Did Nazi that coming.
"Alright, what's going on?" Claire asks as Miti hands her a dress. "I can't wear this. All of my tattoos will show. And where will I hide my weapons?"
"Alright, so... we wanted tomake sure that no one was going to come after Hara and also wanted to know why they wanted her inthe first lace. S I\ve been asking question. Apparently being an actual nazi doesn't pay very well lately? And there are alot of last stashes, stolen valuables. precious metals. The locations of which were, at one point writteen down, but key peices of information got lost in the flames and when a group in south america found out about heaven's library and it's librarian who's made copies of every item ever written down ever."
"Well, shit. So... so what am I doing?" she sits down on the edge of the crapy hotel bed.
"Just get him to take you back to his place and steal back Hara's feather or destroy it. The place is warded not to keep us out exactly but to trap us if we try to enter and retrieve it. I don't even know how he got it. I had Zuri take her back to the library until we get it back." Miti sits next to her.
"There's no way i can conceal a weapon in this thing." Claire holds up the small strappy cocktail mini dress, and considers slingshotting it off her thumb into the trash can. "I\m not wearing this."
"It's what everyone's wearing to the gallery opening." Miti protests. "Don't you feel how soft that is?"
"Don't care." Claire hands it back. "Don't even think about replacing it with pastels. Anyways I need to stand out right? I'll stand out. Everyone's ina strappy dres, I\ll wear jeans and a t-shirt."
"We actually do want him to see your tattoos. At least he angelic wards." Miti says.
"Alright. Tank top then. I assume everyone will have their hair up?"
"Yes. It's grown back out wonderfully." Miti reaches over to pull Claire's hair back.
"It got a little help with that. Hel likes it long." She grins.
"She can't wear jeans and a tank top its a black tie event. And no, you can't just put a tie on it." Rye sits down at a desk, and starts sketching something out. "Obviously you can't bring your sword or a gun but I can work a carbon fiber blade into your boots and a garrotte in your sash." He holds up a drawing of a haltertop jump suit that clearly resembles a white tank top and jeans but for the string of blue diamonds around Clair's neck and silk sash threaded around the waist for a belt. He draws her hair half down, half up.
"I don't have nearly that much hair. Or that much bosom." Claire comments.
"I told him, but I assume he utilized artistic license." Rye shakes his head.
"It's almost impossible to tell when they switch who's in control of the body. They have the same mannerisms and speak the same way. It's actually kind of creepy."
Miti whispers.
"I heard that."Rye scowls at her. "And Its not artistic lisence. There's a built in push up bra with inserts one will contain the special oils and spell components Esther used to make herself especially alluring. Zach can give you thicker hair. I'm not calling you Rye. We are not food."
"Well, that depends who you're talking to." Claire jokes. "You can't just change his name. Why do you care anyways? What's your name? Rueben or something?" The vessel does not respond. "Oh my god it is."
"Claire, be nice." Miti nudges her.
"Okay, okay. Um, so we're going full siren song on this I see." Claire appraises the sketch. "How long will it take to... oh, okay." She takes the offered outfit when Rhy dissappears for a moment and returns with it. "I'll go change."
"I'll do your make up." Miti offers excitedly. "I've been learning."
"Okay. Oh, actually, go ask Krissy if I can borrow Death's garter."
"If you can't get the feather out of the room, the left insert has holy oil, you can douse and light it." Rye informs her.
"Do you need the knife that goes with it?" Miti pauses before she goes as the thought occurs to her.
"No, Miti, I just want to were my partner's lengerie as an everpresent reminder of our close and meaningful bond." Claire responds dryly. "Of course I want the knife. That's the whole point of a garter thigh sheath."
"Well, I don't know. girls borrow each others clothes all the time." Amitiel protests and dissappoints get the garter.
"Rye?" Claire calls as she puts the outfit on.
"Please save your sarcastic comments on the outfit for someone who cares." Rye responds curtly.
"Actually, I was going to ask if maybe I could keep this." Claire confesses.
"No prob. So it's a gallery? What does he look like?"
"It's an opening to an art gallery and here is a picture of your target." He slips it under the door. "He is not a necromancer."
"Woah, yeah I think I'd need Esther's allure to catch this guys attention." She whistles. "It''s not fair. Evil shouldn't be so damn hot. It really shouldn't."
"Unfortunately beauty is associated with darkness as mucha s it is light. If it wasn't appealing on multiple levels, it wouldn't be so effective." Rye informs her almost sounding bored with the explanation. "And I wouldn't worry too much about your appeal. You're clearly a nazi's wet dream."
"That better have been Rueben." Claire growls.
"Of course it was. I apologize for his rudeness, he's a little out of sorts."
"I can't speak german, or french or anything but english actually. I'm not going to have to be a racist dick, am I?" Claire grimaces as she checks her armpits in the mirror. it's hardly baby smooth but there are benefits to being super blonde and super tan.
"I don't know. I don't know how to seduce people. Does it usually involve rampant bigotry?"
"Claire, I have the garter." Amitiel appears in the bathroom, handing Claire a box.
"Jesus! wait outside!" Claire shoves Miti out the bathroom door
"No, usually just letting them tell you how great they are. But then I don't exactly go for nazi's. " Claire comes out. "I love this. Hel would love this. Those two things rarely happen together with clothes. Hey, take a picture of me."
"After your hair and makeup are done." He shakes his head. The phone starts to vibrate. "My sister is calling you? Why is she using a phone?"
"Because I only have a one way access to angel radio? Hey, Bree. S'up." Claire take it back.
"I can't believe she calls Gabriel, Bree." Claire just ignores him.
"Hey, Bree. s'up." Claire takes it back. Her face falls. "No, I'm off helping retrieve a feather. Are you okay?... Uh-huh.... Oh shit. No! You\ve got to be kidding me. It has to be more than just that. I mean she totally had it coming and it was our ideas after all. Let him cool down I guess and go back and apologize?.... you've been married before, you know damn well that doesn't matter. No... alright... I'll call you back once I'm done with all this okay? We'll figure this out. I promise. We did the last time right?... yeah well don't think I can't get my hands on some holy oil, you brat. I'm still planning that bachelorette party anyways, so you know don't do anything stupid like run into bed with other people right away, okay?... Yeah, I love you too you pain in the ass. Bye."
"What's wrong?" Rye makes the mistake of being the one to ask.
"None of your damn business that's what. If she wanted to tell you she'd have called you and not me." claire looks around. "What's with you anyways? You're acting like Zuriel."
"He's just mad because Zuri and I had a human experience together. You know the rules require the full knowlege and consent of our vessels and the other party and that's it." Amitiel defends herself.
"I don't care what the new rules are, it's still wrong."
"Please tell me you two just fooled around." Claire jokes.
"Yes, we did. We found an infertile married couple, both vessels, and explained the situation and the new rules and asked permission. They were both very helpful and said we could come back at any time." Miti says primly. Claire's jaw just drops. "Oh, that reminds me, Krissy made me promises to show you the latest sonograms. I\m sorry it took me so long. i had to track her and Hara down in the abyss. They went to go see the fledgelings again. They're all excited about the baby you see and plus Hara's the one doing most of the teaching at the moment. I did try to tell Krissy she shouldn't spend so much time there. It doesn't hurt anything but time runs differently and might even more questions. See?" Miti places the sonogram in Claire's astonished hand.
"More questions? Oh dear god!" She jerks back aat the terrifying empty eyed deaths head blur it's gaping maw directly facing the camera. "W-w-w-w..."
"See? It's already measuring for seven months when it's only four and a half." Miti points to the numbers up at the top. Claire just stares at her. "What's wrong?" Claire just points to the picture. "He's yawning." she explains. Claire stares harder. "A sonogram is not a picture perfect representation. This is a normal picture of a normal perfectly human baby. And see in the second one they confirmed it's a boy. "If she keeps going on like this she'll give birth in weeks, so I'm trying to get them to cut down on the visits to the abyss."
"Okay,"
"Let me go return this and I'll show you to the gallery." Miti takes the sonogram back. Claire walks over to Rye and leans on the table.
"So, Miti and Zuri. Sharing a human experience."
"We are not talking about this."
"Jealous?" She ventures. This just earns her a disgusted scornful look that's more believable than any flat no could ever be.
"Turn around. I have something I need to apply."
The art displays are just so odd. Grainy indistinct. It's like trying to look at one of those magic eye pictures, but she has the sneaking suspicion that there's not actually anything there to see and anyone who claims otherwise is pretending. The emperor has no clothes. And it has no more to see than a signalless analogue television no matter how long you look. Of course the next painting, in the darkest corner, is small frame like one of those very old boxy televisions with a bunch of static inside it. titled 'Magic eye' Claire starts to laugh despite herself and takes a glass of wine from the tray of a passing waiter.
"What is so funny?" The fetching fascist finally notices her. She only had to ignore every other man in the room. And several lovely young women.
"I was just thinking this." She points to it.
"I hope not. This is a meaningless pointless peice. I don't know why it's..." He leans closer to look at the name, "Ah the landlord's peice." He rolls his eyes. "This particular gallery is run by a man with the ideosyncracy of always having to display one peice by the owner made special for each show. It's usually trash. That just shows up the quality at the real displays." He shakes his head. "What brings you to Cali Ms."
"Eriks. But you can call me Lilly. I'm just visiting some freinds. They suggested I come to the gallely. Probably to keep me out of the villa so they can have some time alone." She rolls her eyes. "And you are?"
"Rolf. I'm visiting my grandfather. You are american, yes?"
"Currently. And you're german?"
"Yes. I just came into the city to see the lugar a dudas but unfortunately it's closed for repairs and a lovely young woman helped me procure an invitation. Were your freinds connected to one of the artist?"
"I don't know. They're odd people. On this round the world in eighty dollars kick to prove a point to daddy. I don't even understand the point of any of this honestly, but what else is there to do?" Claire shrugs.
"No? Well, allow me to enlighten you. This is really daring work when you know the history." He offers her his arm. A nice strong arm ina tailored suit with lovely green eyes. Claire reminds herself he's a nazi and nods.
"I'd like that." she lies through her teeth. well, it's not so big a loss, she can just stare at him instead of the art work.
Surprisingly just shutting up and staring at him with an occaisional nod and oh I see it now was seductive enough. He invited Claire back to his hotel to look at etchings which makes her laugh agian. Much to her surprise there actally are etchings.
"Your tattoos made me think of them." Rolf places a hand on the tattoo of angel wings on either side of a small anti-posession tattoo. It's been surprisingly popular. She got it done at a tattoo convention and paid for it with the sketch and it took off in popularity. Seventeen people had one by the end of the event. Of course the enochian wards and the 'no vacancy' message on the feathers, a permanent 'no' to possession, was added later. "What does this say?"
"What does what say?" She plays dumb as he looks at the words. To the unititated theyd just look like details on the feathering.
"The words on the wings. In the feathers."
"Words? There aren't words? There had better not be words." She turns to try and look at them, playing tipsy though she's not even buzzed. "Oh that bitch. what did she write on me? This is why you don't let siblings so things like this. It probably says something absurd like soup or unagi or something. is it chinese or asian picture things?" She moves to a mirror, pulling down the back ofher dress to get a better look. "I don't see any words. Just fluffy feathery stuff. Or is it like those pictures?"
"No. My mistake. Your freind gave you the tattoo."
"Yeah, she saw it at this tattoo artist convention and it looked cute but she wanted to put her own spin on it or something. She's really good. Isn't it beautiful? Do you see how detailed it is?"
"It's exquisite." Much to her surprise he kisses her right on the antiposession ward on her spine giving her shivers. Claire quickly reminds herself he's a nazi. "Do you have any more tattoos that are not usually displayed?" he asks, running his hands up her sides as he straightens up.
"I do. You'd have to turn out the lights. It's a special ink, great for working a respectible job, and having not so respectible nights." She smiels and takes a special blacklight from her denim purse and sets in on the table. He smiles and turns off the lights int he hotel room. Claire turns the little blacklight on and backs away from it before turning so the light reflects off her shoulder blades. it illuminates the invisible tattooed wings on her body, when she raises her arms, the motion connects a sigil and the spell flashes out, the sound of the man dripping to the floor, unconscious, was her to take the zip ties from her purse and gag him with a blindfold and his own tie in case he wakes before she finds it.
Fortunately the mother of pearl feather is 'hidden' in a collage of other mother of pearl shapes ont eh wall. Hiding in plain sight. Unless you already knew what hara's feathers looked like it would be too easy to miss. She tries to pry it off but it breaks. Better not to leave anything, but this thing will be hard to conceal in the dark. Claire quickly places the collage in the bathtub, pokes a hole in the holy oil insert and lights it, leaving the door open and the fan on. She doesn't leave until the feather itself is burned to nothing and steals a few valuables and his wallet on the way out for appearances sake.
They need to find a way to make those nazi bitches forget about Hara entirely. Maybe she could get Krissy to get not to talk to Lethe or something.
"How did it work?" Rye asks as soon as Claire re enters the room.
"Fantastically. Who thought of that tattoo spell? Was it you? I'm going to have to start calling you Q."
"Actually it was Rueben. He's incredbly creative. He designed the dress as well." Rye confesses. "I like finally having an oulet for my strange doodling and experiments." he continues. it takes a moment to realize that one was rueben.
"Cool.Thanks, Rube. You need to come back to the states with me and talk to Sam and Dean. They're making a school and sanctuary but why not have an R&D department, too? This is just fantastic. Oh, I've got to get back though." She rifles through Rolf's wallet. "Here, give this bundle of whatevers to poor people or stuff. The kind that nazi's hate the most preferrably. "She hands it to Miti. "I have to get back home and talk to Bree."
"Is our sister okay?" Miti asks handing Claire a bag of her old clothes in it.
"No, but you know just... give her space. Let her talk when she wants to talk. Not world or life threatening or anything, but still, send me home?" Claire holds everything together.
"Of course." Miti takea her by the shoulder and takes her back to Jody's where she's greeted by a few hoots and whether from Jody and Alex.
"Looking good, Novak." Alex grins.
"You're back soon, everything go alright?" Jody looks her over.
"Oh yeah, it was nothing. I just had to bat my baby blue eyes at a nazi, burn a feather. Rye's vessel is a hell of an innovator. There was this invisible ink temporary tattoo... oh shit!" She covers her mouth. "I left the little blacklight in the nazi's hotel room."
"You didn't actually sleep with.." Alex starts to ask.
"Oh, hell no! God, if only he wasn't a nazi though. Oooo, they should put that on a recruitment poster." She fans herself a little. "Um where's Sam?" she looks around.
"He and Bree went off to fight in private. I assume they're currently making up so we have the house to ourselves for a while." Jody gets to her feet. "That is a gorgeous dress, Claire. I mean it."
"Thanks, but they're not making up. Not yet." Claire gives Alex an odd look as she notices her sister staring at her. "What? Is something showing?" She puts her hands to the top to make sure. she doesn't quite trust these backless halters, and is fairly sure that it's Hel's godly powers that keep her from flashing more than she intends at any given moment.
"Your... breast.." She motions to her own. Claire looks down. Oh right, a cup on the left, c cup on the right.
"Oh, whoops." Claire takes out the other insert, the one with the allure enhancer. "I used the other to destroy the feather... What are you looking at me like that for?"
"I don't know.. you... you smell really good." Alex looks vaguely disturbed by her own observation.
"I what? Oh shit!" she quickly tears open the little bag and scatter the components. 'I am so sorry. I forgot about that. Guess you're not as straight as you though, huh?" claire grins at her.
"Were you wearing a love spell?" Alex accuses her.
"No just a bit of Queen Esther's stuff."
"Queen Esther's stuff? The Queen Esther who barged in on the king at risk of death but looked so hot she was offered half the kingdom instead? That Esther? Her beauty stuff? Is anybody that straight?"
"Not you, girlie." Claire grins at her. "How do I look now without the lust tinted horses?" She poses.
"Eh." Alex shrugs. Claire just scowls at her. "I'm kidding. It's gorgeous and kind of you, honestly."
"Good. Think Hel will like it?"
"I'm sure she will." Alex scoots over and pats the sofa. "So what's up with Bree?"
"I think they broke up again. Or at least called off the engagement. Is there a difference between the two? I don't know." Claire sits down. "How the hell did he find out about our little ventures? And so quickly?" she gives Alex a steady semi-accusing look.
"Garth called." Alex quickly absolves herself. "It wasn't me., but you know we went too far. She's being looked at for Mr. Shurley's murder, Claire."
"He was murdered? There's a body? So much for divine protection. Wait. We didn't.. what? How did that happen? Crap. No wonder he was mad. We're going to have to fix this." Claire takes her phone out.
"So, a hot nazi?"
"So hot. It's horrible." Claire groans. "Evil people aren't allowed to be that cute. Thats against the rules."
"Who's rules? Walt Disneys?" Alex rolls her eyes.
"No, he's a nazi, too, wasn't he? or just anti semetic. Anti something dumb at least. Hey, Bree. I'm home. Mission accomplished. We need to do something about this. I think maybe murder charges were a bit much... well, we didn't do it! What am I supposed to..." Claire sighs and looks at Alex. "She hung up on me."
"Well, you did just accuse her of framing someone for murder." Alex reminds her.
"Like she hasn't done worse."
"Not the point, that would have directly violated the promise she made to sam instead of just defecating on it's spirit." Alex snaps. "We never should have done this. What were we thinking?"
"That he wouldn't have found out? At least not nearly so fast." Claire scowls. it's really unbelievable how fast he found out.
"We weren't thinking about anything but what she did to Sam and how we could get back at her for it." Alex continues as if her sister didn't say anything. Claire's not sure if it was a conscious ignoring or if she just didn't hear her. "We got carried away. Who the hell are we to judge her anyway? None of us are saints. We didn't have the right. at all."
"Let's give Sam a bit and go apologize and try to make things right. Ifwe can fix thigns or something. Maybe he won't be so mad in a week or two and then maybe they can make up easier. This isn't enough to end a relationship, right?"
"No. It isn't. Maybe it wasn't. Maybe it was just the last straw. I mean, Dean and Bree are always at each other's throats. You know her brothers aren't any happier even if they are behaving better. She can't help but poke at things all the time. That and... they kind of had a point at the panel. She's never going to win over Dean, ad he doesn't likeher and anyone Sam's with... it wouldn't work if big brother couldn't accept the relationship. They mean too much to each other and Dean's too damn stubborn."
"Those losers didn't know shit." Claire snaps. "They thought Sam and Lucifer had more of a canon romance and even made a better couple. They're idiots and if they have girlfreinds and boyfreinds, probably won't for long if they think the devil is a better significant other than Bree."
"I know, but..."
"No buts. They'll work it out if we have to trap them both in chains and a ring of holy fire to talk it out." Alex almost doesn't want to argue with Claire's determination especially when she sets her jaw that way.
"It'll be a bit harder now that she has her grace, and I'm not sure she'll be so nice as to turn me into a honey badger again." Alex's eyes flit to the table despite herself. Claire notices, because of course she would.
"What's this?" She grabs the letter. Alex tries to grab it back but Claire just wrestles her down on the sofa and sits on her back up near her neck. "Dear future lover, we have much to talk about. bland predictable introduction but with a few naught innuendos, I''d love to get to know you better,but for my own safety must do so from afar... naughty embarassingly sweet naughty naughty oh hillarious but still naughty. A classical reference which I assume is classically naughty. From your devoted admirer. Oooooo a secret admirer is sending you letters from your own address? Creepy." She checks the return address on the envelope.
"It's a cheat, a way to garuntee the letter gets here even if he fucks up on postage." Alex scowls. "I already sent the return letter in a similar envelope."
"Do you know who it is? It's probably Rhys, the little stinker. Don't let him get away with this."
"I won't but it's kind of cute, love letters. It's so weird and old fashioned." Though the smile on Alex's face shows that she loves it.
"He's trying to get into your pants."
"Through the mail? That'd be quite a trick." Alex comments. Claire just smacks her butt. "Hey! I'm just letting him know I'm not mad at him and not interested, okay? Now get off before Im forced to throw you and rip this lovely jump suit thing." Alex moves, just enough to prove that she can.
"Okay, okay," Much to hersurprise Claire gets up. "I'm going to go change and go to bed. I'm surprisingly tired. good night." she drops the letter back. "Ifhe hurts you, let me know and I'll have him fixed." Alex just sighs and looks over the letter again. It's not that naughty.