oh what tangled webs we weave
“...and I’m sure Ron will have some dates to schedule now,” Hermes said, a little more mulishly than it really deserved. The thought of them together still left a sour taste on his tongue.
Hattie, who had been staring out of the window like she’d like to fly out of it as Hermes discussed studying times, whirled around at this. She leaned towards him, thunking her arms down on the library table.
“Ron’s dating someone?” she said, astonished. “No, wait, don’t tell me—”
“It’s Seamus. You saw them snogging at the party. We were all there,” he said dryly.
“I didn’t think it was an actual thing, just a snog,” she trailed off, eyes widening. “...oh, they’re going to cause so many fires. We’re going to have to bail them out of prison at some point.”
“Wait,” she continued, holding up her hand before Hermes could say anything. “Wait wait wait. Are you telling me that Dean is dating Ginny and Seamus is dating Ron? They both went and started dating the two Weasley girls in the room instead of each other? Why the hell would they do that?”
“That’s not even the worst part,” Hermes said, leaning forward and gripping her by the arms, glad to know someone else understood the sheer madness of what was going on. “Not the worst part by half. I know for a fact that Dean thinks Ron is attractive, and she and Seamus both have that loudmouth, rough-around-the-edges thing going on. So I’m pretty sure that he’s dating Ginny just because she’s kind of like Ron, and part of the reason he likes Ron is that she’s like Seamus. Seamus, who is dating Ron.”
“Merlin and Morgana,” Hattie breathed, wide-eyed and overwhelmed. He let go of her.
For a moment they just looked at each other. All of their arguments about the potions book or anything else fell away, just then, as they both shared in the mutual horror of witnessing this trainwreck waiting to happen.
“This is going to go so badly,” she said, half-admiring and half-despairing. “Do you think we can convince Ron and Ginny to just dump the boys?”
“...I doubt it.”
“Hm.” Hattie let her hand drift down to her wand as she contemplated the options. “How about I make him think I’m as crazy as the Prophet says, then he starts calling me crazy, then Ron punches him for me and dumps him?”
“That’d require convincing other people you’re crazy, too, and also wouldn’t solve Dean and Ginny.”
She shrugged. “Dean and Ginny I’m less concerned about, he’s usually pretty mild-mannered.” Hermes was quite sure she was lying, but wasn’t going to say that to her face. “Dating Ginny instead of Ron—or even better, Seamus— is stupid, but Ginny will catch on.”
“And Ron wouldn’t?” he asked, a bit offended on her behalf.
Hattie favored him with a look that said he was being dense. It wasn’t one he was used to, so it shut him up quickly.
“Ginny has options and knows it. Ron…” she hesitated. “Ron also has options, but she wouldn’t believe me if I said so. She must have said things to you, too.”
Hermes frowned. There had been a good few occasions where she had said or done something that suggested she didn’t think people would like her. There had been that time last year when she had handed an unnamed Valentine over to Hattie when it was delivered to her. Ron had laughed it off. Hattie hadn’t, but had accepted the card anyway.
“So even if she doesn’t like him much, she’ll still take it,” he concluded for her.
She pursed her lips. “‘Fraid so.”
He let his head fall on a propped up arm, staring down at the grain of the table. “We’ll just have to wait this out, then?”
Her sigh was answer enough.