Shiny Things

Red vs. Blue
F/F
F/M
M/M
G
Shiny Things
Summary
They never asked to be heroes, but they've been chosen to keep the galaxy safe anyways. With middle fingers raised, they'll take on the universe's sick sense of humor.Find out what happens when a group of idiots become mech pilots in an intergalactic battle....We're (maybe?) (probably?) most definitely screwed.{An AU inspired by Voltron: Legendary Defender and Mass Effect.}
Note
Legal Disclaimer: I do not own Red vs. Blue or any of the show’s characters. They are the rightful properties of Rooster Teeth.
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The Real Question (Part Two)

Following the meeting, Carolina headed up to Kimball’s office for reasons that weren’t at all “manufactured” despite her know-it-all brother’s remark to the contrary.

The redhead was rather surprised when the door to said office opened as she made her approach, a noticeably weary-looking Kimball stepping out into the corridor beyond. Vanessa Kimball was known to seal herself inside her office for hours at a time to ensure all sorts of matters regarding Chorus’ operations were running smoothly.

Kimball’s head jerked towards Carolina’s direction, and for a very brief moment the two remained in frozen silence regarding one another. It was Carolina who finally broke it, squaring her shoulders and smiling slightly, “Leaving early?” She asked, “That isn’t like you.”

“Carolina,” a slight frown was on Kimball’s face at having been discovered, but she seemed to win an internal debate when she walked towards the other woman, “There’s somewhere I’d like to go.” Kimball raised a dark eyebrow, “Care to come with me?”

“Of course.” Carolina replied, rather curious now since Kimball didn’t often invite her on her meanderings around Chrous.

They were off quickly, Kimball walking at hurried pace through the streets of the capital city of Armonia with clear intent until she arrived at the military training grounds. To further add to Carolina’s growing confusion, the Elvari opted not to enter any of the buildings there, choosing instead to wander some into the nearby forest. The former Freelancer was only familiar with the area because they used it to simulate fights in heavily wooded terrains, so Carolina was rather relieved to recall that no such training had been on the agenda for today since neither woman was outfitted with their armor.

Kimball made herself comfortable at the base of a fairly large tree, motioning for the redhead to join her, “I come here to think sometimes.” She stated softly in response to Carolina’s questioning regard as the half-Veroni sat down beside her.

Carolina inquisitively raised an eyebrow, “Is there something wrong with the parks?”

A soft smile spread across Kimball’s face, “Nothing’s wrong with them, really.” She informed Carolina as she ran one of her hands across a tree root, “It’s just that, when I go to them I feel obligated to make the rounds. You know, talk to people even when I’d rather think. I have to see what concerns haven’t made it to my office yet.” There was a sad, faraway glint in her brown eyes as she added, “I feel the need to visit Doyle’s memorials more than I already do.”

Carolina knew that the leader of Chorus did those things quite often already, but it wasn’t her place to say anything. She remembered a lighter currently resting in her pocket, the weight currently resting on her thigh as she sat.

Kimball stretched and leaned back against the tree trunk, looking up at the dense foliage overhead, “Sometimes I just need time to myself to think.” She said softly.

“Ah.” Was all Carolina could think to say in response, a fairly large part of her feeling rather touched that she’d even been invited to such a private moment for the Elvari.

A second later, and Kimball seemed to be frowning thoughtfully at nothing and everything all at once, “I wonder if I’m doing the right thing.” She mused out loud.

“You mean about meeting the Arenians in neutral territory?” Carolina surmised.

Kimball nodded tersely in response, “Security has been strengthened and revamped since that last breach, so we’re more secure than ever. But I’m still uncomfortable about arranging meetings here on Chorus.” She sighed, “At the same time, what happened at Trocadero can’t be ignored either.”

The alternative was simply to ignore everything and everyone, and both women knew Chorus couldn’t survive long doing that. Not in this war.

“We’ve been at a stalemate with Charon ever since the breach.” Carolina reminded her, “Allies are hard to come by for a planet with a populace as varied as our own.”

When had she started thinking of Chorus as her home, of the Reds and Blues as her family? Carolina tried to push those questions to the side for the moment. They weren’t particularly important now.

Kimball frowned, “That’s true, but…”

“I don’t necessarily trust Temple’s group either,” Carolina told Kimball when the dark-skinned woman trailed off, “Especially since there seems to be a distinct lack of intel on them.” In her experience that usually indicated someone had gone through great effort to scrub it away, “But we need potential allies, and it’s better to investigate someone’s true goals up close.” Carolina grinned reassuringly, “I might prefer the more direct approach, but I’m no slouch when it comes to infiltration either.”

“So,” Kimball regarded her carefully then, “You’re sure you want to be a part of this mission?”

Carolina nodded, “I’d like to do my part to protect my family here on Chorus.” She plowed on before she could think too much about her wording, “If you focus on your tasks here, I’ll be more than happy to do the same there.”

Kimball nodded determinedly in response, “Just be careful, all right?”

“I’ll make sure we all will.”

The two lapsed into a comfortable silence then, not commenting on their fingers nearly touching or on how close their shoulders were as the wind swept through the tree branches above their heads.

*****

“So you knew Surge back when you were living on one of the Arc Ships, sir?” Frank “Doc” DuFresne asked as he watched Sarge and Doctor Emily Grey continue their work in Sarge’s laboratory and workshop area, both currently elbow-deep inside Lopez’s open chest cavity.

“Por favor, por todos los medios, sigue hablando como si deberían distraerse.” {“Please, by all means, keep talking as if they should be distracted.”}

Lopez muttered something sarcastically in Spanish at the purple medic, who merely smiled innocently back in response.

“That’s right.” Sarge stated matter-of-factly to the Elvari’s question, “In fact, we grew up together.” He frowned slightly a second later, voice laced in slight regret, “Hadn’t really kept in touch after I left for Blood Gulch though.”

“So this will be a chance for you to reconnect then?” Grey asked, smiling brightly at the prospect, “How nice!”

“Hablando de reconectar...” {“Speaking of reconnecting…”}

Lopez looked over at his hand resting on a nearby counter. Doc started a bit when the unattached appendage’s digits began to move.

“I reckon so.” Sarge mused, though he frowned slightly all the same, “Though neither of us are too keen on sentiment.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t say that.” Grey smiled up at him, wiping a bit of oil across her brow, “Clearly you have some sentiment in you if you’re willing to go through all this effort to upgrade Lopez.”

“...Mejor no consigo una máquina de fax en ningún lado.” {“…I just better not get a fax machine anywhere.”}

Sarge chuckled and fondly dabbed at the oil smear on Grey’s face with a nearby hand rag, “You know just what to say to make a fella blush.”

“And you’re quite skilled at being a charmer too!” Grey smiled back just as warmly, “I take it that means you’ll be going on this mission to catch up with your friend?”

The red-armored soldier nodded, “Of course! Wouldn’t miss it for anything.” Sarge took a second to curiously glance over at Doc, “When did you end up meeting these fellas, Doc?”

Doc beamed at having been asked a question, “Their Arc Ship would sometimes come to the station for supplies and refueling, and I was assigned to look after the health of the crew.” The Elvari frowned slightly in thought, “They seemed as if they’d been through some tough times.”

“I can imagine.” Sarge surmised, “The Arenian way of life ain’t for the faint of heart.”

“But that just means you will have all the more to catch up on when you and Surge see each other again, yes?” Grey asked.

“Of course!” Sarge puffed out his chest proudly, “Why, I can’t wait to show off Lopez here and the Warthog.” He grinned, “Sharing battle stories is one of our favorite pastimes.”

“Careful there, Sarge, or I might get jealous.” The dark-skinned Veroni teased.

“No need for that now, little lady.” Sarge touched her arm gently in a clearly affectionate way, “I’m a one-person kind-of guy, after all.”

“Ever the romantic.” Doctor Grey mused with a smile, her purple-liked cheeks darkening from a blush.

“¿Podrías por favor no coquetear tanto cuando trabajas conmigo?” {“Could you please not flirt so much when you’re working on me?”}

Whatever he said, it was clear Lopez’s tone was exasperated.

Standing up, Doc smiled at the trio, “Well, I should go and see if Donut wants any help preparing for the mission.” As he turned to leave, he nearly stumbled into Sheila heading into the workshop, “Whoa!” He let out a nervous laugh as he side-stepped to let the petite brunette through, “Sorry about that, Sheila!”

“That’s quite all right.” She stated amicably enough, “Take care, Doc.” As he left and she entered the space, the Veroni surveyed the goings-on around her, “Hello.” Sheila said to both potential mad scientists, “I just came by to see how Lopez was faring, and ask if I could do anything to help.”

Lopez’s disembodied hand waved at her, and she kept her gaze on his helmet as she smiled and waved back.

*****

“Remind me why we’re here again?” Leonard Church asked Tex as he warily regarded the lieutenants.

They were seated by the rookies in the mess hall, which used to be a place Church liked until he realized people assumed his being there meant he wanted to socialize. He did not. Ever.

Tex raised a blond eyebrow at Church’s question, clearly more amused than anything else at his obvious discomfort, “Because Palomo invited us and you pretending not to have heard him could only work so much when he was less than a meter away?” She reminded him.

“Right. Damn it.” He muttered under his breath, suddenly reminded that he pretty much hated everyone.

Church watched as Palomo held out a bite of his salad on a fork in front of Jensen’s face, “Katie, say ah!”

The Strassian’s only response was to laugh and shake her head, “No way, Charlie!” She did, however, accept the small forkful of salad being set on her plate, both lieutenants blushing at the exchange.

“So, Bitters,” Tex stated conversationally, drawing the attention of one of the only two lieutenants not currently mingling with their peers, the other being an awkward and socially inept Matthews, “I heard you know these Arenians that reached out to Kimball?”

“A while ago, yeah.” The dark-skinned lieutenant admitted quickly when all eyes at the table turned towards him, “They helped support the colony I lived at before my family moved to Chorus.” Bitters shrugged indifferently, “They seemed pretty decent back then.”

“But a whole fuckton can change in the span of years.” Church muttered darkly, clearly remembering some rather troubling things that he pretended were still in his subconscious.

Tex regarded Church for a moment before saying, “Rather ominous, but true.” Her eyes wandered back towards the rookies in their midst.

“It doesn’t really matter.” Bitters told the group, “I guess I’ll catch up with them or some shit if I get assigned to the mission, but I’m not thrilled with anticipation. No skin off my back either way.”

“Bitters…” Matthews began, though he trailed off and bit his lip when he couldn’t think of what else to say.

“Young people drama.” Church muttered under his breath, which promptly had Tex elbowing him.

“Well, it would be cool if they turned out to be okay guys.” Kai stated in a loud but thoughtful manner, “Because we could then have a welcome party and hire some kickass strippers!”

“Yeah!” Palomo eagerly added, though he quickly smiled sheepishly when he caught Jensen regarding him in a rather scrutinizing manner.

“Oh, a dance routine!” Jax Jonez suddenly plopped down in the empty seat next to Andersmith, “I’m glad I’ll get the chance to film it.”

“There will be no strippers!” Andersmith stated in his firm but kind voice, “That would be a huge budgetary issue for Chorus. We don’t have the funds to spare!”

“Killjoy!” Kai stuck her tongue out at the dark-haired lieutenant, but she was grinning all the same.

“That’s your only argument against it?” Church asked Andersmith, the cobalt-lined Veroni raising an eyebrow, “Really?”

“What if we got them for super cheap?” Kai asked, winking conspiratorially, “I might know some people.”

Andersmith actually looked like he was considering it as Volleyball shot Kai a rather impressed look, “You really do know some fascinating people, Kai.” She said.

“I know, right?” Kai’s grin widened, “I’ve got to show you my contacts list over dinner tomorrow.”

Church raised a dark eyebrow yet again, but was soon distracted by Tex suddenly shoving a food-filled fork in his line of sight, “Say ah.” She told him, her smirk causing even her brown eyes to shine.

“No fair, you’re stealing my move!” Palomo exclaimed indignantly, though he quieted down and smiled when Jensen put her hand on his elbow.

“Goddamn it.” Church muttered under his breath with a groan before quickly taking the proffered bite of food as his face heated up, his middle finger going up instinctively at the whip cracking sounds suddenly erupting from the table.

*****

David Washington couldn’t help but pause at the sight of Dylan Andrews at Tucker and Junior’s door as he made his way through his apartment complex.

“Now it will only be for when Tex isn’t available, so it shouldn’t be too big of a deal, but how are your CPR skills?” The former Freelancer overheard Tucker anxiously ask the human reporter, “Your general first aid ones?”

Dylan let out a soft sigh, “Relax, Tucker. I have watched children before.” She tilted her head slightly to the side, “They aren’t much different from cats, right?”

Tucker’s face visibly fell, as if he’d just realized he’d made some sort of terrible mistake.

“That was a joke.” Dylan was quick to assure him, straightening her posture as she added, “I’ll do my best to look after Junior if you’re put on the mission to Iris.”

The dark-skinned mech pilot relaxed somewhat, nodding his head, “Yeah, I mean, you’ve been keeping that Jax kid alive, right?”

“Which is no easy task, believe me.” The reporter noted wryly, “Junior will be a breeze in comparison.”

“I’ll try to keep an eye out for him on site.” Tucker assured her.

Dylan gave a slight pause at the assurance, shifting slightly where she stood, “Thank you.” She stated rather awkwardly yet also relieved.

“Dude, I should be thanking you for doing me such a solid in the first place!”

“Junior is an amazing child. I’m actually looking forward to it.” Dylan told him.

“Yeah, he’s the best.” Tucker stated proudly, rubbing the top of Junior’s head affectionately when the young boy came to the door.

“I’ll see you later then.” Dylan said as she waved to them both and turned to leave, only pausing briefly at seeing Washington observing their conversation. Both inclined their heads in way of greeting to one another before she left.

“Wash!” Tucker and Junior both exclaimed his nickname at once as they crowded around him. The Strassian grinned as he picked Junior up into a hug.

“What’s up?” He heard Tucker ask from nearby.

“I should be asking you the same thing.” Washington noted, jokingly adding as he glanced towards Tucker, “Did I just witness you having a conversation with a female that didn’t involve horrible flirting?”

Tucker rolled his eyes, “Fuck you, my flirting’s awesome!” At Washington’s dubious look, he coughed and changed the subject, “Dylan’s doing me a favor by helping to look after Junior, so it’s not like I want to piss her off.”

At the shared look between the former Freelancer and his son, Tucker coughed again, “I think she might be married, and I draw the line at being a homewrecker. There’s enough single ladies out there for me, if you know what I mean. Bow-chicka-bow-wow.”

“Huh.” Washington mused, regarding him as if for the first time and causing Tucker to fidget self-consciously.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Washington smirked, “It’s just good to know that you have limits.”

Tucker bristled, “Fuck you, dude. I’m all about standards.”

“Uh-huh.” Washington shot him a teasing dubious look, and Tucker elbowed him playfully in the ribs with a smile on his face.

“We’re just about to go get food!” Junior exclaimed happily, “Wanna join us, Wash?”

Washington eyed Tucker questioningly, blushing only a little when Tucker nodded his head earnestly, “It’s fine by me, Wash,” he assured him, sharing a conspiratorial nod with his son, “It’d be nice to make sure you got a solid meal in you for once.”

“I…I eat healthy all the time!” The blond Strassian countered as the three began making their way towards the mess hall.

Tucker laughed, “Who the fuck said anything about eating healthy?” He asked Washington, winking down at his son, “We’re going for straight up comfort junk food, right?”

“Yeah!” Junior grinned happily, linking his hands with theirs.

Washington looked from Junior over to Tucker and returned the other man’s smile as they both squeezed Junior’s hands a little, “Well, who could say no to that?” He asked them both.

*****

“I still don’t get why you needed to be in your speedos to clean Pink.” Dexter Grif mused out loud to Franklin Delano Donut as he, Donut, and Richard “Dick” Simmons stood in front of their freshly cleaned mechs, admiring their handiwork.

Donut was currently in the process of putting his pants back on, and he looked towards Grif with a mischievous wink and smile, “Oh, that was mostly for your benefits.” He told them both rather eagerly, “When I clean, I like to be free and clear so that my clothes stay clean too.” The Elvari shrugged, “It just makes perfect sense!”

“Suddenly I want to take back ever stepping into your apartment to admire how clean it is.” Simmons was quick to inform him, eyes very obviously not looking at Donut.

Grif was busy rubbing at his eyes, “And I want to get the mental picture I have right now out of my head.”

“Really?” Donut tilted his head thoughtfully to the side, “Doc is always saying we should have a cleaning party together to trade techniques!”

“Look, Donut, the kinds of crazy things you get into in your private life—” Grif began with an exasperated sigh before he was interrupted.

“Not a bad job.”

All three men started at the newcomer’s voice coming from behind them, and they turned to see Four Seven Niner and Caboose standing at the mech hangar’s entrance. The tan-skinned Arenian female in silver who had spoken up before motioned over her shoulder to her transport vessel, “Wanna try giving my ship a good scrub down too?”

“Oh!” A now fully-clothed Donut clapped his hands together excitedly at the prospect, “We’re going to need so much more suds then, and an even bigger hose to get every nook and cranny nice and wet!”

The pilot looked over at the other two, her eyebrow raised as if silently asking them if she even wanted to know, to which Grif and Simmons were both quick to shake their heads simultaneously.

“We’re going to get Freckles to play fetch!” Caboose stated quite happily from beside his adopted sister.

She nodded her head, “Reflex testing that Doctor Grey wants done ASAP.” Niner further elaborated.

“Exercise is very important.” The younger blond Arenian intoned in a surprisingly serious voice.

“Hmph. It’s overrated if you ask me.” Grif was quick to say as he shrugged indifferently to Caboose’s comment.

Simmons rolled his eyes, “Of course you would think that.”

“What’s this about exercise?” Doc’s voice cut in as the brown-haired Elvari made his way towards them from the entrance too, Donut’s face lighting up in the exact same moment.

“They’re going to play fetch with Freckles.” Donut said in way of explanation before adding hopefully, “Want to come with to watch?”

“Sure.” Doc nodded his head, “Exercise is always great. I’m sure it’s the same even for mechs.”

“Again, overrated.” Grif muttered.

Doc laughed, “Oh, come on, Grif! You should really give some things a chance before you say stuff like that!”

“I did. Once.” He responded flatly, “Nearly died.”

“But if you trust that things will be okay, maybe it will work out differently?” Doc was quite persistent, “Like with meeting up with Temple and them.”

Grif frowned at that last remark and crossed his arms over his chest, “Or I could nearly die all over again.” He muttered rather bitterly, “Along with everyone else too.”

An awkward silence fell over the group. Simmons reached his hand out unsurely, but didn’t quite touch Grif, afraid he might make the wrong move.

Donut coughed awkwardly a moment later and grabbed Doc’s arm, causing the other Elvari to blush all the way to the long tips of his ears, “Come on, you guys!” He told Four Seven Niner and her brother, “Let’s go and see how good Freckles is at tossing!”

“I wouldn’t have worded it that way, but sure.” Four Seven Niner appeared rather grateful that the tension had been broken by Donut’s exclamation.

“Yay!” Caboose clapped happily once more, “Freckles will be so happy so many friends are cheering him on!”

“That’s the spirit, Caboose!” Donut chimed in as he started dragging Doc off after the siblings.

Which just left Grif and Simmons standing by their newly shining mechs, Simmons frowning in thought and looking awkwardly to the side, “Wanna talk about it?” He asked after a few more moments of hesitation.

Grif sighed, “Not really.”

Simmons’ shoulders slumped down slightly at the rejection, but he knew he shouldn’t press further. After all, the Strassian still hadn’t told Grif everything in regards to himself yet either, “Want to go see Freckles accidentally wipe out a building like last time?” Simmons tried instead.

Grif turned to stare at the redhead, a grateful look on his tanned features as he shoulder-bumped Simmons, “Now you’re talking.”

Simmons tried to hide his blush at the sudden and unexpected physical contact, though he no doubt failed miserably when Grif unthinkingly grabbed his hand to pull him along after the others.

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