You've got to be Squiding Me Part 1
Shaw barrels in through the front door of her apartment, or hers and Root’s , whatever carrying a couple bags with sandwiches and pastries for lunch.
The apartment has a certain stench to it and Shaw wonders if Root’s actually bathed yet for today, or since like the past two days from where she was hunched over her laptop typing away for Her. It still creeps Shaw out to this day that the damn thing took not only Root’s voice but her personality, fucking nerds.
“Root!” Shaw shouts from the kitchen.
“I’ll be right down sweetie!” The said woman replies from upstairs.
No sooner is Root skipping down the steps and moves to hug Shaw from behind only for the smaller woman to hiss. Root pulls back and can see Shaw has a bruise on her jaw, popped lip and scrape on her brow.
“Sweetie what happened?” Root’s voice is lace with concern as she lifts Shaw’s shirt to see bruises along Sameen’s ribs.
She brushes her hand lightly over them “Are they broken?”
Shaw scoffs before shoving Root’s hand away “If they were broken I wouldn’t be able to walk Root”
“You barely look like you can” Root challenges her before pausing a teasing tone to her voice “Or is that from all the positions I had you in last night” moving to nip lightly at Shaw’s ear.
Shaw gulps slightly leveling Root with a glare trying to swallow down the rush of arousal that pools in her stomach at Root’s words. She growls “Shut up” causing Root to grin before taking out a sandwich for herself and taking a huge bite moaning at the taste. “Glad to see you finally took a shower you were starting to stink. That smell must be your left over stench” she smirks and Root narrows her eyes and shows her the finger.
“She had an errand for me to run today, got out of the house for a couple of hours” Root tries to steal a bite of Shaw’s sandwich only to be smacked in the forehead.
“Yours is in the bag” she said in a way of explanation before limping over slightly to the couch. And there was that stench again. “Root seriously what is that fucking smell?” Shaw grimaced.
“I don’t know sweetie, maybe the garbage needs to go out” Root appeared beside her with a first aid kit. Shaw rolled her eyes but let Root tend to her grazes resulting her being in only her sports bra and boy shorts, Root definitely appreciated the sight.
“You gonna ogle at me all day or actually clean my cuts before they get infected?”
Root sighed fondly “Sameen, did it hurt when you fell from heaven?”
Shaw screwed up her face “Did it hurt when you rose from hell?” she shot back.
Root grinned and then half winked as she pressed a gentle kiss to the inside of the shorter woman’s thigh “Maybe”.
After Root was done worrying over Shaw she went to use the bathroom on the first floor, not feeling to go up the stairs in her tired and painful state. As she approached the stench seemed to be strongest here but the toilet and sink were fine and Root didn’t seem bothered, maybe it was her tired mind.
Shaw was half way through her pee slouched over with her hands covering her face when she felt something thick and slimy run across her foot. Shaw eyes shot open as she halted her pee and jumped from the toilet, whipped out the spare gun from under the sink “What the fuck?!”
Shaw pulled back the curtain from the tub for her jaw to drop and eyes just about to pop out of her head, and accidentally pulled the trigger into the wall of the shower “Root!” she yelled.
At the immediate sound of gunfire Root whipped out a gun of her own and raced to the bathroom to see Shaw, in no immediate danger but a hole in the shower wall and now the splashing of water “Oh now look what you’ve done Shaw!” Root growled frustrated as she knelt beside the tub and turned on the nozzle.
Shaw quickly pulled her boy shorts back up to gawk at Root “What I’ve done! You’re the one who has a fucking giant squid in our bathtub! What the fuck Root?!”
“And now you’ve gone and made him upset, thanks for that” Root chastised as if it were a normal everyday thing.
Maybe Root hit her head on the mission, yeah that would explain, whatever the fuck this was.
Shaw didn’t even have the strength for this right now she was way too tired, maybe she was imagining it, yeah definitely. Holy shit, do I need some sleep.
Shaw gently put the gun back under the sink before limping out the bathroom “Scared the pee right back in me” she mumbled still in shock.
Shaw stopped once more to turn around and momentarily glanced at the fact that Root was serenading a fucking squid and turned to hobble back out to the couch before yelling over her shoulder “No sex for a week!”
Root suddenly stopped what she was doing and turned off the tap before chasing after her girlfriend “Oh no, no, no. You can’t do that to me Sameen!” her eyes widening fretfully.
“Just watch me” came the snarl as Shaw prepared herself for a nap on the couch.
“Baby, have I ever told you how much I love you” Root tried.
“Go love that pee stealing, stomach wrenching, stink ass piece of shit Root. And if that thing isn’t out of this apartment within the hour, I’m gonna make it no sex for two weeks”
Root eyes widened as she quickly raced back to the bathroom conversing with The Machine. If this thing wasn’t out of here soon, they were definitely be having Calamari for dinner.