Lost And Insecure!

Lost And Insecure!

Final Chapter

 
Graduation wasn't something Lexa really thought about but like most things she had only witnessed them in movies. You would all stand there in black gowns and silly hats waiting for someone to congratulate you and shake your hand while they handed over a rolled up piece of paper confirming your small accomplishment. Maybe that's why she never thought about it much, because she didn't think much of them in the first place. If anything based on the films she had seen, they looked boring, quiet and rather restricted for a celebration, with the build up of a hat being thrown in the air which always seemed anti climax if anything. Like everything else the Griffin family seemed adamant to prove her wrong making it impossible not to notice or hear the family as Clarke walked proudly on stage to take her certificate. They whistled, cheered and clapped like any family, only way louder, not that it embarrassed Clarke in the slightest. Instead she stood straighter turning to face her family with that beautiful smile before rolling her eyes, but what Lexa noticed most was how Clarke turned in search for her as she left the stage. It felt like she was waiting a life time for her name to be called when all she wanted to do was wrap her arms around her girlfriend and tell her how proud she was, how beautiful she looked and how much she loves her more than anything in the world. So as all of Clarke's friends names were called she joined in with their small claps of praise until finally her name was heard instantly making her smile because she would finally get to congratulate her girlfriend.

"Alexandria woods" The head of the school spoke Clearly. Before Lexa could even stand from her seat her whole family erupted in a earth shattering cheer and loud claps.

"Woah!!" Anya and Clarke cheered  while smirking devilishly clapping like they never would again. Lexa barely had time to turn to face her embarrassing family with pink cheeks and parted lips before her head teacher spoke once more.

"we would all also like to wish you a Happy birthday" Miss Linnell beamed before starting another round of applause while awaiting Lexa's presence on stage.

"Woah!!" Anya howled again along with her father.

Lexa could feel her face heating up with every step she took, bowing her head in embarrassment as everyone clapped around her while her rather loud family continued to roar over everyone else. She risked a glance in their direction and she wished more than anything she didn't as she caught devilish blue eyes smirking proudly before letting a loud whistle pass her lips for extra measure. It was one of those moments where you wished you could either bury yourself under a rock forever or wish everyone else dead in that very moment. Finally after what felt like far to many steps she climbed on to the stage, her cheeks burning with pinkness as Clarke, Abby, Jake and Anya only seemed to get louder.

"Congratulations, and Happy Birthday Alexandria" The head of the school praised shaking Lexa's hand firmly before handing over her certificate.

"Thank you" Lexa said just as quietly her smile growing wider as her family got even louder. She turned to face the camera wishing with everything she had that her pink cheeks would just vanish but when the flash went of and her wish never came she quickly made her way of stage to her beaming family. She hadn't noticed it before but now that her entire focus was on them Abby and Jake held a small happy birthday banner with the cheekiest of smiles, they totally embarrassed her on purpose.

"Well done kiddo" Jake quickly said not giving anyone else anytime to say or do anything before his bear like arms wrapped safely around her. "We are so proud of you!" he confessed pulling away to rest both his arms on her forearms.

"Dad leave her alone" Clarke grins pulling at her girlfriend to finally congratulate her herself. "Congratulations" she says softly already entwining their fingers to one.

"You too" Lexa says just as softly and suddenly they were in their own bubble again, just her and Clarke, blue eyes connected with green as they lose their self in gentle touches. There was much to say like all the things Lexa sat only moments ago aching to confess to Clarke, but words became lost as Clarke pulled her close with those soft blue eyes looking at her in such a way, a way that told her how proud she was, how much she loved her, and so lost like herself.

"Awh baby woods look at those pink cheeks" Anya smirked placing her arms around the two girls. "You know blushing is like walking around with a boner" Anya laughs scrunching up her nose adorably to Lexa to only make her blush more.

"will you get lost" Clarke shoves shaking her head while Anya can only laugh.

"Does this mean you two have brains now?" Anya questions teasingly. 

"That would imply you have one to, so defiantly not" Clarke says quickly with a smug grin.

"Touché" Anya dramatically clutches her chest while smiling and turning to Lexa with gentle eyes. See there is this thing about Anya it can take a while to get to know her and understand why she does things, but in reality when you're passed the sarcastic jokes she holds nothing but pure love for her family and Lexa was now one of them and judging by how Anya is looking at her she is proud of their accomplishment no matter how small it may be.

"Thank you" Lexa finally says earning a nod from Anya before disappearing to find her own girlfriend.

"So are you excited for your next surprise?" Clarke questioned eagerly pulling at Lexa's fingers as she struggles to stop beaming with excitement.

"There is more?" Lexa questioned furrowing her brows but unable to stop smiling as she remembered waking to the blonde. Clarke had managed to fill the bedroom with balloons and banners while she slept, and then to add to that she had brought her breakfast in bed with one of the biggest birthday cards she had ever seen, yet despite it all she couldn't help but love it all a little bit more just because of Clarke's excitement and enthusiasm no matter how many times Lexa had said she didn't care about birthdays and repeatedly told her she didn't need anything. But Clarke was Clarke, she never listens.

"Hmm well there are a few more" Clarke says nervously still playing with Lexa's hands while unable to take her eyes of Lexa for even a moment. "I'm a little nervous for the next one" Clarke admits biting her lip. "It's kind of from all of us" Clarke confesses "It couldn't have happened else"

"Should I be worried?" Lexa questioned her eyes watching Clarke curiously before falling amongst Anya, Jake, Abby and Gustus who were already watching them.

"Not at all" Clarke says confidently ignoring the butterflies in her own stomach as she leaned forward to capture her girlfriends lips. "We should get moving"

"I hate surprises" Lexa mutters between the soft kisses only to feel Clarke's lips growing in to a smile against her own.

"I know" Clarke grins. "You will love this one. Promise." She whispers pulling at Lexa's hand to start moving, and for some reason the way blue eyes twinkled with more excitement than she had all day, Lexa believed her so allowed herself to be pulled eagerly along by her insanely cute girlfriend.

--

She knew the Griffin family were a strange bunch, but when Clarke pulled her quickly and eagerly in to the Living room demanding her to stay there and not move while she disappeared herself she noticed all the family slowly pile in the room standing at a distance with smiles that seemed to be invincible today. She furrowed her brows more than once at Jake and Abby before turning to Anya for answers but Anya only smiled her wicked grin offering her no help at all.

"Ok. Now I'm worried" Lexa says shifting in her seat nervously not having a clue what was happening right now.

"Ok" Clarke says entering the room biting her lip nervously

"What's going on?" Lexa questioned with a nervous laugh before frowning more seriously, she hated all eyes on her or even being centre of attention so this whole thing made her fingers naturally play with the end of her blouse as Clarke breathed out a unsteady breath while nervously taking Lexa's hand in her own reassuring her with a smile.

"Like I said" Clarke starts "We all did this for you" Clarke says proudly looking to each and every one of her family members with so much gratitude and love that it almost looked like she could cry at any given moment. "Today is your 18th and we all wanted to make it as special as we could" Clarke explains squeezing Lexa's hand. "So before anything happens, I just want to say I love you Lex" Clarke says now more relaxed and confident. "We all do, and we just want you to be happy and be able to help in the process, because you are so special in ways you can't possibly imagine"

"Clarke.." Lexa says softly shifting closer on the couch having a million things to say right now but not really sure where to start but wanting Clarke as close as possible.

"Happy Birthday Lex" Clarke says softly placing a tender kiss on Lexa's lips before standing up to open the living room door.

Everyone watched on quietly as Lexa's confused frown slowly dropped from her face to shock, stunned, surprised to instantly teary. She didn't need to be introduced, she didn't need it pointed out, she would know that face anywhere. She raised her hands to cover her mouth in disbelief while her vision quickly became blurry.

"Hi lexie" his familiar yet unfamiliar voice came as he stepped further in the living room.

"Aden" Lexa said in disbelief as she stood up.  

"Happy Birthday" Aden beamed

Within seconds Lexa's arms wrapped tightly around Aden her normal brain functions long gone as millions of things ran through her mind from disbelief to how different yet familiar he still looked. She closed her watery eyes as her chin rest on his shoulder squeezing her fingers around his back as he did the same. She still couldn't believe it. She hadn't seen him in four years and the separation was so abrupt that they were even driven away in separate cars not giving them chance to say a proper good bye. It effected Lexa more than she would ever admit because she saw Aden as her baby brother that she needed to protect.

"You're so big" Lexa said through a almost sob while pulling away, her smile betraying her.

"Looks like you shrank" Aden says playfully making Lexa laugh.

She looked at him for a moment, actually looked at him.

He was fourteen now going through puberty and no doubt the hype of hot girls was a top priority. His once small cute dimples were more pronounced beside his small amount of facial hair that had grew through, his hair shorter and god was he a giant. She smiled at her own thoughts and how her small brother had slowly began changing in to a man and like moments before her eyes teared up unable to stop it.

"We should give them some privacy" Jake spoke shaking Lexa from her bubble. She forgot everyone was watching with all eyes on her she had became so shocked, so surprised she just forgot. Her eyes met her now family and all of them were beaming with love and then their was Clarke. Her Clarke. She was stood by the door she not long opened with watery eyes just like Lexa.

"How did this.. I mean?" Lexa stuttered turning to her family she loves so much. "How?" She finally left it at.

"Well it was Clarke really" Abby admitted looking over to her daughter as Lexa's eyes also followed. "She came and spoke to me one night and told me about Aden and how you were separated and the events that happened" Abby said softly "She made it a mission to find you and with great difficulty we were allowed a letter to be passed on to Aden's foster parents. Clarke wrote the letter and within two weeks we received a phone call" Abby admitted smiling proudly at her daughter and Lexa. "Come on, lets give them a moment alone" Abby says after a moment before everyone headed out the door.

"I'll be in the kitchen if you need me" Clarke said softly once she was standing infront of the brunette.

"I want you to stay" Lexa admitted taking Clarke's hand in her own, she wanted to share this with the girl that made it happen and just so happened to love with every fibre of her being. Clarke smiled lovingly at Lexa like she expected no less to leave her mouth but as Clarke snaked her hands around Lexa's waist pulling her close she already knew she wouldn't be staying.

"In a little while, you can introduce me" Clarke explains softly ignoring Lexa's frown. "I've met him briefly but I think you two should have this moment" Clarke says placing a tender kiss on Lexa's lips.

"I love you, Clarke" Lexa blurted more confident than she had ever confessed before "so much" Lexa breaths her eyes scanning blue like they had many times before.

"I know" Clarke hummed proudly wiping at the small tears falling down Lexa's cheek. "Save me some love for later" Clarke whispered pecking Lexa's lips once more before heading towards the door.

"Clarke" Lexa rushed before Clarke could completely disappear.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you" 

For a moment she stared at the closed door where Clarke once was, biting her lip with a smile that could light up a city. She expected Clarke not to listen to her when she said she didn't want anything for her birthday, she expected a present and morning kisses because that was Clarke, she expected to be treated like royally all day because Clarke never treated her any other way. Yet she never expected her to decorate the room while she slept before making breakfast in bed. She never expected her to have the head of the entire school announce the special occasion while her family stood proudly at the back cheering and whistling with banners just to embarrass her because they just simply love her. Yet she went above and beyond with Aden and her heart felt like it grew in size in mere seconds and all she could think about was dragging Clarke back in this room to share another piece of her life with her future.

"Girlfriend huh?" Aden teased with a smirk "Since when did you get game?" 

"Shut up" she whined turning around to slap his arm but her smile remained exactly where it was. "I can't believe you're here" Lexa said after a moment. She really couldn't, a part of her was still in shock while the other half felt a emptiness quickly filling that she wasn't even aware she had.

"I know, its surreal" his grin feeling familiar again.

"Tell me everything" Lexa said after a moment pulling him to sit comfortably on the couch.

"I don't even no where to start" he confessed looking around the living room. "I got placed in another foster home about six months after.." he paused looking down to the ground before awkwardly looking back up to Lexa not wanting to repeat their abusers name. "So yeah, I got fostered and I've been there ever since" he smiled. "They are such great people Lex, they adopted me properly last year" he admitted.

"Really?" Lexa couldn't help but smile proudly just as Aden was doing. For years now she had worried where he was, what he was doing, if he was ok but no matter how much she hoped he got everything he wanted she still couldn't shake that dreadful feeling that maybe he didn't. "What are they like?" she questioned curiously remembering a man behind Aden that followed him in.

"They are so funny" he laughs shaking his head "Mom is very organised and very bossy, where as dad is  more if you don't tell mom I won't" he grinned "we're kind of a team. I mean, what about you?" he questions more eagerly. "This house is huge!" he confesses eyeing the front room and extra large flat screen TV. "and you have a girlfriend now" he says like its the biggest shock of all. 

She looked at him for a moment and just laughed, despite their years apart his personality hadn't changed. His fear was long gone and he was free to do as he pleased but as Aden the boy deep down, he was still the same, his eyes just as soft and eager to know everything.

"The Griffins" Lexa says with a smile already forming "They fostered me a little  over eight months ago" She says turning to look at the pictures on the walls. "They are everything a family should be" she said after a moment of silence. No words could explain the eight months she had been here, how could you possibly explain something that was life changing while being one of the best things to ever happen to you? "They are crazy" Lexa laughed "but I love them" Lexa confessed innocently.

"They seem great" Aden acknowledged. "Anya she is freaking awesome"

"She is" Lexa laughed. "You met her already?"

"Yeah, she picked Dad and I up from the train station and kept us hidden till you left this morning" he grinned. 

"Why is she awesome then?"

"I got in the car introduced myself" he laughed "and she was like don't care, we're not friends right now, we are enemy's got it?" he replayed trying to act like a angry Anya. "I had to wake up extra early for this, so please. Please. Be still" he laughed "loved her instantly" Aden admitted nodding his head. "That and on the highway there was this tiny spider climbing along the dashboard, she literally braked pulled over and jumped out screaming, literally it didn't even touch her" he laughed. 

"Yeah, apparently they are all scared of spiders in this house" Lexa smirked remembering the spider in Clarke's bed.

"So Clarke?" Aden asked not discreetly at all. "How did that happen?"

"Smooth" Lexa laughed. "I don't know" she admitted shaking her head shyly. "It just kind of happened" she shrugged.

"Nothing just kind of happens. I mean she's super hot"

"She is" Lexa agreed with a warning glare that Aden only laughed too. "We just kissed one day and I don't know" she stuttered.

"You cant even pull a few words together when talking about her. What's the matter did you break in the last few seconds?" he teased.

"You know i'm kind of wishing you didn't come now"

"Yeah. Yeah. Come on details, you're not getting out of it"

"Fine" she huffed twitching her lip to the side. "I just fell in love with her" she said just as shy "It was easy and natural. I didn't know it was happening until it was to late" Lexa admitted fiddling with the hem of her jeans. "Have you met Clarke?" Lexa couldn't help but ask.

"Briefly" he admitted. "I read the letter she wrote to my parents, and I spoke to her on the phone briefly about details, but she brought us back together" he said softly reaching out for Lexa's hands. "She seems pretty incredible to me" he admitted. "Especially since she has you smiling like that"

"She really is" Lexa barely spoke already lost in blue eyes and peachy lips. "She's special"

---

"Lexa" Clarke argued while being pushed backwards in to their bedroom "He is only here for a few more hours" Clarke argued but was quickly silenced with Lexa's lips on hers. It was soft yet dominant all at once and Clarke found herself beginning to laugh as her legs hit the bed while she tumbled back. "Eager" Clarke whispered just in time for Lexa's lips to catch hers once more.

"Shut up and kiss me" Lexa ordered between kisses, her fingers already seeking Clarke's skin as she pushes under Clarke's top to rest on her hip. Clarke shut up instantly, it was a thing that happened when Lexa was in control, it would always send jolts of pleasure through Clarke's body and down to her core till she was nothing but putty in Lexa's hands. "I love you" Lexa whispered biting down on Clarke's bottom lip just before Clarke's tounge could plead for entrance. "You're beautiful" She whispered her fingers already climbing pale skin till she could feel Clarke's bra straps beneath her finger tips. She was soft and gentle unable to take her eyes of the blonde who held her so tenderly. "Thank you" Lexa repeated resting her forehead on Clarke's who kept her eyes closed, still lost in the kiss and commanding tone Lexa had moments ago. 

"You have nothing to thank me for" Clarke finally whispered opening her eyes to stare in to green. "Besides there are more surprises to come" Clarke confessed. "Aden was kind of something we all worked together with to make happen, where as I have my own things yet to give you"

"Clarke I told you.."

"I know, I know" Clarke grinned pressing her palm tenderly to Lexa's cheek before pushing It in to her wild mane. "I wanted to" she whispered pushing up to press another kiss to Lexa's lips. "I like spoiling you, and a birthday seems as good excuse as ever. So just let me do this"

They just stared lovingly at one another for a moment allowing their hearts to flutter against their chest, gentle touches and loving looks were all that was needed to make the other smile with the occasion touch of each others lips. It was a moment they got lost in and once again nothing mattered.

"You know I fall for you every day?" Clarke questioned gliding her finger tips up Lexa's jaw bone across her hair line and down her nose. "I think I would be lost without you" she admitted finally bringing both her arms around Lexa's neck to bring them closer despite Lexa already laying above her. "and as much as I love it just being me and you, Aden is only here for a little while longer" Clarke grinned unable to deny loving the way Lexa brought Aden in the kitchen before excusing herself and Clarke to pull her upstairs just to kiss her and confess her love. She was such a cutie sometimes.

"I know" Lexa said softly. "I just wanted a moment with you" Lexa admitted. 

"I know, and I love that you do" she whispered pecking Lexa's lips once more "Save me some of that love for later" Clarke repeated her earlier comment.

"Always" 

----


"Broke it here, here and here" Aden explained pointing to his left arm while feeling out his bone through the skin. "Never been on a skateboard since" he admitted turning to the three girls sitting opposite him.

"Screamed like a girl" Aden's dad added with a smirk.

"No I didn't" he denied staring his dad down.

"Did too" his dad teased causing the girls to laugh. Lexa couldn't help but watch their relationship fondly and extremely grateful that for all these years Aden had someone to love and care for him. She found herself squeezing Clarkes hand as she played with her fingers turning just enough to see Clarke smiling.

"Didn't. He makes things up" Aden explained pointing to his old man like he was crazy. "anyway where was I? arhh that's it got to the hospital and this nurse was totally hitting on me" he explained proudly while buffing out his body rather proud of himself.

"She gave you a sticker and a lolly for being brave" Aden's dad added with a chuckle while eyeing his son. "and he tells me I make things up" Derrick laughs now pointing to his son like he was infact the crazy one. The girls all laughed in union while Aden could only glare at his dad. 

"I'm putting you in a care home when you're  older" he says seriously. "Anyway, what about you? any broken bones?"

"no" Lexa says simply shaking her head with nothing interesting to say causing Clarke to face her for a moment watching her silently.

"That's not entirely true" Clarke say softly encouraging Lexa to tell the story.

"She was in a car accident" Anya says for her making Clarke roll her eyes.

"A Car accident?" Aden questioned more confused eyeing Lexa carefully for any obvious injuries.

"Yeah. Nothing major" Lexa confirms.

"That's also a lie" Clarke smiles softly at her girlfriend before turning to Aden. "If she won't tell you I will" Clarke says proudly. "it was a few months ago now, but Lexa and my dad were involved in a car accident. My dad severed a main artery at the top of his thigh which could have killed him. Lexa however took control of the situation, made sure he didn't move or remove anything that had pierced through his leg because she could see the blood already flowing out heavily. She was the one who kept him awake and called the ambulance all while having a concussion and a 2 inch piece of glass piercing her stomach" Clarke says turning to face the woman she loves. "She will deny all of this of course" She smirks squeezing Lexa's hand.

"True story" Jake says proudly as he enters the room.

"So You're like a superhero" Aden says proudly. "Can I see your scar?" he questioned causing Clarke to turn her attention back to him, Lexa hated her scar and was always a little self-conscious of it no matter how much Clarke showered it with attention.

"urh- "Lexa hesitated turning her attention to Clarke and Anya for a moment before back to Aden's excited face. "Ok" she says nervously before beginning to raise her top enough to see the 2 inch scar across her stomach.

"Wow" Aden says amazed. "That's awesome"

"I think so too" Clarke says honestly reaching out her finger tips to trace the tiny scar for reassurance. "Beautiful" Clarke confessed catching green eyes with her own feeling her chest tighten with pride.

"Here you go" Anya says handing Aden a bag.

"What's this?" he questioned confused.

"A sick bag, you need it being around these two" she gags causing Aden to laugh.

----

"Trust me" Clarke laughed guiding Lexa in to the vehicle carefully. "Mind your head"

"Do I really need to be blindfolded?" Lexa questioned through another smile.

"Yes" Clarke say shutting the door before jumping in the opposite side seconds later.

"Where are we going?" Lexa questioned seeing nothing but darkness.

"Really? what would be the point in the blindfold if I just told you?" Clarke questioned grinning at her dorky girlfriend.

"Oh yeah" Lexa grinned feeling the ache in her jaw that seemed to have remained there all day. "Fine" she huffed playfully reaching her hand out for Clarke to take which she did pressing a kiss to her knuckles.

"Just relax" Clarke instructs. "It won't take long"

"ok"

As the engine started and Clarke started to drive Lexa still was unable to stop the smile aching her jaw. It wasn't because anything was particularly happening right now, but from the events that had happened through out the whole day. She hadn't been able to take a moment to think about the little things, like the faces of her family as she was greeted with yet another surprise, sure that her heart would combust any moment. There were no words in the English dictionary to describe how Lexa felt but for once in her entire life she was sure this is exactly what it feels like to have a family that love and care for you, who are willing to do anything just to see you happy. She thought everything about her life was edging in to the darkness and that's where it would forever remain, in the shadows of everyone else as days passed and time ticked but somehow the Griffins changed that. They simply just turned on the light.

"We're here" Clarke says excitedly before stepping out the car.

"Clarke" Lexa says a little more alarmed until her door opens.

"Relax" Clarke laughs "I won't leave you" she explains guiding Lexa out the car carefully. "Ok stay there" Clarke instructs while Lexa obeys, not like she has a choice.

"What's that?" Lexa questions hearing Clicking noises and a bunch of other noises she cant make out. "What are you doing?" Lexa questions again after no reply. "Clarke?"

"I'm here" Clarke says a little out of breath "Just putting things back in place" Clarke admits taking Lexa's hand in her own to guide her further down the path. "So this is from me entirely" Clarke confesses. "I know how much you love the stars" She whispers removing the blind until Lexa could see once more.

"What's this?" Lexa questioned softly eyeing the Volkswagen van with the doors wide open from behind. It was a open spaced van with comforters plastered all around the floor with fairy lights decorating the roof from the inside. It looked beautiful. "Clarke" Lexa says turning to the smiling blonde a little overwhelmed for the hundredth time.

"I know its different" Clarke says softly looking in to the comfy decorated van "Look" Clarke says pulling Lexa inside with her to nestle in the blankets and pillows together. "It's a open roof to so you can see the stars from inside" She says lovingly. "I wanted it just to be me and you" she admits placing her hand on Lexa's cheek.

"I love it" Lexa blurted out already leaning forward to rest her forehead on Clarkes.

"Yeah?" Clarke says unsure.

"It's beautiful" Lexa admits unable to not take another look at the dim fairy lights around them. "You're beautiful" Lexa whispered leaning painfully close to Clarke's lips. The way Clarke's fingers curled in Lexa's hair keeping her teasingly close. "I love you" Lexa confesses her hand coming around Clarke's neck feeling the unsteady breaths leaving one another lips.

"I love you" Clarke echoes her eyes all but struggling to keep focused on green eyes with Lexa's lips so close. "Did you save a little love for me?" Clarke whispers with shaky breaths as Lexa inches even closer her eyes already fixated on Clarke's lips.

"Always" Lexa hums her eyes falling shut as she finally connects their lips. No matter how many times she kisses Clarke no experience will ever explain how it truly feels. It was like everything became brighter, lighter and much more exciting as time froze just for the two of them. A moment of pure bliss while her stomach dropped and her fingers tingled every time as if this was nothing more than a dream. Clarke's soft cute moans always brought her back though and Lexa could all but smile while kissing her more eagerly earning her a nip to her bottom lip.

"What are you smiling about?" Clarke whispered before capturing Lexa's lips cheekily once more.

"You" Lexa mumbled between kisses before pulling away to rest her forehead against Clarke's. "Always you" She confessed her eyes drifting to Clarke's smile, the one where she looked her most cutest as she bit her bottom lip to supress it. Then everything faded away as everything was Clarke and Lexa. As their lips connected once more their bodies moulded together as Lexa pulled Clarke down on top of her. It was inevitable. The way they kissed and held one another as they stripped each other carefully of their clothes, the way the moans echoed the woods with every thrust, stroke and kiss. The way they whispered I love you as they inhaled one another's sweet scent while rolling around the blankets getting more tangled together while committing every inch of skin to memory over and over again.

--

God she was beautiful. Clarke was finding it impossible to tear her eyes away as Lexa smiled shyly completely exhausted while hiding her face behind her hand.

"Don't do that" Clarke ordered smiling as she entangling her hand with Lexa's stopping her from blocking Lexa's after sex look. "How did I get so lucky huh?" she questions crawling over Lexa till she was hovering above her.

"I look a mess" Lexa stated with the widest of grins as Clarke began trailing kisses along her collar bone lovingly.

"Sex hair, sweaty and with a smile that says you just got it so good. I wouldn't call that a mess" Clarke says smugly nipping on tanned skin which had Lexa rolling her eyes playfully. "What do you think it says?" Clarke teases finally lifting her gaze to meet Lexa's while trailing her hand down her neck across her breast and to her hip.

"Hm. if you keep that up we might have to go again" Lexa moaned her eyes already closed from Clarke's finger tips.

"I wouldn't say no to that" Clarke smirked nipping Lexa's bottom lip teasingly. "but you look almost unconscious from exhaustion and that would mean you won't get to read the letter I wrote you" Clarke grinned moving her body carefully beside Lexa's not wasting anytime pulling her close.

"A letter?" Lexa questioned brows furrowing

"A letter." Clarke repeats turning and ruffling things around until she turns back around with the letter in hand. "I wasn't sure what to get you, so I thought about the present you gave me on Christmas. When you read your journal and gave me a insight of how you felt, so I thought I could do the same" Clarke grinned handing over the closed envelope as Lexa sat ur right clutching the fur blanket across her chest.

"You're full of surprises today" Lexa said nervously taking the letter and reading 'To the woman who drives me crazy'

"It's not as well written as yours so go easy on me" Clarke admitted while remaining laid down to trace Lexa's bare back. "Read it out"

"Ok" Lexa said while already removing the piece of paper from its envelope. "Lexa.."

Lexa..

Let me just start this of with saying Happy Birthday beautiful. This is your final gift from me to you I promise. I know how much you hate
surprises but hopefully after today you kind of love mine ;) 
You allowed me to read a piece of your heart once, to see your vulnerability and show me that everything I felt wasn't just one sided, it was by far one of 
the greatest gifts I ever received therefore I write you a piece of my own. 
I would love to say it was love at first sight I really would but what kind of love story would that be huh?
Honestly when I first met you I thought you were so weird and quiet. That sounds mean doesn't it?
Well I suppose it was, I judged you before you had chance to show me who you were,
I judged you because I was being childish about sharing a room and I was for some reason not myself. Yet in some weird way, I think it makes our 
story even greater, because judging you didn't defy who you were, it defied me.
I remember thinking that when I came home from school after your first day, your eyes were bruised and your nose busted.
I remember taking one look at you and instantly feeling the urge to protect, if that meant killing murphy then so be it, I think that was one of the first signs
even if I didn't really know it myself. Other than thinking you were insanely beautiful from the moment I saw you of course.

wow this is kind of surreal how many things are rushing to me right now, I'm not even sure what to write next but anyway. 

Your panic attack at school for me was another clue which regrettably I was to slow to realise. Thinking about it now is ridiculous, but when I first
saw you in the hallway with Costia you were holding her hand and I just remember looking at it for a moment wondering why the hell were you doing that!? 
I think apart of me was slightly jealous, it was the reason I followed you in to the bathroom instead of her, and I'm so glad I did. 
You were all panicky and just undeniably cute and beautiful, you clung on to every word I spoke and I got to see those beautiful green eyes, and my god were they beautiful.
I don't know if you realised it but I lost myself for a moment just looking at you.

Ok with this one I was slightly sly and cheeky but I'm not even ashamed to say it, but remember when we watched our first movie on my bed? 
Yeah, well about that you could have totally watched it from your own bed completely fine, I just wanted you close. I know, I know I'm creepy, but
totally don't regret a thing, I spent majority of that movie watching you jump before i embarrassingly fell asleep. 
If I remember correctly ,if we wasn't so rudely interrupted by my mother who I still curse to this day for this we would have kissed.
Well judging by your journal anyway you thought so to.
I'm glad we didn't though because I've never really told you about my reaction to our first kiss as you ran of so quickly but all will be revealed in good time.

I remember having my first insanely jealous moment with you, which you were annoyingly oblivious to. It was Costia's party,
you were dressed in those sexy leather pants with your stomach on view and I instantly became a pervert, watching every step you took while eyeing you head to toe.
God just thinking about it, you have no idea how beautiful you truly are Lex. 
I avoided you that night for as long as I could, mainly because I really couldn't stop thinking about you, and it scared me so much that
despite avoiding you my eyes kept finding you, I was unable to focus on conversations and I really, really wanted to rip Costia's hair from her skull if she 
touched you one more time. I was convinced you were dating, but then we had our dance and I though ok maybe your not. Then everything became so messy,
I really didn't want to stop dancing with you, infact you made my skin heat up within seconds and I went a little fuzzy and I didn't even care that I had a
boyfriend. Everything was just you, you, you. That night was the first time where I honestly thought, holy shit. 
It was the real reason I disappeared to the bathroom when you played seven minutes in heaven, god I'm so glad you didn't kiss properly btw!

From that night I knew there was something there, and I started questioning my sexuality. I stopped thinking about Fin and as horrible as it sounds I kind of forgot about him.
Instead I thought about your lips, your eyes, what you felt like against me, how it would feel to kiss you, there was just so many things that
scared the shit out of me because I had never felt like I wanted to be that close with anyone, or even felt dizzy at the thought. It was strange and scary but god was it so addictive and I hadn't even had a taste yet.

This for me is the moment you had me completely and I knew it the second I followed you upstairs. Our first kiss. 
You don't know this because you rudely ran away ;) But  I didn't come after you because I regret it. When we kissed Lexa I felt everything in my body go weak,
and I'm not just saying that, it started in my chest and it felt so heavy but incredible, like I couldn't breathe or something. I just remember your lips on mine, and everything went
so fuzzy like a out of body experience because I couldn't even think anymore. God its so hard to explain and this probably makes no sense at all.
But I didn't put my hand on your chest because I wanted to stop kissing you, I did that because I felt my body collapsing in to you, it was to stabilise me because
I didn't quite believe it was happening. I had never felt anything like it, you left me shocked and speechless and I just couldn't move. But I want you to know even if you know it now that I Wanted you so much more, its why I followed you home.

I could go on and on, but by this stage I was falling in love with you. How could I not? 
I Think when we went camping proved that when Roan's greasy hands was trying to get all over you. I could have killed him. I was so in love with you that trip that I didn't even know it, I was just drinking and drinking because we had made out so much shared a bed every night to sharing different parts of the tent with other people and Costia was just
still as obvious as ever with Roan now also trying to get in your pants, then we hadn't confirmed we were anything...urgh it was stressful times.
I will embarrassingly admit though that when you followed me down to the lake and we finally agreed we were dating and then we kisses and kissed.. I kind of got back to the tent laid on the ground and had a killer happy dance. I was absolutely buzzing.

You make me a huge dork. But Lexa woods, I swear to you now.
I have never been more in love in my life.
Now give me a kiss, I've been waiting this whole time.

xx

"this whole time" Lexa finished her smile now wide as she traced the kisses at the end of the page. It was a letter that made her heart warm in a way Clarke only could and despite only just finishing it she already wanted to reread it and live in the memory once more, like Clarke said  herself their memories made it special, how it went from not wanting to know one another to unable to be apart. Putting the letter to one side Clarke sat up with a smile to her lips.

"You ok?" Clarke questioned placing a kiss to Lexa's nose already knowing she was perfectly fine.

"Yes" Lexa admitted her eyes finally looking up to look in to blue. "Come" Lexa encouraged guiding one of Clarke's thighs over her lap until Clarke was straddling her. As Lexa rest her forehead against Clarke's her girlfriend snaked her arms around her neck. "I love you" Lexa confessed in a whisper and she meant it whole heartedly. "You were that jealous of Costia?" Lexa questioned her happiness unable to hide itself as it appeared widely on her lips.

"You have no idea" Clarke laughed still tracing every inch of beauty infront of her. "I won in the end" Clarke smirked proudly gripping Lexa that little bit tighter.

"There was never any competition" Lexa admitted her finger tips sliding down Clarkes jaw while her eyes were unable to stop drifting to those screaming lips. One of the things she loved about Clarke was how she had slowly learnt her facial expressions, the different between her soft eyes and hard eyes, how when she knew she was thinking and completely lost in her own mind, but the ultimate best was recognising the way Clarke only looked at her exactly how she was right now. Her eyes blue and soft with a smile that was barely their with the smallest of tilt in each corner. It was the look of pure happiness while losing herself at the exact same time.

"Do I get that kiss?" Clarke questioned her voice more huskier than only moments ago. "Or are you going to keep me waiting?"

Lexa barely had time to laugh at Clarke's cheekiness before she pressed her lips to her girlfriends unable to hide that it was all she had been wanting to do from the moment she finished the letter. The kiss was slow but sensual as Clarke's naked body pressed tighter against Lexa's while Lexa's fingers curled around the back of Clarke's neck, like she was begging desperately for more to settle the burning fire in her lower stomach, she ignored her heavy breaths for air as Clarke's fingers dug deeper in to her mane gripping it just the way she liked it. Only moments ago she was ready to settle down and fall asleep, ready to allow her body to give in to its exhausted state Clarke had pushed her to but from one kiss, her fingers tingled, her body burned and the flame within was alight once more.

"Baby" Clarke moaned parting the kiss as Lexa's fingers trailed down Clarke's body to her wet centre. "You're tired" Clarke tried to reason but failing as her eyes fell shut as Lexa's tounge circled repeatedly over Clarke's pulse point before leaving her mark.

"I want you" Lexa hummed gripping Clarke's hip to stay exactly where she was with her thighs spread either side of Lexa. "Please" she whispered biting down on Clarke's bottom lip with heavy eyes and unsteady breaths.

"I'm yours" Clarke whispers capturing Lexa's lips once more in a needy kiss that sends shivers down Lexa's spine until she starts circling Clarke's clit teasingly. She didn't need to built Clarke up, their was no reason for teasing or foreplay but Lexa loved this part most, the way her fingers teased Clarke's clit until she was almost begging for more with every thrust closer to Lexa for more, the way her head tilts back as she sucks on her nipple, the way Clarke's body creates its own rhythm against Lexa despite not being inside her. Nothing could explain the way Clarke became before sex, especially when Lexa was in control.

"Ready?" Lexa questioned softly kissing Clarke's lips once more still struggling to take her eyes of Clarke's desperate state.

"Yeah" Clarke moans already feeling the tip of Lexa's fingers pass her entrance. Lexa watches her fingers disappear inside the woman she loves, her mouth drying up instantly as Clarke seems to sink them in deeper as she lets her weight come down.

"Fuck" Lexa hums licking her lips before gripping Clarke's hair tighter with her other hand and smashing their lips together while beginning to withdraw her fingers back out to thrust them back inside.

"Lex" Clarke whimpers both hands coming to tangle in Lexa's hair with more grip than before as her eyes fall shut and her mouth drops open. Lexa's not sure what's more sexy right now, the way Clarke's face crumbles apart or the way Clarke's body seems to be matching Lexa's rhythm as she rises and falls harder on Lexa's fingers. "God" she breathes her head falling forward to rest on Lexa's as Lexa thrust faster and harder. Lexa tries, she really tries to take all it in, the way her eyes clamp up till her forehead crinkles up from such intensity, the way Clarke cant seem to let her body separate from Lexa's for even a fraction as even their breaths are mingling together.

"I'm yours" Lexa says softly curling her fingers at the exact moment, knowing exactly how much Clarke loves it when she speaks.

"Mine" Clarke moans before letting out another desperate moan biting on her bottom lip to supress it.

"Don't do that" Lexa orders taking Clarke's bottom lip in her own instead with a naughty nipple. "I Want to hear you" She confessed trailing kisses down Clarke's neck before thrusting in and curling her fingers once more.

"oh god" Clarke moans her hands not sure where to grip any more as her body becomes more desperate for her release, she sinks her body harder and faster in to Lexa's hand creating her own rhythm that only turned Lexa on with a adoring smile.

"You're so close" Lexa says nibbling on Clarke's ear. "I can feel it"

As Lexa curled her fingers once more, like Lexa predicted Clarke came hard, her mouth wide, eyes clamped shut and earth shattering moans filled the silent night skies. She kissed and nipped along Clarke's body helping to coax her down from her high before slowly removing her fingers.

"I Love you like that" Lexa grinned feeling Clarke's body become floppy against her own until she laughed at Lexa's words.

"I love it when you do that to me" Clarke grinned planting a sloppy kiss to Lexa's lips before pushing her back down to the cushions. "where did that come from?" she grinned rolling to her side to lay beside Lexa.

"It was the letter" Lexa smirked.

"You are totally getting more from now on" Clarke smirked pulling Lexa in to her side.

Clarke wasn't sure how much time had passed, how long they had been looking in to the night skies where the mystery of the stars lay, while tracing absentminded patterns on one another. It was a beautiful night, not that they had paid much attention like she had intended but she couldn't help but love the turn of events even more. Every day and every night she seemed to fall in love harder with the girl in her arms, and instead of fearing their future together she felt excited for their next chapter. She didn't care that they would part ways in less than six weeks because she knew that Lexa loves her. 

"Lex"

"Hm" Lexa hummed already letting her eyes close while letting her hand drop heavily in Clarke's hair to hold. The stars were not nearly as beautiful as Lexa, so Clarke struggled to tare her eyes away as her heart fluttered in her chest with the widest of grins. The intensity of it was endearing. 

"I love you" Clarke whispered kissing her shoulder as Lexa let out a puff of air

"Luv you" Lexa muttered to exhausted to speak while already half asleep. Clarke's heart melted a little more as her smile grew still tracing patterns along Lexa's bare arm.

"Did you enjoy your birthday?" Clarke whispered nuzzling her nose against her shoulder.

"Hmm" she hummed getting no more as she buried further in to Clarke making Clarke giggle.

"Lex" Clarke whispered patiently waiting on a response, when one didn't come she raised her hand to trace Lexa's jaw before placing a tender kiss to the corner. "You don't know this yet but one day, I'm going to marry you" Clarke admitted more sure of anything in her life as she rest her head back on the pillow feeling Lexa's body snuggle even closer.
It will always be Clarke and Lexa.

---

"What did you do this time?" Anya asked with a smirk after watching Raven and Clarke disappear to the ladies.

"How did you know I did something wrong?" Lexa questioned while bashfully staring at her girlfriends arse.

"Please she's giving you the eyes. The annoyed ones" Anya grins placing her elbows on the table. "So what did you do?"

"Agree to this double date" Lexa admitted. "Worst idea  I've ever had apparently" Lexa adds turning to a laughing Anya who sat at the opposite side of the table.

"Separate beds for you tonight then?" Anya questioned brow raised playfully.

"We never sleep separate" Lexa says furrowing her brows at the thought. "She just wanted to spend out last night relaxing at home instead of going out" Lexa says diverting her attention on stage. It was a young blonde girl singing nervously to the audience. "Where are we by the way?"

"Oh here, just a old open mic place people come to try and get noticed" Anya says shrugging her shoulders. "You just go up, say your name and if there's a slot you go up there" Anya says looking at the blonde on stage aswel. She seemed good, but extremely nervous which unfortunately showed through her voice. "It's a lovely place. Nothing like karaoke. You sit and eat, get candles on your table and people just listen. Real good here" Anya says taking a swig from her straw. "anyway back to Clarke, do what I do"

"Do I want to know what you do?"

"It works.When you go home tonight tighten all your jar lids, that way she will have to speak to you" Anya says like its genius. "I've done it to Raven"

"You fell out already?" Lexa questioned with a laugh. "Haven't you just started?"

"Apparently I do a lot of things wrong"

"so you tighten her jar lids?"

"Correct" Anya says proudly while Lexa could all but stare at her with amusement.

"and that really works?"

"Sure does, someone has to open it right"

"I think ill be ok on my own" Lexa says while hiding her smile behind her glass.

"What are you smiling about?" Clarke questions taking a seat.

"oh nothing" Lexa says taking a swig of her drink while eyeing her girlfriends amazing figure in her cute red dress.

"Eyes up here" Clarke says playfully with warning eyes "You ain't getting none tonight" she whispered with a smirk. Of course this only made Lexa smile wider and breathe a breath of relief at Clarke's playful tone instead of serious.

"Heard you're in a mood" Anya says turning to look at Clarke as she slinks her arm around the back of the chair.

"Anyone ever told you, you're really nosey" Raven questioned placing her hand on Anya's thigh.

"Everyday. I Don't get this intelligent for nothing" Anya quips. "What's up with moody Margaret now?"

"I'm not a moody Margaret" Clarke says defensively.

"Really? I feel like that expression it already tattooed to your face, that's how moody you are"

"You bring it out in me"

"It was there before I even got here actually" Anya says smugly. "I have make up with me if you wish to cover that" Anya says pointing wearily to Clarke's face a little dramatic.

"Oh really, well that's lucky I have a fist with me if you want me to punch that" Clarke snaps holding her hand up with her own amusement.

"Are they like this every time there together" Raven questioned looking to the two Griffins having a snarling match.

"Since I've met them" Lexa says still half amused at how they managed to keep it up every time. "you get use to it" Lexa says casually while watching her girlfriend wind her middle finger up like she had caught a big one. "eventually" Lexa admits not sure if you could ever get use to someone changing so quickly and dramatically. Clarke was always mature responsible and occasionally childish to have some fun, but when ever Anya was around everything went out the window and its like you was watching two brothers and sisters annoying one another as long as their parents allowed them too. Lexa loved watching it more than she was willing to admit, mainly because half the time Clarke lost which pissed her of on a whole other level.

"BA! BA!  SHUSH!  I like this one" Anya interrupts what ever Clarke was mid arguing to listen to a new girl walking on stage.

"See this is why I didn't want to come" Clarke huffs slinking back in her chair. "She winds me up all the time"

"You do it back" Lexa laughs.

"don't side with her" Clarke huffs crossing her arms "You defiantly ain't getting none"

"Heard you ain't that good anyway" Anya chips in shooting her last arrow with a shit eating smile.

"Hell I'm going home" Clarke huffs standing to her feet quickly.

"No" Lexa says softly taking Clarke's hand in her own. "Please don't" She says already fiddling with Clarke's fingers. She knew Clarke didn't want to come because Anya would do nothing but annoy and embarrass her, she knew she wanted nothing more than to stay at home cuddled up in bed ready for their early morning flight tomorrow, but Lexa found herself stuck in a corner when Anya had asked for a double date so excitedly because all she really wanted to do was say goodbye before they went of travelling. "Can we just sit down" Lexa says softly already guiding Clarke to sit back down and calm down. "She's only messing. You do it all the time"

"You have a lot of making up to do" Clarke softens leaning closer to kiss her girlfriends lips. "ignore me, I'm just a little tired today" Clarke admits squeezing Lexa's hand.

"anything I can do to make it better?" Lexa questioned green eyes scanning blue.

"You could always sing" Clarke says cheekily with a smile before pecking Lexa's lips. "You know how much I love that voice"

"I can't.. no.. I can't" Lexa stutters looking up nervously to the stage. 

"Relax" Clarke say softly. "I'm kidding. I would never want you to feel uncomfortable, its just unfortunate is all" Clarke admits kissing Lexa's lips once more. 


After that they had a nice night Clarke and Anya got back to talking like adults, while Raven and Lexa got to know each other a little more. It was what a double date should be with laughter and jokes to just listening to unique voices echoing through the speakers as they ate. Anya was right, this place was nice and fancy and the candles on the table that lit the rooms seemed to be setting the atmosphere perfect.

"I've not heard this song before" Clarke says turning to face her table before turning back to a young man playing the piano.

"I think its original" Raven adds.

"They can do that?" Clarke questions "Sing there own songs"

"Yeah, best way to be noticed I suppose" Anya shrugs squinting her eyes on the lad on stage. "He's good"

"Really good" Lexa adds. His voice had a light husk which complimented his song.

"Do you write your own?" Anya asks out the blue turning to Lexa.

"Me?" she questions wide eyed.

"No the chair" Anya says rolling her eyes. "Yes you, who else"

"Oh. No. I mean yes" Lexa correct "Sometimes"

"Why don't you have a go?" Anya questions. "Up there" 

"I cant" Lexa says snaking her head nervously her eyes darting to Clarke for help. "I get stage fright"

"I get that" Anya says softly "but when's the last time you tried?" 

"along time ago" Lexa admits still shaking her head. She couldn't do that.

"You sing to Clarke fine" Anya say softly trying to be understanding but not understanding it at all. 

"She knows my voice" Lexa says with no other answer "She makes me feel like I can"

"Leave her alone Anya" Clarke says softly taking Lexa's hand "You don't have to do anything"

"I'm just saying, Clarke's here. She would love to hear you sing, and Raven and I" Anya says turning her focus back to the singer before looking back. "No one here is saying you can't." she smiles softly taking a gulp of her drink before joining in with the cheers of praise for the young musician. 

Everyone stood to clap such talent while Lexa barely put her hands together as Anya's words slowly sank it. She hated to say it but Anya was right on some weird level, everyone here was either here to sing or listen to singers with no judgement, it was just a calm relaxed nice meant to be enjoyed. For as long as she could remember she hadn't sang infront of anyone since Clarke, and even now she wasn't sure why she choose to do that, maybe it was because she already caught her once, she didn't know. Even then she knew she trusted the blonde to not knock her down like she had been her whole life, maybe that was the reason she sang so openly when ever Clarke requested. Until now.
She looked dauntingly at the stage, it seemed small with only a few instruments here and there, empty and ready for possibly the next biggest thing. Yet Clarke had asked as playfully as it was she knew her voice always made Clarke smile in away nothing else could.
"I'm just going toilet" Lexa said abruptly leaving the table before anyone could say anything.

"Anya" Clarke snapped.

"What?" Anya shrugged "I didn't do anything this time it was just advice"

"Well don't" Clarke breathed "if she never wants to sing around anyone, then she doesn't have to"

"I understand that" Anya admits. "I just want her to feel less afraid, she's not alone anymore Clarke. That's her real fear, not the actual singing, because if she thought that she wouldn't sing to you"

"Anya has a point" Raven says softly twitching her lip. "makes sense to be scared of everyone judging you when its all you have had"

"I know" Clarke says sadly. God she would do anything to remove Lexa's self doubt that's been planted by every worthless person. "I just don't want any pressure for her to do anything from any of us"

"won't say another word" Anya says apologetically.

"Thank you. Do you think i should check on her?"

"No, she will be fine. Stop worrying"

"So are you nervous about starting college?" Anya questioned.

"Not really. Excited more than anything"

"What about you and Lexa? aren't you worried"

"No" Clarke smiles. "She's it for me"

"but is she it for you?" Raven questions

"I think so" Clarke says confidently. "it's completely different to anything ive ever felt before."

"I'm Proud of you" Anya says after a moment "Even if i don't say it very often"

"Thanks Anya" Clarke smiles her eyes drifting down before up again.

"Cheers" Anya says holding her glass up for Clarke to clink as Clarke reaches her glass across the table Anya jolts out of her seat with wide eyes whacking Clarke's arm repeatedly. "OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD"

"Anya!" Clarke snaps looking down to the spilt drink on her top "Stop hitting me" she snaps

"Clarke!" Anya all but yells eyes still wide while unable to move other than to keep hitting Clarke.

"What?" Clarke says confused

"Lexa" Raven finishes pointing to the stage.

"What?" Clarke says confused turning to face that direction anyway only to freeze completely.

"Oh my god" Clarke breathes feeling her lungs ready to combust as she watches Lexa sit at a piano with her eyes closed. "Oh my god" she repeats not sure what else to say. She couldn't tare her eyes away, she didn't even want to blink scared she will miss the slightest movement.

"Whats she doing?" Raven questioned

"Is she going to sing?" Anya questioned much like Clarke unable to look away.

"She looks so nervous" Raven added.

'When you try your best but you don't succeed
when you get what you want but not what you need
when you feel so tired but you cant sleep
stuck in reverse
And the tears come streaming down your face,
when you lose something you cant replace.
when you love someone but it goes to waste.
Could it be worse?'

"Oh my god" Anya breathes her eyes still wide as her smile grows. "She plays piano. Why haven't you told me that?"

"I didn't know" Clarke breathes her eyes watering as her heart tightens with so much intensity she feels ready to melt, burst or combust from how much pride she felt in this very moment. Goose bumps covered her body and in someway she hoped and willed her Lexa to open her eyes so she could show her exactly how she felt, that there was no need to be nervous. Lexa never opened her eyes though and Clarke's pride only kept going as she played the piano with more ease than a guitar. It was the silence in the entire room that sent shivers down her spine, how everyone watched on with smiles and she knew everyone was as equally amazed as her.

"Are you recording this?" Anya questioned turning to Raven.

"Hell yeah" Raven said like it was obvious. But Clarke was still lost. Lost in whatever Lexa was doing to her, her heart swelling and her tears trickling down her cheek but her smile forever growing.

"this is a original" Anya adds proudly.

"guys" Clarke said through a grin. "Shut up" She pleaded softly not wanting to miss a single word or key Lexa had to offer in her moment of bravery.

Lights will guide you home.
And ignite your bones,
and i will try to fix you.
high above or down below
when you're to in love to let it go,
but if you never try you'll never know
just what you're worth.
Lights will guide you home

The room was deathly silent, other than the sound of Lexa playing the piano as she picked up the tempo. Her fingers mover move smoothly over the keys than Clarke had ever seen her do with her guitar. She didn't even know she could play the piano. As Lexa hit the keys more aggressively and passionately Clarke took the moment to look around, to look at everyone still and silent exactly like her and her heart grew once more. How could a beautiful big voice come from someone who was always so quiet and shy.

'Tears stream down your face,
when you lose something you can not replace.
tears stream down your face and i..i...
tears stream down your face
i promise  you i will learn from my mistakes,
tears stream down your face and i..i...
lights will guide you home.
and ignite your bones
and i will try to fix you.

As Lexa brought the song to a end, the room feel completely silent until everyone stood from their seat with a loud round of applauce and whistles of approval. Clarke watched on, she watched her girlfriend return to the woman she fell in love with as her fingers immediately started fiddling with themselves while her cheeks blushed pink ducking her head in embarrassment. God if she could move she would dive on stage and wrap her arms around her and kiss every inch, but that's the problem isn't it? Clarke still was frozen to the stop despite her tears and her forever growing smile, she couldn't move. She just watched Lexa have her moment of praise, of congratulation as tears seemed to be falling down her cheek more quickly than the last.

"Hi" Lexa says softly furrowing her brows as she approaches the blonde before a shy smile appeared once more.

"Lex" Clarke tried but words were lost, god they were so lost. She needed to say something anything but all she managed to do was look in to green eyes and blushing cheeks. Without a second thought her lips crashed urgently in to Lexas. Like clock work her body kicked in and her arms were wrapped around Lexa's neck drawing her closer in second.  "You play piano" Clarke blurted out between kisses not sure if she believes it herself yet but not ready to part lips. Only when Lexa shyly laughed through their kiss did their lips part.

"That was amazing" Clarke breathed after a moment of staring at her girlfriend lovingly.

"You liked it?" Lexa questioned wiping a tear falling from Clarke's cheek. Clarke wanted to laugh, she really did. Liked it wasn't the word she would use, but she didn't think she needed to tell Lexa that, she knew exactly what she thought by the tears that had shed.

"God i love you" Clarke breathed resting her forehead on Lexa's closing her eyes. "i love you so, so much" she whispered.

"I love you two" Lexa hummed breathing Clarke in. "it made you smile" Lexa acknowledged which made Clarke laugh anyway.

"It did" Clarke grinned "Please can we go home, so you can sing that song to me again" Clarke pleaded already gripping Lexa's collar just to keep Lexa close.

"Yeah" Lexa whispered with a wide smile.


They woke up late the following morning and almost missed their flights to rushed to check their phones and to excited to care. Three whole weeks with just one another sounded a little like heaven to both of them and so they turned their phones of the moment they reached the airport, missing the hundreds of texts from Anya about the millions of views Lexa had got from her open mic night recording that Raven had uploaded without permission.

The End.