those emotions sweeping through him that he couldnt quite place. Pity maybe. Grim relief. It had only been a couple of days till his 18th birthday. That meant he could leave. And he did. But not into Sirius' waiting arms, whose eyes had watched him desperately from the other side of their parents casket, pleading for Regulus to come and be a part of the life Sirius had once abandoned him for. No, he refused to do that. Instead, he had gone to James. And they both know how that went.
Now all this time later, here he was. Back in the stupid little nightmare that he used to call home. He stood in the cold, damp and dark of the park, watching, waiting, hoping that James might show up. He saw the shadowed figure walking from the rusted iron gates and knew it was him just from the way he walked. He was taking slow tentative steps, eventually making it to the lamppost that Regulus had found himself under. "Hi" Said Regulus calmly. James just looked at him, surveying every inch of his body, fear, guilt, and something else Regulus didn't know filling his eyes. "You're here" he stated it nearly like a question. He looked at him like he was a ghost, like he should be dead "yes" Regulus tried to act coolly "I am".
James response was immediate and harsh "why?" Regulus let his glare harden "none of your fucking business potter" James stepped forward "well it clearly is since you called me and told me to come to a park at three in the fucking morning" Regulus stumbled back pathetically under James's imposing presence. James just sighed "where did you go?" Regulus crossed his arms "London". He hadn't enjoyed London, not like he'd expected to. It was loud and crushing and all he had gained now was a smoking habit. James's eyebrow shot up "really? all by yourself?" Regulus shook his head "Barty and Evan came with me".
James nodded like he had expected the answer. "That makes sense, I checked at theirs first when you dissappeared, they wouldn't tell me anything" his eyes were distant with recollection "then they were gone too" James hadn't been exactly close to Barty and Evan, but they had possibly known more about his true self than even Sirius. It would go weeks without them saying a word to the other, then hour long rants about anything as James sat with Regulus. they had been friends in some strange way. He had lost more than just Regulus, he had lost the only people who knew the real him.
Shut up, shut up, said Regulus' brain. Don't feel pity for this guy. He has plenty of other friends, he has Sirius. James doesn't care about you. But their was a nagging feeling in his head that by leaving regulus had made James's life so, so much worse. All he would have to do was look into James's eyes to know that was the absolute truth, so he kept his eyes glued to the floor.
James stepped closer "why... are you back?"
Regulus felt so pitiful under James's massive shadow. He tilted his head up with a smirk of fake confidence "maybe I have unfinished business" he suddenly grabbed James's face and kissed him. James's face went rigid, then he slowly returned the kiss, then he was shoving Regulus backwards. He tripped and fell into the grass "what the fuck was that for!" Regulus yelled, filling the empty park with echoes. He would have kept on yelling, but James was crying "now?" James voice was fresh with anguish "now you like me? Now it suits for you to associate with my kind? Do you know how fucking afraid I was, that you were going to tell the entire town I was a fag when I tried to kiss you that night? Do you!"
Regulus was so stunned he just shook his head vigorously. "Then you left! And it was my fault! I've been feeling guilty for so long, I've had to get Sirius out of so many messes, and it's all because of me he's in them in the first place! and he doesn't know, and where were you! FUCKING GONE!" There were tears in Regulus's eyes now too "I'm sorry" James didn't have to say a word for Reg to know that wasn't enough "I... I saw one of the videos of you lot playing at a bar" he started slowly "It made me want to come back, things are different now" James scoffed "bullshit".
Regulus could feel the hurt tears pouring before he could stop them "its not, I swear"
James turned, beginning to walk back towards the gates "you're a good liar Regulus" he smirked coldly "but you've told so many it doesn't matter if I believe you".
Remus
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Remus groaned at the sight of the sun streaming through the blinds. He blinked groggily and half rolled, half fell out of bed. He made his way to the small kitchen of the even smaller flat, the paint pealing and the cupboards sagging, with the intention of making some breakfast. He was supposed to be going out later with the gang, but the thought of clubbing actually made him sick. Therefor he was planning on spending as chilled out of a day as possible, hoping to god it would steel him enough for the lights, sounds and chaotically poured drinks. He made a mug of tea, and sat down on the sofa with his book. This would be a normal, easy chilled out day. The chilled out day immediately fell apart, however, when Lily Evans knocked so hard on his door it nearly fell off its hinges.
Lily was his oldest friend. They grew up on the same street and their parents had been close so they had been practically wedged together since birth. She was also his closest friend. They had stuck with eachother through everything, through the awkward phase when Lily had dated James, through two shared gay crisis, through one of Remus's worst times in his life, and lily was still here, and now their lives were perfect. Well... mostly. They were both still closeted, nevermind pining after their own band mates.
They had both loved music since they were really young, and it was always there dream to form a band. They had always thought they would play together, but things didn't work out that way sadly. Even still, the marauders was starting to take off, and Lily's band, the valkyries, were already on rocket fuel. And headed straight for the stars.
Now he was opening the door to Lily, who practically barrelled into the room and onto Remus's sofa. "Hi Lils" he smiled, joining her on the sofa, where she was practically beaming with delight "guess what?" She giggled "what?" She leaned in and whispered "we're going on tour!" Remus leapt up "oh my God!" Lily nodded vigorously "I know!" She jumped up and grabbed Remus' arms to spin him around "30 venues over two months!" Remus wrapped his arms tight around her "that's incredible Lily, I'm so happy for you" he let go "what do the others think?"
She dropped back down to the couch "they're ecstatic, Marlene's already bought a really expensive bottle of wine to celebrate, and-" she punched his arm "we're going out later" she had that look in her eye "you could comeeeee" she was so giddy with excitement remus wanted to laugh. He thought about the marauders, and how they were supposed to be going clubbing. But then he thought about how much he'd prefer to not see Sirius chatting up a girl he's going to finger in the bathroom. He turned to Lily "absolutely!" Her eyes widened "really? You never go clubbing"
He chuckled softly "I'm a whole new person"
Sirius
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Sirius read the text over and over.
Hi I'm really sorry, can't make it tonight, Lily has big news so I'm supposed to be hanging out with her tonight to celebrate, sorry again, we'll definitely go out soon
-sent from Remus
It's fine, he's just going out with a friend. Remus doesn't have any obligation to spend time with him. Oh, whoops, where did that calm attitude go when he threw the wine glass across the room? Sirius groaned, disappointment coursing through him. Is it normal to be this upset that you don't get to see your friend. Surely it is. I mean, he would be upset not to see James. Would he be cursing out Lily's name for taking James away for a night and chucking glasses though? Ehh, depends on his mood.
He stood, checking himself in the mirror, leather jacket, cropped shirt, red lip gloss. Sirius was determined not to let Remus get him down. Sirius could party without Remus. Sirius could party hard.
Two hours later Sirius found himself bathed in the thumping light of the dance floor. James was beside him, a drink clutched in his hand as he swayed wildly to the music. They screamed lyrics to songs, not really noticing when Peter decided to leave until they looked around and couldn't see him anymore. Faces shifted in the crowd, Sirius lost sight of James, but he was fine with that. Tonight was a celebration of all they'd achieved, and yet he didn't want to see any of them. Any of them except Remus.
A random girl walked up to him on the dance floor with that kind of look in her eye. She had sandy hair and blue eyes. Like moony, he thought in the haze of drink. Then they were kissing and he was trying desperately to ignore every part of her except her sandy hair, and he couldn't tell why.
He saw James again. Wait. When did the girl leave? Oh well, it doesn't matter. What was he talking about? Oh right, James. Yeah, James had just thrown a guy to the ground. The guy had clearly tried to put his hands down James's pants while he was too knocked out on drink to care, and hadn't forseen how strong James would be when he responsively lashed out. The man stood up "arsehole!"
James stood back, cowering like a child "I'm sorry r- I'm sorry" the man with black hair moved forward like he was about to hit James but Sirius intervened quickly, punching him so hard in the jaw that Sirius swore it cracked. Then suddenly it was anarchy. Two of the guys friends showed up and it was a mess of punches, kicks and blood. By the time the bouncer had thrown them out on their ears Sirius's lip was bleeding heavily and James had a black eye.
"Shit night eh James?" Sirius turned to James, but he was lying up against the wall of the club, his eyes glassy. Jesus, he'd had a lot to drink, how had Sirius not noticed? James had to take a lot to get him drunk and now he was totally pissed. He would have asked him what was up, but he could barely form cohesive thoughts of his own. So instead Sirius leaned out his arm to pull james up, nearly tripping as he did, then they began trailing down the street, not a sober step between them as they leaned on eachother. Like they always had.
Remus
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"This is actually really fun" Remus yelled above the music as he danced with Marlene "what? You thought it wouldn't be?" She laughed, spinning around "maybe" he smirked and once against lost himself in dancing. "Excuse me" Lily pushed Marlene playfully to the side "it's my turn for Remus" Marlene let out a groan "ughh, you never share him, we barely get to see our favourite boy" she swung her arm round Remus's shoulder "it's not my fault he joined the rockstar lifestyle too" Lily leaned in to Remus "always with his marauderssssss"
Marlene gasped in mock horror, letting go of Remus "traitor!" she turned to Lily "he's all yours... for now, we better see him before the end of the night" Lily sighed "fine, I guess" then they started dancing again, and Marlene went over to Dorcas and Mary.
"Speaking of your marauders" Lily began "do you think that they're upset you ditched them?" Remus scoffed "they probably didn't even notice" he looked down as lily rolled her eyes "not this again, I'm telling you sirius likes you!" Remus's eyes darted back up "I didn't say Sirius" Lily smirked "of course the others like you, but Sirius Like likes you" Remus blushed slightly "he doesn't, anyway we're not even discussing this until you sort out your feelings for a certain person beginning with 'm'" Lily laughed like remus had just said something outrageously funny "what? What are you talking about" she steadied herself and tried to put on a show of mock coolness "Oh, do you mean Marlene? Yeah she's fit as fuck" Remus laughed "you better not let dorcas hear that-" he loudly raised his voice "and I mean Mary!" Lily put her hands over her ears "la la la la lala can't hear you" Remus smiled "yep, we're hopeless"
They were neatly folded into a booth, perhaps one too many drinks in remus's system when Peter barged in. "Pete?" Remus spluttered in confusion " oh thank God, ive been searching this place for ages" Remus frowned "Peter, whats up" Peter looked at him sternly "what's wrong with Sirius?" Remus raised an eyebrow "James is acting wierd too, surely you must know something" remus didn't, and he told Peter as much "Well, i was in the club with them, and Sirius looked like he was on the cusp of a mental breakdown, and James drank so much in the one hour I stayed it's a miracle his liver hasn't failed yet" Remus's frown deepened and he stood up "I'm going to go find them" everyone looked shocked "what?" Dorcas asked "Re you don't even know if they're still at the club" he grabbed his coat "I'll find them anyway, I need to make sure they're okay" Peter nodded "I'm coming too" Remus smiled at that. Marlene stood "I'll come too, I'm usually pretty good at knowing what James is likely to do in any situation" she beamed proudly, though she nearly tripped over with the wine coursing through her.
Lily frowned "I'm not sure this is a good idea" Marlene put up a hand to silence her "au contraire sweet Lily, it's a great one"
James
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James wanted to forget all about everything. Regulus was playing through his mind like a drum, pounding his senses until he couldn't breathe. Poor Sirius, what would he think if he knew the truth, he'd probably slump him off his shoulder and let him crack his head on the street. He didn't know how long it had been since the club, they just kept on walking at their sluggish pace. This wasn't fair on Sirius, it was James's job to get him out of messes, not the other way around. He was barely registering their surroundings so it took him a few minutes for him to realise they were headed towards gryffindor diner, an old haunt of theirs, mainly bc it was an overnight place and they stayed up far too late. Sirius dropped him in a booth, and James was pretty sure he dozed off, because when he snapped back to focus their were voices talking.
"What happened? Is he okay?" He thought that was remus "oh so you don't care if I'm okay?" That was definitely Sirius, albeit a bit slurred "wait, what? Of course I care, what are you talking about, but look at James, he looks half dead". There was more that James couldn't quiet make out but he thought he also heard petes more rational voice joining the fray. He was nearly about to doze off but then he felt someone else slide into the booth. A soft hands with rings on it shook his shoulder gently and then stroked his hair. He turned around to see Marlene, smiling softly but with concern in her eyes. Behind her, the argument continued to rage. She touched his face tenderly and moved it back to focus on her "what's wrong? You don't normally do stuff like this" he immediately started crying and she pulled him tightly into a hug "hey, shh, it's okay" he violently sobbed into her shoulder, barely able to get out the words. But he did "Regulus" he whispered to her "he's back".