Chapter 1
Kelley leaned her head against the cold damp window of the bus and let out a sigh of relief. The game was finally over and she couldn't be more disappointed in her performance. She looked like an idiot out there; her one shot on goal and she practically kicked the ball into Hope's hands.
She watched as her teammates climbed onto the bus hoping that neither Sam or Caitlin would sit with her; the last thing she wanted to do at this moment was pretend to be in a good mood and joke around. Letting out another sigh, this time one of relief, Christie sat down in the seat next to her. The older woman gently took Kelley's hand into her own and squeezed it before letting go, reassuring her in more ways than one. Cap was well aware that Kelley was disappointed with the game but also knew that there was much more racing through the younger woman's head. Sky Blue was very much out of the play offs but the team was attempting to end on a high note. But for Kelley, this game was about much more than pride. Facing the woman who broke your heart more times than Christie could count was never easy.
Sure, Kelley had to face Hope during the World Cup. They were even sort of friendly (if thats what you would like to call Hope pretty much ignoring the young defender 95% of the time.) But that all changed after they won; being drunk and celebrating was never the two women's specialty. Kelley woke up July 6th, 2015, with a head ache like no other, her body only clothed by the white hotel sheet, and a cold bed. Once again Hope had won, she got what she wanted and she ran, leaving Kelley with nothing but an empty bed and a broken heart.
Trying her best to act like it didn't phase her, Kelley passed her time celebrating their victory with the team and secretly counting down the hours until she could return to New Jersey. She kept her distance from the keeper and the keeper didn't step within 30 ft. of Kelley. It was almost like that night never happened. It wasn't until after the Taylor Swift concert that Kelley, while she was drunk, broke down in the arms of Alex. It was then that she would no longer let whatever captivated her about Hope destroy her. But boy, she was not prepared for how much work that was. Award shows, two victory tour games, and now this NWSL game and Kelley felt absolutely defeated.
With her eyes closed and her head still pressed against the window, Kelley felt her phone vibrate from within her coat pocket. Shifting in her seat she withdrew the iPhone expecting it to be a message from her mom just reassuring her that she played great and they would get them next season. What she was not expecting was the name Hope Solo to be written across the screen. Her eyes began to burn and she was unsure if it was due to the brightness of her screen contrasting the darkness of the bus or the tears that she was trying to fight against.
"You don't have to answer it Kell. I can take your phone and delete the message for you and you will never have to know what she said. But only if you want me to," Christie whispered while once again squeezing Kelley's hand in support.
Kelley cleared her throat and once she knew knew she could speak with out breaking down she handed the phone over to the older woman, "read it first and then you decide what you should do with it."
Of course Kelley wanted to read the message, it was painful knowing she might not have the chance to if the older woman chose to delete it. She had wanted to text Hope right after she grabbed her hand on the field after the game. With one tiny squeeze, all of Kelley's strength washed away with the rain that was pouring down on them. But she knew that Cap was just trying to protect her and she would make the correct decision.
Slowly swiping the screen to open the message Christie swallowed hard. She wasn't sure what to expect but after reading the message ten times she was certain that what was written out on the phone was the last thing she imagined Hope to say.
Hope Solo 12:56 am: I'm leaving him Kell..just thought you deserved to know.
Kelley carefully studied the older defender's facial expression and knew that whatever Hope had sent had frozen Christie in shock. Without thinking Kelley grabbed the phone from Christie's hand. Cap tried to pull back but was too slow and watched carefully as Kelley read the message. She waited for some sort of reaction but Kelley's hazel eyes remained locked onto the screen.
Finally she handed the phone back to Christie, "Delete it."
Kelley's voice was as emotionless as her face. Cap cautiously took the phone and deleted the message before placing it back into Kelley's hand.
"She doesn't deserve you Kelley. You are an amazingly strong person and I'm so proud of how much you've grown," Christie whispered.
Kelley could hear the anger in the woman's voice and was confused why Christie could feel angry with Hope who was once again playing mind games, while she sat there feeling nothing. She wanted desperately to feel something whether it be fury or sadness she didn't care. But instead her body settled with emptiness which only made Kelley furious at herself.
She watched as their bus pulled into the hotel parking lot and couldn't be more thankful. Picking up all of her belongings she walked slowly to her room, dragging her feet with every step.
"O'Hara!" Sky Blue's coach yelled to her just as she was about to enter the elevator.
"Whats up coach?" Kelley questioned. Her coach could sense the irritation in her voice.
"Listen, you played well tonight kid, stop being so hard on yourself. We've had this talk before and you know everything can't always go our way," Coach Gabarra chuckled. "Anyways, I was just notified theres something waiting for you at the front desk I'm not sure what a letter, message, I didn't really ask but I was told to tell you. Get a good nights rest kid, we still have one more game ahead of us!" Coach smiled as he took the elevator she had called for herself.
Shrugging her shoulders Kelley turned back down the hall towards the front desk. She wasn't expecting something but it was probably a care package from her mom. Karen O'Hara always knew exactly when her middle child was feeling home sick, "mother's instinct" she always said. She picked up her pace and smiled for the first time tonight, her mom's homemade cookies always made her feel better and she could definitely use them right now.
Kelley turned the corner and her smile dropped along with her stomach and all of her soccer gear. Hope was sitting in a chair by the front desk fiddling with something in her lap. Kelley quickly tried to pick her stuff up from the floor cursing at herself under her breath. She prayed that she could escape with out being seen but when she looked up she knew she was screwed.
Hope, who had been startled from the sound of something falling, was already half way over to the smaller woman. Watching Kelley crouched down as she gathered her things, she took in how small and vulnerable she looked in this position. Locking her icy blue eyes with hazel ones, the older woman's heart started to race. She slowly bent down to help but Kelley shot up and and crossed her arms across her chest defensively.
"Why are you here?" Kelley mumbled trying her best to remain strong.
Hope took a step towards the smaller woman. Her blue eyes still locked with hazel ones, "We need to talk and since you didn't respond to my text message this was my only other choice."
"What? Me ignoring your message wasn't obvious enough for you. I don't want to do this Solo," Kelley scoffed in disbelief. Turning her back towards the keeper she began walking towards the elevator. But before Kelley could even take 3 steps Hope's hand was firmly grasping her shoulder pulling her back.
"Listen Kell, just five minutes. Please." Hope watched as Kelley flinched at the sound of her nickname; a nickname that many people used but when it came to Hope, "Kell" meant so much more. The name was a symbol of their past and overflowed with the history of what was and what could have been. She watched as the freckles on Kelley's nose scrunched up as she contemplated her answer.
"Fine, five minutes and no longer. And I'm not kidding Hope I will be watching the time," Kelley finally answered. She nervously pushed her hair back and felt her palms become clammy. She didn't want to regret this decision but when it came to the tall, dark, and twisty woman, regret was always the result.
Ushering Kelley into an open conference room, Hope smiled and let out a breath she didn't even know she was holding in. She knew she would need longer than five minutes but to even get the freckled face defender to agree was a small enough victory for Hope to feel a small sense of relief.