Chapter 4
Blinking her eyes a few times and then rubbing them did not make the sight of Hope go away. In fact, every time she blinked the raven haired woman got closer to the table and by the time she was done rubbing her eyes Kelley estimated she had one minute to compose herself.
Quickly gathering the last round of shots Sam had just purchased, Kelley poured them into a glass and turned towards her friends, "Sorry guys I'm not drunk enough for this," she muttered.
Tilting her head back and closing her eyes, she allowed the liquid courage to slide down her throat and slammed the glass back down grimacing.
Her eyes remained unopened but she knew Hope was now standing right next to her. Kelley could recognize the perfume from a mile away, a mixture of warm honey and vanilla.
It was the scent that used to lull her to bed as her head rested on the keeper's chest, Hope's heart beat became her lullaby.
It was the scent that could wake her up from the deepest of sleeps, as Hope would kiss her freckles one by one playing connect the dots.
But it was also the scent that haunted her after their break, washing her laundry four times and yet Kelley swore the smell still lingered on her sheets.
*Flashback- April 2nd, 2012 Japan*
"O'Hara what are you doing?" Hope questioned her newly assigned roommate as she looked up from her book.
It was raining outside their hotel and being cooped in a hotel was not an ideal situation for someone with so much energy. Crossword puzzles, movies, even coloring couldn't suppress the boredom that had manifested itself inside Kelley's small body.
It didn't help that in her personal opinion Hope was the most boring roommate to have. "All she ever does is read and study her notes" she complained earlier to Alex who had lucked out on the roommate assignment and scored Syd.
Slowly turning around Kelley looked at Hope, "Oh nothing," she innocently smiled as she pulled on the keeper's oversized cardigan.
Hope clenched her jaw, "if you consider going through my luggage "nothing" then you have a strange definition for that word. Now are you going to explain yourself or what?"
Kelley could tell Hope was trying to intimidate her and started laughing. The "big and scary" goalkeeper act no longer worked on the young defender who quickly learned that deep down inside Hope was big softy.
"What's so funny O'Hara?" Hope asked growing frustrated which just caused Kelley to laugh even harder.
Hope watched as Kelley sat on the ground trying to compose herself, she looked like a small child swimming in Hope's sweater. Hope couldn't help but notice how pretty, no beautiful, the girl was. Her hair was pulled into a wild bun hair sticking out everywhere, her eyes grew bright with laughter and her smile was contagious. But what caught Hope's attention the most was the freckles that were splashed across Kelley's face. They were like perfectly placed imperfections scattered like stars in the night sky.
Finally able to control herself Kelley realized that Hope was staring at her smiling.
"What do I have something on my face?" Kelley questioned as she wiped at her cheeks with the sleeves of the sweater.
Hope laughed as she pushed the thoughts out her head. "No, well yes but no. Why haven't I ever noticed your freckles squirrel?," she chuckled.
"What do you mean you haven't noticed my freckles? They're literally permanent stains on my skin. Whats so special about them today that you finally notice them? And who says you can call me squirrel? That nickname is a privilege only allowed for people who deserve to use it," Kelley sassed.
"Being your roommate makes me more than deserving enough to call you squirrel, trust me. And I will tell you whats so special about them if you tell me why you were going through my things...Squirrel," Hope teased the defender.
Getting off the floor, Kelley climbed up onto Hope's bed taking the open spot next to her. She studied Hope carefully to make sure it was okay and relaxed when the keeper moved over and handed her an extra pillow to lean against.
"Okay O'Hara spill,' Hope said as she poked Kelley's side. She watched as Kelley took the extra pillow and used it to cover her face before mumbling her answer. "Kelley I can't hear you now move that pillow from out of your face and repeat what you just said," she demanded.
But Kelley just shook her head and firmly held the pillow in place too embarrassed to move it.
"Fine then we'll do this the hard way," Hope warned.
Before Kelley could even question what she meant, Hope was straddling her hips and tickling her sides. Kelley squealed in laughter and let go of the pillow allowing Hope to grab it and throw it to the other bed.
"Now will you tell me what you said?" Hope asked raising an eyebrow.
"I said I like the smell of your perfume. So I wanted to find out what kind you use but didn't want to bother you by asking," Kelley confessed as her cheeks grew red from embarrassment. Her heart was racing as she stared up at the older woman sitting on top of her. They locked eyes as a smirk came across Hope's face and her eyes grew dark.
"Oh you do, do you?" Hope teased as she leaned down placing her hands on either side of Kelley's head. She placed her mouth next to Kelley's ear and whispered, "would you like to know whats so special about those freckles now?"
Not being able to respond all Kelley could do was nod her head yes. Hope's perfume overwhelmed her the closer she got and the slight brush of her lips against her ear sent a shiver down her spine.
Leaning in closer Hope continued, "I think they're hot."
"TEAM MEETING IN 10!"
A voice yelled as someone pounded on the door causing Hope to jump. She quickly rolled off of the small defender and grabbed her things. Before heading out the door she looked back at Kelley who was frozen on the bed.
"Pull yourself together O'Hara, you don't want to be late," she smirked at the younger woman before heading out the door.
Jumping as Sam kicked her shin underneath the table, Kelley opened her eyes and forced a smile, "Well isn't this a pleasant surprise?"
Hope could tell Kelley was drunk as her speech slurred and knew if she wanted this situation to end well she would have to choose her words wisely. But the sight of another woman's arm wrapped around Kelley, their thighs brushing together made Hope feel sick. She swallowed the bitter taste that crept it's way into her mouth and shot a quick glare at the tan woman next to Kelley.
"Can we talk Kell?" Hope asked as she returned her eyes back to Kelley. "Please," she pleaded.
She wasn't sure if it was due to the alcohol coursing its way through her veins, the sound of Hope's voice as she spoke that last word, or the look on her face both vulnerable and unguarded regardless Kelley agreed. She shook her head and excused herself from the table. She glanced at her teammates and then turned toward Melanie offering an "I'm sorry" sort of smile before she grabbed Hope's hand and guided her toward a different table.
Shocked at how easy it was to convince her Hope's mind went blank as they sat down. She had rehearsed over and over again in the car ride here. She went through every scenario possible ranging from the good to the bad but as she opened her mouth to speak nothing came out. She looked like a fish out of water, gasping for air and quite frankly that was exactly how she felt as she stared into Kelley's hazel eyes.
"We can't keep doing this Hope. Its just not fair," Kelley sighed.
She had a small sad smile across her face and Hope could feel the heaviness in the words as Kelley's voice trembled.
"But we can't end things this way either," Hope whispered as she looked down at that hand that was still holding on so tightly to Kelley's.
A small laugh escaped Kelley, "But Hope everything ended a while ago when you chose him over me. You chose to end things then and anything that has happened in between now and when you said "I do", well that was me being in denial. But what happened after the world cup, you left before the sun even could even peak its way through, before it could warm the place that you abandoned," Kelley felt herself losing her strength as tears began to form in her eyes.
She swallowed hard and took a deep breath before continuing. "I just can't keep being your second choice Hope, I need to move on."
A single tear escaped from Hope's eyes and slowly rolled down her cheek before she wiped it away. She knew Kelley was right even if it pained her to admit it. In the past she was her second choice but it wasn't like that anymore. It may have take Hope 3 years and a broken marriage to realize this but no matter what she loved Kelley and never stopped loving her after all of this time.
She loved the way her hair looked in the morning, fly aways galore framed her face as she would yawn and stretch before sheepishly asking for breakfast in bed.
She loved how she pouted after losing a card game or a bet. She would sit quietly, sighing every once in a while until Hope caved in and promised to play again.
She loved when Kelley and her would get into tiny arguments. Kelley's Irish temper flaring as swear words flew out from her mouth.
But what she loved most was watching her sleep. She would spend hours counting and memorizing her freckles never knowing when or if she would be able to see them again.
"Please Kell, just come home with me. One night is all I ask from you even if I don't deserve it and tomorrow I will bring you right to the airport for your flight," Hope begged.
Taking a moment to think, Kelley sat back in her chair and removed her hand from the keeper's grasp. She wanted to say no, she wanted to be angry at Hope for even asking. But no matter how hard she tried she couldn't. She could never say no to her.
"Okay, one night," she shook her head as she spoke.
She gathered her things and told Sam and Caitlin she was leaving with Hope and mumbled a quick goodbye to Melanie. They gave her a concerned look but let her go after she promised everything was okay.
"You ready Kell?" Hope asked placing a hand on the girl's shoulder.
Kelley nodded unable to speak and slowly started to regret her decision with every step she took out of the airport.