Tainted Heart

It has been a very long week. Hope has had a busy week at work, meaning their second date had not yet been able to happen. Kelley was really disappointed to say the least.

They had seen each other when Hope would stop by to grab her morning coffee and they had been exchanging text messages and late night calls. Hope would fall asleep and Kelley would just stay in the line listening to her breathing. It wasn't weird at all, that's what Kelley had told herself. She would tease Hope the next day about it, telling her that her snoring had kept her awake all night. At first, Hope had been embarrassed at the thought of Kelley hearing her snore, but after that she would just roll her eyes at the younger girl's teasing.

The week went by fast, slow if you asked Kelley. Hope had texted Kelley telling her that she wouldn't be able to stop for coffee but she was most likely to get off work early. They decided to try and have their second date that night,with the promise that if anything changed, Hope would let Kelley know.

Hope was furiously sending glares towards her boss Abby Wambach. She was expecting to get off of work early and finally get to spend time with Kelley. Her boss had another idea.

"I hate her," Hope said, "it can wait until tomorrow. Why does it have to be ready by tonight?"

"Because she said so." Hope was now sending glares Carli's way.

"Ugh! I hate you too," she stated while starting to put her stuff away.

"At least she's letting you take it home and finish it there, she could have easily made you stay here and finish it." Carli said starting to do the same and put her stuff away, both getting ready to head out.

"Yes but I had plans to go out tonight. I umm...had a date with Kelley," she said starting to walk away from Carli.

"Wait up!!" Carli yelled, lightly jogging to catch up to Hope, "so a second date huh?"

"Not anymore," she let out a sigh.

"You look very disappointed, that girl's got you hooked!" Carli let out a chuckle.

"Why don't you just invite her over? Make some dinner and hang out, then call it a night, send her home and you can work on that article you need to finish after she leaves." Hope thought about it. They reached their cars, and Hope turned to Carli.

"Carli that's the best idea you have ever had!" She hugged Carli, "I hope she's ok with doing that though....anyways, thanks, a lot! I will see you tomorrow morning." she unlocked her car and got in, and without waiting for Carli to say anything back, she drove off.

"Yeah bye!" Carli yelled knowing she definitely didn't hear her.

The first thing Hope did when she got home was call Kelley.

"Hellooo." Kelley answered after a couple of rings.

"Hey Kell." Hope was now going through her kitchen cabinets trying to see what she could scrape together for dinner.

"Hey Hopey!" Kelley said excitedly. She could almost see Hope rolling her eyes at the nickname.

"Why do I like you?" she said jokingly.

"Because there's no one in this world that can dislike me! I'll have you know that I'm very likeable Hopey." Kelley said trying to sound serious and Hope just laughed at the girls dorkiness.

"Anyways, I was calling to let you down really," she paused briefly to collect her thoughts, "I have an article I need to work on tonight soo..." She waited for Kelley to say something. She heard her sigh at the other end of the line.

"It's ok .. I uh..I mean work is work. I was really looking forward to seeing you for more than five minutes though," she sounded very disappointed, and Hope was too, but she was hoping Kelley would say yes to having dinner at her house.

"Well about that, it's still early and if I start to work on it right now, I could be half finished by six. So I was hoping you might wanna come over and do dinner at my place? I mean only if you want to... I mean if it's weird since it's only the second date we could always jus-" her rambling was cut off by Kelley.

"Yes I would love to have dinner with you at your place, but only if you let me cook for you?" Kelley said lighting up at the idea of spending alone time with Hope.

"I can't belive I'm agreeing to this but okay," she was now smiling too, excited about seeing the freckled girl, "if I die because of you I'm coming back to haunt you forever."

"I take offense to that! I'll have you know I'm a pretty decent cook." She said and heard Hope laugh at the other end.

"Decent? Oh yeah that makes me feel so much better about eating your food." Hope chuckled. "Do you remeber where I live?"

"Yes ma'am I do" Kelley said in her best southerner accent, "I will text you when I'm heading over, bye Hopey!"

"Bye Kell..." Hope said rolling her eyes, yet again, at the nickname.

Kelley decided to stop at a Chinese place Hope had told her was her favorite place for take out. She got to thinking: if she cooked, she might not have that much time to actually spend with Hope. So here she was getting take out. After getting her order she drove to Hope's place. It was a little past six when she took a wrong turn and she spent a good fifteen minutes to get back in the right direction of Hope's place.

Hope, on the other hand, was freaking out a little. Sure it was only twenty minutes that Kelley was late, but what if this was pay back? It couldn't be, Kelley doesn't seem like that kind of person. Hope just sat there in her living room trying to work as much on her article while waiting for Kelley. She had thought about calling to make sure she was okay, but decided against it. Soon enough, she heard a car pull up and she broke into a big smile.

Kelley was about to ring the door bell when the door flew open. To say she got a little scared is an understatement.

"Jesus Christ woman you scared me!" Kelley exclaimed, her free hand resting against her chest feeling her heart beat fast.

"Oh...I umm I'm so sorry I didn't mean to scare you I just ...I heard you pull up an-" Kelley let out a laugh.

"Hey, you're good. I was just a bit startled but I'm good." Kelley brought the take out bag up to Hope's face, "Brought your favorite, hope you're hungry!"

"Oh come in, I'm sorry how rude of me." She followed Kelley to her kitchen, "Wait I thought you were cooking, what's this?"

"Well you know me and my great ideas! So I thought; why waste time cooking when I can just get take out and spend more time with you instead of in the kitchen!?" she smiled deviously and winked at Hope, who just smiled.

"I like the way you think, and you remebered my favorite place," Hope went to grab some forks and a couple waters from the fridge, "want to eat in the living room? Couches are more comfortable..."

"Sounds good to me," she grabbed the take out bag and walked over to the living room. Hope following closely behind.

Hope turned on the TV to some random news channel. It was mostly for background sound.

"Didn't know exactly what you'd like so I got some stuff the girl recommend. Hope you like it." Kelley said hoping she wasn't one of those picky eaters.

"Honestly, anything from that place is good. Thank you so much for coming over. It's really good to see you," she looked at Kelley and smiled. They stared for a few seconds before Hope tipped her head down and smiled.

It was the cutest thing Kelley had ever seen. She scooted over closer to Hope and put her hand under Hope's chin to lift her head up. Her hand went to Hope's cheek and slowly she leaned in giving her a chaste kiss on her lips. She pulled back a little when she was pulled in again by Hope's hand on the back of her head.

The kiss was a little more this time, their lips moving perfectly together. Kelley's other hand went up to the other side of Hope's face. They came up for much needed air. Hope rested her forehead against Kelley's, still holding her in place.

"Hi," she said feeling a little lightheaded after the kiss.

"Hi," Kelley breathed out, "I could definitely get used to this." Kelley grabbed Hope's hand, resting it in her lap.

"Me too...." was all Hope said, letting go of Kelley's hand only to miss the warmth as soon as she'd let go, "but food needs to be eaten, and I am as hungry as a wolf!"

"Gosh you sound like Tobin," Kelley said laughing at the memory of her friend saying stuff like that when she's hungry.

"Is that your other friend from the bar?" Hope asked.

"Yeah. They live in Portland and that was the first time I've seen them since they moved there. They went back Monday, I'm hoping to go visit them soon though, I miss them already." Kelley said taking a bite of her food "Holy damn this is good Hope!"

"Told you." Hope said matter-of-factly before continuing, "That's great. I'm happy you got to see them again."

"Yeah me too," Kelley was stuffing her face. When she realized what she was doing, she looked over at Hope who was just staring with amusement at the freckled face girl.

"That good huh!?" Hope asked.

"Mmhm!" Kelley said with a mouthful of food.

After eating and cleaning the living room, Hope showed Kelley to the backyard where there was a swing seat. Hope quickly went to the kitchen to grab them each a beer. When she was walking back out to the yard, she noticed Kelley sitting at the swing seat looking up with her eyes closed.

Hope could only stare and smile at the younger girl. She really liked Kelley, everything about the woman sitting in the swing seat waiting for her was beautiful.

"Hey." Kelley opened one eye and looked to where Hope was standing.

"Hey what are you doing?" Hope said taking a seat close to Kelley and handed her a beer.

"Just enjoying the night, it feels peaceful," she said taking a drink out of her beer and swinging her arm over Hopes shoulders, "and the company only makes it better. Thanks for inviting me, I'm glad I came."

"I'm glad you came too." Hope relaxed into Kelley, "can I tell you something?"

"You can tell me anything." She said smiling over at Hope.

"I know it's only been a week or so since we've know eachother but I really, really like you. I know I've said that before but I mean it. I've never felt this kind of connection with anyone."

"I know what you mean. This is probably gonna sound weird but ever since the first day I met you, I told myself that I would do anything to get to know you. Because I just knew you were going to be something special in my life," Kelley said with sincerity in her voice. Hope moved so that she was facing Kelley and intertwined their hands. She smiled timidly at Kelley.

"I've been thinking about you since the first day I met you. I know it's crazy but I just can't seem to get you off my mind, and I'm ok with that." Hope said looking down at their intertwined hands, "But I'm not sure I'm ready for anything too serious. I just got out of a relationship, and it's not that I'm not over him, I've been over him for months really. I just don't want to screw this up, I want to take it slow."

"Hey I'm not asking for a relationship off the bat, we're dating right? We'll take it slow, I'm in the same boat as you. I was in a relationship a few months ago that didn't end pretty at all. I want to make sure I'm ready too." Kelley brought one of her hands to Hope's chin and made her look up.

She leaned in and placed another chaste kiss on her lips. When she was about to pull away she felt Hope's hand in the back of her neck pulling her in for another deep kiss. This was not something she was going to complain about. Hope's other hand found it's way to Kelley's thigh and she felt Kelley tense a little but relaxed right away.

"Mmm I could definitely get used to this." Kelley said and felt Hope smile into the kiss.

It was late, and Hope was a little sad that Kelley had to leave. She wouldn't mind if Kelley wanted to stay, but she had an article to finish. And with Kelley here, that wouldn't get done. She was too much of an enticing distraction for Hope.

Especially not after their heated make out session in the swing seat. Hope didn't want to stop but she reminded herself that they were trying to take things slow.

"Are you sure you don't want to stay for another hour or two or you know..." Hope said grabbing Kelley's shirt and pulling her towards her.

"Or I know?" Kelley said with a grin in her face, "Hope Solo are you asking me to spend the night on our second date? What kind of girl do you take me for?" Kelley said pretending to be insulted.

"I..uh no I mean I didn't mean it like that we umm oh my god I'm so-" she was cut off by Kelleys lips on hers.

"Hey I'm kidding! I like getting you all nervous and worked up, its cute." Kelley said. "Anyways, I'm afraid I can't stay. You need to finish that article, and I would only be distracting you, so I'm gonna go." Hope was pouting now and if Kelley thought she couldn't get any more cuter, well she was wrong. A pouting Hope was the cutest thing ever.

"Oh come on! Stop pouting and walk me to my car." Kelley said, turning and pulling Hope with her to the door.

"I'm not pouting, I don't pout." Hope stopped and pulled Kelley back into her and started kissing her neck. Kelley turned back around and placed a lazy kiss on Hope's lips.

"Oh believe me, you pout, and it's the cutest thing I've seen in my entire life." Kelley walked outside to her car, this time pulling a willing Hope with her.

"Call me when you get home?" Hope asked giving Kelley a hug. She felt herself not wanting to let go.

"Yes ma'am, will do!" Kelley said her southern accent coming out. Hope just laughed at her.

"Bye Kell," Hope said placing a kiss on Kelley's lips.

"Mmm why am I leaving again?" she brought Hope's lips back to her when she was pulling away.

"Article...you...distraction." Hope said between kisses.

"Ugh I hate your boss," Kelley said pulling away before she changed her mind and stayed.

"Believe me, I hate her more." She open the door to Kelley's car so she could get in. Kelley smiled at Hope.

"Goodnight Kell, don't forge-" she was interrupted by Kelley.

"I know call you when I get home, I will. Good night Hopey!" Hope was about to say something about the nickname but Kelley rolled up her window waving goodbye.

Kelley called Hope as soon as she pulled in the driveway of her brother's house. They talked for another thirty minutes before Kelley reminded her she had a article to write. So they said their goodnight's again and hung up.

A month went by and they were great. They would talk to each other every night. Hope would stop by almost every morning for coffee, and to see Kelley more than anything. They went on their third and fourth date. After the fourth date, they would hang out more than the usual. Kelley would come over to Hope's during the weekends. During the week, Hope had been too busy to do anything. They would just hang out, talk for hours, drink wine and beers, make out like two teenagers. They were still trying to take things slow so it would never be more than just kissing and maybe some grinding a little.

They were both happy with how things were going. Not rushing into anything, just getting to know eachother.

One Friday morning, Kelley was at work when she received a text from Hope.

Hope- Hey beautiful how does a fancy dinner tonight sound? ;) There's this great Italian place I've been wanting to go to... What do you say?

Kelley smiled at the text and looked up to see Tim grinning at her. She looked down at her phone and started to type.

Kelley - Sounds like a date ;)

She got a fast response from Hope.

Hope- Great pick you up at 7 :)

Kelley was about to type back when she heard the door to the Bean open and to say she was surprised at who had walked through the door was an understatement.

Kelley was confused. She didn't know what to think. She just stood there, frozen in place, staring at the brunette walking her way. She wanted to run to, get away, but she couldn't move.

"Hey Kells," the brunette said reaching Kelley and pulling her into a hug, "I've missed you."

"Sarah what... um what are you doing here? Why are you here?" Kelley said pulling away roughly from the hug.

"What do you mean why am I here? For you silly! I meant it when I said I needed time to figure out my feelings and when I was ready in would come back to you," she said smiling at Kelley.

Kelley was confused and a little pissed to be honest. Was she crazy? Did she really think she would just be here waiting for her to figure her shit out? She grabbed her by the hand and pulled her out the door, not before telling Tim she was taking a break. He just nodded completely lost on what was going on. When they were outside, Kelley let go of her hand.

"Are you kidding me? Who-why would you think I'd be here like an idiot waiting? I've moved on Sarah. You hurt me too much for me to even think about waiting for you to figure your shit out, meant it when I said I was done." Kelley was trying hard not to cry.

"You don't mean that Kell. I still love you and I'm here now, I want to be with yo-" Kelley cut her off.

"With me and who else? Because there's always someone else," Kelley said harshly, "I've moved on Sarah. don't you get it? Please just leave."

She walked over to Kelley and placed a hand on her cheek caressing it. She got closer and closer until she was inches away from Kelley's lips.

"I love you Kell and I've never stopped. I'm here and I want make things right with you." She leaned in and placed a kiss on Kelley's lips. After a couple seconds Kelley pulled away, not letting her try and deepen the kiss. She was done, she had been for a while now. She was happy with what she had with Hope, even though they hadn't made it official. Sarah's hand was still against her cheek and she was about to lean in again when she heard someone clear her throat behind her.

When Kelley turned around and saw the hurt in Hope's eyes she felt her world crashing down.

"I'm sorry, didn't mean to interrupt." Hope said her voice filled with hurt. She turned around and started walking back the way she had come.

"Wait Hope!" Kelley said reaching for Hope and grabbing her hand. Hope pulled it away looking down.
"Let me explain, this isn't what it looks like I swe-" she was cut off by Hope.

"Isn't what it looks like Kelley? You were just kissing her what am I supposed to think it is? I..I need to go." Hope turned around and headed for her car.

"Just let me explain please." Kelley asked, her voice breaking at the end.

"I just .....I how? Why? I mean...I thought we had something special between us, or was that just me?" Hope said without looking at Kelley.

"Kell what's going on? Who is this?" Sarah walked over to where Hope and Kelley were standing. Kelley turned around to tell Sarah to get lost when she heard a car door close. She turned back around in time to see Hope was in her car about to drive away.

"Wait ...Hope!"

"Seriously who was that?" Sarah asked and when Kelley turned around she had a look on her face Sarah had never seen before. Kelley was pissed off and almost crying.

"You need to leave. I don't want you in my life anymore. You've hurt me enough, I'm done with you Sarah! Get it through your head. I'm fucking done! I don't love you. I hate you for what you did to me, you broke me. Just fucking leave! Get out of my life! I'm happy, and your ruining it like you ruined everything, so please for god fucking sakes, just let me live my life. I've moved on damn it." There were now tears running down her cheeks, she started to walk away and stop when she heard Sarah laugh.

"Oh come on Kelley, you don't really believe that do you? I know you still love me, you'll come back begging me to take you back like you always do." Kelley was about to say something but she decided against it so she just walked away.

"You'll regret this Kell!" Sarah yelled, but Kelley wasn't hearing any of it.

She went back to the café and headed straight to the restroom. She called Hope a few times, every single one going straight to voice mail. With every voice mail she got she started to panic more and more, she sunk onto the floor and started crying. Sarah had been the one for her back then, she had seen herself married to her in the future. That was until she had cheated on her, multiple times, and every single one of those times Kelley had forgiven her.

Sarah had ruined her heart for anyone until Hope came along. Kelley had really strong feelings for Hope. She wouldn't admit it to her yet because they were still taking things slow, but Hope had fixed her heart in a way that she never thought was possible anymore. And now Sarah had ruined that for her too. She hated the way Hope had looked at her with so much heartbreak shown in her eyes.

"Come on Hope please pick up," she whispered dialing one last time, hoping to hear her melodic voice. Hope didn't, she couldn't.

Hope wasn't a crier at all. Why would she cry? It's not like they were official. She told herself that like a mantra. Yet it hurt so much seeing her kiss that girl, the way they looked at each other. But she was going to make it official tonight, she was going to ask Kelley to be her girlfriend. What was she supposed to do now? She felt a tear run down her cheek. She wiped it off quickly, she wasn't a crier. She wasn't going to let this hurt her. Yet it did, it hurt like hell.

Her phone went off and when she saw who it was she grabbed it and ignored the call. Instead, she sent a text to Carli to come over to her house when she could, and then she turned it off. She needed her friend. This wasn't supposed to hurt her this much, yet here she was hurting and Kelley was the reason.