Chapter 9
Chapter 9
All she could smell was smoke, and the burning of wood around her. Mikasa had yet to open her eyes; not that she wanted to. Yet she was confused, she slowly lifted her heavy eye lids. It was foggy around her, and she was lying down on a smashed window. Underneath, a littered floor covered with leaves, and bits of broken glass. Mikasa didn’t even want to try and sit up, as her leg and shoulder ached terribly. She glanced up in front of her, to where she only greeted with one seat, the other clearly had been ripped from its position, yet she didn’t know where it had gone.
She soon came to the realization that the coach was tipped onto its left side, and tears welled up in her eyes. She let them leak down her face, and she tried to sit up. However, she couldn’t move. Looking down her body, she found that her leg, the one that had been aching, was trapped under the missing seat. Mikasa couldn’t reach to move it, nor was she even strong enough. Panicked filled her mind as much as the smoke had in her nose. She found herself struggling to breathe, and gasped for air, to try and call for someone.
Mikasa hacked up a cough from deep within her lungs, as she desperately tried to call out for someone. “H...Help! Someone, anyone? Please,” She lay back down on the glass, which she was certain had cut her back up, but she didn’t care. Her leg was throbbing too much for her to even notice. She could wiggle it, so it wasn’t broken or squashed, which was a slight relief.
The injured raven tried looking through the gaps of what remained of the chairs behind her, to see if they were still there. From what she could lay her eyes upon, the coach was cluttered, and there was blood. Mikasa could see blood.
“Eren...Eren? Eren are you there? Armin...? A-Anyone?” She said shakily, sobbing.
No response. Her eyes flickered around from what she could see at her view point, and they landed on something diagonally above her. Suspended from their seat belts, were Connie and Sasha. They hung there, lifeless, slowly swinging like piñatas. Color had left them, drained through loss of blood, which Mikasa had just noticed that it covered her. So she shrieked. And howled. She screamed her lungs out, in fear of being the last one here. That she would perish here, like they had. She panicked at how many were left alive. What if she was the only one left...?
Rustles of leaves could be heard outside, through the top of the coach. “Armin, I definitely heard something,”
Mikasa’s eyes shot open as soon as she heard the worry and sobs through Eren’s voice.
“No you didn’t, please, let’s just leave, I can’t be here anymore-“
“EREN! HELP ME!” Mikasa shouted as loud as she could. Bangs on the top of the coach were followed after she had voiced that she was alive.
“Mikasa...MIKASA? Is that you? Oh god, please say it’s you!”
She tried to sit up to get closer to the top of the coach, so her shaky voice could be more audible and clear. “Yes, it’s me! Please, please come and help me! My legs stuck, and I don’t know if it’s broken and...and...” She allowed herself time to let out a sob. “Please help me!”
Crunching sounds could be heard, and they were getting quieter and quieter. Mikasa refrained from looking upward, so shut her eyes, still letting the tears fall down.
Suddenly, a loud bang was heard, coming from in front of the seat in front of Mikasa. She looked through the gap, and saw that the top of the coach had been dented.
“Eren, please be careful! It’s okay Mikasa, we’re coming,” Armin said reassuringly, although he also had his own share of sobs. She then heard a small snap above her head, and reluctantly looked up to see Connie closer to her then he was before.
“Please hurry!” Mikasa said, scrunching her eyes up into tight balls of water. Finally, the coach gave way to Eren’s persistent bashing. He stepped inside, covering his eyes slightly. He made his way carefully to her, and his own eyes filled with water looking at the state she was in. Without any thought for himself, Eren immediately lifted the seat that covered her leg, almost knocking Connie in the process.
He knelt down next to her to check if she was injured anywhere else. “Can you walk?”
Mikasa shook her head, which led to Eren picking her up bridal style, also picking up her bag which was luckily found next to her, and carrying her out of the coach. Once he was reunited with Armin outside, the three took a look at what was their ride.
It was tipped on its side, and had clearly crashed into a few trees on the way down. Mikasa’s gripped Eren’s shirt as some sort of support, although it didn’t help much. The trio let out sobs, and silent head shakes of disbelief.
“Is...is it just us?” Mikasa questioned, not really wanting to hear the answer.
“Yeah...I-I think so,” Armin said gulping. “When we checked, everyone was...they were...” He held an arm over his eyes, finishing his sentence with a cry.
Mikasa looked up at Eren, who was crying, but still in utter disbelief, like it hadn’t happened.
“What do we do now...?”
“The only thing we can do,” Eren said in a broken voice, “Walk until we find help,” He said gripping onto tighter to Mikasa’s legs, as he turned around, Armin following suit.
Thoughts of how or why this happened abruptly came into her mind. This was her fault; all of this. Her selfishness had gotten the better of her, and she had killed all of those innocent people. If Eren or Armin found out, they’d hate her for sure. She turned her head back slightly to see the damage she caused, to see all the dead people she was being carried away from. This factor made her cry harder, yet Eren and Armin never questioned her about this. They let her cry.
Mikasa woke up with a jolt, startling herself. She sat up immediately, getting familiar with her surroundings. She wasn’t at home. She began to look around the room. Posters of games and movies took center stage in whoever's room this was. It was a little messy, with clothes being around the floor, and empty rubbish packets of snacks were surrounding the bin. There was a desk that had a laptop occupying it, and a shitty brown swivel chair was placed neatly underneath. She then turned to the nightstand, which had a broken lamp on it, and a stack of magazines, some to do with gaming, and others to do with porn. Whoever this was clearly had no shame.
She stretched, swinging her legs over the bed, as she rubbed her eyes, trying to forget the horrible dream she had. Yet, it was no dream, more like a flashback. Mikasa wondered if it was her PTSD coming back again, but chose to ignore it.
Grabbing onto the door handle, she opened the door slowly, still unsure of where she was. Panic left her as soon as she found out she was in Eren and Armin’s apartment. Familiar surroundings greeted her, as well as Armin, Annie and Eren.
“Morning, sleepy head,” Eren met her with a cheesy grin. Mikasa’s eyebrows scrunched in confusion.
“Someone care to explain what I’m doing here,” She looked down at her clothing suddenly, to find she was wearing an over sized Game of Thrones t-shirt, “And why I’m suddenly a fan of Game of Thrones?”
Armin sat down next to Eren on the couch, eating some toast while Eren sipped a milkshake. Annie was busy making coffee, once again.
“Ah yes, well, you fell asleep on the car ride back here, and it was late and night and we didn’t want to wake you, so we came to the decision just to let you sleep. We then realized we didn’t know where you lived, so the next best thing was just to let you sleep here. Eren gave up his bed for you, would you know,”
Mikasa gave an approving nod, folding her arms. “Thank you, Eren. Was the couch comfy?”
“Oh, as comfy as they get.”
She giggled. “And the t-shirt?” Armin pointed to Eren. Mikasa’s raised her eye brows. “Oh god, you didn’t undress me did you?”
“What? No! You would get too hot sleeping in my coat, but I didn’t want you to freeze as the heating is shit here, so I just pulled that over your head. Be grateful.” He said, as he continued to sip nonchalantly.
“I see,”
Annie’s way of greeting was the best; a hot cup of freshly made coffee. She smiled as she handed it to her, before sitting next to Armin. Mikasa, standing up, sipped her coffee. As much as she would have liked to gulp it down in hopes of forgetting her horrible dreamy flashback, it was too hot to do so.
The door bell rung, and everyone besides the raven groaned. “I’ll get it,” Mikasa said, making her way over to the door.
“No, don’t!”
It was too late for that, as Mikasa had already managed to open the door. Her face dropped, wishing she had groaned with the others when Jean’s flirty grin awaited her.
“Hello there, Mikasa.”
She rolled her eyes, shuffling to go and find a seat on the couch.
“You’re too fucking early,” Eren said, moaning once more.
“Nice to know when I’m wanted. Gee, I have the best friends a guy could ask for. Say Annie, you didn’t happen to save any coffee-“
“It’s in the pot.”
Jean fist pumped the air, making his way over to the cupboard to get out a cup. “So, did you guys manage to find those documents you were after?”
Armin sighed. “Yes, I managed to, anyway. Eren and Mikasa were off doing god knows what around the school,”
“Aw Ar, why you gotta phrase it like that?” Eren protested, as blushed crept onto Mikasa’s face.
Jean wiggled his eyebrows as he poured the coffee carefully into his cup. “Oh-ho! Please, grace us with all the juicy details-“
Eren gave Armin a death stare, while Mikasa begun to protest. “It’s not like that....”
“Oh, I believe you, hun’,” Jean said with a wink, taking his usual space, leaning in his usual spot against the counter. “Anyway, so these documents. What’s in them, anything exciting?”
“Well, I only briefly looked over them before leaving, I’m pretty sure it did say something about where it happened. They’re on the table if you want to pass them over, Jean,” Armin asked.
He mumbled a ‘sure’ and pushed off the counter, picking them up without looking at them, slinging them over to Armin, making him almost spill his drink. He shot a look at Jean before opening them up, placing his drink on the wobbly coffee table. He hummed, glossing over the details, his eyes moving back and forth at an almost scary pace.
“Aren’t you worried that they’ll know these are missing? I mean you did ask to get them before doing something illegal to get them, right?” Jean queried.
“Eh, they won’t bother checking,” Armin stated boldly, still flicking through the words at fast pace. “Ah, here’s something,”
Everyone leaned in a little, to hear what had to be said.
“The coach left around 12pm, with precisely a one or two hour journey ahead. About an hour into the journey, the class stopped for gas. After getting back on the coach, they journeyed for another half an hour before the crash took place. The crash took place along the M-185, Michigan- that’s it! That’s where we need to go!”
“Still a little vague, don’t you think Ar?” Eren said, placing his finished drink on the table.
Armin sighed. “Yeah I guess so. Let’s see...” He continued reading fast pace, flicking through the pages until he got to the last page. “Hmm, says here that they erected a plaque, in memory of those who lost their lives.”
Mikasa shifted uncomfortably in her seat. All this talk about what happened was making her a little giddy, and not in the good way. Although she felt like she had made progress, as before it couldn’t even be mentioned without her wanting to curl up into a ball and cry, sometimes, it did still get a bit surreal. Her dreamy flashback she had also didn’t make her current situation much better for her. She often felt as people judged her still for her actions; which, in all fairness, they probably did. But they were coming to a sort of acceptance for it. That’s what it felt like, at least.
“You’ll know where to stop then, right?” Jean questioned.
“Roughly. I guess we’ll just have to look out for it,” Armin replied, not looking up from the papers that covered his lap.
Eren found himself looking at Mikasa again. She was kind of dazed out, staring at nothing in particular. She almost looked like a zombie. Even as he thought this, the gorgeous ora that always seemed to surround her, hadn’t left.
“Hey, Mikasa, are you okay?”
She shook her head slightly, looking up and blinking a lot. “Huh? Oh, yeah, I’m okay,” Eren took her word for it, even though he knew she was lying. Yet, it didn’t bother him for some reason.
“Right,” Jean slammed his cup down on the counter, before throwing his keys in the air and catching them again. Mikasa wondered if he always did that before leaving to go somewhere. “I’m off to work. Annie, need a lift?”
Annie nodded, standing up, leaving her unfinished cup with Armin, as she went to get her things from his room.
“You’re going to work, dressed like that?” Eren scoffed. Jean looked down at himself. He was wearing jeans and a red and white striped t-shirt. He himself thought he was sporting something cool to wear.
“What? Casual Friday, duh”
Eren rolled his eyes, leaning back into the couch. “Get me a job at your work, please,” He said, mumbling. His quest for job hunting had failed him so far.
“Not a chance. My boss would take one look at you and tell you to piss off. Plus, I refuse to work with you, or in fact be around you longer than I have to!”
“You always come over here, we never ask you to!” Eren retorted.
Annie came out of Armin’s bedroom, ready to leave. As they said their goodbyes, Mikasa’s eyes widened at the sudden thought she just had.
“Oh, crap! What day is today?”
“Friday,” Armin replied nonchalantly.
She jumped up from her seat spooking the boys, and pulled herself out of Eren’s t-shirt, letting it silently drop to the floor. Seeing her leather jacket on the coat rack near the door, she flew to grab it.
“I’ve gotta open up the library today! Ah shit,” She hurriedly put her leather jacket on, as well as her shoes.
“Do you want me to drop you there?” Armin said, collecting the papers and putting them on the coffee table in front, ready to stand.
“No, I’ve troubled you enough. Fuck it, I’ll run it. It’s not too far, right?”
The boys both gave her worried looks at her sudden impulse of exercise.
“And you’re going to work dressed like that?” Eren asked, again.
She looked down at herself. Perhaps black leggings, black boots and a plaid shirt weren’t the best thing for work. She was basically the manager of the library, so she wouldn’t exactly get told off for it. Maybe a few complaints from older customers, but they never bothered her much. Mikasa looked back up at him and smiled.
“Casual Friday, right?” She said with a small smile.
Gaining only smiles in return, Mikasa took it as her cue to leave. As she opened the door, Eren’s voice loudly echoed through the apartment.
“Wait!”
She flew her head around, hoping whatever he had to say would be quick. Black hair molded around her finally settled face, wide eyes open at Eren. Armin also looked inquisitively at Eren.
“We should, uh...” He paused, taking a breath, closing his eyes. “We should leave tonight.”
“What? No no no, we have too much planning to do. First there’s over night stay, then things we need for the journey, and in case something happens to one of us...“
Armin’s voice droned on in the background, each time his voice came back up denting Eren’s proposition. Leaving tonight did sound reckless. But it also sounded terribly fun. Armin was a quick thinker; he could plan it all in a day, right? Or they could make it up as they go along, she thought. While their goal remained clear, the idea of making memories, and going on a road trip with her two best friends wasn’t an opportunity she could pass up. The idea was too attractive for her to ignore. Pictures, diary entries, memories, could all be made and left to be found once again one day.
“Okay,” She said boldly, shutting the door, making her word more effective.
“You guys are really stupid, you know,” Jean said, shutting the door of the green shitty car Armin owned. Armin rolled down his window passenger side, sighing.
“I completely agree.”
“Hey, it’s going to be fun!” Eren called from the trunk of the vehicle. He and Mikasa were placing suitcases in the back, only two. They didn’t need much for this trip. It was going to be short and sweet; hopefully not lasting longer than the weekend. Armin had planned route during his lunch at work, and because of this, Eren offered to drive.
Eren held the back door open for Mikasa, and she climbed in, making herself comfortable as the door slammed. She had decided to place herself in the middle seat, as she figured this way it would be easier for her to talk to the boys. Eren climbed in himself afterward, hands placed on the steering wheel.
Jean said his goodbyes to Armin, politely waving to Mikasa along with a wink, to which Mikasa pulled a face. Jean made his way over to Eren’s window to say goodbye, as Annie made her way up to Armin’s window to do the same. Even though they were going for literally two days, it felt like it was going to be forever. Perhaps Jean and Annie were worried about what would happen if their goal wasn’t achieved. They only wanted the best for their friends, and Mikasa could see this in the everyday gatherings they had, and she liked it.
Armin and Annie shared a goodbye kiss, which was met with rowdy behavior from both Jean and Eren. Mikasa had also picked up on the fact that Eren and Jean shared a very brotherly like relationship, in the fact that they fought a lot on the surface, but underneath it was clear they cared very deeply for each other. Despite this factor, it was also known to her that Jean was a bad influence n Eren, and that most of Eren’s childish antics were usually down to Jean. Mikasa was somewhat glad that he wasn’t coming along for the trip.
The widow’s wound up, and Eren started the car engine. He pulled out of the small parking lot their block of apartments had, and as they drove away, Mikasa couldn’t help but look back. She seemed to do that a lot, and that wasn’t just for car journeys.
The first twenty minutes were in complete silence. For some reason, this one didn’t fit as well as the other silences had. Armin was reading, and Eren was focused on driving. Or not, Mikasa couldn’t really tell. She had her earphones in, and was listening to Day Wave, perfect songs for long car journeys. The lights on the highway flashed into darkness, and sleep pulled her in. She kept nodding off at first, her head bobbing up and down, showing her slipping in and out of dream land.
Eren had noticed this, and kept looking in the rear view mirror to check on her. He found it odd that she would already be sleeping, as it was only half seven, yet he guessed due to stress about this whole trip, was a main factor to take into consideration. Eren smiled to himself, because she looked pretty cute with her head bobbing up and down like that. She’d try and wake herself, but always end up failing. He looked at her a frequent amount of times for Armin to pick up on it.
“You like her, don’t you.” He said in a matter of fact tone, not glancing up from his book once. Eren immediately began to protest.
“What?! No! Also, I’d just like to point out that she is right there, Ar.”
“She looks like she’s dreaming right now, I wouldn’t worry about it, “He flicked a page. “Why would it matter if she was awake, you said yourself don’t like her, so there’s nothing to hide, right?”
Eren cursed Armin for being smart. He’d caught him out. Truth be told, Eren really didn’t know if he liked Mikasa. She was cute, yeah, and had a fun personality when she wanted, but he didn’t know if he liked her like that. He didn’t really want to focus too much into that quite yet. He had more obstacles to tackle first. Or maybe he was just denying himself of finding out the truth.
Eren looked back once more. Mikasa’s neck was at an awful angle, and she’d be in pain when she woke up. He voiced this to Armin.
“Next stop I see, I’m sitting in the back with her. Her neck is in a dangerous position right now; you don’t mind driving for a while, right?”
Armin sighed. “Yeah, okay. I’ll drive us to our first rest stop for the night.”
Eren nodded in approval. He pulled the shitty green car over in the emergency stop lane, getting out quickly to change seats. As he climbed in the back, he carefully moved Mikasa’s sleeping body to the side, so he had room to get in. Once Eren was belted up, He took Mikasa’s body and let her head nestle in his lap. She sub consciously tucked her legs up on the seat, and settled in his lap, returning to her dream, barely having any understanding of what just happened. Armin caught Eren smiling down at her, as he climbed in and belted up himself.
“And you say you don’t like her,” He said, adjusting the rear view mirror, as he was smaller than Eren.
“It’s not like that,” Eren mumbled, crossing his arms, being careful not to jog Mikasa. The car set in motion, as did Armin’s persistent nature.
“Then what is it like? Is it like before?”
Before. Eren had crushed on Mikasa before, in High School. Only Armin knew about it, and Eren never acted on his feelings. Partly because of their friendship, but it was mostly due to what happened that lessened his affections for her. It saddened him that it happened, because Mikasa was truly his everything at one point in his life. Now that she was here with him again, and she was actually trying for redemption, made him feel like she was a lot stronger than she used to be, which may have been a factor in the possible reinstatement of his feelings for her.
“No. I honestly don’t know yet, Ar. You know I’d tell you if I...If I loved her.”
Armin smirked a little; making a quick glance at Mikasa’s sleeping body. “A crush and being in love are two completely different things, Eren.”
“You would know,” Eren sighed, looking out the window at the passing trees that seemed to only be flashes of a dark green. He was referring to Annie.
“Well, I’ll be here when you figure it out. You know I will,”
Eren smiled in response, yet he wasn’t quite sure if Armin saw. “You’ll never guess what. She told me in the gym the other day, when we fucked off from the office that she used to like me. She liked me back, and I had no idea.” He said shaking his head, still looking at the flashes.
“I knew. I always knew. You’re just a dummy Eren, as blind as a bat. It was painfully obvious.” Armin said, giving a slight chuckle, glancing back, out of the window, ready to switch lanes.
“Figures you wouldn’t tell me. You respect people’s privacy way too much for that,”
“Yeah. Even if it is only you, I couldn’t. It goes against pretty much everything I stand for. As cheesy as it sounds, love just kind of figures it out. You don’t need to push it. Maybe me meeting Mikasa was fate. That’s what she keeps saying, anyway.”
Eren scoffed, looking forward at the road ahead. “She believes in that crap?”
“Eh, probably not,” Armin stated, shrugging his left shoulder. “I think it’s the fact that somehow, we came back into her life. She’s thankful for another opportunity like that, and she’s willing to call it whatever to give herself some kind of reasoning to why she’s been allowed this. She’s come far in a short amount of time, and I’m proud of her for that.”
“Me too,” Eren gazed down at Mikasa’s body slowly moving up and down. Fresh moonlight came in through the window, gracing and giving her face justice. Her mouth was parted a little; yet she didn’t dribble in her sleep. Lashes were placed upon soft, pale skin. She looked so fragile; like a porcelain doll; that could be broken any second. Seeing her be beautiful even in moonlight gave Eren the answer he needed.
He may not know his true feelings for her, but he would support her through this. It was only thing he could give her right now.
“Me too.”