6 years
It had been 6 years since Sirius Black packed his most beloved belongings and fled his parent's home, making sure to tuck the torn rabbit his little brother had lovingly placed on his pillow the previous night.
-
“What's this for Reg?” Sirius had asked, a hint of fondness in his tone. Regulus had answered as though it was obvious.
“To keep you safe, duh.”
The ten-year-old said it with such conviction that Sirius almost missed the meaning. To keep him safe? Surely he didn’t mean-
“From Maman, you said she made your eye hurt.”
Shit, Sirius had let it slip to his baby brother the night before that the shiner he now sported on his right eye was the product of one too many smart remarks at the dinner table.
Unwilling to subject his brother to the tears gathering on his eyelashes, Sirius had gently coaxed Regulus off of his bed, letting his tears fall after he heard his sibling's socked feet tiptoe down the hallway to his room.
-
The first months after his escape to James’ house seemed to go by in slow motion. Living with the Potters felt to Sirius like living in a foreign country, a new culture, a new language. Praises were given without a thought, touches from Effie were filled with love, not malice, and every constant Sirius had known, good and bad, had vanished.
The only traces of home that remained stayed safely stowed underneath his pillow, a tattered old rabbit and a promise from his brother to keep him safe.
-
Half a decade later, Sirius continued to sleep with that battered bunny under his pillow, a silent prayer to his little brother, nearly the age Sirius was when he ran, to find him again. ‘
Sirius had moved out of the Potter’s shortly after his 20th birthday, moving in with his boyfriend, Remus Lupin. Sirius had met Remus shortly after his escape from Grimmauld Place and fell in love with him almost immediately. At 22, Remus ran his late mother's bookstore, and Sirius worked part-time at a coffee shop. Technically, both Sirius and James had enough money to never work again, but the mundane life of unemployment never called to either of the boys.
-
On the anniversary of his escape from his parent’s home, Sirius lay in bed next to Remus, whose soft snores filled the small apartment, and clutched his raggedy rabbit. The toy had become threadbare from the years Sirius spent clutching the small plush, dreaming of a brother who no longer existed.
Remus often held Sirius late at night, straining his ears to hear his lover’s whispered confessions of guilt over his brother, the brother he left in that awful house. Remus, ever the voice of reason, always assured him that his leaving saved his life, and his brother should never resent him for that.
Now, 6 years after his quiet retreat from the house of horrors, Sirius tossed and turned in his soft sheets, his inner turmoil quickly interrupted by a sharp knock coming from the front door. Bleary-eyed and confused, Sirius stumbled to the entryway of his apartment. Upon opening the door, he was met with an unimaginable sight: Regulus.
His baby brother, drenched from the rain and shaking from the cold, stood timidly in front of him, tears running down his face almost indistinguishable from the rainwater falling steadily out of his hair. He was taller now, with no baby fat stubbornly clinging to his face, which was now gaunt and covered in jagged cuts and bruising. His eyes no longer held a childlike joy to them, and the subtle blue hue had faded to a dull grey.
Oh, Sirius thought, he grew up.
A sudden motion startled him from his thoughts, Regulus had apparently broken out of his stupor and fallen to his knees in front of his brother.
“I’m sorry Sirius I-” He began, his voice a shrill, scratchy thing, nearly drowned out by the roaring storm.
“I didn’t know, I mean, I couldn’t think of anywhere else to-” He cut himself off again, sharp sobs rattling his frame. Sirius dropped down to his level and slowly cradled his battered face.
“Regulus” He whispered, tears filling his eyes
“My Regulus, I missed you”
And suddenly, like the strings that were holding him up had been cut, Regulus collapsed into his arms, shaking like a leaf with tears soaking into Sirius’s nightshirt.
For what seemed like hours, Sirius kneeled on the hardwood floor of his home, holding his trembling little brother as he broke, not ready to ask what had led up to his escape from their parents. Despite this, he couldn’t help but let his mind wander. How long had they been hurting his brother? How long had he wanted to escape? Did he hate Sirius? Would their parents come after him? His racing mind was once again interrupted by a flinch. Regulus, who was just beginning to halt his harsh sobbing, had just jolted in Sirius’s arms, looking fearfully behind him to Remus, who had quietly entered the room without Sirius’s knowledge and was now leaning on the kitchen table, a nervous look on his face.
“Reg” Sirius whispered
“Reg it's alright, that's just Remus. You remember Remus, yeah? It’s alright”
Remus cut him off,
“Sirius, why don’t you two get off the floor? I can put a pot on alright?”
Just then, Regulus jumped out of Sirius’s tight hold and stumbled into a standing position, his posture tense, almost waiting for something and staring at Remus with poorly concealed terror. Sirius could tell by his wince that it wasn’t just his face that was hurt, the poor kid. Before Sirius could even stand, Regulus began uttering apologies.
“Sorry, Remus I didn’t mean to- I mean I did but, I didn’t know that Sirius had company and I won’t be here long I just-”
“Regulus, wait” Remus tried to interrupt, but there was no stopping Regulus now.
“I just needed a place to stay for a few days, until I can find somewhere safe, I just can’t go back home.”
He sounded properly frightened now, and his apologies turned to pleas.
“Please don’t send me back, they’ll kill me if you send me back I swear it. I can’t go back Sirius, Remus please.”
“Regulus,” Remus said more firmly now, putting a stop to his pleading,
“You’re perfectly welcome to stay as long as you need, kid, Sirius and I have been waiting for you to come home.”
With that, Regulus seemed to calm, his shoulders slumping and breathing evening out.
“Really?” He breathed out
“Of course baby,” Sirius said, finally out of his stupor and standing close behind Regulus. He looked so fragile like this, so young, and Sirius couldn’t help the sinking feeling that he might collapse at any moment.
“Okay” Said Regulus, twisting his hands together.
“Okay, um, well do you have chamomile?”
Remus raised his eyebrows, surprised, and a delighted smile followed.
“Yeah kid”, he chuckled, “Yeah we’ve got chamomile”