Chapter 14
When Olivia saw him striding down the courthouse hallway, briefcase in one hand and coffee in the other, her first impulse was to look for somewhere she could duck into to so they wouldn’t have to talk but it was too late. It was clear they had both seem each other and either walking away would have been painfully obvious. After the party a couple of weeks ago that seemed too harsh. She couldn’t help but notice how good he looked. He was wearing of her favourite three-piece blue suits and a tie that she had actually bought him when they were together.
Benson managed a small smile as they came face to face. “Off to court?” She asked hoping the tone sounded friendly.
“Just left an arraignment.” He replied casually. “You?”
“Waiting for the jury to come back.” She replied and an awkward silence fell between them.
“Do you want to grab lunch?” The words came out before Barba could stop and think about their implications or repercussions. He missed Olivia and not just as his girlfriend but as his friend. He missed talking with her over lunch or grabbing a quick coffee together in the morning before work. He missed seeing and talking to her every day.
“Oh,” Olivia was clearly taken aback.
“Sorry, I shouldn’t have –“
“Yes,” Olivia smiled. “That sounds nice.”
They sat at the sushi place down the road that he had introduced her to years ago before they were even dating. Being a cop Benson knew of many take-out places that were reasonably good, affordable and fast but Barba introduced her to other restaurants. He loved food and loved to show her different places that she had admittedly walked past many times but never went inside. He showed her everything from upscale sit-down dinner places to a food truck that made unbelievably good burritos. As they sat there she realized that it had been several months since they sat down together and the thought made her have to choke back tears. “How’s homicide going?”
“It’s good.” He replied. “It’s not the same as SVU though. I’ve actually been talking to the Brooklyn DA and might transfer back to work SVU there.” Olivia felt her stomach tighten with guilt as they both remembered the reason he left SVU in the first place. Luckily, the waiter brought over the first round of sushi and tempura they ordered.
“How’s Noah?” Barba finally asked. There was no denying that while he missed Olivia he also missed that boy. It hadn’t been exactly easy but overtime they had bonded. He felt guilty for leaving the child’s life so abruptly.
“He’s good.” Olivia replied with the smile that always crossed her lips when she spoke about her son. “Preschool is going well.”
“That’s great Liv.” Barba replied warmly. The two ate in silence for several minutes. Olivia kept catching herself looking at the man a little too closely. He looked tired. He looked more tired that he normally did. There were dark circles under his eyes and his jaw line was covered in stubble.
“How are you?” The words finally slipped out of Olivia’s mouth.
“I’m fine.” He replied casually.
“No, really. Are you okay?”
“Honestly …” He sighed. “Not really. My Mother is … sick. She insists that it is nothing serious but they made her take time off work. She hasn’t taken time off from work my entire life which makes me think it’s a lot more serious than she has been telling me. It’s been over a month now and … I’m really worried.”
“Raf,” Olivia instinctively reached out for his hand and he didn’t pull away. “I’m so sorry. Is there anything I can do?”
“Sitting here with you … this is great.” Their eyes locked and both had to stop themselves from leaning across the small table and kissing. “I’ve missed you.” He practically whispered.
“I’ve missed you too.”