Chapter 2
Your name is Dave Strider and you think you might be at an existential crossroads, both metaphorically and literally. Wind whips up beneath your feet as you hover over the fork in the dirt path deep within the forest. You’re supposed to be aging up a few species to get life going, sort of a way to fast-track things on this new planet. Jane and Jade are somewhere around here too, though you lost track of them a few minutes ago when you were distracted by what you are still being distracted by.
Karkat sort of broke up with you. Well, not sort of, he did break up with you. You’re not his matesprit anymore, as you’ve flipped into the spades quadrant three days ago. You guess you’re still his boyfriend though? Who knows, this shit is too fucking confusing.
You wave your hand over a tree to your left, willing time to age it into a blossoming adult. Thick, round fruits form where the buds of flowers once were. They look really good, your mouth even waters a bit at wondering how juicy they probably are, but before you can reach out and pick one, the whole thing wilts. The once delicious looking fruits are now withered and brown as they fall to the dirt.
“Fuck,” you mutter, willing time to return to normal around the already-dead tree. Okay, that’s fucking embarrassing. Good thing the girls aren’t around to see your grand mistake.
“Dave, what the hell?” Jade’s voice rings out from behind you. You lose all faith in the gods (ironic, since you are one of the gods, but you suppose you never had much faith in yourself to begin with). “When I said age up some plants I didn’t mean kill them!”
“Well shit, Harley, gotta be more specific with me, you know I don’t follow directions well,” you answer as you lower yourself to the ground. “I’ll try not to fuck up the rest of the forest, aight?”
“Dave.” Her voice is soft and sincere, and it damn near breaks you. You can feel that your shades do no good to stop her from gazing into your soul. “I’m not stupid, I know something happened with you and Karkat.”
The sound of his name makes you wince more than the accusation. Her hand is suddenly on your shoulder, radiating warmth.
“It’s cool,” you answer with a forced smirk. “We’re all good.”
“He moved out of your apartment,” she frowns. It stings. Her hand rubs at your shoulder as if to ease the pain. “Rose said you might need someone to talk to about it, so…”
“Okay, your daily friendship duties are done, nice work,” you say as you brush her hand away. “You can report back to my snarky bitch of a sister that I’m peachy-fucking-keen.”
“I didn’t just ask because Rose said I should,” she rolls her eyes. “I care about you, moron.”
You bring a hand to your heart and offer the most insincere smile you can muster. “I’m so goddamn touched.”
Jade rolls her eyes again and snatches your hand, pulling you down to the mossy brush of the forest. You don’t bother resisting as you sit beside her, crossing your legs in front of you as you lean back on your palms. The soil beneath you is slightly damp, it feels squishy and new and natural in a way that you’ve never experienced before. You passively wonder if this place is similar to where Jade grew up, if she got to breathe in fresh oxygen and move through a growing green forest every day.
“Consider this an unofficial feels session,” Jade interrupts your thoughts by gently poking your cheek. She sits back on her legs, the fabric of her tights wearing thin over her knees. She’s not wearing her god pajamas, but the color scheme of her clothes matches it pretty closely. The witchy black and white leggings hug her thighs beneath her high-waisted grey shorts while a flowy black tank top hangs loosely over her chest.
You catch yourself staring at her collar bone, thinking of how smooth and sharp and perfect it looks. Her skin is a rich caramel color, sunkissed and nearly glowing against the stark black curls of her hair. Shit, you’re totally checking her out. You can only hope that she doesn’t notice the way your gaze lingers on her from behind your shades. Jade breathes out a heavy sigh, and she opens her eyes (when did she close them?? You don’t know, you were too busy staring at her like a fucking creep). Her smile is soft and genuine as she looks at you as if there weren’t a solarized barrier between your eyes and the rest of the world.
“Fine, he decided we would fit better in the hatefuck quadrant so he broke up with my hearts and latched onto my spades,” you say quickly, tilting your head towards the sky. “And yeah, I’m rightfully pissed about it because we were together for the better part of three years, during which he was cool with all the quadrant flipping bullshit. But now that we’re suddenly in a new place, starting a new fucking chapter in our collective lives or whatever, he decides we need to play by the rules… oh, fuck.”
The realization hits you like a fucking truck. You flop back onto the ground and shove your glasses off your face so your palms can effectively rub at your eyes. You’re so fucking stupid.
“First of all, you’re not pissed off, you’re hurt,” Jade’s voice says. “Secondly, what’re you freaking out about?” She pokes your side, and you definitely do not flinch because it kind of tickles.
You drop your hands, letting your arms fall out to your sides so you can squint at her. “He broke up with me because there’s more options now.”
“Options?”
“Yeah,” you sigh in near defeat. “Our teenage guardians, you and John and Davesprite…there’s more people around now, so he’s got other options for the hearts quadrant. He doesn’t have to settle for me and my bullshit anymore.”
“That’s so dumb,” Jade says in a way that you just know she’s also rolling her eyes at you. She scoots closer to you and leans down on one side, her elbow in the dirt while her hand props up her head. “And kind of weirdo, over-analyzing-y for you.”
“It’s true,” you glare. “And he’s gonna end up with one or two other boyfriends or girlfriends or whatever, and I’ll be the dependent ex-wife still calling him up for child support money and dates because I truly believe we could make this thing work and stick together for the kids.”
Your mouth is suddenly impeded by Jade’s hand. You lick it and it tastes like dirt, so you be sure to convey your disgust. That was stupid, you’re stupid.
“Shut up,” she laughs, wiping the remnants of your saliva off on your shirt. “You’re doing what you always do. You’re mixing your metaphors and sounding like an idiot, just like when you were thirteen.”
“You shut up,” you glare. “I’m not the same dumbass I was when I was thirteen.”
“Hard to believe.”
“For starters,” you begin, sitting up to face her. “I’m pretty sure I didn’t like dick when I was thirteen.”
“And I’m pretty sure you were just in denial about liking dick when you were thirteen,” Jade laughs and pokes at your nose. You scrunch your face up at her as you fail to think up a decent comeback, and settle for childishly sticking your tongue out. (You were going to make a comment comparing her to Rose, but you’re still too pissed at your ecto-sister to even bring her up in conversation).
“Well, I’m not gonna make you talk about it if you really don’t wanna,” she sighs, leaning back in the brush beside you. The wind rustles the leaves of the trees you haven’t killed, and Jade’s dog ears twitch at the noise.
“So how do those work?” you ask, pointing. “Do you still have normal ears under there or were they like zapped off or something?”
“I still have normal ears,” she sounds slightly offended as she glances at you. “They just don’t work. These are better anyways, I can hear anything from a mile away.” She twitches her ears again, and you smirk.
“Can I touch ‘em?” you ask.
“On the first date?” she gasps comedicly. “What kind of lady do you take me for Mr. Strider?”
“You wanna be wined and dined, you came to the wrong Strider,” you laugh, reaching up to scratch at the fluff of her left dog ear. She mimics your grin and leans into your touch, emitting what almost sounds like a purr from the back of her throat.
“Wrong Strider either way, since you both like dick,” Jade snarks back.
“Hey, Dirk may be close minded, but I happen to be a two way street,” you say defensively. “I’m not gay, alright?”
“I find that hard to believe,” she giggles, still leaning against your hand. You scratch a bit more before curling your fingers into her hair and rubbing at the other ear. “You’ve never had a crush on a girl. And don’t bring up whatever you had with Rose all those years ago, because that was a joke and you both know it.”
“I had a crush on you too,” you answer without thinking. You’re just glad you remembered to use past tense. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure you’re a chick.”
“Straight guys don’t call girls ‘chicks’ you weirdo.”
“Well I’m not straight!”
“You’re also ‘not gay’,” she says, using air quotes and all. “So what is the truth?” She wiggles her eyebrows, and it reminds you too much of Egbert for your liking. You stop rubbing her ears and move back to lean on your palms.
You hate this question, this discussion. All the talk of sexuality and identity and what definitions mean when thrown into different contexts…you spent more time that you’d have liked to talking about all this with Rose, then Karkat, then Dirk…you really don’t want to go over it again with Jade. Why should it matter what you’re attracted to? Nothing ever fucking works out for you anyways, so it shouldn’t matter. It doesn’t matter.
You must really seem upset, because Jade is looking at you like she’s worried.
“Hey,” she nudges you with her shoulder. “You know I’m kidding.” Her voice has gone serious, emerald eyes wide as she stares through you.
“Warn me ahead of time, yeah?” you mutter and nudge back weakly.
She sighs so heavily, you can almost feel the tension she’s releasing. When she flops onto her back, a bed of flowers cushions her fall, and she scrunches up her face at you. You can’t help but smirk as you join her down on the ground, secretly loving the softness of the jasmine petals on your forearms.
“Ya know, I don’t really give a shit about all that stuff,” she says as she nudges you. “Like, way before you decided to make it cool to stop caring about our dead society.”
“Now who’s the hipster?” you nudge her back. Jade giggles, and it’s infectious. There’s a heat spreading across your cheeks, and you don’t think it’s from the sun.
“Seriously though,” she says after a deep breath. “I think it’s cool how we can make our own rules now with our own planet. Like, all of those old standards are gone. No more rich, old, white guys deciding everything for us.”
“Yeah now it’s just young, queer gods deciding everything,” you snort a laugh, and she does the same.
Silence hangs over the two of you again, but it’s nice, peaceful. A breeze rolls over the hill you’re lying on, rustling the leaves of the trees and brushing the velvety flower petals against your skin. Jade’s hair gets caught up in the wind and tickles your nose, and with everything else around you- the stupidly calm atmosphere and overwhelming happiness- it makes you laugh. Like, actually laugh. Your stomach starts to hurt as you curl in on yourself, laughing uncontrollably like a kid who just got exactly what they wanted for Christmas.
Jade turns on her side, propping her head up with her arm, grinning at you and giggling a bit at what you can only imagine is the most ridiculous display she’s ever seen out of you.
“Holy fuckin’ shit,” you sputter out between laughs. You throw your arm over your eyes, reveling in the heat on your cheeks and the way your face hurts from smiling for so long. “Dude, every single shitty thing is over, do you realize that, Jade? Like all the bullshit we had to deal with before, our shitty families and crappy, polluted towns and dumbass politicians making stupid decisions…it’s all done with!”
“Mhmm,” Jade hums, smiling wide and rolling onto her stomach as she watches you.
You probably look like you’re losing your fucking mind, which, yeah maybe you might be, just a little. It’s so dumb how long it took this realization to hit you, though. You guys are literally gods of your own world, of your own fucking universe. You make the rules, you can do whatever you want, and you’re finally fucking free!
You don’t know how long you kept on laughing or staring up at the sky, but when you look back over at Jade, she’s still got that soft smile on her face. She’s tying the stems of the jasmine flowers together, finishing her second flower crown as you stare. There’s already a thick array of flowers in her hair, some of them coming loose from the rest of the crown and sticking in the curls that cascade down her shoulders. She looks like some sort of nymph, like a fairy tale creature from a children’s book you were never allowed to read as a kid. You pluck a flower from the grass and reach up to stick it above one of her dog ears. They twitch at your touch, and her eyes meet yours. She’s smiling wide, and you mirror it without meaning to.
Fuck, everything feels so right. This feels right, it feels good.
You don’t know what you’re doing when your fingertips linger on her cheek, when you roll across the brush towards her, when you press your lips to her mouth…
Ever since you reached godtier, you’ve been able to feel the movement of time around you. Each tick of your internal clock, counting the hours, minutes, seconds, nanoseconds… Your head spins with numbers like gears, like the clicking of a metronome that matches the beat of the song of the universe. The tune glides through your head like vinyl beneath your fingertips, and you read each bump and groove as if you’ve known brail forever.
As you kiss Jade, time slows down.
Everything is smooth and soft, perfectly cradled in your hands like the skin of your lips against her cheek…trailing down her jaw…brushing the crook of her neck. Her breath is warm and soothing in your ears, and her hands are those of a goddess as she runs them through your hair.
Time is standing still, and you’re surrounded by a galaxy made up of clouds and flowers and blooming trees—dead fruits, swirling solar systems, the clinking of gears and clicking of guns—and holy fuck, everything is soft and perfect. You can’t breathe, you’re suffocating on warm, wet cotton, but it feels so fucking right and you never want to stop.
This moment is the first since you became a god, that you lose track of time.
You immediately decide that you absolutely fucking love it.
“Dave,” Jade’s whispered breath is hot against your lips. “You okay?”
Your eyes slowly open, and you’re almost startled at how close she is to you. She’s hovering over you, the thick curls of her hair flowing over one shoulder and creating a curtain that mimics the sky; dark, swirling masses littered with bright dots of life. You know they’re flowers, but you could swear that they looked just like stars in your hazy state.
“What the fuck was that,” you manage to breathe.
“Was that the first time you kissed one of us?” she asks softly. Her fingertips graze over your cheek and it starts a glowing warmth across your skin. The question confuses you, you can’t even make yourself answer, but somehow you both know that she understands.
“As gods,” she goes on. “When we’re together, it has an effect on our universe. Jane spreads life, and when she’s close to Jake, that life is filled with hope…flowers bloom, creatures evolve. John and I have gotten closer, and now his breeze follows me everywhere. Any kind of bond effects our aspects and influences our universe.”
She pauses, and you meet her eyes. You swear you can see the swirling galaxies in those emerald pools.
“When we kiss, it has the biggest impact,” she says, a blush reaching her cheeks. “But…with you, just now…that’s the most I’ve ever felt.”
Nothing she’s saying makes sense, but you’re totally captivated by her words. Something clicks in your mind, and your fingers tangle in the soft curls of her hair. You really, really want to kiss her again.
“Space and time,” you say, like it’s a revelation. “Guess that makes sense…. Who else have you tried this with?”
“It was Rose’s theory,” she tells you. “She’s like a genius with all this stuff. So we tried, and she was right. I could feel all my stars getting brighter, I could practically see the outer edge of the Frog glowing…”
Her delicate fingertips find the pulse on your neck, and you unconsciously let it fall into beat with your internal metronome.
“What did you feel?” you ask. “Just now, I mean…like, with…me.”
“Everything,” she breathes. “The whole universe, since we got here and created it…everything in the past and everything that’s going to happen, all across…everything.”
“Space and time,” you repeat. “All of it, at once… Fuck, I could feel it too.”
You know you should talk more about this, possibly go find Rose and tell her about this stunning revelation regarding your status as gods and the powers you hold effecting the universe. You should get up and finish working on the trees in the forest before sundown. You should go back to your place and meet up with Dirk like you promised you would.
You should do lots of things, but you know you won’t.
Instead, your lips find Jade’s again, and you’re lost beneath her. You focus on it now as she kisses you—all of time and space wrapping around you, merging together and expanding and burning like the fires of the sun. You lose track of time, of your internal clock, of everything that isn’t connected to Jade because suddenly she is all that matters. Every part of your body touching her brings an ebb and flow of energy, like heat waves that you’re quickly becoming addicted to. You need to be closer to her, but the contrast of your urgency and gentleness is so fucking perfect that it feels like you’re slowing down even as things speed up.
If you ever doubted your statuses as gods in this world, Jade is the proof before your eyes. Her skin is smoldering and dark against the pale jasmine—against your own cool, pale skin. Everything feels like steam and solar flares and evaporating clouds as you sink into her, and all of space envelopes time across the universe. You lose yourself completely, you forget your name, forget your physical form as you make love to the goddess of space, and it is the most beautiful, amazing thing you’ll ever know.