Not What I Seem

Lena pushed Kara onto her desk. Her lips pressed into Kara’s, the need behind each kiss sending a throb down Kara’s legs. Her hands knotted into fists, fingers tightly grasping Kara’s shirt, pulling the hero hard against her. Teeth bit at Kara’s lower lip and the hero groaned, feeling the way Lena’s mouth curved into a smile at the noise. There was a tongue in Kara’s mouth, warm and teasing and tempting and Kara shuddered, her hands moving up under Lena’s skirt, fingers gripping the CEO’s thighs tightly as she slipped her grip slowly upwards.

“Fuck” Lena moaned, low and throaty, as she straddled Kara. She draped an arm over Kara’s shoulder, arching into her as she nipped Kara’s neck, teeth grazing her pulse.

Kara moved her other hand up, fingers trembling as she popped buttons, yanking Lena’s blouse until it ripped and she could glide her hand underneath Lena’s bra. Feeling the way the other woman’s skin was soft and hard and warm beneath her touch.

Lena gasped into Kara’s neck, her breath ragged, “Please, Kara.” Her head tilted back and Kara swiped her tongue from Lena’s collarbone to her ear, the CEO’s skin salty under her lips.

Lena’s hips rolled against her, desperate for friction. She untangled her fingers from Kara’s hair and used them to guide the hero’s hand further upward, pushing Kara’s palm higher.

And then…

Kara’s alarm blared.

The hero shot up in bed, tumbling out of her damp sheets to switch off the button on her phone. Her hands fumbled for a moment before finally clicking the device off, the sudden silence almost as deafening as the ringing had been.

Kara rubbed a sweaty palm over her forehead. It had been two weeks since she’d kissed Lena at the CEO’s party, and Kara hadn’t been able to get the other woman off her mind. At work her thoughts would wander, imagination lingering over the memory of Lena jumping into the lake or the way her body had felt against Kara’s own in the water.

She couldn’t think, couldn’t breath. Snapper had sent her home twice now because dreams of Lena had kept the hero up at night and she’d almost fallen asleep at her desk three or four times.

Kara was tired, desperate, and if she didn’t shape up she’d probably loose her job, but Kara couldn’t help herself, couldn’t stop, she was addicted to Lena Luthor.

Kara slid her back down the bed, landing with a hard plop on her bedroom floor. She sighed. Her ears searched for the all too familiar sound of Lena’s heartbeat. She hadn’t dared see the CEO since the kiss at the lake, not as Supergirl or Kara Danvers. The memory of Lena’s pale, rigid face, of the way she’d looked at Kara like she couldn’t get far enough away from the hero still brought an ache up in Kara’s chest that she wasn’t sure would ever heal.

But even though Kara knew Lena didn’t like her, could never feel the same way about her, couldn’t bear to ever see the reporter again after the other night, she couldn’t stop herself from listening for the CEO throughout the day. Even when she tried not to, Kara’s superhearing would pick up on snaps of the CEO’s conversations or the sound of her troubled breathing at night automatically. It was like Kara’s whole body was tuned to Lena.

Kara focused in, ears picking up the sound of her neighbor feeding his dog and what she thought might’ve been James’ voice as he talked to Winn about new upgrades for the guardian uniform. After a moment sh discerned the steady thump, thump, thump of Lena’s pulse.

She listened intently for a moment, breath stilled, absorbing the sounds like sunlight. Ears still perked, Kara’s hands blindly reached for her phone. After a second they bumped into the device, Kara grabbing it and checking her inbox for the millionth time that night.

Still nothing. No text from Lena, no reply to Kara’s apologetic voicemail or even more sorry text. Nothing at all.

At the sight of the empty screen, Kara threw the phone across the room with a hollow thud. She forced herself to rip her attention away from Lena’s heartbeat, unable to bear it any longer.

What’s happened to me Kara thought quietly. She pulled her knees into her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs. With a cry she buried her head into the crook of her elbow.

When the dull pain in her chest subsided, Kara stood, changed into her Supersuit and sped out her window, hoping a night of saving others could distract her from herself and keep her thoughts from Lena, even if only for a second.

xxxx

“Supergirl? You’re needed at the DEO, something’s happened.”

Kara paused mid-punch, taking in J’onn’s words over her comm link.

“Copy that, be right there.” She gave the alien in front of her a finial right hook to what she guessed was its face—it was difficult to tell—and grabbed the unconscious body in her fists as she flew at light speed back to the DEO.

She landed with a thud on the concrete floor, tossing the alien to an agent near her, “Here, make sure you put him in a Python-reinforced containment cell, he’s stronger than he looks.” She trudged over to the command center computers in the center of the building, each footstep an effort to pick up and then put down.

Winn, Alex and J’onn were huddled over one of the terminals, black uniforms shining dully in the florescent lights. At the sound of Kara’s heavy steps, Alex nudged J’onn.

He turned his attention from the monitor and eyed Kara skeptically as she approached, hard stare lingering over the dark circles under Kara’s eyes and the drop in her shoulders. “You look like hell,” he said at last, arms crossed over his chest.

Kara stared at him blankly, “What’s the emergency?”

And for the first time since she’d met him J’onn hesitated.

Alex stepped around him, “maybe you should get some rest Supergirl, take a break for a few hours?”

Kara’s stomach twisted with dread, the thought of going home alone, of sitting in her apartment with nothing to distract her from her thoughts of Lena sending a wave of nausea through her. “I’m fine,” she said flatly, flashing a thin smile as she adjusted her hands on her hips.

Alex sighed. Things between the sisters had been tense since Lena’s dress had arrived that one night, the two barely talking and skirting around asking one another what was really wrong.

J’onn seemed to sense some of the strain in the air. “Look I don’t know what’s been happening with you two recently, or why the hell you seem so determined to chase every alien and criminal down within two hundred miles of National city, but Alex is right. This might not be the news you need right now. Its a B level alert, I can call Superman if I need. The important thing is you get some rest. L-Corp can wait till the morning.”

Kara’s head snapped up. “L-Corp?” her lips were cracked, “what happened?”

J’onn’s mouth pressed into a thin line, and Alex refused to meet her eyes. “We’ll talk about that after you recover, and I mean a full day off with sun lamps and”

“What happened,” Kara interrupted, and there was something in her voice, in the hard, almost feverish cast of her eyes that stopped J’onn short and set Alex’s jaw at a hard angle.

“Lillian and Lex Luthor have escaped.”

A sharp ache spread behind Kara’s forehead and black spots danced in front of her vision “Lena. Is she ok?”

“That’s not our primary focus—“

“Is she ok.”

J’onn was silent for a moment, “We don’t know. Our last Intel reports that Lena left National City about four hours ago, headed inland.”

Four hours? She’d been on the run for that long? Lena could be anywhere by now, could be in danger, could be dead. Kara swallowed. She braced her hand on the desk in front of her to keep herself from stumbling over. Her world seemed to narrow to a single pinprick in front of her.

Alex cleared her throat. Her voice filtered through the air to Kara as if it was coming from hundreds of miles of space “That’s not all. It looks like Lillian planned on going to jail the entire time as a way to get closer to her son in order to help them both escape.”

There was something in Alex’s tone that made Kara’s world suddenly turn blood red, her heat vision threating to spill out. “So?”

Alex looked at J’onn. The Martian placed a hand on Kara’s shoulder, but the hero shrugged him off. “So?” she repeated.

“So…” J’onn said evenly, “Our satellites pinpointed Lena’s last known location near Central City…the same location the FBI got a read on Lillian Luthor’s cellphone.”

Winn pulled up a map of America, Central City a blinking red dot somewhere in the Midwest. J’onn tapped the screen, “We questioned Ms. Luthor’s secretary and she confirmed that Lena removed several weapons as well as a substantial amount of cash from her office before leaving town.”

Kara’s stomach plummeted. “She’s not running away, she’s going after Lex.” Kara felt weak, like her world was about to collapse the way it did after she had kissed Lena at the party. She couldn’t loose Lena, not again, not like this. Another wave of nausea rolled through Kara’s stomach, she couldn’t live in a world without Lena. Even if the CEO never wanted to see her again, even if Kara only ever heard her heartbeat from a distance or saw her face on the cover of magazines, she needed Lena.

She was about to ask for a more detailed report when Alex’s quiet voice stopped her. “That’s what Jess said, but…the DEO has to consider the other possibility Kara.”

The words were said gently but Kara whipped around to her sister. “Alex” she warned in a pinched tone, knowing what was coming next.

Alex locked eyes with Kara, “She could be joining them.”

Kara stood motionless, “No,” she said barely above a whisper, the room suddenly feeling small around them.

“Its too convenient, Lena puts Lillian in jail then Lex escapes? And now Lena is within a hundred miles of both her mother and brother? It was a setup. Lex always wanted Lillian to go to jail so she could ensure his escape, and Lena’s participation with Supergirl was a way to buy our trust.”

“I have to agree with Alex on this one Kara,” Winn squeaked. “The data…”

“The hell with the stupid data,” Kara clenched her fists. She turned to Alex, “You’re wrong.”

“Kara. She’s been on their side this entire time.”

“No. But if you won’t help her I will.” Kara spun on her heel, already headed for the window, back facing Alex as a flinch filled the agent’s blurry eyes.

“Supergirl! Wait!” J’onn yelled

Kara’s mouth set in a hard line. She pushed past agents, vision red.

If the DEO thought Lena was helping Lex, it meant they hadn’t taken any measures to protect the CEO. Lena was alone, completely at the mercy of her family. If they got to Lena before Kara…

Kara’s heart stopped in her chest.

Her breath caught.

She shot into the air, exhaustion forgotten. She flew faster than she had ever done before in her life, breaking the sound barrier with a haunting boom as she hurtled away from the DEO.

xxxx

Kara flew until her legs shook beneath her. Flew until her eyes felt heavy with exhaustion. Flew around and around the earth until finally, out of 7 billion people, her hearing picked out the one heartbeat that sent her own pulse thundering.

She landed heavily, her tired legs shattering the earth beneath her feet.

“What the hell were you thinking” Kara said through gritted teeth, knowing Lena was still too far away to hear but not giving a damn anyway.

She stood up from her crouch, brushed the rubble and grass and dirt from her knees, stepped out of the small crater she had created.

She was standing in the center of a baseball stadium. The smell of hotdogs wafted over to her on the frost bitten air and a pair of planes buzzed over her head, banners advertising “Milwaukee’s Best Brew!” in all caps.

Kara marched through the field, ignoring the confused looks the semi-professional players shot at her, or the way her picture was plastered over the big screen, cameras focused in on her face.

Kara passed second base, the batter still frozen between the plates he had been running to before Kara interrupted the game mid throw.

The stadium was oddly quiet, a hushed suspense falling over the crowd.

Kara barely noticed, her ragged breath filling her ears. She stumbled over a barrier plastered with the name of a local pizza shop, using her supervision to pick out the pair of burning green eyes seated just behind the batter box.

Her cape hung limply off her shoulders, trailing over the bleachers with a slow swish.

Kara’s whole body locked onto Lena, every sense completely attuned to the other woman.

She watched as Lena closed her eyes, took in the CEO’s pale complexion, the burning fire smoldering wildly beneath her eyes, the way her lips looked bloodless.

Kara tripped over a step, her boot scrapping over the rough concrete and leaving a white scratch over the red material.

She was almost there, two more rows.

She was only fifteen feet away from Lena when she realized something was…off. Lena was sitting strangely, her back ramrod straight, her hands resting behind her back in an awkward position

No, not resting Kara suddenly realized, tied.

Fuck.

Kara’s eyes snapped to Lena, reading too late the terror in the CEO’s face.

A cackle erupted over the field, the noise shattering the stadium’s unearthly stillness.

Kara spun to face the noise. Lex’s face grinned out at her from the big screen.

“How nice of you to join our little game Supergirl, though I must say you’re late, you’ve already missed the first three innings, I doubt Superman would’ve taken so long.”

Kara felt a bead of sweat trickle down the nape of her neck. “What do you want Lex?” she asked authoritatively, feet slowly edging backwards, closer to Lena, hoping she could free the CEO before Lex noticed.

Another maniacal laugh echoed through the field. “For you to play ball with us of course!” He leaned in closer, his yellow teeth smiling dangerously out from the monitor, “But I’m afraid home team rules are a little different than you’re used to.”

Kara lifted her foot over a pile of popcorn, close enough to smell Lena’s perfume now. “This isn’t a game Lex.”

Lex clapped his hands gleefully, “As serious as your cousin I see. But that’s fine, I can match your mood; take one more step towards Lena and I’ll blow this fucking stadium to pieces.” Kara wavered, stopping a few inches away from Lena.

Lex clucked his tongue. “Good. And now that I’ve got your attention I want to tell you about a little bet I made this afternoon. You see I put four bombs throughout the ballpark, all attached to innocent civilians. ” Lex paused, grin widening madly, “And there is one, just one, attached my dear sister. You wont have enough time to save both.”

Kara’s mouth tasted metallic and her stomach felt like someone had kicked all of the air out of it.

“Now I say you go for the Joe Blows in the crowd, but mother thinks you’ll save Lena. If I win I get Lena’s half of the company, and if she wins she gets to keep the recording of a Super’s morals finally breaking” Lex licked his lips.

A tense hush settled over the field, and Kara could feel the eyes of the thousands of people in the stadium turned towards her, each hoping they would make it out alive, to go home safe to their husbands and wives and brothers and sisters. Every nerve in her body tingled, and her heightened senses could feel Lena’s eyelashes fluttering rapidly in the air behind her, each gust brushing against Kara’s impenetrable skin.

The color drained slowly from Kara’s face.

Lex’s bark of laughter turned into a hiss. “You’ve got four seconds. Choose wisely”

She hesitated before jumping into the sky, spent legs barely driving her into the air. She flew over Lena, hearing the CEO’s wildly beating heartbeat as she screamed, “No!”

1.06 seconds to detonation

Kara zoomed past, using her x-ray vision to rip the first bomb off a middle-aged man in a white t-shirt stained with chilidog sauce. She cradled the humming metal in her arms.

2.400 seconds to detonation

She found the second device on the pitcher, the third resting on an old woman’s lap.

3.185 seconds to detonation

She was going so fast Lex’s words sounded slow in her ear, as if the madman was taking years to say each vowel instead of milliseconds. “Oh…and..by..the.. way…it doesn’t.. matter ..what ..you …choose…they’re… all… laced.. with… kryptonite.” His laugher rumbled slowly, slowly over the field, each peel bursting in Kara’s ears individually. “you die no matter who you choose to save.”

3.677 seconds to detonation

She grabbed the fourth bomb, yanking it free from a young girl’s backpack, the pink material covered with Girl Scout badges.

3.889 seconds to detonation

Lena was screaming at her to go, but Kara couldn’t understand the words.

3.899 seconds to detonation.

The bomb came loose from Lena’s hands, a faint green light glowingly sickly from its core.

3.999 seconds to detonation

Kara sped over the tops of skyscrapers, past the buzzing planes. There was a soft beep and Kara threw the bundle of bombs as far as she could, already knowing it wouldn’t be enough.

The explosion sent shockwaves through the clouds. Green dust showered through the air, dark emerald spikes falling through it like shooting stars.

Same color as Lean’s eyes Kara thought faintly before the concussive force of the bomb sent her spiraling backwards. A piece of glowing shrapnel pierced her side, white hot pain blinding Kara, her throat burning as she screamed and kryptonite particles filled her lungs. She landed in the outfield, vision going dark.

xxxxx

"Supergirl, Please, oh god Supergirl please get up.”

The sky spun above Kara, her breath barely casting a white puff into the frozen air.

Something jerked her side and Kara screamed as her vision went dark again.

“Supergirl?” She felt Lena’s arms loop underneath her armpits as the CEO dragged Kara’s body across the field.

There was a patch of winter sunlight on the far edge of the field, and Lena pulled Kara to it. “Can you hear me?”

Kara tried to nod but her head lolled to the side. She coughed and blood splattered over Lena’s arm

Lena propped Kara up and crouched in front of her.

Kara tried to focus on Lena’s green eyes, but the emeralds swam in front of her dizzyingly, Kara counting three? No five? Pairs of eyes as her vision went double.

“Can you walk?” The words sounded so far away, and Kara felt her eyes slip lower, suddenly drowsy.

“Shit. Look at me, Supergirl. Please, you have to stay awake”

Kara fought to open her eyes. She felt lightheaded. She smiled loosely. “Anything for my favorite…” she swallowed “….my favorite,” her voice trailed off indistinct.

Lena cupped Kara’s cheek, “Sh. Its ok.” She ripped the plaid shirt she had on over her white t-shirt off. “I don’t know if you can hear me, but we need to get the Kyrponite out of you before it kills you.” Kara dipped her head yes. Lena took a deep breath and wrapped her fingers around the shard of green glowing beneath Kara’s ribs. “this is going to hurt.”

She gave a quick pull and yanked the green out.

Kara’s world flashed white. She gave an earthshattering cry and felt hot tears streaming from her eyes.

Lena quickly pinned her rolled up shirt into Kara’s side, the fabric absorbing the red leaking out of the hero’s suit. She tossed the green stick as far away from Kara as she could and turned her attention back to the reporter.

“My hero” Kara mumbled. The sunlight streamed onto her skin, and Kara managed a faint smile at the words.

Lena looked at her amazed, her green eyes reeling. But her face suddenly shadowed, “fuck, oh fuck, Lex”

Kara looked across the field her unsteady vision revealing a man in a long black pea coat gamboling over to them.

Lena picked up a can and threw it at him, the aluminum landing with a soft thump against Lex’s soft wool collar.

He giggled uncontrollably, “strike one.” Kara jerked her leg into the pool of sunlight, Kryptonian DNA bubbling.

Lena grabbed Kara and scrambled backwards, chucking a scrap of metal at Lex.

This time she missed, the scorched steel spinning harmlessly by his head. “Strike two!” Lex screamed with a skip.

Kara felt the sunlight on her back. An image of Krypton the way it had looked in the milliseconds before exploding flashed before her eyes. Kara put a wobbly hand on the ground and forced herself to stand. She got to her feet slowly, swaying dangerously.

She pushed Lena behind her.

Her side was slick with blood when she went to place her hands on her hips. White spots were dancing in front of her eyes.

“Ooo, still not done playing the hero are we?” Lex barked, “Well joke’s up little girl, you’re in over your head. You don’t know when to quit.”

Kara closed her eyes, took a deep breath.

Lex was only a few yards away now, a knife the color of a Sprite bottle dancing between his fingers.

Kara summed up the last of her strength and shot a feeble ray of heat vision onto the grass in front of her. It was barely enough to cook a turkey, let alone harm Lex, but it set the grass on fire instantly, flames leaping up between Lena, Kara and Lex.

Lex let out a howl of rage, but Kara didn’t stay long enough to hear its end. With a spin she turned and grabbed Lena, pulling the woman tight as she staggered into the air.

She barely cleared the stadium, more falling at super speed than flying.

Kara held out as long as she could, but after just a few moments she felt her powers drain and her altitude drop. Snow flew against her face in thick flakes. She tucked Lena in close to her and fell to the ground, skidding across the earth with a heavy thud.