Chapter 1
Inbox (05)
Instagram ([email protected])
Congratulations Clarke Griffin, you have recently reached a substantial milestone on your Instagram account and we would like to congratulate you on your success. Last night at 11:28pm your account’s follower total surpassed 10 000.
If there is anything we can do for you, please feel free to contact our help centre at [email protected] or log into one of our online help rooms.
Regards, Instagram.
(Do not reply to this email.)
Clarke smiles at the first email. She made her Instagram account three years ago when she really needed an outlet for all of the pent up creative energy she was carrying around. For the first two and a half years, she just uploaded her art whenever she felt the need to be creative. No matter how personal or meaningful the pieces were, she would upload them just to get the emotions out of her system and out into the open.
Not that she ever went into the meanings behind her art, she simply shared it via her Instagram and that was that.
It wasn't until six months ago that she noticed the rising popularity surrounding her account. To be completely honest, she doesn't really care how many people see her artwork, or even if they like it or not. But six months ago she realized that all of her uploads were bringing in more and more likes, and in turn earning her more and more followers.
At first she was slightly intimidated by the fact that two thousand people were following her account, and she felt pressured to keep producing new artwork regularly to share with her ‘fans.’
That lasted a total of five minutes, until she remembered the original reasons for creating the account in the first place, and ever since, she went back to uploading new artwork whenever she felt like it.
Six months later and she’s reading an email that’s telling her that she’s got ten thousand followers.
Clarke opens up Instagram to look at her latest upload. A few days ago her mother forced her to go along to a pseudo family reunion when she really didn't want to go. There were so many people there, most of them she hadn't had any contact with in years, and none of them were the one person that she wanted to see. None of them will ever be the one person she wants to see again.
She shakes her head of the depressing thoughts and focuses back on her latest creation, which she painted the night after returning home from the reunion.
It is a vague painting of outer space. There are abstract looking starts and planets in the background, but the focus of the piece is the motionless body floating in the middle. The person is indistinguishable. No name, no gender, no appearance. It’s just a figure floating alone in space.
She titled the painting “Lost” in reference to the lone figure floating in space. But in actuality in was more of a representation of her own mind. Her own soul.
Lost.
Shaking her head again to clear her mind, Clarke closes Instagram and goes back to her emails.
Clarkeeee!
I miss you so fucking much! This summer has gone so god damn slow without you! I'm regretting staying on campus instead of going home with you this year. This summer just wasn't the same without you and Raven.
Although I did go to a few parties (Yes, I kinda went alone, but you don’t know how bored I've been, stop judging me!) and met the cutest boy! We hung out together at a few of the parties and swapped numbers, and he’s taking me out on a date tomorrow night! He is so muscular and attractive, and his eyes are so deep and brown, and he has these tribal tattoos on his chest and arms, and-
Clarke zoned out at the description of Octavia’s latest eye candy and skipped through the rest of the description.
It was really long.
And really detailed.
Anyway, enough about my holidays. How has your summer been at home? How is everything with Mrs. G? How was the reunion? I hope you've been more social during your stay in D.C then you usually are here. We’re going into our third year for god’s sake! You should be having a bit of fun while you still can. I expect lots of stories about how many nights you've been too drunk to remember!
I can’t wait until you and Raven come back next week, I really want to hear about how her summer at space camp went, and I don’t know how much longer I can survive until I get to see your beautiful face again. ;)
Love, O. xxx
Clarke smiles again after she finishes reading. She’s happy to hear that Octavia is keeping herself entertained without either her or Raven there to look after her- Keep her company.
The smile fades however as she reads back over the parts where Octavia asks her about her summer. Clarke loves her friends and all, but they just don’t get her sometimes. They are all about the college life of sleeping all day, partying all night, and somehow fitting classes in between. But that’s just not Clarke’s scene.
She feels guilty sometimes because she feels like she holds her friends back. They want to go out to every party in a short dress with lots of make up when most nights she just wants to get her study done, then watch a movie with a glass of wine in trackies and a hoody and then try to sleep.
She’s tried countless times to explain it to them, but it always just earns her a “But we’re in college!” or a “You need to take a break and have a bit of fun.” She appreciates her friend’s attempts at ‘fixing’ her, but in reality they don’t even know what it is that they’re trying to fix… How could they, when Clarke herself doesn't even know what’s wrong with her.
More often than not, it’s simply easier for her to put on a happy face and pretend that everything is okay. She’s gotten so good at it that her friends have even stopped noticing when she’s faking it, which is most of the time…
Looking at the time to see that its 4am, Clarke sighs and decides to respond to the email later. In the meantime she goes back to checking the rest of her emails before she can go take a shower after a long day, and then night, of helping her mother out at the hospital.
RayRey ([email protected])
Hey girl!
One week to go. Can’t wait to see you again!
Sorry I haven’t been able to talk more, but this internship has been hectic! I've loved every minute of it though. I look forward to telling you all about it.
Love Raven. X
Raven’s email worked at cheering Clarke up a little bit. It’s nothing special, but it’s so typically Raven. Short and straight to the point. No time wasted, yet point gotten across.
She smiles slightly again, wondering how Raven’s summer has been at ‘space camp’ - as Octavia liked to label it – was going. It’s actually an intern ship at NASA and kind of a huge deal, but Raven was so nervous about it before the summer holidays, so playing it down as ‘space camp’ seemed to help her relax a bit.
After reading the emails from her best friends, Clarke realizes that she really misses them. It’s been a few months since she’s seen them. And even though they've kept in contact, it hasn't been much contact. Raven has been busy with the internship, Octavia has been busy being Octavia and Clarke herself has spent nearly every day working in the hospital with her mother.
Even though it was supposed to be her summer holidays, she decided that she wanted to get a head start on her volunteer hours working in a hospital under supervision, this way she wouldn't be as pushed for time when she went back to college, and the fact that it was her mother who’s supervision that she was working under made things a little easier. Somehow, the idea of getting her volunteer hours up, while maintaining all of her course work didn't sound appealing. She needs some time to sleep after all.
Following the realization of how much she misses her friends, she realizes that she is in fact rather exhausted. By this point, she has been up for almost twenty four hours straight, twenty of which were spent working at the hospital.
Fighting back a yawn, Clarke closes the email and looks to the next one down the list. She frowns slightly when she doesn't recognize who it’s from but opens it nonetheless and starts reading.
PenPalApp ([email protected])
Thank you for registering to partake in the beta testing period of PenPal, the newest and hottest up and coming App, trending on both the Apple and Android ‘coming soon’ lists.
We are pleased to inform you that you have been selected out of thousands of eager applications, to be one of the first users to get your hands on our new App.
During this testing period, you will have full access to all of the App’s features. Upon full release to the public, you, along with the other one hundred beta testers, will be offered a free lifetime account with our service as a thank you for all of your help.
For testing purposes, every account has been linked with one other account. This means that when both accounts have been activated, each user will receive a notification, and from there, PenPal is there for you to use at your leisure.
Brief Overview of Beta services:
- 100% anonymous messaging between linked accounts,
- free and unlimited voice communication between linked accounts,
- & unlimited (within reason) private online storage for sharing any photos or images between linked accounts.
Upon full release of PenPal, the above features and more will be available along with the random “find a friend” feature, which will link accounts based on our matching algorithms.
Thank you again for registering to partake in our beta testing period, and congratulation on being selected out of the thousands of people who applied.
We look forward to hearing from you with any feedback or concerns regarding our App at [email protected].
Regards, PenPal Team.
Click on this link to download PenPal and activate you’re Beta Account
“What the fuck…?” Clarke asks herself out loud.
She rereads the email, trying to figure out how it ended up in her inbox. She definitely did not remember signing up to help test this App.
But then how did her email get listed as one of the ‘lucky’ one hundred accounts selected?
She shrugs to herself, assuming it’s just some kind of spam that managed to dodge her spam filter. She closes the email and goes down to the final unopened email.
Monty G ([email protected])
Hey Clarke!
I hope you’re having a great summer visiting home, hopefully you’re not working yourself too hard and actually taking a bit of time to yourself to just relax. Knowing you though, you've probably been volunteering at the hospital all summer saving lives, so when you read this I hope you can take a few minutes and have a glass of wine for me!
The smile is back on Clarke's face again.
Classic Monty.
Out of everyone in her life, he is probably one of the only people who just accepts her broken self for who she is.
They’re not the closest of friends, but he always listens when they talk, and he never tries to push her into anything that she doesn't want to do. He just accepts her word and moves forward.
My summer has been okay. It started out a bit rough though. I finally came out and told my parents. They didn't take it very well at first, but after a couple days they realized what they were doing and quickly apologized and offered me their full support.
I almost wish that I didn't tell them, ever since I did, they've been begging me to introduce them to Nathan, but I don’t think I'm ready to let them try to intimidate him yet.
She smiles again.
Anyway, the main reason behind this email is to ask for your forgiveness… I don’t know if Jasper told you or not. But over the break we've been working together to develop an app called PenPal, -
Ohhhh…
- and I was in charge of sending out all of the Beta invitations. We set up an online application to find one hundred willing participants, which worked really well, considering we had over three thousand people apply.
But when I had a final list of the one hundred testers I didn't double check it before sending out all of the accounts… It was only afterwards that I realized that Jasper had replaced one of the applications with your details.
I'm really sorry and hope that you’re not too annoyed. You don’t have to download the app or do any of the testing, I can reset the account and send it out to one of the people who actually signed up for the testing.
Sorry again, Monty.
ps. can’t wait to see you and the girls back at Arkadia :D
Well now that explains the previous email. While it’s typical for Monty to be considerate and understanding, it’s just as typical for Jasper to be pushy and annoying. He usually has good intentions though, she begrudgingly admits to herself.
After thinking it over for a few minutes, she hits reply to Monty’s email and types out a quick message.
To: ([email protected])
Hey Monty!
It’s good to hear from you. I hope you’re having a great summer break and I'm so glad that things worked out with your parents. I'm proud of you for having the courage to tell them.
You were right – as usual – about the busy day thing. I've just gotten home after like 20 hours working in the ER with mom. I think it’s a bit late for a glass of wine, but next chance I get, I’ll definitely have one on you.
Also, don’t worry about cancelling the account. From the acceptance email it seems like you and Jasper have put a lot of work into this and I’d be honoured to help you guys out.
See you next week!
Clarke :D
She hesitated for a moment before actually hitting the send button, but decided to just go with it and click the button. Normally she wouldn't really be into the idea of this PenPal app that they've got set up, it seems a bit too much like tinder for her tastes, but Monty and Jasper are two of her closest friends, so she decides to just show her support by going along with it.
It’s just chatting to some random person for a couple weeks that she’s never actually going to meet, shouldn't be any issues.
With a shrug of her shoulders, she opens the PenPal email on her phone and clicks the link. The email app closes and after a few seconds a new app opens.
The title screen has a neat little animation and a fancy looking title, she’s actually kinda impressed. After a couple seconds it fades to a log in screen. The ‘username’ section is greyed over and already filled out with her email address, but the password section is blank, with small red writing below it that says, ‘please enter a password between 6 and 12 characters long.’
She thinks for a few seconds before deciding on her password, after typing it in, she hit’s the ‘finalize account’ button and the screen quickly changes to what she assumes is the main menu.
There are a few options that she can see on the screen, but most of it is covered by a notification.
'Thank you for being a part of the PenPal Beta testing period. You will be notified as soon as your testing partner has activated their account.’
With nothing else to do, she closes the app and puts her phone on the charger. Going back to her laptop she closes out of her email, deciding to reply to the other messages in the morning, then closes it and also puts it on charge.
She grabs some pyjamas and a towel and heads out of her room to have a quick shower.
Fifteen minutes later she collapses into her bed feeling a bit better with clean hair and minty breath.
She turns off her light and closes her eyes, minutes later she is fast asleep.
Unfortunately for Clarke though, she won’t get to rest for long. It’s already 4:30 am and her alarm is set to wake her up again at 7am.
It’s another twenty hour day in the ER with her mother and Clark is exhausted by the time that she finally collapses into bed. She only got a few hours’ of sleep the previous morning before she had to get up and go again.
She is thankful that she has the rest of the summer break off to relax. It was her final day of volunteering at the hospital with her mother yesterday, and now she is looking forward to a few days of relaxation before going back for another year of college.
Just as she turns the light out and closes her eyes to get some much needed sleep, she is distracted by the sound of her phone vibrating a few times on the bedside table.
With a groan she rolls over to receive her phone before unlocking it to see who the hell messaged her at 4:30am.
When she unlocked the phone though, she was surprised to see that it wasn't a message, but a notification.
‘PenPal: You’re testing partner has activated their account. All services previously mentioned to you are now available at your leisure. We hope you enjoy the use of our app and if you have any issues, concerns or feedback, please feel free to contact us at [email protected].’
Inbox (03)
Instagram ([email protected])
This is an automatic notification to let you know that Clarke Griffin has uploaded a new photo to Instagram. You have elected to receive notifications when this user uploads new content, if you would like to cancel this feature, email “Stop” To [email protected].
Regards, Instagram.
(Do not reply to this email.)
Lexa closes out of her email and opens Instagram up in a new tab. Normally, she isn't the kind of person who uses any of these social media platforms, but when her brother showed her this girls Instagram a few months ago, she couldn't not make an account to follow her. Her artwork is amazing.
When the page loads, she navigates it to bring up Clarke Griffin’s page and scrolls down to click on the newest upload.
“Lost.”
She isn't really that into art, but that doesn't mean that she can’t admire the way the dark blue and blacks meld together to create an abstract image of space. It doesn't mean that she can’t admire the soft and subtle stars and planets in the background, that are more likely there to let people know that it’s actually outer space than anything else. And it doesn't mean that she can’t admire the way that the painting draws her focus to the lone figure, floating, motionlessly, lifelessly in the centre or the painting.
Lost.
The way this person composes her art, it just hits a cord within her. It’s like the paintings, or drawings, have two levels. There’s the obvious layer on top, that is meant to look pretty and eye-catching, but there’s also the deep and more meaningful layer hidden beneath. The layer that only those who can relate to the artists emotions will ever be able to see.
Either that, or she is just reading way too far into a simple painting of a lone figure floating in space.
Lexa sighs and scrolls down to look at some of the other uploads from this Clarke Griffin person.
Ten minutes later, Lexa is still scrolling through different pieces of artwork. Every piece that has been uploaded, be it drawings or paintings, are all beautiful. She admits to herself that this person is an extremely talented artist, and wonders if art is what they do for a living.
She also wonders why she gets the same feelings from every single piece of artwork. At first she almost smiles at the beauty of the piece, but after a few seconds of actually looking at it, all of it, she realizes that the meaning behind the piece is nothing to smile at.
She wonders if the artist suffers from depression. From the vibes Lexa is picking up from the artwork, it would certainly seem that way. Most people probably wouldn't see it, but Lexa does. She can relate after all.
She shakes her head to clear her mind. She goes back to the top of the page and likes the latest upload before closing the tab and checking the time.
4:15am.
She sighs again and rubs her eyes with the palms of her hands.
It’s been a long day.
Mostly spent going over case files to help her father with the latest case take by their families law firm.
Deciding to just go back to her emails so that she can get it over with and try to get some sleep, she scrolls down to see the next email is from her brother.
Lincoln ([email protected])
Lex!
How’s the break going for you at home? Dad told me that you've been working your ass off helping out at the firm, he also told me that you have used barely any of your summer to actually relax. Come on! You've got ONE week left until you have to go back for another year of law school, try to take a bit of a break. Please.
I know we haven’t been as close as we could have been for the past year, but I do care about you little sister, and I do worry… You always act cool and collected, but I know that beneath it you’re still holding onto the past. You need to let go and move forward, and I just want to be there to help you be happy again. You do know that right?
She sighs and adopts a small frown on her face. As much as she’s perfected her mask of cool indifference to the world around her, her brother can always manage to see straight through her.
It’s not the first time that he’s tried getting through to her like this, telling her that she needs to move forward, accept the past and be happy again. But it’s just not that easy. He just doesn't understand. How could he?
My break has been pretty good. You know, because I've actually taken a break and relaxed.
The party scene has been good this summer. Great weather, great company, loud music and lots to drink. I expect to see you actually attending some parties this year by the way, starting with my birthday bash the first weekend after colleges starts up again. I don’t care if I have to drag you along, I won’t let you just lock yourself away and study non stop for another year.
I also met someone at one of these parties. She’s great and I think you’d really like her. We've hung out a bunch at different parties and I'm taking her out on a date soon to see how we go outside of a college party. Hopefully if all goes to plan, I’ll be introducing her to you as my girlfriend when you come back to Arkadia next week.
Give Mom and Dad my love, see you next week.
Lincoln.
ps. I signed you up to try out this new app that randomly pairs you up with someone to talk to anonymously. Before you crack the shits at me, there’s only like, one hundred spots open for the testing, and from what I've heard, thousands of people have signed up, so chances are you won’t even get selected. IF you do though, PLEASE give it a chance. I know you hate talking to new people, but who knows, you might end up making a really good friend through this. Just give it a chance if you get chosen.
With narrowed eyes and a slight frown, Lexa releases a slight sigh. It’s so typical of Lincoln to sign her up for something like this without her knowledge or permission. At least the odds of her being chosen aren't really in her favour, so she won’t have to feel bad about ignoring her brother’s request.
That idea goes down the drain though when she closes the email and looks to the final unread email in her inbox.
PenPalApp ([email protected])
Thank you for registering to partake in the beta testing period of PenPal, the newest and hottest up and coming App, trending on both the Apple and Android ‘coming soon’ lists.
We are pleased to inform you that you have been selected out of thousands of eager applications, to be one of the first users to get your hands on our new App.
During this testing period, you will have full access to all of the App’s features. Upon full release to the public, you, along with the other one hundred beta testers, will be offered a free lifetime account with our service as a thank you for all of your help.
For testing purposes, every account has been linked with one other account. This means that when both accounts have been activated, each user will receive a notification, and from there, PenPal is there for you to use at your leisure.
Brief Overview of Beta services:
- 100% anonymous messaging between linked accounts,
- free and unlimited voice communication between linked accounts,
- & unlimited (within reason) private online storage for sharing any photos or images between linked accounts.
Upon full release of PenPal, the above features and more will be available along with the random “find a friend” feature, which will link accounts based on our matching algorithms.
Thank you again for registering to partake in our beta testing period, and congratulation on being selected out of the thousands of people who applied.
We look forward to hearing from you with any feedback or concerns regarding our App at [email protected].
Regards, PenPal Team.
Click on this link to download PenPal and activate you’re Beta Account
She sighs again and contemplates her options. On one hand she can just delete the email and pretend that she never received it, that way if her brother asks her, she can just lie and say that the application wasn't accepted.
But on the other hand, if she does that, then what happens to the person that her account is supposedly linked to? Does that person just miss out on the chance to test the app? Or will they be paired up with someone else?
Well they can only be paired up with someone else if the other person’s partner ignored the email as well. But why would any of the other people in the beta bother applying if they didn't actually want to participate in the testing?
That being said, theoretically, the ninety nine other people actually want to be testers for this app, so if she ignores the email, then that means that someone else will miss out because of her.
She has no interest in finding a new friend or talking to some random stranger.
But it would be selfish of her to just ignore it, and as much as she tries to come off as cool and indifferent around people, she isn't actually a selfish person.
So with her mind finally made up, she lets out a sigh, checks the time to see that it’s 4:29am. Shen then opens the email on her phone, and clicks the link to download the app.
After navigating her way to the log in screen, she sees her email already entered as the username, and types in a standard password that she uses for most of her online accounts. After she hits the ‘finalize account’ button, the screen changes and brings up a new notification.
‘Thank you for being a part of the PenPal Beta testing period. You will be notified as soon as your testing partner has activated their account.’
With another sigh and plea to an unknown deity that she won’t regret this decision, she plugs her phone into the charger beside her, turns off the lamp on her bedside table and gets under the covers of her bed.
A few seconds later, just as she closes her eyes, she hears her phone vibrate beside her.
With a groan she wonders who the fuck is messaging her at 4:30am and reaches for her phone. When she unlocks it however, she realizes that it isn't a message at all.
It’s a notification.
‘PenPal: You’re testing partner has activated their account. All services previously mentioned to you are now available at your leisure. We hope you enjoy the use of our app and if you have any issues, concerns or feedback, please feel free to contact us at [email protected].’