Chapter 6
Lexa could barely meet Clarke’s gaze as she sauntered up to the group’s table in their History class that morning.
Her dream from the night before and her inappropriate reaction to it is still rampant in her mind and it only gets worse when the blonde sits down directly opposite Lexa. Her eyes roam Clarke’s features and she swallows thickly as golden locks are flicked over a shoulder dramatically and a slight purse of the lips is directed at the notebook that is flicked open onto the table. Lexa clears her throat and directs her gaze to her own notebook which is filled to the brim with scribbles.
She doesn’t know whether it’s for her benefit or the slim chance that Clarke has suddenly developed an interest in making an effort in class but the girl is surprisingly full of ideas today. She puts forward proposals on how to present certain aspects of their presentation and adds her own take on the subject with confidence. Lexa stares open mouthed for most of it and decides to take a back seat, letting Clarke have her moment. But Clarke doesn’t once look at Lexa, in fact she acts as if she isn’t even there, instead directing her enthusiasm towards the other members of the group. If Lexa wasn’t so put out at being blatantly ignored she might have said she was impressed with the way the session had gone.
Clarke seems to make more of an effort in soccer practice also. Maybe she only pretended to be so bad at it before? To get more attention? Lexa muses, because now it’s almost as if she wants the opposite of attention. In the practice game she’s everywhere but working silently for the team at the same time, making well thought out passes and she actually has a few good shots on goal. At one point Lexa aims a nod and an impressed smile Clarke’s way. Clarke swiftly changes her expression to deadpan and turns the other way.
Lexa’s expression falters, the corners of her mouth turning down.
Now she doesn’t know what’s worse, Clarke’s pathetic attempts at gaining a rise out of her before the inevitable happened and she made the massive mistake of giving in and giving Clarke what she wanted or the Clarke that she’s on the receiving end of now, the Clarke that is simply pretending that Lexa is a figment of her imagination.
The brunette begins to feel a confusing uncomfortable feeling stirring in her gut and she doesn’t like it, she doesn’t like it one bit.
*****
Clarke gyrates her hips, eyes tight shut, nails digging into the chest of the boy beneath her making him hiss but it’s no use, this isn’t working. He doesn’t make her feel the way Lexa does, he doesn’t kiss like Lexa and he damn well doesn’t look like Lexa.
Instead of faking orgasm like she so often does she simply slows down to a stop and flings herself onto her back next to the boy.
“I’m sorry but this isn’t working, this was a mistake, can you leave please”
Clarke huffs, running a hand through her hair.
The boy scowls leaning up on his elbows, “what do you mean? This was your idea! You can’t leave me like this!”
“Yes I can, and I will, please leave” boxer shorts are thrown into the startled boy’s face and he begrudgingly gets off the bed to put his clothes back on.
An annoyed “bitch” is thrown Clarke’s way as he leaves the room but she doesn’t care.
In inviting a random boy from school back to her house thanks to the convenience of facebook she thought it would help to relieve the frustration of Lexa’s rejection but it hasn’t, in fact it has only made things worse. There’s a strange hollowness that resides in her chest and she just aches to have the brunette close again.
She lies still for a few minutes just staring at the ceiling contemplating what the hell is going on in her head right now. No answers come forth so after pulling on some sweats wearily she reaches into her bedside drawer, taking out a sketchpad and her new charcoals that she bought a few weeks ago.
Deciding to let her tools do the work for her instead of putting any mind to what she wants to create she simply puts charcoal to paper and lets her hand wander. Soon enough abstract shapes begin to take form and merge into one another, a mixture of black and green.
Clarke wonders if she’ll ever be able to stop the colour green from being at the forefront of her mind.
When she’s satisfied with her work and is feeling considerably better she makes her way downstairs to find Abby just returning home from a shift at the hospital.
“Hey sweetie, I bought home your favourite”
Clarke flinches at the name but can’t help the small grateful smile she directs at her mum at the sight of a pizza box from Luigi’s in Abby’s hand.
“Thanks, I’m starving”
Taking the box she takes it to the kitchen table and pulls up a seat, Abby taking the chair opposite with her own box.
Pulling a pepperoni slice off the top of the pizza Clarke dangles it above her head before dropping it in her mouth and groaning at the taste.
Frustrating sex with no release had definitely worked her up an appetite.
“So how was school?”
Clarke shrugs, “same as always”
“Which is?” Abby prompts, trying to get more than a couple of words out of her daughter these days was incredibly hard.
“Boring, tedious, too much drama”
Abby harrumphs in between bites of her pizza.
“Clarke, it isn’t supposed to be fun, you’re there to get an education and just ignore the drama!”
A disinterested look is the only response Abby gets so she leaves it at that.
“I thought we could watch a movie tonight?”
The look given Clarke is that hopeful that the blonde can’t help but sigh and agree to the idea, well, at least she won’t have to talk.
“You go pick a movie and I’ll make the popcorn” Abby chirps happily retrieving a dish out of the cupboard.
Perusing the vast DVD collection Clarke hums, she isn’t entirely sure what she wants to watch, until her eyes roam over a Lara Croft title which she pulls off the shelf in an instant.
Some action, a hot woman to ogle over, what more could you want?
Clarke can’t help but imagine once or twice.. or three times throughout the film that a certain brunette she knows could fit perfectly into the role of Lara.
She’s built for it with her well defined muscles and she would be a dead ringer for the action hero with her long hair pulled back into a tight ponytail away from her bronzed shoulders. Clarke almost groans at the thought and has to take a large handful of popcorn in an attempt to distract herself with something else.
That girl is going to be the death of her.
*****
“What’s up grumpy cat?” Raven chirps, flopping down next to Clarke on the bench her hunched over frame is frequenting shortly before first bell the next morning.
“Guess who I heard slagging you off on the bus this morning?”
“Who?” Clarke asks not really interested, tugging at a loose thread on her t-shirt.
“Tom Law, oh he’s not very happy with you leaving him in a sticky situation last night”. Raven snorts and Clarke shoots her a glare, offering a scoff of her own.
“I’ve never known you to give up half way before, was he really that bad?”
Clarke shrugs, “just wasn’t feeling it”.
A cool hand comes up to feel Clarke’s forehead which she bats away immediately.
“Hmm, I don’t think you have a fever but I’ll ask nurse if I can borrow one of her thermometers just to be on the safe side, that should wake you up too”
Raven wiggles her eyebrows suggestively and Clarke’s scowl only etches lines even deeper into her forehead, if that is even possible.
“Shut it Reyes”
“Jeeeeeeeeeeeeeesus Clarke alright alright, well I’ve got some more gossip for ya, I know how gossip cheers you up… Octavia said she was waiting for Lincoln across the road from grounders last night and guess who she saw sharing a milkshake? Only Katie and Lexa… apparently Katie went in for a kiss too!”
The prickle which is like a domino effect that washes over Clarke’s skin makes her shiver and her heart begins to thump viciously in her chest.
Only a day after rejecting Clarke, Lexa is going on dates with other girls? And may or may not have kissed someone else, someone else who isn’t Clarke?
Clarke almost growls at her shocked friend.
“Why the fuck did you think that little piece of information would make me feel better Raven? You know how I detest hearing anything about that name mentioned, that stuck up.. that.. that.. full of self importance.. that.. selfish.. UGH!”
Clarke knows deep down that she doesn’t mean any of it but it all comes tumbling out of her mouth anyway and she storms off with a flounce, leaving Raven in silence who only shuts her mouth in surprise about a minute later.
As she’s storming past the drama bulletin board on her way to Chemistry class she pauses and takes a few steps back, surveying a sheet of paper that she hadn’t noticed before.
‘COMING TO POLARIS IN MAY 2017, A PRODUCTION OF ‘JULIET’’
‘Juliet’ will be a modern day interpretation of the classic ‘Romeo and Juliet’ but with a twist. It’s the early stages of development and at the current time we are only looking for the two main leads at the moment, which will both be girls. If you are interested in auditioning please see our head of drama Mrs Emery at the end of school on Tuesday the 10th and please be prepared to show us what you’ve got, we appreciate that its short notice but we are eager to crack on with things.
Clarke hums with interest, there’s only one thing that she enjoys more than art and that’s drama. Everyone knows how much of a drama queen Clarke Griffin is and she’s taken part in every single school production since she joined the school.
She’s damn well going to audition and she’s damn well going to blow them all away.
“Come in”
Mrs Emery gives a wide smile when Clarke enters the drama studio.
“Ah Clarke, I’ve been expecting you, I’m glad you’ve shown, I think this part will be right up your street, conveniently enough according to my trusty assistant Harry here..”
She waves a hand to signal the eager boy seated crossed legged on the floor next to the desk, wide eyed with spiky dark hair and a proud grin stretched across his face.
“He informs me that you’re the last student to be seen. I must say it’s been quite a poor showing and we’ve already cast the other lead, she was outstanding, definitely stood out from all the rest, so that leaves you, there will be no need to audition my dear, the part of Juliet is yours”.
Clarke blinks. Well she definitely wasn’t expecting this. For sure she had proven her worth and style over the years but she had never just been given a part before without even auditioning.
“I can see you look shocked dear” Mrs Emory states, pushing her elaborate purple spectacles further up her nose.
“Well, slightly” Clarke admits, shifting where she stands.
“When we auditioned the other girl I just took one look at her and I just knew you would work off her talent with ease, that you would compliment each other perfectly, I’m sure you and Lexa will set our stage alight this May!”
At this Mrs Emory removes her spectacles and spins them around with a flourish between her bony fingers.
Lexa? No, no, no, no, NO.
How had she not noticed her? How had she not noticed her standing stoic as ever with hands clasped behind her back in the far corner of the room when she walked in, how?
Lexa steps forward and Clarke thinks that she must look like a gaping fish, she isn’t sure for how long she just stares but she only snaps out of her trance when Mrs Emory barks a concerned “Clarke?” at the statuesque figure.
Clarke splutters causing Lexa to glance to the floor awkwardly.
“I’m sorry? Lexa is the other lead? I’m sorry Mrs Emory but-“
But she isn’t allowed a chance to finish as Lexa interjects.
“I think what Clarke is trying to say is that we haven’t exactly… gotten on so well since my arrival at Polaris and this has come as a bit of a shock to her but I am more than prepared to try and make this work if she is, I wouldn’t want either of our possible enjoyment at taking part in the production compromised simply because we’ve had our.. Differences”.
Differences? Clarke inwardly scoffs. She wouldn’t call it that.
The hard, raised eyebrow, pleading look that Lexa gives her definitely jolts Clarke into backing down.
She sighs, “Alright, okay, we can at least pretend to get along, I think my acting abilities can cater to that”.
Clarke could have sworn she saw Lexa flinch at her words but she was too busy attempting to block her out of her line of sight to properly notice.
With that settled the girls are given their scripts for act I and Clarke has made her way into the carpark before Lexa catches up with her and a hand grabs hold of her wrist.
“Clarke”
The blonde turns around slowly, fixing Lexa with an expectant look, almost wanting to tap her foot in a silent ‘get on with it I can’t wait for you to get out of my sight’.
“Listen, I think we need to clear the air don’t you? If we’re going to make this work? Come back to my place and go through the script with me?”
Lexa sounds unusually out of breath and hurried her words that fast Clarke blinks for a few beats before fully taking in what she had said.
“Why would I want to go back with you Lexa? We can read the scripts on our own” Clarke states deadpan.
“Please” Clarke raises an eyebrow, Lexa pleading? Now that she could get used to.
“Fine” she grumbles and the brunette’s features seem to clear immediately from the tension that had been etched there previously.
It’s not as if she had anything better to do tonight, it’s not as if she planned on dragging another school mate to bed only to let them down moments later because they can’t compare to the infuriating brunette stood before her. She may as well be with the infuriating brunette. Besides, she would only find her creeping into her mind anyway.
*****
“Would you like a drink? Snack?” Lexa asks almost shyly.
“No thank you” Clarke’s tone is clipped and Lexa looks awkward as she begins to climb the stairs towards her bedroom, shutting the door behind them both when they enter.
“Right then” the brunette turns around to face Clarke only to find that the girl is stood right behind her, crowding into her space intimidatingly, a finger jabbing into her chest.
“Did it feel good Lexa?”
“Wh-what?” Lexa splutters out, her eyes narrowing in confusion.
“Rejecting me, did it feel good letting me down? You had your way with me and then that’s it, onto the next? Oh I’ve heard about Katie”
“Clarke” Lexa chokes out but there’s another jab at her chest and she begins retreating slowly.
“I’m not good enough for you is that it? I’ve heard you kissed? Is that right? Did her lips taste as good as mine, Lexa?”
By this point Lexa has retreated that far her rear bumps into her desk which her hands shoot back to grip, the surprise of the impact causing her to grunt softly.
“CLARKE!” Lexa snarls and Clarke shivers at the commanding tone that demands her to listen.
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Raven said that Octavia said that she saw you and Katie, on a date? And then she went in for a kiss” Clarke huffs, now folding her arms accusatory.
Lexa resists the urge to roll her eyes, although the urge was incredibly strong.
“It was NOT a date Clarke, Katie asked me to go to grounders so I said yes, I didn’t know she thought it was a date and yes she did go in for a kiss, but I didn’t kiss her, I said no”
“Oh”
“Yes oh, you shouldn’t go jumping to conclusions, look, can we at least sit down and talk? I’ve got a ringbinder digging into my ass”.
Clarke allows a tiny smirk to appear and nods, allowing Lexa to direct her to the edge of her bed.
They sit far too close together for comfort and Lexa begins.
“Clarke, please understand, what we did, I don’t usually do that sort of thing, hook-ups I mean. I was surprised when you made another pass at me, I didn’t think you would want anything more than what we shared that night. One night is uncomplicated, no strings attached, but if it strays from being just the one night and turning into more then things can begin to become complicated and I can’t- I don’t want that for us, things were already awkward enough beforehand”.
Lexa glances sideways, her eyes troubled and unsure.
And then a tentative hand reaches up and it’s caressing Lexa’s cheek and Lexa almost wants to lean into the touch, rub herself against the soft palm.
“Do you know what I did last night? I turned a boy away, I said no, he was there, he was willing and ready and I said no Lexa because YOU are the person I haven’t been able to keep off my mind ever since I found out how your lips feel against mine, I don’t think I could cope with never feeling that again”.
Clarke’s eyes have turned that soft in that moment that Lexa gulps.
A soft thumb leaves the warmth of Lexa’s cheek and journeys towards her bottom lip, mapping the soft flesh out and then dipping between and into a wet mouth.
Lexa bites down gently, “fuck Clarke”.
And with that Lexa is surprised to find that Clarke is now straddling her waist, in a split second it has progressed to this and where is Lexa’s resolve? When she needs it most it’s seemingly deserted her. Charmed under the spell of the girl who is now cupping Lexa’s face, gazing at her with such hunger and she’s leaning in and leaning in until hot breath fans against her chin.
“It’s just a kiss” Clarke whispers as she leans a tiniest amount more to capture Lexa’s bottom lip between hers before releasing with a soft pop.
Hands find Clarke’s waist and grip tightly.
“Just a kiss?” Lexa breathes, reaching to return the favour to Clarke’s bottom lip.
“Just a kiss” Clarke confirms before deepening it.
It’s hot, it’s hard, it’s full of desperation. All roaming hands and short sharp breaths as though neither of them have been alive at their truest form since their mouths parted the last time.
No script reading gets done that night, in fact both scripts end up on the floor.
Lexa ends up on her back with Clarke’s body fitting snug on top, the closeness being everything but not enough at the same time.
The hunger doesn’t let up and as Clarke’s hands slip underneath Lexa’s shirt to feel and scratch her gloriously hardened muscles of her abs she feels a familiar twitch against her inner thigh and a hardening that causes both of them to groan.
But then the sound of a loud car door startles them both into jolting upright and Lexa curses.
Anya’s home.
Clarke scrambles off a now embarrassingly hard Lexa and with a chaste kiss to the lips she’s out the door.
She wasn’t about to be caught in a compromising position by the subject of her desire’s older sister, ohhh no, not today.
As Lexa hears Clarke outside mumbling something to Anya about scripts and learning lines she flops onto her back trying to ignore the incessant pounding between her thighs.
“It’s just a kiss” they said. But who are they kidding? Neither of them will admit that they are in way over their heads but they are, massively.