Chapter 35
For Lexa, January had gone by in a haze of articles, meetings and clients. She was feeling it, there was no doubt about that and in truth, she was honestly exhausted, but the work kept coming in, so she simply kept working. Dropping her head down onto the table, she decided to just give herself just five minutes to rest her mind a bit.
****Incoming Skype Call****
Lexa glanced up at the screen and clicked the accept button. Clarke’s face appeared on the screen, but she didn’t speak, she only stared.
“What?” Lexa finally asked.
“I had a feeling that I’d find you in front of your laptop,” Clarke shook her head, looking slightly annoyed.
Lexa gave her a questioning look.
“Thanks for the ride.” Clarke responded.
Lexa’s eyes darted to the clock. Shit. “Fuck,” she winced. “Why didn’t you call me?”
“I did.” Clarke replied simply.
Lexa reached across the table and pushed the button on her phone. Six missed calls. “My ringer was off.” Lexa shook her head as she sat up fully. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine,” Clarke shrugged weakly. “One of the guys from the garage gave me a ride. He was nice.”
“I’ll make it up to you,” Lexa assured her. “Dinner? Friday night?”
“Can’t,” Clarke answered quickly. “I have plans.”
Lexa felt her stomach drop slightly. “Oh,” she nodded. “Saturday?”
“What about tonight?” Clarke asked, her voice sounding hopeful.
“Clarke,” Lexa shook her head. “I’m right in the middle of something here.”
Clarke’s shoulders dropped a bit. “I understand,” she told her, but the disappointment was clear in her face.
“Clarke,” Lexa’s brow furrowed. “I’m…”
“Don’t worry about it, Lex,” Clarke cut her off. “I have to go. I just wanted to let you know that I made it home okay. No worries.”
The screen went black and Lexa sighed, mentally scolding herself.
“You alright?” Anya asked as she came through the room.
“I forgot to pick up Clarke,” Lexa replied as she leaned back in her chair and rubbed her eyes.
“Seems like you’re forgetting a lot of things lately,” Anya told her.
“I’ve just been busy,” Lexa shook her head.
“Understatement of the year,” Anya scoffed and sat down. “You’ve been nonexistent. You even bailed on Jasper’s last weekend.”
“I had to,” Lexa insisted quickly. “I had a deadline.”
“I get it,” Anya nodded. “But, I think you need to take a step back. You’re going to burn yourself out.”
“I’m fine.” Lexa shook her head again. Not happening.
“So you keep saying,” Anya snapped lightly, “but, I can tell by looking at you that you’re not. You should take the night off. Go hang out with Clarke.”
“I think she’s pissed at me,” Lexa muttered quickly.
“All the more reason that you should go,” Anya crossed her arms.
“I have to get this done,” Lexa shook her head as leaned forward and she redirected her attention back to her laptop. “Besides, I’ll see her at Polis tomorrow night. She has rehearsal and I told her I’d come watch.”
“Yeah,” Anya said dryly as she got to her feet. “That was last Thursday.”
Lexa’s eyes shot up. “No, it wasn’t.”
“Actually,” Anya nodded as she gave her a rather hard pat on the shoulder, “it was.”
Lexa sat back in her chair. Shit. She closed her laptop.
Grabbing her stuff, Lexa quickly made her way out to her car. Okay. So maybe Anya had a point. Maybe she had been pretty forgetful and nonexistent. It wasn't necessarily intentional, she had just been busy, that was all - really busy. Lexa made a call from her car and ordered some food, hoping that it would pretty much be ready by the time she made it to the restaurant. Thankfully, it was and Lexa was able to run in and out and then quickly make her way to Clarke’s.
Luckily the traffic was light and she was able to make it there in hardly any time at all. Pausing at the front door, she took a deep breath and knocked.
Clarke opened the door and gave her a sarcastically curious look. “Who’re you?”
Lexa grinned weakly. “Well, once upon a time, I was your best friend,” she answered, “but, lately I’ve just, kind of been an absent jerk.”
Clarke’s eyebrows went up, she seemed slightly amused. “I might remember you,” she nodded. “What do you have there?” She asked, motioning to the bag in Lexa’s hand.
“Peace offering,” Lexa held up the bag.
“Chinese?” Clarke asked.
“Italian,” Lexa replied, again with a weak grin.
Clarke nodded, sighed and stepped aside to let her in.
Lexa stepped inside and took the food into the kitchen. Turning around she found Clarke staring at her. “What?” She asked curiously.
“Even though you’ve been a real ass lately,” Clarke stepped forward and pulled her into a hug, “I’m glad you came over.”
Lexa gave her a squeeze. “I’ve just been really busy.”
“You’ve been obsessed,” Clarke corrected her as she stepped away.
“I’m not obsessed,” Lexa disagreed with a slightly harsh tone. “I just have a lot going on.”
“I know,” Clarke took a slight step back and nodded. “I’ve been reading a lot of your stuff,” she added.
“Online or print?” Lexa asked curiously.
“Both,” Clarke answered simply. “Kind of hard not to. You’re name seems to be popping up a lot lately.”
“I’ve been busy,” Lexa repeated, as her eyes found the clock on the wall.
“Yeah,” Clarke sighed. “You said that already.”
Lexa nodded, feeling slightly stupid. Maybe this was a bad idea?
“So,” Clarke said suddenly, “to what do I owe the honor?”
“Listen, I’m sorry that I wasn’t there to give you a ride,” Lexa replied firmly. “Also, I’m sorry about last Thursday. I thought that your rehearsal was this week.”
Clarke shrugged. “It’s not like you’ve never heard me sing before,” she pointed out.
“I know,” Lexa told her, “but still, I like it and I said that I would be there, and then I wasn’t.”
“You weren’t.” Clarke nodded.
Lexa knew that she’d blown Clarke off a lot lately. She hadn’t meant to, really, she hadn't, but it just seemed to keep happening, so as uncomfortable as it was, she couldn’t really begrudge Clarke's obvious annoyance with her.
“You look exhausted,” Clarke told her, shaking her head.
“I am,” Lexa admitted and rubbed her eyes. “So, you want to eat?”
“Sure,” Clarke gave her a nod and sat down.
Lexa sat across from her and began pulling containers from the bag. “So, um, what’s been going on?”
Clarke took a deep breath. “Hm, life?” She replied. “Work, art, preforming at Polis.”
“Same old things then,” Lexa nodded as she glanced at the clock.
“Pretty much,” Clarke shrugged.
Again Lexa nodded, she was listening, but barely, her mind was already back on her unfinished article.
“I really think that you need to take a step back,” Clarke's voice broke into her thoughts.
“Huh?” Lexa said looking up.
“From your work.” Clarke explained. “It looks like it's taking quite the toll on you.”
“Fuck," Lexa scoffed lightly. "You sound like Anya,” she shook her head, feeling slightly annoyed. “I'm fine.”
They ate in an awkward silence. Though Lexa burned right through her food, Clarke seemed to be taking her time. Lexa could tell that Clarke was still mad, but she didn’t know what to do about it. She had hoped that having dinner with her would make up for some of it, but clearly that wasn’t working out. By the time they were finished cleaning up from their meal, she was just beyond uncomfortable and ready to get back to work.
“Okay,” Lexa finally said as she glanced at the clock again. “I guess, I’m going to go.”
“Seems like you’ve wanted to leave since you got here,” Clarke shrugged, “so…”
“Don’t do that,” Lexa shook her head quickly and eyed her.
“Do what?” Clarke asked. “Tell me, Lex, how many times have you looked at that damn clock since you walked through the door, huh?”
“What do you want me to say, Clarke?” Lexa snapped at her. “I have a lot going on right now and I don't have time for this.”
Clarke shook her head disappointedly, before turning and walking down the hall. “Thanks for dinner,” she said plainly.
Lexa watched as she walked into her bedroom and shut the door. “Great,” she muttered to herself as she walked toward the front door.
As she drove home she let out a sigh of frustration. Everyone needed to back off. She was doing the best she could. Yeah, so, she forgot a few things and she wasn't around as much – she was busy. She was working. She had articles due - lots of articles. Why did everyone act like that was a bad thing?
She had snapped at Clarke. God. Shit. She didn't mean to do that. It just happened. She’d text her when she got home and apologize. She really had gone over there with the intention of hanging out, but then everything just went all weird.
“Fucking shit,” Lexa muttered to herself as she walked through her front door and sat back down at the computer. She looked at the clock. Yep, she’d be working well into the night again.
Five hours later, the last of Lexa's energy was finally spent as she closed her laptop and put her head down. She couldn't do it anymore. She needed a couple of hours. Just a couple of hours and then she would get back to it again.