Kanaya
You grabbed the sweater solemnly, sliding it on with a grim disposition. Pulling the door open, your eyes widened briefly as you recognized the graceful presence of Kanaya Maryam standing on your doorstep.
“Pardon me ______, I did not intend to intrude if you are busy with something.” He ears twitched slightly at the volume of your music, earring chain jingling.
“No, don’t worry, I always have time for you Kan.” The truth was, even if you didn’t have time, for Kanaya you could always make some. She was just so beautiful; tall, rounded in all the right ways, she always spoke so pristine but also so- well her. There was no other way to explain it. And you guessed that was why she had held your affections for this long now.
“Oh, thank you. I was wondering if perhaps you wished to come along to my hive and enlighten me on some of my new designs? Human fashion is rather different than Alternian as you could guess. I want to make sure it is perfect. A model really, different body types and all that.” She smiled that little fanged smile that melted your heart, and your eyes froze on her dark lipstick. The things this troll woman could do with makeup, where you couldn’t even use liquid eyeliner without making a mess, it was insane.
“I mean, if you really want me to come over, I guess I can’t object.” You stepped back inside, moving over to your computer and shutting down the music before the monitor. “But only for a little while, okay? I gotta sleep and I haven’t eaten in a while.” You fumbled out, carefully pulling your arms into your chest as you closed the front door behind yourself.
Just a little while. For her. Even if you kept messing things up, at least you could do a little something for her.
Kana nodded excitedly, “I am just pleased to have you in my company this fine evening ______.” The sun was just at it’s early stages of setting, and you found yourself gazing at it a few times as you walked to Kanaya’s hive. When you arrived, she pushed the door open and led you inside. There seemed to be even more fabrics than the last time you visited, and some of the red fabrics themselves seemed to be torn at the edges. Your eyes scrunched slightly as you walked by them, but you continued following your hostess.
She led you to the mannequin room, a small collection of the figures in the back with a wall set up to block the view, and a makeshift runway set up. “I will wait out here, you can find a few outfits either folded or on display, you can pick of your own comfort.” She spoke, taking a seat in the folding chair at the end of the runway, grabbing a sketchbook that you recognized as being filled with her designs.
With a sheepish nod and a swallow of your spit, you walked up the runway, to examine the different piles of clothes all folded with small notes on them. They were all signed in that familiar jade, beautiful looping cursive.
‘Summer, main colors- yellow, orange, ash grey.’
You walked down the tables, examining each set of clothes, some holding purses and handbags where others contained jewelry or gloves. With each one however, your hopes shrunk and shrunk even more. Not a single one had long sleeves. It was close to fifteen minutes now, debating whether or not to change into anything at all when Kanaya’s voice spoke to you from around the partition.
“______?”
“S-Sorry Kanaya! I’ll b-be right out!” You tried to let out a light hearted laugh, but it came out more like a choked sob before your hand clamped over your mouth.
You picked up a shirt quickly, coming to terms it was a tank top and moving to pull off your sweater. You did, a sickening smile breaking out as the fabric rubbed against your raw skin and you noticed the rather disgusting look of bandages and dried blood on your newly exposed skin. “I can’t do this,” you whimpered, squeezing your eyes shut. It was one thing to do it alone in the privacy of your house, but no one could see. No one could know. Especially not Kanaya. And for her to find out in this way, you simply couldn’t allow it. “Kanaya, I-I’m sorry but I can’t do this. I changed my mind.” Your words hurt, almost as if they were spiked as they came out from your mouth.
“I apologize if I have done something wrong, but I respect your wishes.” Kanaya replied, worry flicking along in the undertone of her speech.
“I wish I could. Really. I guess I’m just not pretty enough to model your clothes.” Great, now you were bringing your self loathing to the party.
“You are the most beautiful person I know.” Kanaya responded almost immediately. “The way you sway your shoulders when you walk, that little giggle you do that defies the classical laws of affectionate displays, your hair that flows and catches the light in the perfect way as to frame your face, you exude true grace.” You froze in your tracks as you listened to her talk. “Your eyes, I find myself getting lost in them rather frequently if you’d pardon the cliché. You are truly beautiful ______. It pains me to hear that you do not see as I see.” She stepped out from behind the partition, eyes meeting yours.
“I’m not any of that Kan, you’ve gotta be talking about someone else.” Your voice was breaking now.
“Yes, you are. Even with those nasty scars.” Her voice was lower than normal, a soothing almost waltz through the air between the two of you. She edged closer, and rested her hand on the exposed ski of your forearm with a small wince escaping you. “Perhaps I could,” Her eyes traced your arms worriedly. “Help clean you up?”
“I think I’d like that Kanaya.” You babbled, small smile crossing your lips and you made eye contact with her once again. She looked at you like you were the whole world, and every second you lapped it up. To someone like her, you could be this important? It was nearly unbelievable. But still, the way tears dripped down one by one from the corners of your eyes, and her gentle hand moved to wipe them away, you leaned into her.
“Will I… Have to clean you up conventionally?” She asked quietly, once your quiet sniffling calmed down. That explained the ripped red fabrics. “You have always been so beneficial for my cravings.” You laughed, at first quiet before shaking your whole body.
“No Kan, whatever helps. As long as you’re not just keeping me around for a meal.” Your arms moved to wrap around Kanaya’s back and you sighed slightly as she embraced you in return.
“I would never.” She replied, nuzzling her cheek against yours.