Waking Up In Vegas

Alex was a few notches past livid, “who the fuck hell did this woman think she was, showing up in front of our doorstep after like two years of no communication.”  Alex wanted nothing more than to push Tobin aside and give the woman a piece of her mind.

 This wasn’t her fight though, it was Tobin’s and Alex didn’t want to interfere, but she also didn’t want this woman thinking that she could show up after all this time and things would be okay.  Alex furrowed her brows, and pushed Tobin aside, saying what she knew for a fact Tobin would be afraid to.

“This …” Alex motioned to her surrounding area, “is not okay.” Alex declared, her voice steadily rising.  “You can’t just show up here, after two fucking years, two fucking years, and think that Tobin will just talk to you.”

Tobin stood beside Alex dumbfounded, she was oddly touched, that Alex would stand up for her like this, but she didn’t really need Alex’s help, she was a big girl, who could fight her own battles.

“Al” Tobin said softly placing a hand on her shoulder, “I got this.” She said equally as gently.  Alex paused in her rant to look at Tobin, who was wearing a face of bravery.  Alex understood the look that Tobin was giving her, “I need to do this on my own.” Were the words that Tobin’s eyes seemed to convey and Alex reluctantly accepted that.  Alex’s expression softened a bit, and her defensive stance shifted into one a bit more that was a bit more civil.

“You sure, I can really tell her off if you need me to Toby.” Alex whispered, loud enough so that the woman facing them both could hear though.  Alex smirked when out of the corner of her eyes she could see the woman cringe at the nickname.  “Gotcha bitch”

“I can handle it.” Tobin reassured her, and Alex had full confidence that Tobin could.  Even if she couldn’t, this needed to be done.  As much as Alex hated the thought of leaving Tobin alone with her ex, Tobin needed this conversation so that she could finally move past her ever present fear of starting a new romantic relationship.

“Okay.” She said, taking Tobin into another hug, “Call me if you need me, I’m going to the store, I’m giving you two hours.” Alex ended with a reassuring peck on Tobin’s cheek, and it gave Tobin the confidence and security she needed to finally face her ex, alone.

“You have 1 hour.” Alex said sternly to the woman before retreating to her car and driving off.

**

“Are you atleast going to let me inside?” She tried to joke

Tobin’s face didn’t budge, “Why are you here?”

“I’ve had a lot of time to think and – “

“Oh yes, I know, two fucking years in fact. You know what? Come inside, I might throw up if I’m standing while listening to what you have to say.” Tobin explained, walking into the house which they had once shared.  Everything was the same, well, almost, there were two different pairs of boots waiting by the door now, two different coats hanging from the rack and it gave Tobin’s ex the immediate impression that someone else was now living here.

“Your girlfriend seems really … protective of you.” She stated before sitting in the single recliner of Tobin’s living room.  Tobin took the couch across from her, wanting to be as far away from the woman as possible.

Tobin didn’t correct her, feeling it would be better if she had just left it at that, “Yeah, I love that about her.” Tobin said instead, which wasn’t a lie.

“So … how long have you two been together?” She tried, easing them into small talk.

“Can we cut the crap Chris?” Tobin stared blankly, “Why are you here?”

“I can’t stop thinking about you.  I saw you today at the restaurant, and all of our memories just flooded into my mind, I had been contemplating calling you for a while, but seeing you today, it helped me make my choice” She said rather desperately, looking up at Tobin to see that she wasn’t looking back at her, but out of the window instead.  Tobin was trying her hardest not to face her ex, she had looked just as beautiful as the day they first met, and Tobin feared she might get sucked back into her trap if she looked for too long.

Two years had been good to Tobin, she looked a lot older, although Christen wasn’t sure if it was because of time, or stress.  Her features were still soft, but strong in that odd way that Christen once fell in love with.  Tobin’s eyes weren’t as friendly as they were when they got together though, with good reason too.

Tobin gave a lifeless chuckle in reply, part of her was happy to hear this, but still, she wasn’t ready to forgive her so easily. 

“You could have called, you could have texted, shit, you could’ve sent me a fucking letter. But you decide, to come to MY home, unannounced 2 years after you left me.”

“I was going through a bit of a rough time – “

“That’s what you had me for, so we could share in your problems, so I could help you, that’s sort of what a relationship is.” Tobin finished sarcastically.

Christen was partially impressed, Tobin had gotten a lot tougher since she had last seen her, the old Tobin would have probably already forgiven her by now.

“My mom was dying. She passed last year”

She noted the brief crack in Tobin’s stoic countenance.

“I’m sorry to hear.  You could’ve told me.”

“I didn’t want you to worry.  You know she never approved of you and I, you and her were never on the best of terms.”

“If you paid attention to detail, you might have noticed that I’m not one to care for people’s opinions of me.” Tobin said, taking a loud sigh.

“Why did you say you were here again? Alex is gonna be back soon and we have plans.” Tobin lied, the truth was, behind her unbothered expression, she wanted to break down in tears.  This wasn’t exactly how she pictured their reunion to go.

“I missed you, I still miss you.  I’m sorry that I left, I felt like I owed something to my mom you know? At least to give her an inlaw she could be happy and proud of you before she died.” Christen said, wiping away a stray tear.

“Chris” Tobin started, feeling sympathetic towards the woman sitting across from her.  Tobin’s forgiving nature subconsciously picked up her feet and lead her across the room to engulf the woman in a hug.

“It’s okay.” Tobin reassured her, and just like that, she found herself trapped in the arms of the one person she was sure didn’t deserve her forgiveness.

Tobin caught herself before she could get totally lost in the scent that used to intoxicate her to no end, she could definitely feel herself slipping.

“This doesn’t excuse what you did though.” Tobin said pulling away, returning to her place on the couch.

“I suffered for two years because of you Christen, I still am.” Tobin said, recounting the past few months of her life.  It was scary how one person could affect your life so greatly, if Tobin could do it all again, she would certainly do things much differently, or would she? Everything with Christen had led her to Alex … Alex was … definitely something else, she was everything Christen was not, and Tobin would definitely see them together one day, if thoughts of Christen didn’t haunt her at night.

“I don’t expect you to forgive me right away, what I did, was, it was terrible, but I had to at least try to make my mom happy, but I couldn’t, everything led back to you.”

Tobin was having a rough time staying emotionally neutral, partially because she had felt the same way as Christen, everything led back to her, she could not be happy with anyone because everything had led back to her.

“I feel, no I felt the same way, but I’m learning to deal with it, Alex being here is helping a lot.  Our relationship wasn’t good for us – “

“Maybe we can make it work, please Tobin?” She pleaded giving Tobin the biggest sad eyes she had ever seen.  “At least let me take you to lunch? We can at least try to be friends, you meant – you mean a lot to me”

Tobin’s biggest weakness was always Christen, and Christen knew it too, so it was no surprise when Tobin reluctantly agreed. “Great, here’s my number, text me when you’re free.”