I'm not coming back.
“What do you mean you're not coming back?” Lexa couldn't believe what she heard. She was talking with the love of her life. Mother of their child. She was waiting for almost year for Clarke to come home. And now she was telling her she's not coming back?
“Lexa I'm sorry. You know that I want to come home. To you. To Aden. But there is situation that I can't ignore. I can't just leave them.” She was looking at Lexa in computer screen and hoping that her fiancée understand. She couldn't told Lexa the truth. She really wanted to come home to her family. She would give anything to be with them.
“So you're leaving us?” The brunette whispered. It supposed to be only one tour. One year. She knew how important that was for Clarke but they have a child now. They supposed to be married when Clarke come back. They had plans and now it's like everything disappear. “It's not just me anymore Clarke. We have a son. I know it is important to you but we are your family. I thought we are the most important thing in the world to you.”
“It's just another half a year. It's only six months Lex. After that I'm coming back. I promise.”
“A lot can change in six months. We're suppose to be getting married in three. You have your internship waiting for you in hospital. Aden is counting the days down for your come back. He was so happy that he can see you in two weeks. How am I suppose tell him that you are not coming?” She was looking in those blue eyes with plea that Clarke would change her decision. “We suppose to make that decision together. It's our life. Not only yours.” And in this moment the front door opened. Lexa could hear a cheerful voice of her son. “Tell him what you decided. He must to hear this from you.” The brunette said and turned to her son.
“Mom we saw a ducks. A lot of them.” He run to his mom. She picked him up and sat him on her laps.
“Look who called us.” Lexa said into his ear and she pointed her finger on laptop. Clarke's eyes teared up when she saw her four year old son. He was so happy and she was going to ruin his happiness.
“Mommy! I was in park with Auntie Raven. We fed ducks.” He smiled at her and waved to camera.
“Hi baby. Wow that's sound like so much fun.”
“When do you come home? I miss you so much.” He's been waiting for his mommy for so long. He was so excited when he heard that she's coming soon.
“I miss you too. And I miss your mom. But I can't come home now. I need to stay here a little bit longer.” She couldn't watch how her son's eyes started to watery and a single tear slowly run down his cheek.
“Why? Is that mean you don't love us anymore?” He didn't understand. Lexa tied her arms around his waist and hugged him. She kissed his head. She knew how much Aden missed her mommy. He cried almost every night for Clarke.
“Oh baby of course not. I love you so so much. I just can't come home yet.”
“But why?” Raven was in the kitchen. She didn't want to interrupt them. But she couldn't understand either why Clarke was not coming home. When she talked to the blonde last time she was so happy to return home after almost year away from her family.
“Because I… I… I need to help those people here. They're counting on me. I love you sweety and I promise I come back but not right now. You need to wait a little longer.” She couldn't stand watching how her son was sobbing in Lexa's arms. “Please baby don't cry.” Clarke felt awful. She did not want to lie to her family. Especially her son.
“They can find substitution for you. It has not to be you. Why you agree to this Clarke?” Lexa heard hesitation in Clarke's voice. She knew that is more story behind blonde's words.
“Because I have no choice Lexa. If I had I would have be right there with you guys. You are everything to me. I'm sorry but I have to go. I love you so much. I call you later. I love you Aden.”
“I love you mommy.” He said. He snuggled more into Lexa and watched how Clarke's face disappeared from the computer screen. Raven steped in the living room and sat right next to Lexa. She's been there for them since high school. She was like sister to them. They knew everything about each other.
“How long?” She asked. The shorter brunette knew that it wasn't easy for Lexa. She knew how much strength cost to rise Aden alone for almost a year. She needed to work to give Aden everything he want. That meant he needed to stay with someone else for most of the day. Lexa hadn't has a lot of days off. She helped in every way she could. Babysit Aden when Lexa asked her to. Drunk with her when she needed it. Comforted her when she had a worse day or fight with Clarke. They were best friend since she remembered. Always had each other back.
“Six months. And I can't get rid of a feeling that she keep something away from me. Like she doesn't tell me everything.” Lexa was always good with reading Clarke. She knew that something was not like supposed to be. She could see right through the blonde. She knew Clarke trusted her. But this time Lexa had a feeling like the blonde was lying to her. “Common Aden let's make dinner. I hope you stay for dinner as well.” She looked at Raven but the latter shake her head.
“Maybe next time. I have a date in...” Raven cheeked time on her watch. “hour and half. I should go and prepare myself.”
“And who is the lucky one?”
“Your sister.” Raven grinned at Lexa.
“What? I thought you two slept only one time.” The taller brunette was shocked. More than when she found out that Anya and Raven slept together after Clarke's birthday party last year. But she didn't know that they were dating.
“For your information it was more than just one time. Well look at me. Who could resist me? I'm awesome. Sorry but I have to go now. Bye Lexa. Bye little man.” She ruffled Aden hairs and she left from their house. Lexa and Aden went to the kitchen where they started to prepare dinner for themselves.
“Mom can I cook with you?” He looked at her with his best smile on his face.
“Of course baby.” She put his apron on his waist. He loved cooking with his mom. She even bought him his own little apron with his name on it. “What do you want for dinner?” She looked at him and immediately knew his answer.
“Mac n Cheese” It was his favorite dish just like Clarke's. She just smiled at him and nodded her head. They started making mac n cheese. Aden was very helpful and gave Lexa every product she needed. After dinner they sat on the couch watching some disney movies. Two hour later she felt weight on her laps. She looked down and saw his son who fast asleep during the movie. She gently lifted him up and carried to his room. She kissed his head goodnight and left little boy's bedroom.
She was so exhausted today. She didn't except to found out that the girl she was waiting for so long is not coming back. Not until the next six months. But she loved her. She couldn't gave up from her. Not after everything they've been through. After a long and hot bath she lie down in her bed. She turned on her side and looked at photo which were on her nightstand. Photo of her, Clarke and one year Aden. They were so happy. She remembered the day when that photo has been taken. It was their son's first birthday. They threw a birthday party for him and invited all of their friends and family. Octavia bought them a new camera and insisted that this is the perfect gift. From now on they could keep every memory on paper. And this picture it was the first one which has been taken by this camera. Lexa was thinking about how she survived another six months without Clarke by her side. Little did she know that the blonde might never come back.