Fragments

Colet shook her head, as if trying to wake herself up from crying like a child. She lifted her gaze from her slump, staring at the meager memories lined up on the cabinet.

“Tangina, tama ka na nga, Colet. Inom, tara, inom,” she almost forced herself to say.

Without another thought, she grabbed the jacket she had been wearing earlier and left her unit; the walls of which held nothing but sadness and guilt.

Exactly two years after everything ended between her and Maloi, Colet found herself drinking away the pain that still kept her from moving on, from accepting the life she now had.

Colet never drank—only occasionally with friends or when an event warranted it. But no, she never liked alcohol. She avoided it as much as she could, never understanding why people willingly put it in their bodies. It was gross, unhealthy, and made you do things you would regret in the end.

It was never part of how she coped, never something she turned to in order to wash away her problems. In the two years since being pushed out of the family she helped build, she had never resorted to drinking just to forget or to pass the time.

But tonight—this very night—the pain was too much to bear.

And so, for the first time, she surrendered to it.

Whatever the hell alcohol could do to help her survive just this night.

Because she never drank, it didn’t take much for her to get drunk. Ilang shot pa lang, wala na, lasing na agad si Colet. At least, it gave her what she needed; a moment to forget how to think straight, how to feel deeply.

Kasabay ng pagkahilo ay ang kahit papaanong paggaan ng bigat.

For once, she felt like she was finally floating after two years of feeling like she was drowning in nothing but sadness.

Pero kahit anong gawin n’ya, her mind kept going back to Maloi and the twins; to the life she lost, to the regrets that followed.

Each time her mind betrayed her, she downed another shot of tequila, desperate for rescue.

It was almost 3 AM when Mikha arrived at one of the bars she owned after receiving a call for help from its manager.

“Boss Mikhs, sorry. Nagulat rin kami na nandito siya. Akala namin kaya n'ya mag-inom. We had to call you kasi ayaw ibigay ‘yong phone n'ya, tapos ang kulit na.”

“Okay lang, Sid. Buti you called at ‘di n’yo na pinaalis.”

“‘Di talaga, ma’am. Maoy na maoy na. ‘Di na rin ‘yan makakalayo, baka sa labas lang ng bar tumumba bestfriend mo.”

Mikha chuckled at that. Sid, the manager of one of her bars, knew all her best friends and always reported to her whenever one of them was in the area. She liked it that way, keeping an eye on her three best friends who never learned how to handle their liquor.

Especially Colet, who never drank.

Which was why Mikha drove there immediately in the middle of the night; because, again, Colet never drank.

And that worried Mikha. It made her wonder what the hell had pushed her lightweight best friend to surrender to the mercy of tequila.

“Di na siguro kinaya...” she muttered under her breath as she walked toward Colet, who was already slumped over the bar, obviously passed out.

Reaching her, Mikha noticed the phone clutched in Colet’s hand, its screen blinking.

Uyab calling…

“Putangina, contact name ‘yan. ‘Di pa rin pala binabago.”

She didn’t catch the call right away. Instead, she glanced at the notifications.

Uyab
17 missed calls

Uyab
10 unread messages

Curiosity mixed with mischief pushed Mikha to open the messages.

A flood of worried texts from Maloi filled the screen—asking where Colet was, if she was drunk, what the hell she was saying.

Backreading to see what might have triggered the panic and the missed calls, Mikha let out an amused laugh at what she found.

“Pota, bai. Kailan ka pa natutong mag-drunk message? Jusko, good luck sa’yo pag nahimasmasan ka.”

At that moment, the phone vibrated again.

Uyab calling…

Mikha answered.

“Hi, Loi. Mikha ‘to.”

“Mikha? Ha? Wait lang, anong nangyayari? Nasa’n si Colet? Kanina pa ba kayo magkasama? Lasing ba ‘yan? Nasa’n kayo? Lasing ka rin ba?”

“Chill, Maloi. Kumalma ka.”

Silence. Then Maloi took a deep breath, trying to calm herself.

“Okay, okay. Sorry.”

Mikha couldn’t help but smile. Despite everything that had happened, Maloi still cared.

“And nope, I’m not drunk. But Colet definitely is,” she said. “Tinawagan ako ni Sid. Naligaw raw rito si Cols, nag-inom. ‘Di nila alam gagawin kasi lasing na lasing, so they had to call me. Kakarating ko lang, actually.”

Seconds of silence passed before Maloi spoke again. It was only then that Mikha remembered the date.

Two years since they broke up.

“Uh... okay. Ang dami n’ya kasing text kanina tapos walang reply. I’m wor... ano…”

“No need to say anything to me, Loi. I’ll take care of Cols. It’s already 3 AM, pahinga ka na. How are the twins?”

“They’re okay, Mikhs. Tulog na kanina pa. Miss na nila si Althea. Excited for their playdate ulit.”

Mikha could hear Maloi decompress as she said this.

“Yeah, I was telling Aiah ang daming ebas ng anak namin about their playdate. As an ate raw ni Coco and Letlet, she has to be the one to plan what they’ll do once they visit again.”

Maloi let out a small laugh.

Mikha knew the drill. She always steered the conversation toward the twins—always used Althea, their 6-year-old daughter, whenever Maloi started to worry about Colet.

It was something she often thought about.

Why did she have to ease Maloi’s feelings when it was Maloi who ended things? When it was Maloi who pushed Colet away?

It never made sense to Mikha.

In her eyes, Colet got the shorter end of the bargain.

No matter how many ways she looked at the situation, she always arrived at the same conclusion—dehado si Colet sa lahat ng nangyari.

Maloi’s reply broke Mikha’s thoughts.

“Very Aiah naman do’n si Ate Althea.”

“Yeah, I don’t even know if may nakuha ba sa’kin si Althea. Sige na, Loi, I’ll take care of Cols. Ako na bahala rito.”

“Uh… okay. Thank you, Mikhs, ha. Paano, uhm, kapag okay na… uhm, ano…”

“Oo, Loi. Gets ko. I’ll let you know kapag nahatid ko na siya sa condo n’ya. Text kita.”

“Okay… thank you, Mikhs. Tell Ate Aiah, pasensya na.”

“No need, alam mo naman ‘yon. She always understands these things,” Mikha assured Maloi.

Oh, if only she could see how Aiah understood the situation between Maloi and Colet—because she just didn’t.

“Thank you. Ingat, drive safely. Bye.”

“Bye.”

Mikha then looked at the now-stirring Colet.

“Bai, di ko gets si Maloi talaga. Pero isa lang alam ko—mahal ka pa. Sure na sure,” she whispered.

It’s a normal Monday morning for Maloi. Even though she lost hours of sleep last night because of you-know-who, her perfect routine wakes her up at exactly 7 AM. She always starts her day by checking up on the twins, cooking breakfast, going back to them to prepare them for the day, and then scheduling the rest of her tasks depending on what the day requires.

Such time flexibility and freedom are possible because of Maloi’s career as an established freelance painter and business owner. She co-owns a thriving clothing line with one of her best friends, Stacey. She manages to juggle work and being a mom to the twins during the weekdays—Colet has them on weekends, which she spends resting and having fun.

“Mommy, I don’t like eggs po,” says Coco as the three of them have breakfast.

“Para ikaw si Mama. You both hate eggs,” Letlet says, pointing out that Colet shares the same dislike for eggs as Coco does.

Once again, the twins never fail to remind her of that one person she’s been trying so hard to leave behind and move on from. Pero wala naman kasi siyang choice, ‘di ba? Never na niyang mabubura si Colet sa buhay niya bilang anak niya rin ang kambal.

Speaking of being reminded, Nicoloi is rapidly becoming Colet’s mini version. He looks exactly like Colet, likes the same things she does, shows a similar personality and antics, and even exhibits flaws that Maloi knows very well Colet has—stubbornness, impatience, and anger issues.

On the other hand, Marcolette is becoming Maloi’s extension. She takes after her in many ways—physically, mentally, and, to Maloi’s frustration, emotionally. She can see herself in her daughter.

Parang naghati lang talaga sila ni Colet sa dalawa. Equally distributed ang atake. Pero mahal niya pareho nang patas.

“It’s good for you, Coco. Just try, please?”

“No, Mommy. Please…” her son replies, pouting.

Pakshet, ang cute ng anak ko. Parang si ano talaga… bwisit.

“Papa-cute pa. ‘Di ka cute, Coco. ‘Wag mo pansinin, Mommy,” Letlet says, while Maloi couldn’t stop herself from laughing. Kuhang-kuha ni Mallet ‘yong ganitong ugali ni Maloi.

“Oh no, Letlet. Cute naman si Coco, don’t say that.”

“Away n’yo ako ulit,” Coco says, looking like he’s about to cry.

“Oh, oh, joke lang. Joke nga lang, eh. ‘Wag ka iyak, Coco,” Letlet tries to save the situation—or more like herself.

“Say sorry, Let. You said something that hurt your brother. And when we do that, what do we say?” Maloi gently tells her daughter.

“I’m sorry, Coco. I was just joking. Bati na tayo? ‘Wag ka na iyak,” Letlet says.

“Okay, bati na tayo.” Coco meekly replies, always quick to accept his sister’s apologies. Another thing Coco apparently takes after Colet—mabilis lang din tanggapin ni Colet kapag nagsosorry si Maloi.

“Okay, good. Now, finish your breakfast. Lolo and Lola will be here any time now. They’re spending the week here, remember? Gusto nila kayo maka-bonding.”

Both twins excitedly clapped at this. They’re both close to Maloi’s parents, as these are the only grandparents they have. Colet has been estranged from her own for years and has no contact with them. The twins have never even met them.

Since her parents were visiting and staying with them for the week, Maloi decided to go grocery shopping to make sure they had enough supplies at home. She left the four of them as she went ahead with her day.

She had just arrived at the supermarket’s parking lot when she received a call from someone she least expected to hear from.

Annie Jimenez calling…

Shutting off her car, she tapped her phone to answer the call, already confused as to why another person who should have stayed in her past was reaching out now.

"Hello?"

"Ayun! Omg, pasensya na, ate Maloi. Wala na lang talaga akong ibang matawagan. And for the first time in history lang 'to nangyari, kaya I am lost as a lost and found," Annie said jokingly, though anxiety was evident in her voice.

Maloi wanted to laugh but stopped herself. It was surprising how much she had missed Annie's antics.

Annie was Colet’s longtime secretary at the law firm where Colet was a partner. Aside from that, she was— for lack of a better term— Colet’s charity case. Colet had met Annie through a program that allowed sponsors to fund someone’s vocational secretarial course. It was supposed to be anonymous, but Annie, with her big heart and immense gratitude toward her sponsor, managed to trace the young lawyer and offered to work for her.

Since then, Annie had become Colet’s secretary. Because of that, she and Maloi grew somewhat close, to the point where Annie even started calling her “ate.” After all, ‘di naman nalalayo ang edad ni Annie sa kanila.

But since Maloi and Colet broke up, she rarely hears from Annie at all.

"Anong meron, Annie?"

"Uh, sorry. Kasi, ate Maloi, ikaw pa rin 'yung listed emergency contact ni boss Colet dito sa work."

Emergency contact? Ako pa rin?

Annie continued, "Kung susundin ko ang tamang proseso, ikaw ang dapat unang tawagan. Pero I tried muna ‘yong hindi ako masosoplak ni boss C— tinawagan ko sila ate Mikha at Aiah, pati si ate Jho at Gwen— pero walang nasagot. So, you know, back to the correct process tayo— tawagan ang nasa emergency contact."

"Di kita gets, Annie," Maloi replied.

"Hindi pumasok si boss Colet, ate. FOR THE FIRST TIME IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD. Hindi siya sumasagot sa mga tawag ko, wala ring seen sa messages. Kaya hindi ko alam ang gagawin kasi, as I said, FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER. At narealize ko lang now na wala kaming napag-usapan na protocol kapag bigla siyang naglaho, kasi nga, NEVER NAMAN SIYA NAGLALAHO SA WORK." Annie almost shouted on the other line.

Maloi remained silent, confused and unsure how to process this—especially since she was still listed as Colet’s emergency contact, even after two years of separation. She remembered the text message Mikha sent her that morning, saying she had managed to bring Colet safely back to her unit.

"Ate? Huy? Hello? Sorry, alam kong break na kayo, pero ‘di ko na talaga alam ang gagawin, kaya napatawag na ‘ko sa’yo. Nag-aalala na rin ako. ‘Di ko pa magawang puntahan sa unit niya kasi wala akong access do’n. Though, last resort ko na ‘yon, ate. Pasama na lang siguro ako sa security kapag walang sumagot sa katok ko. Wait, oo nga noh. Sorry, boplaks ko kapag taranta. Puntahan ko na lang, ate. Pasensya na sa istorbo," Annie hastily said, the worry in her voice growing, probably realizing she should never have called Maloi in the first place.

Typical Annie—always talking a mile a minute.

"No, wait lang, Annie. It’s okay that you called me," Maloi replied. "I'll go. I have a key to her unit. Binigyan n’ya ko in case of emergency, for when the twins are with her.”

"Hala, ate, sure ka? Baka mag-relapse ka? Pogi pa naman ni boss lalo ngayon."

"Tigilan mo ‘ko, Annie." Maloi sighed. Loko rin talaga 'tong taong 'to.

"Joke lang, ate. Sorry. Sobrang nag-aalala lang ako kasi nga, never naman nawala si boss sa trabaho. Sure ka talaga, pupuntahan mo?"

"Oo, nasa labas rin ako ngayon at malapit lang sa condo niya. Puntahan ko, tapos balitaan kita."

"Thank you, ate Maloi. And jokes aside, pasensya ka na. I just really don’t know what to do, and I’m really worried now."

"Okay lang. Tawagan na lang kita agad, ha? Bye na."

Maloi ended the call, started her car again, and drove off to Colet’s condo.

As she stopped right in front of Colet’s door, all the worried thoughts she had battled with while driving here came rushing back in one overwhelming wave.

Sobrang lasing ba? Tulog pa rin? Baka nasuka na 'to tapos na-choke sa sariling suka? Baka nilalagnat na? Bakit ba kasi nag-inom? Bakit ba 'ko natataranta? Bakit ba 'ko nag-aalala? Colet naman, tangina.

Maloi knew Colet never drank. And when she did, especially too much, she always ended up sick, often with a high fever.

She shook these thoughts away, but the worry still wrapped around her entire body as she pushed open the door to Colet’s unit.

Silence and darkness. That was what greeted her the moment she stepped inside. Lifeless. As if no one actually lived here.

It suddenly hit her—this was the first time she had ever set foot inside Colet’s unit. She had always been outside, either dropping off or picking up the twins, or waiting in the lobby. But she had never gone in before. She never wanted to.

She switched on the lights and took in the space. It was fine, fully furnished, but it felt... empty. Like sadness was woven into the walls.

She immediately thought, this place only comes alive when Coco and Letlet are here.

Instinctively, she went to the kitchen, which was right by the entrance, and checked the cupboards and the fridge.

She was right. No food, except for the kids’ supplies. She recognized them instantly. But food for Colet? Nothing. Maybe the bottled water, sure kay Colet ‘yon. But other than that, Colet only keeps food for the weekends when the kids are with her.

Maloi didn’t know how to process this. But deep down, she already understood why things were like this.

Remembering why she came, anxiety rushed through her veins again—Si Colet, nandito ba siya?

There was only one room in the unit, and she knew the kids slept with Colet when they were here. She went straight to the only closed door and pushed it open.

Darkness greeted her again. She fumbled for the light switch and there she was. Colet, lying in bed.

Maloi quickly walked over, her heart hammering in her chest.

Relief flooded her when she saw Colet’s chest rising and falling. Okay, she’s alive.

Maloi pulled out her phone and dialed Annie’s number.

“Ate Maloi? Hello?”

“Annie, nandito siya sa unit niya. Tulog lang. Okay naman siya. Humihinga pa.”

She heard Annie let out a sigh of relief. “Shuta, akala ko kung ano na. Thank you, ate. Ako na bahala rito sa work. Pupuntahan ko na lang mamaya in case may kailangan siya. Pasensya na ulit, ate Maloi. Thank you talaga.”

“Okay lang, Annie. Don’t worry. Bye.”

Maloi ended the call without waiting for a response. She was about to leave when she noticed how pale Colet looked.

Without thinking, her hand reached for Colet’s forehead. Mainit. Just as she suspected. Whenever Colet drank too much, she always ended up with a fever.

She also realized that Colet had managed to shower after Mikha took her home. Another thing about Colet—she was borderline obsessive about cleanliness. And Maloi knew that probably worsened her fever.

Without a second thought, her body moved on its own. Taking care of Colet was instinctive. The thought of leaving vanished completely.

“Ano bang problema mo, Colet?!” Maloi shouted at her ex-wife.

 “Ano bang paki mo?! Bakit ka ba nandito?!” Colet shot back.

 “Ako nga ‘yong tinawagan ni Annie kasi hindi ka nila ma-contact! Bakit ka ba nag-inom?!”

 “Again, ano namang paki mo kung bakit ako nag-inom? As if you care, Maloi!”

 “I care! Magulang ka ng mga anak ko. Lahat ng ginagawa mo, apektado sila!”

 “Eh, tangina naman, bakit mo ‘ko hiniwalayan kung apektado pala mga anak natin?!”

That shut Maloi up.

And just like that, Colet was brought back to two years ago—right when their relationship was falling apart.

Walang nagbago. At mukhang wala na talagang magbabago.

You want to know why Mikha never understood why they had to break up? Why she could never fathom why they couldn’t fix the issues that eventually led Maloi to push Colet out of their home?

Maloi said it’s because Colet was intensely workaholic. And that Colet cheated on her with someone else while she was at it.

Colet admits to being a workaholic but denies the accusation of cheating.

Mikha witnessed how Colet tried—desperately, almost begging—for Maloi to listen.

But she also saw how Maloi fully closed her mind, her heart, and their doors to Colet the moment she got the tip that Colet had been unfaithful.

Mikha knows how Maloi can be self-centered and selfish at times. Mikha also knows how Colet values her integrity and ego at times.

She was there when everything unfolded. A silent witness to a love story brutally murdered by heightened emotions.

Mikha POV

Maloi shouting profanities at Colet.

Colet screaming back, insisting she never did what she was being accused of.

Three-year-olds Coco and Letlet, safely tucked away inside the room, sleeping soundly in Aiah’s arms.

Maloi throwing all of Colet’s belongings out.

Colet trying to walk toward Maloi.

Maloi shoving her away with full force, making her stumble to the ground.

Colet kneeling, begging Maloi to listen.

Maloi crying hysterically, spitting accusations at the person she once called the love of her life.

Colet, in tears, slowly breaking down, defeat and hopelessness written all over her.

Mikha just stood there, frozen. Unable to move. Unable to do anything.

Then, Colet stood up.

Maloi looked at her in disgust.

Colet’s anger flared.

She screamed at Maloi, calling her cruel. Selfish.

Consumed by rage, she stormed out of the house.

Mikha heard Aiah step out of the twins' room.

“Go after her,” Aiah said.

So Mikha did. She ran—after her best friend, after the person she wholeheartedly believed could never cheat on Maloi.

And she still believes it now.

She caught up to Colet.

Drained of what little strength she had left, Colet collapsed to her knees once more.

Mikha caught her just in time.

And Colet—broken, exhausted—sobbed into Mikha’s arms, begging her to save her from the pain.