silver lining awaits (or not)
Park Jimin's story was one of misery.
It was said and done. There was nothing that could change it, as far the scriptures went back. There was nothing to support his maniac mind that spiralled every moment as he lived in the heart of the dark forest. There was nothing to help his aching, empty soul that craved for better, for more, for love.
Things that he could never have, despite all his immortal life spent, years gone and ones coming.
Jimin was bearing the brunt of a crime he hadn't committed. All he had done was be born in a family that didn't want him, born to ancestors that had wronged the lords and ladies alike, born for everyone to ridicule and curse as he watched them writhe in their death beds, years later. There was no way to change his fate, reverse the curse, kill the soul that has caused so much pain.
He was alive and dead at the same time.
A heart that bled inky black in thick rivulets hardly ever was alive.
Jimin had simply accepted it with a serenity that came with years of solitude. He could do nothing as he watched it decay, always surrounded by the stench of rot and decompose. It killed him to even look outside, the black and the greens that were so vile to stare at; the sky was putrid in its shades. Everything he wanted was unreachable for even going out of this cursed place would be a brandish on his reptile-like skin— one with red hot iron until his nerves were numb and dumb.
So, he existed. He didn't live, he merely existed. Not breathing, just staying. Staying until one day his magic would extinguish completely.
And then, perhaps his respite would come as he would lay on the bed that was prepared in Hell's fires, since the day he was born.
He was sick of going through the never ending cycle of each day, until they melded as one long day, in and out like tapes of a broken recorder. Tireless in each movement, a hamster on the wheel that kept spinning just like the ground underneath his feet. His world was limited and all of his energy was focussed on keeping this cursed magic alive within him.
For this thrumming and pulsating magic at the tip of his fingers were all he had left, all he was given as an inheritance, all he was as a being.
But the past few days had been different, a totally new change to the mundane of Jimin's life for there was a new element at play.
Jung Hoseok, a human.
Things hadn't drastically changed but for the first time Jimin had something to look forward to, someone to protect and care, someone who looked at him for who Jimin was and not the Raven, that had everyone fearing for their lives.
Hoseok was truly one of a kind, his kind, humans and Jimin would make sure this fragile yet firm human would never suffer, at least not under his watch. Hardly five days in and Jimin had experienced a type of warmth that you couldn't find in this bleak forest— after all, Jimin was thoroughly aware of every corner in here. He could and absolutely would bring heaven and earth together if it meant that this personal sunshine of his, would be safe and comfortable.
"Are you hungry?"
Jimin's soothing voice made it to Hoseok, who shook his head in response.
Jimin had been fretting all day, moving things from one place to another, removing the potions and arranging them back again, continuously muttering words of a dead language and cleaning his leather skin with some sort of stone— quite harshly, if Hoseok was honest, but the other didn't know that he was awake when Jimin did that.
Hoseok didn't exactly understand where it came from, that ticking energy in Jimin, but he was sure the screeching, blood-thirsty monsters outside weren't of much help either.
"Eat up anyways, I'm not sure how long this may take."
Jimin muttered, placing a hot steaming soupy rice dish in front of Hoseok.
Jimin got back to his task of "cleaning his skin" except if it were the real skin, it would've bled through the wood underneath. It would've sunk farther if the stone he used was used on human skin, but he wasn't human. He was the Raven, the feared, the cursed, and the ruthless. So all it did was sand the leather with marks that disappeared in seconds. His magic was strong after the potion that he had taken yesterday.
Hoseok took the wooden spoon and slowly ate the rice with blows of air to cool it down for he really wasn't keen on burning his tongue.
At least not yet.
It was absolutely delicious, considering the situation in which it was made. Hoseok was still clueless of how Jimin procured the items to make food in this deserted land of his. Perhaps his magic made room for all these needs of survival.
"It's okay."
Jimin's whispers to the little bird that had perched itself onto his shoulders were heard enough to grab Hoseok's attention.
There was a new cut on his reptile-like skin, irritated but not enough to bleed. The distress-filled chirps from the bird was spotted by Jimin's gentle hands, so unlike his dangerous self that commanded revered respect by all. His skin stitched itself up in minutes and with Jimin choosing to abandon his ritual in favours of the black bird, the stone was put away in a cupboard.
Hoseok took to the tiny corner of cottage where the water flowed to wash his vessels. It was only polite of him to be of use in a guest's home after having received food, shelter, and protection.
Protection from those unruly demonic spirits, waiting for a single weak link to breakthrough and ravish him, the human.
He hadn't exactly seen the demons outside, the ravaging eyes, the demonic horns, the blood-stained teeth, the extremely pointy nails, the ugliness of it all. He was sheltered from the view outside by the thick curtain put in place by Jimin. He had seen the shadows, lurking around with intent of killing and greed but he wouldn't dare to open that curtain.
Hoseok was fearless and that was to be taken as the truth. But he was still a power-less human and that made him vulnerable enough to be prey to those pounding beasts outside. He wasn't losing his life trying to be unafraid (foolish).
"You will need rest so lay your body down for the night."
Jimin muttered, eyes focussed on his own hands and the book cradled between them.
"And what about yours?"
Hoseok asked, sitting by the window, his favourite spot in this tiny house.
"I'm not human, I can manage a few days without sleep. Someone has to keep a lookout for them, after all."
Jimin had omitted the reason.
He couldn't sleep even if he wanted to, for his curse didn't let him sleep during the full moon week of this exact period. He hardly got a wink of sleep, soulless eyes glazing over with draining energy, but he would persevere like always. All he could do was lay his body and let his back rearrange itself for another gruelling day against those demons.
What kind of curse prevents you from resting on the same days he needs it the most?
It was messed up, this place was and he, above all, was the most messed up.
Hoseok hadn't yet caught on, or even if he did, he hadn't mentioned it to Jimin, urging him for a reason, an answer. Jimin wasn't mentally capable to divulge more, not today when he could feel his mood worsening already. He was pissed at the world that didn't care, angry at the gods that allowed such a curse to be brought to life, enraged at everything that made it worse for him to survive.
How very convenient of his family to let him go when he wasn't the one to bring this adversary on them!
"Not getting any sleep?"
Jimin asked, as he saw Hoseok blink up at the ceiling even after 30 minutes of trying and failing to sleep.
"No, just not tired enough, I think."
Hoseok replied, crawling to sit beside Jimin with a blanket wrapped around.
"Hm, want to pick up a book? Reading a book puts me down and by the time I've finished ten pages, I'm dreaming of the green grasses and blue skies, just like in here."
Jimin said, pointing to the illustration as Hoseok peeked in.
It was like those drawings and paintings he had seen in his younger brother's books. Doyung loved to replicate that on breads, using the juices of fruits and leaves to get the same colours, but it took too long and Hoseok had to get the orders done quickly, which meant it couldn't be entertained more than once a fortnight.
Strangely, he didn't miss baking, at least not yet.
Maybe because over the years, baking became more of a chore and a job than just a hobby on the side or just helping his father on the busy days. Baking had been his respite from the world outside that screamed for him to do better, it blocked it away as he would hum under his breath, kneading the doughs. But, with changing times, it had ruined that experience too.
"Would love to, but another time. My head's hurting and words make it worse."
Hoseok could hear a whine in his own voice and he really couldn't be blamed because everyone knew how his headaches usually evolved to something more vicious, until he needed 3 days of bed rest in a dark room. But, Jimin didn't know that. Of course, he didn't.
Who even tells that to a stranger?
Hoseok second-guessed himself as JImin kept his book side with a twig in the page to make his read pages and stood up with his leather grating against the cottage's floor. He slowly walked away, steps deliberate and one foot after the other. After the sounds of rummaging ceased to exist, he came back with a small heavy sack and another sturdier cloth.
"Put this on, it'll help."
"I don't k—"
Before Hoseok could get through, Jimin crouched down to his level, eyes staring into Hoseok's as he covered the sturdier one over his ears in some sort of scarf-like accessory. Suddenly, the noise reduced by a hundred as it blocked the murderous sounds outside. Then, the sack was placed on Hoseok's head with gentler hands than what could ever be expected by the Raven.
It was a heated stone sack to help relieve pain—the old healer style.
As Jimin looked on for a few more seconds, Hoseok felt like time stopped. Up this close, he could see Jimin's uncovered face that was almost translucent and bare, yet so beautiful. The scales and ridges on the leather skin of his faded into oblivion as Hoseok could see the man for who he was.
Magnificently beautiful, just like the Gods intended.
"What is your village like? You haven't spoken about it much and I haven't been there, so humour me."
Jimin questioned, sitting back with his book.
"It's nothing special. There's a town head, a seemingly kind old man, the town square since the start of time, a storage structure that was built with the transition to better instruments and equipment for the village. More than half of the people are in farming or herding or animal rearing. We have the usual blacksmiths and tailors and soldiers and intellects, though the latter are considered more crazy than genius."
"What about your home?"
Hoseok had no concrete answer. It was the same old, parents who were parenting in the way they knew, not unkind in their ways. Just not nurturing in the same way like the soil underneath helped the sapling grow stronger each day. He was okay with it, after all what could be even do, they were gone and he was left with a stable business and loyal customers to tend to.
Luckily enough, Jimin was forced to drop the topic as the gush of water loudly echoed. The rippling waves crashed against the sides of the tiny hut. The floods had begun and hell would soon be unleashed until the water levels receded. The moon up high was only a perpetuator in this mess of destruction leaving Jimin all alone.
Jimin had no one to fall back onto, he never did and likely, never will.
But for once, there was someone whose presence motivated him to keep his spirits high, who needed to get back to the human world and Jimin had to make sure that this cottage would stand strong through it.
And Hoseok just knew that he had to wait it out, patient and calm.
Given how Jimin was still sat beside him without a rush to renew spells, Hoseok only assumed that closing his eyes for a little while wouldn't be of harm. Especially with Jimin's mere presence that brought out a seren so opposed to what the Raven was. And the warm sack of stones didn't help as the lull in his breaths got deeper and his head rolled to rest against Jimin's shoulders.
It was one of the best sleep he had in months and he could only reason it out to the vivid dream of Jimin grazing his black nails against Hoseok's soft scalp in soothing motions, akin to his mother's movements when he was a babe against her bosom.
(What Hoseok didn't see as sleep took over his senses, was how tenderly Jimin stared at him, how softly he wrapped the falling blanket on him, how carefully he maintained his posture to make sure that Hoseok wasn't awoken by any jerks.
Jimin was unknowingly growing fonder with the human and that was just a heartbreak waiting to happen, a failed attempt filled with breaking hearts and late-night wishes on shooting stars, a worse life to lead knowing that he'll never get what his heart wishes for.
Sorrow at its finest.)
"Good morning!"
Jimin's voice cheerily came through, albeit frantic in its undertones.
Hoseok had just woken up to the barest of sunlight peeking through the shut-off windows. The little raven, now named as Kila by Jimin after some passage he had read two days ago, was resting on his chest, eyes staring at Hoseok. He simply pet it, moving it to his lap as he looked around to find Jimin in front of the cauldron, nervously muttering words, unrecognisable to his ear.
"I'm sorry it's taking so long, but we have a lot of work to do if you wish to get back home soon."
Jimin started off, his aura having changed overnight.
There were hints of that dark energy in his eyes, black smoke and uncatchable sparkles in each of his hand's swipes as he summoned magic, scales that stood guarded, waiting for the inevitable danger and skin turning darker with the leather polished to perfection.
But, there was this twinkle in his eyes, the faintest glimmers of a smile, the nervous twitch in his fingers, the stumbling feet as he rushed and an overall change in the beats of a non-existent heart, long dead and gone. Jimin had changed by the slightest, just enough for Hoseok— who had noticed every move of his for the past week— to notice, just the bare minimum but a progress nonetheless.
"What can I do to help?"
Hoseok offered, as he removed the study cloth that had muffled the noise.
Only to be hit by the loudness, increased ten fold.
Jimin moved to wrap it back on, just as he caught a glimpse of Hoseok's wide eyes at the noise. His hands tightly gripped on Hoseok's to guide it back on his head, careful of his hair that was wild after the nap.
"Don't remove this until I say so, it's bad out there and I don't want you scared and faint now."
Hoseok nodded, wide eyes focussed entirely on Jimin. There was something enchanting in how Jimin moved, in the way his mouth moved, in everything he did and Hoseok was slowly coming to the realisation that he was utterly down to whatever this was— the growing affection in his heart.
"We need to start blocking the doorways soon. The water will seep in soon, but this might help slow it down."
Jimin explained, clearing his throat and his foot against on the go, away from Hoseok.
That broke the moment between them, as Jimin gathered the fabrics and hay mixture to plaster it against the nooks of the walls. Moving like two hands of a clock, in what seemed like practised synchronisation (except they hadn't) the two of them kept filling it all in. The ceiling upward needed the same treatment and Jimin took to it.
Hoseok kept glancing to make sure that Jimin wouldn't hurt himself. It was silly to think of it that way, especially when the other was a ferocious cursed being who could summon magic on a whim. He couldn't even get hurt from a fall, as the flowing magic in his veins would correct the damage. But Hoseok's stupid little heart didn't entertain any idea of the other being hurt by the slightest.
It wasn't that he refused to fully believe Jimin was invincicble, but rather just didn't want his beliefs challenged at the expense of Jimin.
"Do we have more of this?"
Hoseok asked, as his mixture was empty after finishing all the cracks against the wall.
"Yeah, I'll get it for you."
Jimin said, as he came down from the step-ladder to help fetch it.
"Just tell me, it'll be a hassle for you otherwise."
Hoseok suggested softly.
And just like Hoseok had wished for it not to happen, Jimin slipped by a step and Hoseok moved to support his back before he could even think. His hands were firm against Jimin's rough, scaled skin and after a minute of clarity, he realised that in this exact position he could see Jimin's entire face in such detail like never before.
From the bloody red eyes that were slowly fading to the blackish red after the scare, the long, beautiful eyelashes that had no business on a demon, the pale plump lips that were caught in between Jimin's fangs and the pellucid skin that made for the bluish-black veins underneath, Hoseok was spellbound.
Jimin's usual narrowed eyes with the look of a siren that waited to pounce on a prey was exchanged with an almost wide-eyed, wistful, innocent look of shock, all too momentarily but cherished just the same by Hoseok.
"Are you okay?"
Hoseok whispered, getting a nod and a tiny sigh that was felt cold on his skin.
Jimin ran cold, his breath chillier than the nights. The icicle in his anatomy having never thawed since the years of his cursed existence. And for once, Hoseok believed that this was better than the furnace within himself, the human temperature. It was a perfect clash of the worlds they came from.
Jimin leaned in just a little closer and all Hoseok could think of was how any more closer would have their lips meeting. But in the next second, Jimin was stretching back, gaining the needed momentum to stabilize himself. Hoseok let go reluctantly, though his fingers could still feel the ridged patterns on the other's back.
Hoseok had never experienced this rollercoaster of emotions, not even with his rumoured bride to-be back in the village. It was an arrangement at the end of the day and no one was entitled to it.
His face heated up and he could feel his ears redden as he scurried away. There were thoughts in his head, ones that weren't exactly worthy of that place. Images— happy and ruined, barely present yet all consuming. Hoseok turned away hoping that they would vanish. But alas, they struck like burr on the cloth wrapped around his waist. Greedy enough to stay and make Hoseok shamefully acknowledge their presence— a secret in itself, a hush topic, and one which had Jimin's eyes all over him.
And when he laid to rest that day with the night shadowing and a heartbeat rivalling that of a rabbit, he thought back to Jimin's question of his home.
He had no answer yesterday, clueless as to what fit his description of a home.
But Hoseok knew very well that the home he wanted and lived in was no longer there.
Hoseok loved 'love'. Everything about it was so wonderful and beautiful. To love was a gift and he was a miraculous worker in spreading love. He loved the sunny days, just like how he loved the windy ones. He loved the pleasant greetings in the morning, just like how he loved the quiet hugs. He loved it all, even the in-betweens of it all. Something precious bloomed in him each time he loved.
And his home back in the village, was devoid of it. Not entirely, for his family wasn't cruel. The love he knew was all too practical, machines moving relentlessly until one day, the engine would stop untimely. It wasn't what he dreamed of, for that revered love he envisioned was one that crossed boundaries set, one that was subtle and caring, unafraid of pointing fingers, reveling in the life given.
He couldn't be guaranteed of that love anywhere on this planet, not on set stone with nails hammered against the wood. But there were instances of it, tales old as time, souls intertwined forever and lives bound to each other till the end of time.
So, he was willing to try. Even if he was unsure of its outcomes, he had faith in the beyond.
And perhaps, it was time enough for him to move past his familial home, not out of disrespect, but maybe the space to grow could open unknown channels.
Maybe this wild, free spirit of his was the reason his parents had punished him. His inquisitive nature, the ever-questioning, curious brain of his thrived on the unknown and out-of-the-normal. He had been the odd one out of the bunch, and all his parents knew was to discipline it out of him. They hadn't been successful, he realised as the past week had unlocked that part of him where he was just Hoseok.
That Hoseok who could soar past the clouds and into heavens unseen. He was all that and no one could shut it in him now.
His answer was clear now.
His home was surprisingly here, with Jimin by his side.
Even if he wasn't sure that Jimin felt the same way about him.
A ridiculous and hasty claim, a sane-minded person would likely say.
But Hoseok didn't care. He very well, knew that this was quick, even for a person like him. It was quick to crush on another, to fall in love, to abandon any resemblance of his previous life, to commit himself with no means of knowing if the other felt the same, to be willing to give it up to spend another day with him.
It was too quick, just a week in.
It was too quick to fall for a monster, none the wiser.
Jimin was a cursed being, incapable of joy and happiness, incapable of memories pertaining to the warmth of sunshine and the scent of ocean breezes, incapable of everything human. It wasn't his fault, but people didn't care, no one had and no one would.
Except Hoseok. For he had spent eight days in here and he had never seen a being so wonderful, despite everything.
"The floods are receding slowly, perhaps by tomorrow morning you can pack and leave, though the water might be a hindrance."
Jimin mentioned as Hoseok was served with a bowl of congee.
The Raven had spent the better part of the morning, strengthening his magic and spells that kept the loathsome demons away, but water wasn't something he could control, which was the main reason for all the plastering yesterday. It was said to be the peak of monsters clawing their way in today and then by the time midnight would strike, they would be gone until the next time.
Hoseok simply sipped on the mildly salted rice water as he stared at Kila who was seemingly more restless than ever. He hadn't yet addressed all he had felt the day before, it just didn't seem like an appropriate time to tell it, especially when Jimin was fretting with eyes redder than ever.
He would do so tomorrow, perhaps ask the Raven, if there was a space for a human like him in his home and maybe, his life. Until then, he would keep up whatever Jimin thought of him.
Jimin sat down by the corner for just a bit as tremors ran their course through his body. This time was different with a human soul to protect and that meant the magic utilised was higher. He would have to make it last until midnight at the very least. His powers were draining and he could feel it the zap of his own hand.
Taking a breath in, Jimin got up to put on his cloak. He was feeling colder than usual, a bad sign with how it was going. The cloak was one made with the finest cashmere by his grandfather during his expedition to a faraway land, the only heirloom received of importance. Jimin cherished it beyond words for it made him feel like a five year old once again, looking up at his grandfather's marked wrinkles and warm smile.
Jimin shook his head, going to collect the last of his supplies which included all kinds of stuff needed to ward off spirits, petals of a golden marigold to tail of mountain goat to blood of a sea orca to teardrops of a seven-limbed spider. All combined with his learnt literature in the dead language of ghosts and witches would work their magic.
Or it had been so in the past.
"Would you like for me to nurse a flame to provide some heat?"
Hoseok asked, as he watched Jimin clutch the cloak closer towards his ruined body. He had thought of providing the warmth of a hug, a better alternative but second guessed himself afraid of being too wanting.
"It would—"
"Jimin!"
It was so sudden. One moment, Jimin was asking something, in the middle of a sentence, a syllable rolling off his tongue and the next he was howling in pain with legs buckling underneath him. His knees hit the ground hard enough to make a noise of its own, but the scream of pain was enough indicator that things had gone south.
A better indicator came when Jimin's whimpers of hurt was drowned by the creepy shouts from the blood-hungry demons and the water gushing down as the flood levels rose. It broke through the plastered cracks, feet instantly engulfed by the water.
Hoseok didn't waste any time, waddling in seconds to reach Jimin and cradle his body. He didn't fear for his life more than he feared for Jimin's. Holding him up with arms tightly wound against the back, Hoseok helped him reach a corner, but it was too late for they had arrived inside the Raven's humble abode.
The spells of protection had broken and with Jimin on his knees, there was no way of renewing the powers lost, especially not with them barging in.
Hoseok couldn't fight those monsters that looked on with slime and dirt on their wretched skins. He had no powers, no tools, no weapons, nothing at all to work away but an injured Jimin meant he would have to find ways.
"Don't close your eyes, okay?"
Hoseok's frantic yells to Jimin who was almost dead on his feet were met with no response.
Hoseok used a stick to keep those uninvited limbs from entering his corner, he pushed them away with all his might and all of a sudden, the monsters fell back on their knees and butts. Hoseok turned his back to Jimin's wide open eyes were redder than any blood he had seen, colder than anything he had experienced, and there was a resemblance of a ward that protected him and the bird who were huddled beside Jimin.
"You are okay? Oh my, I was so scared."
Hoseok said, water rippling as he turned to hug Jimin tightly.
His fear of losing Jimin was more than the nerves of whatever he was feeling emotionally. Jimin's arm weakly came up to cradle his head against his own neck in comfort, his nose lightly twitching against Hoseok's hair. There was just a mere minute of bliss before they were aware of snarling beasts and their own drenched bodies.
"What do you want me to do?"
Hoseok asked, firm as he held his head higher.
"Get...those potions."
Jimin muttered, pointing to the swirling purple liquid.
Hoseok moved quick, dodging any attacks with his deer-like fast reflexes and got hold of the potions. Jimin, on the other hand, was using his last remaining powers to fight against the monsters. Back turned to help Jimin drink the potion, the apparatus against Jimin's lips, Hoseok made sure to keep an eye on Kila who had flown out.
Just as the last drop was consumed with a twisted face, Hoseok was met with a yell of 'Look out, Hoseok-ah' from the Jimin and in the next second there was a powerful jot of hot energy emanating from the Raven. The light was blinding and extremely volatile. And before Hoseok could feel the grimey hands of the demon behind him, it had vanished to dust. And so did every other demon in the cottage, pure dust that fell to the ground, amounting to nothing. Vanished in seconds, as the water pushed through carrying it out.
Jimin had done that.
But that wasn't of Hoseok's concern as he saw Jimin's failing body fall on the ground dramatically, a fall far worse than before and a concrete chance that looked bad.
Hoseok rushed to the floor, knees sliding and splashing against it as his hands grappled to hold the Raven up, but it was all dead weight. There was no sign of life. No breathing, no response to the nudges, nothing at all. Jimin's hands flailed helplessly against his sides and all the glory of the ravenous beast of the dark forest had gone out with him.
"Wake up. Just open your eyes, please. Just wake up."
Hoseok's pleas were met with silence, a eerie silence mostly found in graveyards.
Jimin, the oh so great Raven, was dead.