Chapter 1
The turquoise light of the lava lamp fills the tiny otherwise dark room, casting shadows on the wall behind the furniture. If she looks long enough, she can almost imagine her sitting on the chair eating a sandwich from the deli two blocks away that she loved so much and spewing snarky comments halfheartedly. Root does not imagine, however. Instead, she lies on her side in the small bed and stares at the pink waxy blobs drifting up and down inside of the lamp. Weightless and carefree. If Shaw could see this, she'd snort sarcastically and say something mildly insulting. Root would smile and say something flirty back, earning an eye roll from the shorter woman before she'd shuffle away.
"If it explodes and sets the whole place on fire, I'm saving Bear first." Shaw would most likely say.
A warm wet tear slides down the side of Root's face and into her hairline. She closes her eyes to keep the other forming tears at bay, but it pushes them out instead. Her voice. She's almost forgotten what Shaw's monotone voice sounds like. She's almost forgotten what her hard and calloused hands feels like. What her mischievous and sardonic smile looks like. She can hardly remember the dark irises that burned her in the most satisfying and intoxicating way she has ever felt. Sameen was a ghost in her memory now, but Root refused to let her fade like Harold and John have allowed.
Ten months. It had been ten months since they shared that final and most meaningful kiss; right before Shaw sacrificed herself and to save Root and the others. Root could never forget Shaw, no. She couldn't forget what she looked like even if she wanted to. The image of her pained face when the first bullet hit her will forever be etched into Root's brain. The sight of her dropping to the floor in a puddle of her own blood is branded into the back of her eyes; always present. The echo of the final gunshot is startles Root awake most nights. Root doesn't sleep much anymore; she can't remember the last time she had a full peaceful night's sleep.
She opens her eyes again and slowly sits up in her bed. She throws her legs over the edge of the bed and slips her bare feet into her bunny slippers before standing up and leaving her room. The train cart is dark, but tinted with an array of warm blue light. She steps in and sits in the chair in front of the black monitors.
She sits quietly, staring at the screens for quite a while, before she reaches toward the one right in front of her and presses the power on button; she does the same action with the monitor above her. The screens light up and Root shuts her eyes from them, adjusting to the sudden brightness. When she opens her eyes, she just stares at the screen in front of her again. Her heart is starting to pound already. Not with excitement or hope, but with dread and anticipation. Hope? She lost that the first time She failed to locate Shaw when She was up and running again. She lost hope over and over again; every time she looked at the monitor just to see the same thing it said the first time.
She looks up to the top monitor and watches the dark and almost empty street the camera is pointing at. The magazine stand is closed, the magazines gone and the steel shutter covers the counter. A homeless man sits on a blanket farther down the sidewalk. A few cars drive down the street. Root watches the camera's surveillance with a blank stare until her eyes go dry and sting. She looks down at the keyboard in front her and brings her fingertips to the keys, typing out the same thing she does almost every night.
She leans against the desk and watches Her work, her vision already blurring from the layer of salty water covering her eyes.
Searching for asset:
SHAW, SAMEEN
Her breath is shaky as she sees the camera locations get highlighted one by one. Finch had told her that She would alert them if there was any sign of Sameen's whereabouts, but that just wasn't enough for Root. She would lie in bed every once in a while and ask Her if She had found even a single breadcrumb for Shaw, but She never gives her a real answer.
Sierra
Tango
Oscar
Papa
That's all She ever tells her, unless Root physically looks Shaw up on the monitors. Even The Machine seemed to feel pity for Root. The computer beeps and Root focuses on the monitor again.
0 HITS. SEARCH UNSUCCESSFUL
Root closes her eyes in defeat once again. She allows the stream of tears to escape this time as she rests her head in her open palms on the desk. A quiet sob pushes up from her lungs and out of her mouth as news -- or lack thereof -- hits her. The monitors go into sleep mode and black out, but she stays in her place in front of them. She cries in the train cart well past two hours until her nose is so stuffed she can't breathe through it and her eyes are so puffy they're only half open. She cries silently until her head hurts and her body is absolutely exhausted. She cries until her eyes no longer produce tears and the tracks on her cheeks dry and tighten the skin underneath.
She stands with shaky legs and arms and gives the black monitors one last glance before turning around and dragging her feet out of cart. She feels more than sees Bear at her side as he nudges her hand with his nose. She makes it back to her room and Bear follows. When she climbs back into bed, Bear jumps up and curls up beside her, resting his head in her lap and starts whining.
"I know," She whispers to him, a lump in her throat making her sound like she's underwater. "I miss her too, buddy. So much."
Sierra
Tango
Oscar
Papa
She can't stop. No matter how many times She has told her to stop looking for Sameen, she cannot. Not after she had proof that the sociopath was still alive. She shouldn't have listened the first time She told her to stop, but she trusted Her. She still did, but Root couldn't follow that instruction anymore. Though she wasn't actively going around the state torturing and killing anyone who might know a thing about Shaw's location, she still was looking for her. When she wasn't working numbers or doing things for The Machine, she was digging into any possible way to find Sameen. Samaritan was far too smart to leave anything, however. No smudge, no breadcrumb, no crack in the glass, nothing.
Root feels tears slipping down her cheeks again and she sighs, looking back at the lava lamp and cuddling into Bear’s warm body.
Sierra
Tango
Oscar
Papa
No, she won't stop looking until she finds Shaw. She just hopes that when she does, it's not in a body bag.
When she wakes up the next day, it's to find Harold in the cage with the battle between The Machine and Mini Samaritan. John sits at the desk outside of the train cart, cleaning his guns. Root smiles sadly, remembering all the times she'd find Shaw cleaning her guns there instead.
"Good afternoon, Miss Groves." Harold says from in the cage. He's giving her a look of concern and she pushes the sad smile away to make room for her usual perky one.
"How is She doing in there?" She asks, pointing to the laptops in front of Finch with her chin.
"There is breakfast on the bench if you're hungry." He avoids the question and points past her. She may not be able to see the fight going on in the cage, but Root knows it's not going too good for Her. She nods and heads for the bench full of fast food breakfast. She opts for a deep red apple instead.
"I take it we don't have a number today?" She asks John as she leans against his chair and takes a bite from her apple.
"The Machine not keeping you updated?" Reese asks with a mix of amusement and curiosity. He looks up at her for an answer.
She taps her ear swiftly as she finishes chewing. "I need to recharge." She opens a desk drawer and pulls out batteries.
"Detective Fusco is looking a bit more into our new number, Miss Groves." Finch says, locking the gate behind him when he leaves the cage. "He is following her around while Mr. Reese finishes whatever he is doing."
"Clean mine while you're at it?" Root asks with a quick smile to John. She pulls her two pistols out from another drawer and sets them on the desk in front of him. "I'm coming with you."
"That won't be necessary, Miss Groves." Finch says, trundling over to the two of them. "I guarantee this woman is not dangerous enough to need two people with guns following her around."
Root wraps an arm around Finch playfully. "I'm bored, Harry. I want to do something fun! Plus, I'm sure She will have something for me to do once I put new batteries in."
"We still don't know whether she's the victim or perpetrator, Finch." John says, not looking away from cleaning one of Root's pistols. "Just because she's tiny doesn't mean she's not capable killing or doing something illegal. Shaw is the prime examp--" He stops short of his sentence and freezes in his cleaning. Slowly, he turns to Finch and Root, searching their faces.
Root forces a playful smile onto her lips and leans down to John's ear. "At least you said is and not was." She says lightly before pushing herself up and taking another bite of the apple in her hand.
There's a few beats of silence before Finch changes the subject and Root tunes the two of them out as she makes her way to Bear, who is happily gnawing on a large bone. She replaces the batteries in her cochlear implant and sits on the floor to pet Bear while the two men start bickering about something to do with their newest number. Just before Reese finishes cleaning her second pistol, She starts speaking to Root and Root stands from her spot.
"Sorry John," She says. "Change of plans. I've got different orders now. Thanks for the clean up, big guy." She takes her pistols and stuffs them into the back of her pants before heading for the exit.
"What is it you're going to do, Miss Groves?" Finch asks.
She spins around to look at them and shrugs. "No idea." She practically sings before spinning back around and leaving.
"I sure hope she stays undetected." Finch mumbles. "She's not doing so good during the night still and I'm afraid her lack of sleep might get the better of her soon."
"Would you like me to keep an eye on her?" John asks, standing from his seat and turning to Finch.
"That's quite alright, Mr. Reese. The priority for the two of us is Emily Smith." John nods his understanding.
"She can take care of herself, Finch." He says.
"Yes," Finch says sadly, slowly nodding his head. "But Miss Groves might not have her head completely on anything until we find Miss Shaw. She spends most of her nights staring at the monitors."
John bows his head dejectedly. "Still no sign? Nothing?"
"Not even a whisper of a whisper. I'm afraid it may be more than just her being well hidden now."
John shakes his head. "I don't believe that. Shaw is a fighter."
"It has been ten months, Mr. Reese. There's only so much time someone can fight until it's too much, even for Miss Shaw. I simply cannot imagine what Samaritan might be doing to her as we speak if she is still alive."
They're quiet for a while, both standing beside each other. "I have my doubts as well, but I agree with something Root said to me before."
"And what is that?"
John looks to Finch with a small smile. "Nothing kills that cat." He slips his gun into its holster and leaves the room.
Root sighs sadly and continues walking down the sidewalk. Of course she bugged the underground hideout. She had to know whenever The Machine first announced it has found Shaw. Hearing the conversation between Finch and Reese, however, was not something she expected. She knew Finch had his doubts, but he didn't seem to have any hope that Shaw was still alive. Yet again.
Root knew she was still alive, she was sure of it. She was grateful for John's words. He too believed her to be alive, for the most part. The Machine is speaking to her again, and Root has to focus on the matter at hand for the time being. After this new mission she's working on, it was time to start digging some more.
Sierra
Tango
Oscar
Papa
"Shaw is not going to be happy we took this long to rescue her." She sighs sadly, fighting back the horrid feeling in her gut and smiling lightly.