The Gayest Shit Ever
james.madisin: help
hamil.lion: no
james.madisin: really tho
loafayette: what is wrong mon ami
james.madisin: tjeffs and i are on a date
intothenarrative: OMF
james.madisin: well we’re not yet hes currently driving me to the mystery place
james.madisin: and hes blasting country music
hamil.lion: EW WTF
corsetz28: im not even there and im disgusted
hamil.lion: I DIDNT THINK IT WAS POSSIBLE TO HATE JEFFERSON ANY MORE
loafayette: ooh blake shelton?
james.madisin: no its thomas fuckig rhett
hamil.lion: LAF YOU LISTEN TO COUNTRY WHO ARE U
hamil.lion: IM DIVORICNG
loafayette: you already divorced me
hamil.lion: IM DOUBLE DIVORCING
jefferoni.macaroni: okay but country music is quality music
corsetz28: arent u driving right now
jefferoni.macaroni: were at a stop light right now calm down
james.madisin: eyes on the road u punk shit
jefferoni.macaroni: sorry my eyes were on u ((;
james.madisin: this would be cute if u werent enDANGERING MY LIFE
jefferoni.macaroni: ride or die
james.madisin: tbh let me out rn u r 100% not worth dying for
james.madisin: he promised to stop if id still go on this date with him (‘:
james.madisin: ok he told me we should turn our phones off so we can focus on each other better <3
hamil.lion: i liked it better when he was suffering and not giving us cavities
intothenarrative: ur just bitter bc ur boyfriend doesnt think ur sweet
hamil.lion: which one
loafayette: none of us do mon trognon
turt13.10v3r: i mean i definitely dont
corsetz28: ur about as sweet as curry ngl
hamil.lion: woW ok i guess i know how you all feel now
hamil.lion: dont even worry abt date night complications w odd numbers bc im divorcing all of u )):
@hamil.lion has left the chat
comma.sexting: oh shit
comma.sexting: should we do something?
turt13.10v3r: nah he does this weekly
intothenarrative: u kno hes not serious bc he said he was divorcing us instead of breaking up
turt13.10v3r: yeah watch this
@turt13.10v3r has added @hamil.lion to the chat
turt13.10v3r: im sorry my dearest
turt13.10v3r: i love you
turt13.10v3r: will u marry me again
hamil.lion: only if u buy me ice cream
turt13.10v3r: on my way w dq asap
intothenarrative: wait wtf i want ice cream
corsetz28: why does alex get ice cream and we dont wow r00d
turt13.10v3r: herc and liza if u want dq come to hams apartment we can have group date night early
corsetz28: sweet
intothenarrative: aw john <3
loafayette: ur having group date night AND ice cream w/o me
loafayette: ))’:
corsetz28: no we could never have group date night w/o our gay european <3
intothenarrative: no laf we can skype you in!
hamil.lion: but u cant eat our ice cream
hamil.lion: bc u live in france and stuff
loafayette: thats ok as long as i get to spend time with my datemates ((‘:
loafayette: <3
corsetz28: <3
intothenarrative: <3
hamil.lion: <3
turt13.10v3r: <3
comma.sexting: brb gotta just eat all my ice cream
comma.sexting: alone
intothenarrative: dont u have a gf tho
comma.sexting: oh right
@comma.sexting has added @its.pronounced.mariah to the chat
comma.sexting: maria be disgustingly cute with me so i feel less alone
its.pronounced.mariah: do you wanna cuddle and watch documentaries about feminism with me
comma.sexting: YES
comma.sexting: IM SO GLAD YOURE THE ONE IM DATING TBH
its.pronounced.mariah: <3
comma.sexting: <3
hamil.lion: wait so does that mean burr is the only one in this chat dateless tonight
intothenarrative: burr isnt in this chat
@hamil.lion has added @a.burr to the chat
hamil.lion: wait so does that mean burr is the only one in this chat dateless tonight
a.burr: what do i have to do to keep you from adding me to this chat
a.burr: and did you seriously add me in just to mock my lack of romantic activity
hamil.lion: wait no now i feel bad
hamil.lion: baes can i invite burr to the group date
turt13.10v3r: gdi alex why do you always do this
turt13.10v3r: yes u can invite him but idk what ice cream he likes so he has to deal with what we already have
hamil.lion: other baes?
corsetz28: sure
loafayette: why not
intothenarrative: yeah
a.burr: literally who said i wanted to join any of you in anything at all that has to do with romanticism
a.burr: let alone all of you
a.burr: if thats you asking the answer is no
hamil.lion: what if i said please though
a.burr: then the answer would be no thank you
turt13.10v3r: it would be fun though
hamil.lion: its like a party but more exclusive and instead of alcohol theres ice cream
corsetz28: and instead of drunk sad people having sex theres sober happy people cuddling
a.burr: if i go on a date with you will you stop adding me into the chat
hamil.lion: only if you want us to stop
a.burr: on my way to hamilton’s rn
hamil.lion: :D
@a.burr has left the chat