Surprises
Herc Nochilligan sent a message to group chat Hamilbros and Hoes
Herc Nochilligan: gUYS IT'S IMPORTANT
Herc Nochilligan: LAF IS COMING HOME TOMORROW AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO?!?!?!?
SmolHamMan: Well...
irlANGEL: Alex no
irlANGEL: You suck at giving romantic advice
SmolHamMan: Angelica why are you always spreading your lies?
J. Laur: Hon she's right
SmolHamMan: Why are you always against me John
J. Laur: ;)
Peggles: Ew
AyAyRon: Ditto
SmolHamMan: Shut up
J. Laur: Back to the point
J. Laur: Remember the way you flirted with me when we first met?
AyAyRon: Oh my god that was hilarious
Laflyette: I remember that
Laflyette: One of Alexander's greatest moments
Herc. Nochilligan: I have that on camera it was so good
T. Jeffersinn: What stupid thing did Hamilton do?
JemMads: ^
Washingdone: I'm interested too
Peggles: Guys spill the details what happened
Elizard: I'm interested
irlANGEL: I'm sure it isn't that bad let's give Alex some credit
Laflyette: Where did John even go?
J. Laur: I'm back
J. Laur: Alex had taken my phone but I got it back
SmolHamMan: He locked me out of the apartment
Peggles: Smooth
J. Laur: Okay who's ready for story time????
SmolHamMan: I'm not
J. Laur: Okay so the first time I met Alex was at a bar
J. Laur: This was like a week into college and Burr was showing Alex around town
J. Laur: Herc, Laf and were fooling around as always because what else do we do at bars
J. Laur: So eventually Laf and Herc leave me alone to screw each other senseless (Which started their relationship so go me being a good friend and not complaining about it)
J. Laur: Now Burr had brought Alex to introduce himself when they first entered the bar, which was about an hour before Laf and Herc left so I already knew his name
J. Laur: So he comes over and slides into the seat next to mine, clearly more than a little drunk
J. Laur: And I shit you not, this is what he said word for word
J. Laur: 'Bartender! Let me get an amaretto sour for this ghetto flower! How are you so pretty? You complete me. You had me at hello, you know you need me. Truly, madly, deeply, let's get freaky. Oh I get it you’re the strong and silent type. Well, I’m the Caribbean island type, and I can drive you wild all night!
But I digress! Say something so I don’t stress!'
J. Laur: And I didn't know what to say AT ALL and when I get drunk my mind sometimes switches to Spanish since I was forced to learn it which makes sense since I am like half Puerto Rican but that's not the point
J. Laur: And I responded with 'no hablo ingles'
J. Laur: He was so drunk that he forgot that I did speak English, screamed 'YES' and then proceeded to flirt with me in Spanish
irlANGEL: I stand corrected
irlANGEL: This is the worst thing I've ever heard you do
Peggles: SQUEALIGN
Herc Nochilligan: sent a video
Elizard: Oh my g od
Elizard: Alexander you are never allowed to drink AGAIN
T. Jeffersinn: I can't believe this somebody save me I cant breathe
JemMads: #prayforalex
Washingdone: How are you the top of my class?
Washingdone: Why are you the top of my ACCELERATED class?
Washingdone: Why am I still here?
JemMads: I ask myself that every time I wake up next to Thomas
T. Jeffersinn: Honestly,,,,,ouch
J. Laur: Well that was one hell of a drag
SmolHamMan: I can feel Thomas's pain through the screen and it made me cringe
Herc Nochilligan: Can we get back on track please? Laf is sleeping right now in France and I want to plan before they wake up.
J. Laur: Okay first off, don't listen to Alex. He's useless in situations like this.
J. Laur: Newsflash, Alex threw himself into the door. My point still stands.
J. Laur: I think you should pamper them first
J. Laur: Then take them out to dinner at that cute little diner they like
Herc Nochilligan: Why is John the only useful one here?
Elizard: I was going to argue with that but it's true
irlANGEL: ^^^
Peggles: ^^^
T. Jeffersinn: How are you going out with Hamilton?
SmolHamMan: Why do you insist on shoving your crusty ass into my business every goddamn day?
JemMads: Play nice Thomas
JemMads: Now is not the time for a roast fest
Peggles: Wait is that an actual thing
Peggles: Please say yes
AyAyRon: Of course it is
T. Jeffersinn: Everyday during our lunch breaks we meet outside Washington's office and roast each other
T. Jeffersinn: Worst roaster has to treat the others to lunch
Washingdone: Is that what all that yelling is?
SmolHamMan: Sorry GWash I'll keep them quiet next timr
Washingdone: Alexander the one usually yelling is you
T. Jeffersinn: Who's loud now Hamilton?
JemMads: Still you
T. Jeffersinn left the chat
J. Laur: IM,,,,,,YODELING
J. Laur: And Alex don't you dare say "you will be tonight"
SmolHamMan: Well I'm not gonna do it anymore
SmolHamMan: Also can I come back in now?
SmolHamMan: The old lady across from us is staring at me and it's freaking me out
AyAyRon: You guys are so problematic
irlANGEL: I couldn't put it any better myself
J. Laur: Go to the store and buy some frosted flakes and maybe we'll talk about it
J. Laur: I slid your wallet under the door
SmolHamMan: God you hate me
irlANGEL: John are you still giving free advice? Because I need some for a close friend of mine.
J. Laur: Of course Angel
irlANGEL: So my friend is dating this person, and they're really happy with said person, but they aren't sure if they're ready to tell their family or not
irlANGEL: What would they do?
J. Laur: Okay so here's what they'd do
J. Laur: Tell them to take their time with it and only to tell if they're sure that they're ready to reveal it
J. Laur: Sometimes it's better not to tell people until you know you really trust them
irlANGEL: Okay thanks
irlANGEL: Also what's a good anniversary present?
irlANGEL: My friend wants advice for that as well
J. Laur: Since you're being very cryptic, I'm gonna say something completely cliche
J. Laur: Something sweet, doesn;t matter if they take their lover out or make them something involving memories
J. Laur: And make sure they can afford it. Sometimes the cheapest things are the most meaningful.
irlANGEL: And with that I gotta go
irlANGEL: Later y'all
irlANGEL left the chat
Peggles: Now we can talk about her
Washingdone: Peggy that's not very mature of you
Elizard: No she's right for once
Elizard: Angie's been acting weird
Peggles: I think she likes somebody but I'm not fully sure
SmolHamMan: Oh pray tell I'm interested
JemMads: ^^^
J. Laur: ^^^
Washingdone: ^^^
Herc Nochilligan: ^^^
Elizard: Well she's smiling a lot at her phone and always leaving suddenly whenever we're together
Peggles: I was investigating and I heard her laughing and talking to someone on the phone
Peggles: She sounded really happy
Peggles: Our little girl is growing up guys
J. Laur: Peggy she's older than you
Peggles: Yes but she's smaller than me in other ways
Elizard: I don't think I wanna know
JemMads: Well while on this subject I have a source that may know something
JemMads: AKA Thomas was telling me about Angelica the other day
JemMads added T. Jeffersinn to the chat
JemMads: Thomas we need you now
JemMads: Remember what you told me about Angelica?
T. Jeffersinn: You mean when I told you I saw her out with some girl?
SmolHamMan: YOU SAW WHAT?!?!?
T. Jeffersinn: Yeah she was out at lunch like a week or two ago
SmolHamMan: Why did this never come up?
T. Jeffersinn: You never asked
AyAyRon: Now that you mention it, I've seen her with someone too
AyAyRon: Don't know who it is though
SmolHamMan: I'm gonna snoop later on
J. Laur: Alex no that's stupid
Elizard: He's right
Peggles: Listen to your boyfriend he has way more sense
SmolHamMan: Peggy why do you feel the need to hurt me everyday of my life
Peggles: Not everyday
Peggles: Only most days
SmolHamMan: Okay no but why shouldn't I do any research?
J. Laur: Because then she won't want to tell us who it is
J. Laur: I knew that advice was for her I mean the friend excuse is so cliche
J. Laur: So until she's ready we will be supportive
Herc Nochilligan: John should run a dating hotline
J. Laur: I've thought about it tbh and it might happen I'm not sure
J. Laur: Maybe I'll just make a blog
Washingdone: I won't lie, I've underestimated John so many times
Washingdone: And he never ceases to amaze me
SmolHamMan: Yeah he's pretty great
SmolHamMan: He'd be even greater if he came and opened the fucking door
J. Laur: Woops sorry I'm shaving my legs
J. Laur: Omw
Peggles: Okay but John has really nice legs
Peggles: Like I found myself staring at them one day and they're honestly so good
SmolHamMan: hothotleg.png
AyAyRon: Skin = clear
Washingdone: Bills = paid
Peggles: Grades = PERFECT
Elizard: Internet = strong
J. Laur: You guys are so nice to me
SmolHamMan: And I'm about to go be nice to him so later
Herc Nochilligan: Why are you guys always having sex this is bogus
JemMads: It honestly is
T. Jeffersinn: Even I'm not this bad and that's saying a lot
Washingdone: If only Alex spent as much time paying attention in class as he does with John
Peggles: Y O
Elizard: Professor nO
Herc Nochilligan: Bye I'm actually dead
JemMads: ^^^
T. Jeffersinn: ^^^
AyAyRon: Peggy we're teaching him well
Peggles: Is this what being a proud parent feels like?
AyAyRon: I think it is
AyAyRon: Okay now I have to go
AyAyRon: Theo and I are going to the movies
JemMads: Tell Theo Thomas and I said hi
Elizard: Same for me and Peggy
Washingdone: And Martha and I
SmolHamMan: Theo scares me tbh
J. Laur: But she's so sweet and has a great fashion sense
J. Laur: She makes me jealous
AyAyRon: I'll tell her all that
AyAyRon left the chat
Elizard: Well I think we agree that this conversation is going nowhere now so I'll part with some words of advice
Elizard: Alexander if you go after Angelica and badger her I swear on all that is holy that I will bring a powerful wrath upon you
Peggles: AKA we're gonna roast the SHIT out of you
SmolHamMan: You have nothing to roast me about so check and mate
Herc Nochilligan: Alex do not get me started okay
Herc Nochilligan: I have the receipts and I guarantee you that your weave will be snatched
JemMads: Thomas and I have them too
T. Jeffersinn: You'll be making this so easy Hamilton
J. Laur: Yeah babe don't do this
Washingdone: Listen to John. He's smart.
SmolHamMan: Wow okay you are all so RUDE
SmolHamMan: But I'll listen because I kind of like my weave where it is
Elizard: Good
SmolHamMan: But what if it comes up in convo?
J. Laur: As long as it isn't forced
SmolHamMan: I'll do my best
J. Laur: Good now come cuddle with me
Herc Nochilligan: Ew relationship
Herc Nochilligan: Okay but yeah gonna go set stuff up for the boo
Elizard: Have fun with that
Herc Nochilligan: I plan to