Lockdown
“I should’ve said something.” She muttered to herself, ashamed at pissed at herself, because this was her fault, yet she still decided to be selfish and hide Jake’s death for the sake of keeping her secret. Damn, she was so stupid, and she felt so useless. What she did was almost as bad as killing him, and she couldn’t help but believe that it should be her with her guts splayed out on that stage.
“What?” Brooke called from inside the shower, her voice cracking and breaking, which only made Audrey fell worse. Brooke was broken, very obviously broken. Audrey wanted to comfort her, but her thoughts kept her from doing just that. Who’s fault is it that she’s this broken She asked herself mentally, oh right, you, because all you ever do to this town is hurt it, maybe it’s time for the town to get revenge on you. Her thoughts made her tear up, not because of how brutal they were, but because she knew they were right.
“No.” Brooke admitted, and Audrey heard the shower shut off and Audrey heard the water turn off as Brooke finished her shower, so she quickly wiped her eyes and made herself look like nothing, other than Jake’s death of course, was wrong. She watched as Brooke pulled the shower often, revealing herself. She had a towel wrapped around her, and her face was blotchy, but at least now she wasn’t drenched in her late boyfriend’s blood. “This all seems so unreal, I was just texting him!” She cried, holding the towel up with one hand and wiping her tears with the other.
“What? What do you mean?” She asked, and only hoped it didn’t sound suspicious, but Brooke was too distressed to even care much. She just walked over to her, grabbing her phone from a nearby table. Audrey felt like how Brooke looked, but she couldn’t show it, because it would look weird for her to be this upset about Jake’s death. Yes, they had gotten relatively close, but it had only been around three months of them being friends, not like Brooke, who had had him around her entire life. Said girl snapped Audrey out of her stupor, by putting her phone in her face.
“See for yourself.” She said, watching as she swiped to open the phone and clicked her way to the ‘messages’ app. It didn’t take long to find his name in the collection, since she had texted him last. Her ringed thumb clicked on him, and she was horrified at the fact that the killer had been texting as Jake for quite a few days. She gulped, handing Brooke back her phone, and trying to figure out something to say, but Brooke wasn’t finished. “I was so rude to him Audrey! All those horrible things I said, and I didn’t even say it to his face, I texted it to him! We were fighting, and now, I’ll never get a chance to apologize.” Brooke said, letting more tears fall, to which Audrey just pulled her into a tight hug, even though she was still wet from the shower.
“Hey, hey, Brooke, he knew you loved him, and he was so hopelessly in love with you, that he could never let himself believe that you hated him.” She said, ignoring the fact that he clothes were slowly soaking up the water that clung to Brooke’s skin. She just rocked the blonde girl back and forth, trying to stop the tears that were escaping her eyes. Once Brookes breathing had calmed, she pulled back, keeping her hands on Brookes shoulders as she looked into her eyes. “Even though you said that, you know it probably wasn’t him, it was probably his…” Audrey said, letting her sentence fade because she didn’t want to hurt Brooke.
“Killer.” Brooke completed, with a breathy voice that caused a flood of guilt to go over Audrey, making her want to cut, again. But she tried to swallow the feeling as best as she could, even though that meant she was going to have to sit in her unbearable guilt until they finally let them all leave. The look on Brooke’s face didn’t help either, but Audrey felt she couldn’t look away, she had to see what she had done to this town, and the people in it. She watched as Brooke shook her head slightly, accidentally spraying water everywhere, as she looked around for clothes. “Do they have anything for me to wear? Or do they just want me to wander the halls naked?” She asked, obviously trying to change the subject, and Audrey happily obliged, picking up the cheer leading uniform and holding it up.
“This is a joke? Right?”
***
Audrey pushed her hway into the study hall room where they were keeping the students who had stayed for the assembly. The first thing her eyes looked for was a tall boy with brown hair, who was talking to none other than Zoe Vaughn. She couldn’t explain it, but seeing them so close after Zoe had apparently dumped him pissed her off. And there was something else there too, something that connected to the words ‘He ran to her, he’ll always run to her’, deep down, she knew what it was, Jealousy, but she wasn’t ready to admit it. She knew she didn’t deserve him, or his kindness, so she let her facial expression become a glum one, and started to walk off.
“Audrey!” she heard someone chirp, probably Emma, since she was probably wondering how Brooke was doing, but to her surprise, Noah was jogging over to her. His flannel was billowing behind him slightly, and a concerned, yet sad, look on his on face as he came up to her. She wanted to keep walking, because of the little voice in her head telling her she doesn’t deserve him, but the reality of the situation was, she’s weak. The only person who she could confide in was gone, and she wanted comfort from the boy who had always been by her side, as much as she didn’t deserve it.
One look at her distressed face, and Noah had his arms around her small form, hugging her tightly to him. She wrapped her scar clad arms around him too, clenching the material of his flannel into her fists, because she didn’t want to let go of him, she didn’t want to lose him. Noah leaned down and kissed the top of her head, taking as much comfort from the hug as he was giving. For Audrey, it was a moment of relief and safety from the rest of the world, from the razors on her bedside table, from the killer, from her guilt, even though she knew that Zoe was glaring at her intensely. They stayed there, holding onto to each other, for who knows how long.
“Hayley Meyers? You're needed for questioning.” A police officer announced, and they pulled apart to look at the officer that was looking at a certain brunette that Audrey knew all too well. But, she didn’t expect her the girl - Hayley - to turn towards her with a sour, accusatory look on her face. Noah immediately straightened his posture, and Audrey simply glared through her long, black bangs, giving off an aggressive vibe.
“What did they ask you?” Hayley spat to Audrey nastily, with her red-headed friend crossing her arms in an attempt to seem threatening, but it just came across as bitchy. The cop that had come to get her was looking impatient, so she keep herself from blowing up on Hayley.
“They haven’t questioned me yet.” She said simply, yet coldly, and Hayley rolled her eyes as she turned around, mumbling something about how her being questioned made no sense. The cop followed her out of the room, eyeing Audrey suspiciously for a second, before closing the door behind them, and walking swiftly down the hallway. Audrey stayed in her defensive pose, staring at the closed door, and she didn’t even notice Noah walk away to go and talk to Zoe again.
“Hey, Audrey!” A quiet voice came from somewhere on her right, snapping her out of her trance, and when she looked over, she saw Emma’s head poking out from around a bookcase. She looked distressed, but like she was trying to hide it, and she started heading over to her quickly, and turned her head to make a confused and concerned face at Noah. That was when she noticed he was gone, her eyes found him and Zoe, talking with almost no space in between them, and Audrey felt a pang on her heart. Especially when Zoe pulled Noah into an intimate hug, her eyes locked with Audrey’s, and she gave her a look that seemed to say ‘see? I can do this too’.
Audrey just turned back to Emma before she got to upset and angry, and strode over, ducking around the bookcase and coming face to face with a concerned Kieran, and a panicked Emma. She understood why both of them seemed off, but why were they being to secretive about it? What’s the point? Everyone had seen Jake’s body fall, and if they hadn’t because they were looking at their phones, they were late, or they were going to the bathroom, they found out pretty fast.
“Hows Brooke?” Kieran asked, which confused her slightly since she could tell they had something they wanted to tell her. But, she passed it off as he was just trying to make sure his friend was okay, and give Emma a moment to compose herself. She leaned against the bookcase, eyeing them suspiciously, trying to figure out what they were hiding. And that thought sent her into overdrive, she didn’t know why, but she started panicking. Did someone else die? Do I have another body to add to my count? She thought, trying not to let it show on her face. Oh god, do they know?! She subconsciously touched her wrist, but only Kieran seemed to notice her strange behaviour.
“She’s…” She started, trying to take the attention off herself, but hesitant to tell Emma about how horrible Brooke truly was at this point. The bookcase was practically the only thing supporting her, so she took a deep breath, trying to regain her composure before Kieran asked her if she was alright. She knew he was going to, she could see the question written all over his stubble clad face. “wrecked, they’re keeping her in solitary, away from gen pop, for obvious reasons.” She finished, and hoped that Emma would freak out, since Brooke is her best friend, but she seemed more focused on something else.
Emma reached into her bag, pulling out something small, handheld and silver out of it. Audrey wasn’t sure what it was, she thought it was a phone at first, but why would Emma be freaking out about her phone? Had the killer texted her? She found herself reaching forward and snatching it before Emma even got the chance to reach out and hand it to her. She pulled it to herself, pressing to ‘Home Screen’ button to turn it on, and furrowing her brows in confusion. This was….
“It’s Jake’s yeah, I checked.” Emma said, obviously trying to hold back tears, which made Kieran rub her arm in an attempt to comfort her. But Audrey was entranced by the phone in her hands, she turned it over, only to see blacks marks made on the back of the phone. It read ‘Property of Jake’ and those words alone made her want to vomit, this guy had taken her friends phone off his dead body, or maybe he was alive when he took it, still, he stole it, and had been pretending to be Jake for the last few days. The thought alone was completely revolting. “The Killer planted it in my backpack… and now I have to figure how to explain that to the Sheriff.” Emma started, but Audrey was not prepared to let her do that.
“No! Emma, look.” She licked her lips, trying to think of a way to explain her thought process that didn’t make it sound like she was the killer, or reveal certain… things. Kieran looked at her, furrowing his brows in confusion. Since she had taken so long to respond, Emma just turned around and tried to leave again, but Audrey grabbed her arm and pulled her back. “Look, whoever this is. Whoever’s doing this. This is a game to them, okay? It’s a sick, and it might be a game to them, but to us, It’s life or death.” She said, putting emphasis on her final word to get her point across.
Emma covered her mouth to cover up a choked sob, but she shook her head all the same. She was breaking, and Audrey felt selfish and horrible, so, she reached over, pulling her into a tight, protective hug.
***
Audrey shrunk into herself as she saw Stavo walk up to his tablet, looking at it mournfully before picking it up, and shoving it roughly in his bag. She felt horrible, because even if he was some nutjob who liked doodling dead people, he didn’t deserve that. ‘It’s not what you think! It’s just a comic!’ his words kept ringing through her mind, including the tone, the panic and fear is quivering voice. She looked down, trying to think of what he could she could do to make this right, but as he started walking away, she decided to just apologize.
“I’m gonna go say something.” She muttered, throwing her phone lightly onto her backpack, and standing up from her chair. Noah looked like he wanted to stop her, not that she saw, to keep her from doing something stupid and making it worse, but when he the phone lying on top her bag, he knew he had to look, especially after they’re strange conversation earlier ‘I meant texts!’ No, she meant calls, he could tell, after all, that’s what she had said. And that scared the shit out of him, he was worried for his best friend, for her safety, because it was obviously not a prank, not anymore. But even though Noah was being very conspicuous about it, Audrey hadn’t noticed, she just tried to apologize to Stavo. “I’ll pay to fix or… replace it.” she said shakily.
“Stay away from me, or I’ll break something you love.” Stavo replied threateningly, turning away from her without another word and stalking out of the room, and through the door, she could see Stavo walk up to Brooke, who was standing alone in the hallway, and pull her into a hug. Audrey turned away, feeling even more guilt start to well up in her chest. BRooke was sad because of her, Stavo was hurt because of her, Emma was scared because of her, everything was dangerous, because of her.
She did this. And she was going to pay for it, in her own way.
“That went more lord of flies than I was expecting.” Noah said, pulling her out of her thoughts as he walked up to her, with her backpack in his hand. She took it roughly away from him, not because she was angry at him, but because she was angry at herself, and wasn’t sure she could suppress her tears much longer. Her hands were shaking, so she just tossed the bag over her shoulder trying to cover it up by keeping them occupied.
“Yeah, the whole day.” She muttered, starting to charge out of the room as she felt tears spill over, and drip down his reddening cheeks. It frustrated her, because she wanted to talk to Noah, and she managed to get through the whole day without bursting into tears, but the second she had something she really wanted to talk about, they decided to overpower her. She wanted to explain to him that she wasn’t being paranoid for no reason, she wanted to tell him that she had reason for the way she acted.
“I was joking!” Noah said defensively, but she was already gone, and oddly enough, Zoe followed, leaving Noah alone in the hall. She felt bad, but she couldn’t bring herself to turn around, she just charged out of the building, not stopping until she reached the side of the building. Not many people had noticed her, or if they did, they hadn’t said anything. Everyone except Zoe, you had followed her. Just as she turned the corner so that no one could see her, Zoe popped out as well, wearing a sour expression on her face. She tried desperately to fight her tears back down, even though they were already pouring out of her eyes and slipping down her face.
Zoe looked terrifying to her, and she didn’t know if it was because of how she was feeling, or because of the fact that she had hugged Noah earlier. Either way, she was not looking forward to anything Zoe was about to say or do.
***
Audrey threw the door of her bedroom open, barreling inside, not even bothering to shut the door behind her. She didn’t care anymore, no one cared, not about her at least, Zoe had made that evidently clear when she followed Audrey earlier. It wasn’t for a friendly talk, or anything even remotely like that, it was because Zoe was jealous, and she obviously didn’t deal with that well in Audrey’s opinion. Zoe was right. Everything Zoe said was right, no matter how viciously she had said it.
“Stop clinging onto Noah like he’s your lifeboat, if he wanted to date you, he would be doing it already, or he would’ve at least shown some interest in you. Ya know, like how he treats me.” She said venomously as she watched tears stream down Audrey’s face, a smug smile tugged at her lips. Zoe wasn’t going to let Audrey take Noah from her, not some dyke who apparently can’t even choose a side, and feels the need to be into both guys and girls.
“You’re just a friend to him, nothing more, a poorly picked friend, obviously. But we both know what happens to friends, they come and go, and the day will come when you and Noah aren’t in each others lives anymore. Oh, but I will be, I will be on Noah’s arm.” She said, laughing a little as she pictured how cute they would be together.
Once Audrey was on her bed, grabbed her razor, she didn’t even bother putting it into the jar these days, she only ever did it when she knew someone was coming over, other than her dad, of course. Her dad never came in her room, they barely ever talked, and if they did, it was about how much of a failure Audrey was.
She let out a sobs, rolling up her sleeves and barely giving herself any time to think, she just plunged it into her arm, making a new line that mingled with the rest. She pulled it out of her arm, watching blood drip off the razor, and drip down her arm. She pressed it back into her arm, taking it slow this time, and relishing in the pain she felt she deserved. Until, she heard footsteps, she thought for a moment that it was her being paranoid, she almost always was, especially when she had all of her scars exposed like this. So, she just pressed it deeper in her arm. But that was when she heard a voice, and looked up to she the person it came from, staring at her.
“What the hell?”