Saturday morning
Casting one last look at the snowcapped Utah mountains, Therese readjusted her chair, trying to get more comfortable. She badly needed to sleep after the two virtually sleepless nights she had spent with Carol. She smiled. Although after those long hours filled with talking and making love her body felt bruised and tired, she was crazily, intensely happy.
After dinner at Abby’s country house Carol and Therese had returned to the Foothill, leaving Rindy to spend the weekend with her godmother. Only after she had promised for the fifth time that she would e-mail the photos Rindy had made, had Therese been able to disentangle herself from the girl’s tight embrace. She ruffled Rindy’s hair.
“Don’t worry, I’ll e-mail them as soon as I get home.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.”
Rindy looked at her inquisitively.
“Will you be back here soon?”
“I don’t know, sweetie.”
It was not easy to withstand those clear blue eyes that reminded Therese so much of Carol’s.
“Pleeeaassseee, Therese? ”
Therese shrugged and involuntarily searched Carol’s eyes. Carol smiled and nodded almost imperceptibly, making Therese’s heart skip a beat. Their brief exchange naturally remained not unnoticed to Abby.
“I’m sure she will.” she said dryly, taking Rindy’s hand. “And now I am sending your mother and Therese away, because I want to have my goddaughter all to myself.”
Driving back to the Aird estate, Therese and Carol had both been quiet, enjoying the intimacy of the Volvo’s rugged interior. Her hand on Carol’s thigh, Therese recalled their first drive together, only a week ago.
“You do realise that you didn’t make it very easy for me on my arrival here at Salt Lake City?”
Carol smiled, momentarily taking her hand from the wheel to squeeze Therese’s.
“I hated you for coming here to intrude in my life with your fancy camera.”
Therese chuckled.
“I felt utterly intimidated by your arrogance… “
“Therese, I’m sorry …"
“and terribly attracted…”, Therese added, making Carol blush vehemently.
Shifting gear to enable the Volvo to take the steep road leading up to the house, Carol was silent for a moment, then continued speaking.
“I must admit I was not kind to you. But soon I couldn’t help but notice how beautiful you are … and kind and generous …” She sighed.
“And after that, well, I was lost.”
They both laughed, enjoying and still astonished about this thrilling, new closeness between them.
_______________________________
“Madam, can I offer you breakfast?”
A flight attendant, carrying a small tray, disturbed Therese in her musings about Carol. Sitting upright, she took the tray, putting it on the little table in front of her. Although earlier she hadn’t felt hungry, she now eagerly devoured the stale cereals and buttered roll. Smiling inwardly, she realized that her night with Carol not only had made her crave for sleep, but for food as well. It had been worth every minute though, she decided, feeling how longingly her body reacted to only the thought of Carol.
After they had locked the Volvo in the underground garage, they had returned to the guest house. Although Carol’s room had never been the marital bedroom, they both didn’t want to go there. The guesthouse was their common ground and it was here where they wanted to spend their last night together.
Therese was to leave early on Saturday and Carol had helped her to gather her things and pack them in the small suitcase and rucksack. They stood close, working side by side, acutely aware of each other’s nearness, Therese intently inhaling the subtle fragrance of Carol’s perfume. Afterwards they had showered together and, dressed in identical white teddy robes, retreated to the bed. Therese adjusted the pillows so they could comfortably sit next to each other, leaning against the headboard while sipping from the last beers left in the small refrigerator. They both knew it was time to talk.
“If you had predicted this a week ago, I would have laughed at you, but right now I must confess: I don’t want to leave …”
Therese took Carol’s free hand and kissed it tentatively.
“Darling …” Carol savoured the word, delighted to use this new endearment.
After some deliberation Therese decided to be the one to name the issues awaiting them.
“Will I see you again?”
Her words betrayed her uncertainty. Carol turned to face her.
“What makes you question that?”
Therese shrugged.
“You talked with Harge today…”
“So did you,” Carol interjected.
Therese sighed, shifting her gaze to the ceiling.
“Maybe he has convinced you to stay with him.”
“Therese, look at me.”
Therese felt Carol’s hands touch her face, forcing her to look into those fierce blue eyes.
“Would I have asked you to come with me to bring Rindy to Abby today if Harge had convinced me? Would I be here now, if he had persuaded me to give up on you?”
She softly kissed Therese’s lips.
“I have made my decision. I want you, Therese.” She hesitated. “That is, … if you will have me.”
For the first time, Therese felt a great calm settle into her body. Before returning the kiss she whispered her answer to Carol’s thrilling but still somewhat unexpected question.
“Yes I will… gladly.”
The kiss turned into a long and tight embrace that left them both breathless. Later, lying close, their limbs entwined, they contemplated the consequences of their choices.
To Therese, Carol’s admission that she wanted to be with her came as a surprise. This entire week she had been mystified by Carol’s often erratic behaviour. Her talk with Abby had given her enough confidence to pursue Carol. And Carol had accepted her willingly. But was it enough to trust the woman who had now become her lover? Would Carol be able to resist the conventional safety of her life with Harge once Therese had left? There were so many things that tied her to Salt Lake City: her marriage, Rindy, Harge’s and her own professional ambitions. Did she have the courage to thwart Harge’s political career? And if she decided to leave Harge, would she be willing to out herself? To Therese, some things were unnegotiable. She would never leave New York. And she would not agree to just being Carol’s secret lover. If Carol chose for a life with her, it would have to be in all openness.
Therese handed her now empty tray to the attendant and settled back in her chair. She frowned. It had taken all her courage to tell Carol about her hesitations. After all, Carol was willing to take some life changing steps for her sake. How could she doubt her sincerity? But to her surprise Carol had been understanding, acknowledging that her behaviour could give way to doubts about her intentions. Brushing back Therese’s sleek hair with her hand to reveal the light skin of her brow, she considered Therese’s carefully phrased fears.
“ I have made my choice, but I also know that I still have to earn your trust. Please, tell me what you need.”
And then Therese had laid out the plan that had formed in her head after her talk with Harge. They were not to see or talk to each other for a month. It would give them both the time to sort out their feelings but most of all allow Carol the space to disentangle her life from the arrangement with Harge.
“What did you tell him, today?”
Therese remembered Harge’s taut face and hardly concealed loathing during their interview that afternoon.
“I told him that I’m in love with you…”
Carol softly touched Therese’s cheek.
“He was upset, at first, then angry.”
She sighed.
“And I understand that so well. But I have also made it absolutely clear that I want things to change and that I need his help in achieving that.”
Therese breathed deeply, admiring Carol’s courage to make Harge as responsible for what would be a major breach in their relationship.
“My God, you are something ….”
Carol smiled.
“And you better believe it!”
They were quiet for a while, still lying close. Then Therese returned to her suggestion to take some time before they would see each other again.
“A month from now I have an opening. I will show some of my photos in a small gallery in my neighbourhood. It’s nothing much, but I want you to be there.”
She turned her head, shyly seeking Carol’s crystal blue gaze that was now filled with tenderness. Not being together for an entire month would not be easy, but for now they both knew it was necessary. Carol’s slow smile was the answer Therese needed. She kissed Carol’s forehead, then made her way down, kissing her soft cheeks, her eager lips and eventually her warm breasts after she had parted the white, teddy robe. Carol gasped and moved her hips against her, craving for her touch. In one swift movement they both took off their robes and Therese eagerly moved her hand to find Carol ready for her, her wetness longingly enveloping her fingers. In their hunger for each other, they would not be gentle this time, knowing that this night would be their last one for a long time.