Satellite

Tanaka squinted at Suga as he put on his shoes. He crossed his arms over his chest.

“There’s something goin’ on.”

Suga adjusted the bag on his shoulder, turned to face Tanaka, and reached out to rub his head.

“Don’t think too hard now. You might hurt yourself,” Suga said with a laugh.

“I’m serious!” Tanaka shouted as he wiggled out of Suga’s grasp. “Where’s Daichi again?”

Suga sighed. “For the millionth time, I figured I’d let him off the hook today so he could put all his energy into keeping you two,” he looked down the hallway to see Noya trying to jump on to the counter and slide off of the other side, “in line for practices this week. Lord knows he’s going to need all the help he can get.”

Tanaka rubbed his chin. He wasn’t convinced. “I dunno. It’s weird not seeing the two of you together.”

Suga rolled his eyes. Tanaka put a hand on each of Suga’s shoulders and looked him straight in the eye. “Did Daichi do something to ya?”

“Daichi and I are fine. YOU, however, need to take a chill pill.” Suga took Tanaka’s hands off his shoulders and brushed off his shirt. “I am my own person, you know,” he said with a cocked eyebrow.

“I know I know, it’s just that you seem kinda off, and it’s weird for Daichi to just let you do something and not drop everything to help.”

Suga smiled wide but cursed himself for allowing his friends to see right through him. The truth was that Suga was afraid. They had been talking since the confession, but it was mostly logistical and band-related. Suga owed him an explanation, he owed him a thousand explanations, but he wanted to wait until after the show. He didn’t want to jeopardize their success.

“Eh, I’m just tired. And Daichi probably is, too. He does work full time on top of keeping us all together.”

“True true,” Tanaka agreed. Noya joined them at the door with a twinkle in his eye

“I still can’t believe you’re going to miss our party! It’s going to be insane!”

Suga’s heart ached, but he kept smiling. “You’ll have a thousand more, I’m sure.”

Noya and Tanaka pouted. It was time for a subject change.

“Anyway, take tons of pictures for me. I’m sure Kiyoko will look divine tonight on her date.

It was like the heavens opened and illuminated the hallway. They had tears in their eyes

“But, keep in mind, if you mess anything up for her, I WILL find out and Daichi WILL make you practice until your hands bleed,” Suga chirped.

The light faded from the background and they gulped loudly. Suga put his arms around their necks and pulled them in for a hug.

“Seriously though. Promise me there will be no fires,” Suga said as he pulled away.

Noya and Tanaka crossed their hearts and swore on their jobs as Kiyoko’s treasured underlings. Suga opened their front door to leave.

“See ya next week for practice!” Noya waved.

“Yep! Tell Kinoshita and Narita that I wish them the best of luck!”

“Luck with what?” Tanaka cocked his head.

Suga shook his head with a laugh, waved, and closed the door behind him as he exited the house.

The next night, while his friends were gathering for Noya and Tanaka’s housewarming party, Suga waited in his living room for a cab. He tried not to think about it as he picked up pieces of scrap paper, pens, notebooks, and guitar picks that Hinata and Kageyama had scattered around his apartment like confetti.

He picked up a piece of paper and read over the familiar lyrics. Suga let out a long breath and put his face in his hand.

Hinata had found one of Suga’s more recent lyrics and begged him to let Kageyama write music for them. It didn’t take long for Suga to cave, but, out of all the songs he had written in the past six months, somehow Hinata had found his most personal song yet, written right between his first session with Oikawa and Daichi’s confession. He never meant for anyone to see those lyrics.

Suga brought the piece of paper over to the couch and sat down. He checked the time. Daichi would be driving over to Noya and Tanaka’s. He would show up, try to hide how proud he was of them, and let them drag him around their place. He would laugh and help set up the food that Suga had stocked the fridge the day before.

He gripped the paper tightly. Daichi said he loved him, but who did he love?

Suga thought about Tanaka and hoped that Hinata and Kageyama hadn’t picked up on all the sadness and uncertainty that he had tried so hard to hide.

His thoughts were cut short by the ringer on his phone, Suga picked up and looked out the window. The cab was there. He ran his fingers through his hair, grabbed his bag, and locked the door on his way out.

The driver confirmed the address of the hotel where Oikawa was staying. He had wanted to use his personal suite, which was usually not the way Suga did things, but Oikawa was “so lonely, Koushi,” and “Iwa-chan abandoned me, so please come Saturday night.” Suga rolled his eyes. When he had tried to move up their time, or move the day, Oikawa cooly reminded him that beggars couldn’t be choosers. The bile rose in his throat and he swallowed hard.

Suga did the math again in his head. With the money he got from their first session, this one, and another one before The Court left town for their next tour, he would have enough to cover at least another month’s rent and utilities. After this week, after the show, he could stop. He could make everything right.

Once Suga paid the cab driver, he went into the hotel and let himself into Oikawa’s suite. He dropped his bag by the door and poked his head into the bedroom. The room was completely bare except for a small piece of paper on the floor between the bed and the dresser.

His curiosity got the better of him and he picked up the piece of paper, which, he found, was actually a photograph. Suga turned it over in his hands. It looked had been folded the same way for years. He unfolded the picture and a blush crept across his face.

Iwaizumi stared back at him from the dead center of the picture. He looked like he was about to the speak and he had his arm raised like he didn’t want the picture taken. Suga was mesmerized by the way Iwaizumi’s mouth curved, the way his eyes were a kaleidoscope of browns and greens, the way he looked at the camera like the person behind it was the only thing that mattered.

The background was completely dark, so Suga couldn’t tell where the picture was taken, and he didn’t know Iwaizumi that well, so he couldn’t tell how old it was. All he recognized from the photo was the look of a man in love.

“You can look all you want, just don’t fall in love with him,” Oikawa said from the door.

Suga jumped in surprise. He had been so absorbed in the picture that he didn’t hear Oikawa enter the room.

Oikawa plucked the picture from Suga’s hand and folded it delicately before he slipped it into his back pocket. From the looks of the picture and the practiced way he slipped it into his jeans, it seemed like Oikawa didn’t spend much time away from the picture.

“I don’t think that’ll be a problem,” Suga said blankly.

Oikawa put his hands on his hips and puffed out his cheeks. Suga tried to read the goofy expression on his face but came up with nothing.

“If even Iwa-chan isn’t up to YOUR standards, I guess I should be grateful that you would stoop to my level.”

The comment dripped with sarcasm, but Suga couldn’t help wonder if Oikawa really did think that Iwaizumi was out of reach.

“You are paying me, Oikawa,” Suga reminded him.

“So crude, Kou-chan,” Oikawa whined.

Suga sat back down on the bed behind him. “So personal, Tooru.”

Oikawa pursed his lips and looked at him through lowered lashes. “Am I going to be punished for this?”

“That depends on you,” Suga glanced at the clock over Oikawa’s shoulder. Oikawa turned to follow Suga’s gaze.

Suga reached for his work phone, hit the time, and turned all of his attention to the client in front of him.

When the timer went off, Suga extricated himself from Oikawa’s grasp, grabbed a robe, and headed for the bathroom. When he turned off the water of the shower to dry himself off, he heard Oikawa singing on the other side of the door as he walked around the room. Oikawa might be a client, but that didn’t mean Suga couldn’t enjoy his music. He leaned against the door and listened.

The melody was unfamiliar; it wasn’t the electronic, bubbly, sweet melody that Suga associated with him. He missed the first verse, but caught the next one.

    And I have to speculate
    That God himself did make
    Us into corresponding shapes
    Like puzzle pieces from the clay.

Suga smiled despite himself and thought of Daichi, how when they kissed it had felt like every crazy, bizarre puzzle piece in the world clicked into place. Oikawa kept singing.

    And true, it may seem like a stretch,
    But it’s thoughts like this that catch
    My troubled head when you’re away
    And when I’m missing you to death.

His mind wandered to the picture of Iwaizumi that Oikawa slipped skillfully into his pocket. Oikawa stepped farther from the door and Suga had trouble hearing the next words. When he finally moved closer, Suga paid close attention to the chorus.

    They will see us waving from such great heights.
    “Come down now,” they’ll say,
    But everything looks perfect from far away.
    Come down now, but we’ll stay.

It was a love song. A beautiful love song. Suga didn’t recognize it, so he doubted that Oikawa had ever recorded it. Was it a secret? Was it about Iwaizumi?

His thoughts were forcefully redirected by a knock on the door.

“Sugawara, I would hate to have to call the cops and tell them a prostitute drowned in my bath tub. It wouldn’t reflect well on either of us.”

“I’ll be out in a second.” Suga said through the door with a leg already through one of his pant legs. When Suga got out of the bathroom, Oikawa pointed at an envelope on the dresser without turning to look.

Suga shoved the envelope in his back pocket and paused before he left the bedroom. “Did you write that song?”

He nodded, back still turned.

“It was really good,” Suga said as nonchalantly as he could.

Oikawa spun around and glared at Suga with his intense, dark eyes. “Of course it’s good,” he scoffed. Suga laughed.

“Now, if you don’t mind, I have work to do,” Oikawa looked at the phone in his hand and waved Suga off.

“Alright, let me know about later this week.”

Oikawa hummed in response and Suga left the suite without looking back. He waited until he got into the cab to pull out his personal phone and check for party updates. Most of the texts were incomprehensible and all of the photos he got were blurry. Daichi was in the background of all of them and Suga laughed aloud. He opened a text from Daichi from the beginning of the party.

From: Daichi
The house looks great and the food is amazing - I didn’t eat any of the dumplings, I swear! Yachi and Kiyoko were just looking for you. We wish you were here. Hope you’re having a good night!

He clutched his phone to his chest for a second and took a deep breath before moving on to the sound file that Hinata had sent. He plugged in his headphones to listen.

The song was beautiful; Hinata’s voice and Kageyama’s guitar danced together perfectly and Suga felt like the pride that swelled in his chest would seep out of his pores and swallow him whole. Hinata’s voice carried Suga’s words and they reverberated through his entire body.

He watched the streetlights from the cab window and, the next thing he knew, the cab driver was waking him up in front of his apartment building.

The day after the party, everyone buckled down for the week ahead of them. Suga coordinated everyone’s schedules, and Daichi and Asahi went to check out the acoustics of the venue and talk to Ukai about the schedule for the night. Everyone else took the day to recover from the party.

In the afternoon, Oikawa got in touch with him to schedule their last session before he joined the rest of his band on the road and Suga was relieved. They agreed to meet in the afternoon on Thursday, right before Oikawa left, which was perfect. Since Suga had the schedules, he knew that everyone was busy and would be meeting up later for last-minute set list prep. He wouldn’t miss anything and Oikawa would leave and everything would work out.

Suga went to sleep that night with a strange calm and nervous excitement. He couldn’t wait for the week, the weekend, and every day after that.

On Monday afternoon, the day that intensive practices were supposed to start, Suga’s peace was interrupted by the obnoxious ring of his door buzzer. He eyed the door suspiciously. He wasn’t expecting anyone.

When he went down to check who it was, he put his hands on his hips and let out a long breath. Kageyama stood on his stoop with his usual scowl and guitar strapped to his back. When he saw Suga in the door, he waved.

“Kageyama, I thought you and Hinata were in class all day?”

Kageyama shifted from one foot to the other and adjusted the strap of his guitar bag. “Yeah, I, I mean, we were. Can I come in?”

“Sure,” Suga said slowly. “Is everything okay?”

Kageyama shrugged and Suga beckoned him into the building and up the stairs to his apartment. Once they were settled, Suga made them some tea and sat down across from Kageyama at the kitchen table table. Suga noticed Kageyama glance at the couch, where he and Hinata had worked so diligently the week before.

They sipped their tea in silence. Kageyama obviously wanted to talk, but didn’t know quite how to start, so Suga tried to start the conversation.

“Hinata sent me a recording of my song that you played at the party. You guys did an amazing job. Did everyone like it?”

“It was just me and Hinata playing,” Kageyama mumbled into his tea.

“Oh,” Suga sighed. He was a little relieved that no one else had heard the song yet. Suga took another sip of tea and stared at Kageyama. “How about ‘thank you kindly for letting us use your amazing lyrics and for the compliment,’ hm?”

Kageyama dipped his head. “Thank you for letting write music for your lyrics. They were beautiful.”

Suga leaned back in his chair and smiled wide. “No worries. I’m glad my lyrics are in capable hands.”

Kageyama blushed and tapped the surface of the table. Finally, he looked up from his mug and looked right into Suga’s eyes. “I kissed Hinata for the first time today after class.”

Suga almost spit out his tea. The two of them definitely had chemistry, but Suga assumed it was too early for anything to actually happen. He didn’t think they talked about anything other than music. “What?! Did you confess?”

Kageyama shook his head ‘no’ but didn’t say anything and Suga leaned towards him. “Wait, why isn’t Hinata here? What happened exactly?”

“We were sitting under a tree after class and talking about the show this weekend. Hinata was being a dumbass and screeching about how excited he was. I told him to shut up because people were staring and he was being a dumbass - “

“Alright, I get it, Hinata’s a dumbass. Get to the kissing.”

“He stopped talking for a second and I went for it,” Kageyama said in one breath.

“And then?” Suga asked cautiously.

Kageyama cringed. “When I pulled away, he looked at me for a second, told me he had to go and ran away.”

Suga leaned on the table and rubbed his face. “Kageyama, you need to actually tell people you like them BEFORE you attack them with your face.”

“We did talk. A little. He said he dated guys before and that he wasn’t seeing anyone.” Kageyama exclaimed.

“Hate to break it to you, but just because Hinata has dated guys and is currently single doesn’t give you the right to up and kiss him without any explanation or warning.”

“I know. It's just that I’m not that great with words and I thought it would be… romantic, like in the movies.” Kageyama said quietly.

Suga studied Kageyama from across the table. His brow was furrowed and he held onto his tea cup like it was the only thing keeping him there. His shoulders slumped and his hair hung down in his face. Suga moved his chair around the table and next to Kageyama so that he could rub his back.

“That was sweet, Kageyama, but really stupid. I mean, really stupid. You can’t just go kissing people out of the blue.”

“So what do I do now?” Kageyama asked.

“You need to apologize first. And maybe give him some space this week. I know we have a bunch of practices scheduled, but you might want to try playing apart, at least until you can talk to him about it. It’s not a problem.”

Kageyama looked at Suga and he felt his heart stop. The deep blue of Kageyama’s eyes and the pleading way he looked at him made him think of Iwaizumi’s face in the Oikawa’s picture. Their expressions were different, the circumstances were different, but the seriousness and affection in their eyes was the same. Oikawa’s voice wove itself into the memory of the photo and Suga had a thought.

“Hey, how about you write him a song? And perform it at the show? That’ll be romantic, and you’ll get to tell him how you feel. At the very least, it’ll start an honest to god conversation between you two.”

Kageyama scrunched up his face. “I’ve never written a whole song before. Would you help me with the lyrics?”

Suga smiled. “I’d love to, but, you know what, you should ask Daichi for help with the lyrics.”

“Why Daichi?” Kageyama asked.

“Eh, the guy knows a thing or two about confessions,” Suga said with a wink.

Kageyama nodded and took another sip of tea.

“Speaking of Daichi, if he hears that you missed another class, he might not let you play at all this weekend…”

Suga swore he never saw anyone move as fast as Kageyama did as he pushed away from the table, thanked Suga for the help, and sprinted out the door.