Curiouser and Curiouser
"That was awesome." Dean laughs, stepping out of the garage. "Did you see how freaked out she was?"
"I don't know, that wasn't exactly my brother killed my fiancee levels of 'freaked out'." Sam says doubtfully. "But just in case you let Cas know about this right?"
"Of course." Dean makes a face. "And what do you mean you don't know?"
"I have to agree, it's possible she wasn't exactly taken in. No one's successfully pranked Gabriel yet, though she did pretend for a few of the younger angels."
"Alright, well, we'll keep going as if she was until we know for certain other wise. How long before she..." Dean starts
"They're on their way." Raphael informs them. The Winchesters go back into the garage as Raphael snaps his fingers, returning the bunker to it's normal, semi-pristine state just as his siblings light down in the bunker.
"Gabriel." Castiel gives an exhasperated sigh, looking around at a room entirely devoid of spattered winchester and butchered goat. "I am very busy. I don't have time for your pranks. It's bad enough you are having me tend to your responsibilities, but actively disrupting me as I try to do them..."
"No. I'm not, I swear." She turn around herself. "It wasn't like this a moment ago. Where is it? Raph, where's the goat?" She demands sternly.
"What goat? The one you tried to sell me into marriage for?" Raphael asks cooly, his voice absolutely deadly as he lifts his eyes from his book.
"Yes, that goat. It was on the table. You dismembered it?"
"I did no such thing." Her brother replies heatedly. "Why would you possibly think I would harm an innocent animal just because you're an irritating, disrespectful brat? What sort of nonsense are you spouting this time?"
"Then where is it?"
"I don't know and I do not care to know. It was most certainly never on the table."
"Is there anything else? I have work to do, Gabriel." Castiel crosses his arms, "Your work to be precise. Can I return to it?"
"I don't know, do you really think you can fix it?" Sam wipes his hands off on towels as he and Dean walk in from the garage in oil stained coveralls. "Really it might just be easier and cheaper to sell it for parts and get her a new one. Or even build her a new one."
"Maybe but I'm still going to try. It's her first car. She earned it herself, and she put alot of love into it and that means something." Dean explains a little defensively. "So we are going to do everything we can to save this nightmare, do you understand me?"
"Okay." Sam lifts his hands. "I'm just saying. Hey, Babe. Where have you been?" he walks over to his finacee bending over to give her a kiss.
"Done already, baby?" Dean smiles at Cas, who frowns and shakes his head.
"No, Gabriel decided to inform me you and Sam had been splattered across the bunker walls."
"Huh, you'd think I'd have noticed something like that." Dean smacks his butt as he passes them on his way to the fridge. "Can you stay for long enough to eat a sandwich at least?" He winks at his boyfreind who's blush elicits a raised eyebrow from Raphael, who immediately goes back to ignoring the younger angel's existence.
"Perhaps." Cas says quietly, looking away from the others.
"Honey, you really shouldn't bother Cas while he's working. Honestly, you should be up there helping him." Sam chides her. "There's a lot to do and with all of you working together it can get done a lot faster."
"Actually I was going to try and find Hannah in fantasia." Babe rallies herself looking at each of them in turn.
"Where?" Dean asks, through the bag of bread held in his teeth as he pulls out fixings from the fridge.
"The abyss." Castiel explains.
"It's not 'the abyss' it's Fantasia. It's my world, I can name it what I want, and I'm naming it Fantasia. The abyss is gone. Fantasia remains. Fantasia. Repeat after me 'Fantasia'." Babe insists.
"Yeah, whatever." He dismisses her, she just shoots him a withering look.
"It's probably going to take a while though. I mean, hell if I know which angel is which in those things."
"You don't?" Raphael sounds genuinely astonished.
"You do?" She retorts just as astonished at his confusion.
"Of course I do. I know every single one of my siblings no matter what form they're in. In truth, I don't know how you managed to conceal yourself from me."
"I gave my old vessel the same wards the Winchesters have." She says simply, this just gets her a skeptical look from her brother. "What?"
"Those wards work on you as well. How could you... were you unable to locate yourself? Did you exist in that vessel for thousands of years never knowing where it was?" He challenges, leaning forwards in his chair.
"Don't be silly. I edited the wards, that's all. Just, you know, the part that reffered to me."
"Wh...Those wards are complex creations carefully crafted to work together and you cannot just change part of it and expect it to work properly. You can't... you just can't do that, Gabriel! It couldn't possibly work."
"Well, obviously it could because I did and it did." Raphael tries to gather his thoughts to further expound on how incredibly wrong and impossible it is despite that, but is unable to think of any satisfactory response to this absolute reckless absurdity. "Oh, that reminds me. Raph, do you think you could go label the eggs with who's inside?" She smiles at him hopefully. As it's a far more reasonable question with a far more reasonable answer, Raphael decides to let the previous nonsense go.
"Yes, I could, however there are over half a million of them. It is not something that can be accomplished quickly." He explains. "And aside from this particular favor to you, I have Michael to tend to. I don't like leaving him alone."
"Well... Just the ones that are clear and cracking then. Those are the ones ready to hatch. They just need their loved ones to come and coax them out, that's all. If we know who they are they can be revived. And while you're doing that, Michael and I can play with the fledglings." She offers. When Raphael nods, she snaps her fingers to bring up a large clunky robins egg blue manual label maker and holds it out to him. Raphael just looks at it.
"Very well," he ignores it. "I will arrange it with Michael." Raphael disappears.
"Where are the kiddies?" Gabriel looks around. "You know, the little hunterlings that were here earlier."
"They're in the a.. fantasia." Sam corrects himself. "Visiting with Harahel. Krissy's going to have the baby and give it to Josephine and Aiden to raise. Josephine doesn't entirely trust Krissy to take proper care of herself, so she's kind of hovering. Aiden went along to keep Krissy from snapping and murdering her."
"I see. Can I talk to you for a minute Samshine? In private?" Babe grabs his arm and takes him outside to the top of the bunker where the goat is still grazing. "There you are, junior. Glad to see you in one piece."She pats his head. The goat just stops chewing long enough to give her an unimpressed mildly irritated look then goes back to eating the grass.
"So...." Sam waits for her to speak.
"That was kind of adorable." Babe smiles, hopping up to give him another kiss, wrapping her legs around his waist to keep herself closer to eye level. "You and Raph, working together to try and prank me, you cuties." She pinches his cheek.
"You weren't fooled huh?"
"Well, no. Not about you at least. I was a bit worried about Dean and the goat, and a bit weirded out by his ability to recreate carnage so convincingly, but not really no. After all he said he wouldn't hurt you, and when he says something he means it and does his best to follow through. He's reliable like that."
"But you still worried about Dean and the goat?" Sam smiles holding onto her.
"Well, I realized I forgot to ask him not to do anything to them, so... I had a moment. So good prank, honey. I give it four out of five stars. It was kind of a cruel one but I more than had it coming. I assume it was your idea. Raphael's not really the pranking kind."
"No, actually, it was Dean's idea." Sam informs her. "So can I take it your day together went well?" Babe just makes a face, scrunching up her nose. "That bad huh?"
"Yeah, he's going to be a hard sell. You want me to still play along? See where else he goes with it? I mean, I was going to, but you kind of have a point about responsibilities and to be honest, it would probably end up places we didn't want it to go."
"That's so mature and responsible and so damn sexy." Sam kisses her neck. "I love it when you talk cleanly to me." he teases. Babe laughs and tosses her head back making Sam adjust his footing so he doesn't fall. Unfortunately the goat's in the way and they tumble over him.
"That's my Sam, graceful as fuck." she grins at him as he watches the goat take off to a less crowded area. "At least you and Raph are getting along okay." She puts her hands behind her head as he pushes himself up.
"He's not really what I expected given his... prior interaction with Dean and Cas."
"I bet. He can be as big an asshole as he is a sweet little snuggle bunny." The description of Raphael as a snuggle bunny makes Sam laugh. "really, war makes monsters of us all, you know. And the bigger and more important your choices, the more horrible the results of your mistakes and failures. I know you at least would have some compassion and understanding for that." She reaches up to caress his cheek. "I never wanted that kind of responsibility. I don't know what I'm doing and even trying is driving me insane. Every time I set foot in heaven, I feel so cramped and suffocated and all I can think about is how soon I can get away again."
"You just need to find your own style of leadership, that's all." Sam reassures her, kissing her forhead.
"I'm not a leader. I don't want to be a leader. I can't give them the structure they need to flourish. I just can't. Cassie should be in charge, not me. Or Hannah should, or both of them. It shouldn't be me. Just because I'm an archangel doesn't mean I'm automatically fit for the job. And I don't want it them to have to realize that the hard way."
"Well, Castiel is more of a military leader. He'd be more suited to being a Ceasar. Maybe your leadership role can be in finding the best people to be in charge of things and letting them do it. Do you want to sit down and look into what it'll take to restructure things to better suit all of your needs and strengths.? Or even to function adequately without you. There is a responsible way to step down if that's what you really want to do." Sam brushes a leaf out of her hair.
"You think I can do that?" Babe frowns. "They're not going to be happy about my stepping down and leaving heaven no matter how I do it."
"That's probably true, but you still owe it to them not to just bolt and throw everything into chaos. You know if you keep denying your feelings and forcing yourself to do what you're doing the way you hate doing it when you're already starting to chafe at it to this degree, you'll just end up exploding and doing something rash you'll regret later. Try to find a way to fit and have a responsible exit strategy. So you know you're not trapped. And you aren't. You're as free as you ever were." Sam soothe her. Babe rolls her eyes. "You are. You're choosing to do this, Gabrielle. They can't force you to be in charge. You know that. You're choosing to try to be there for your brothers and sisters the way they need you to be right now. Even if they don't appreciate how hard it is for you to do this, I do, and I think you are a wonderful, loving big sister. You just need to hold on a little bit longer and try a little bit harder, that's all."
"You're right. I know your right." She sighs and puts her arms around his neck. "I really hate that about you." Sam just grins and pushes himself up when she tries to kiss him again.
"C'mon, Babe, not in front of the kid." He nods his head towards Dean junior. She tilts her head back to look at it and laughs.
"That's terrible, Sam. You should be ashamed of yourself."
"Why don't we take an hour and you can teach me the error of my ways, and work on those plans in between." Sam suggests.
"Sounds good. Hey, Junior, tell daddy we'll be back in an hour." She snaps her fingers making the message appear on a small banner tied between it's horns.
"Is it just me or is it getting hot out here?" Sam frowns.
"Either way lets go get you out of these stifling clothes." She snaps again sending the goat into the bunker and her and Sam to her little get away, leaving their clothing behind.
"Hey!" Krissy waves as Gadreel notices her and her freinds at the gate. "S'up!"
"Hello, Krissy. Do you have business here?" He asks politely. "How is the baby faring?"
"He's fine, I guess. And I'm here to see Harahel. He can't find a vessel so this is the only way we can see each other right now. I know you're guarding so I figured we'd wait and ask permission and stuff or at least just check in so you know who's wandering around in here."
"I appreciate your consideration. I have no problems allowing your visit. Who are these humans accompanying you?"
"These are Josephine, and Aiden. My freinds and the future caretakers of junior here." Krissy pats her stomach.
"We're her foster siblings and you are not naming that poor child Thanatos." Josephine states firmly.
"I could just call him Nat. Or Baby Boy Chambers until he turns eighteen and I cansend him off on a quest into the abyss to find his true name." Krissy holds her hand out spanning the horizon. Josephine just gives her an unamused look.
"I wondered how humans choose their childrens names given the fact that they do not seem to know their children's character and personalities or talents upon the choosing of them." Gadreel wonders aloud.
"We just choose names we like or that have meaning to us, that's all. I'm named after my grandmothers. Eloise Vutton-Chambers and Kristiana Petrovich." She makes a face. "I never knew them, really, my parents were both late born only children."
"Did your father think you much like them?" Gadreel leans on his spear.
"Not really. Kristiana was very old world and domestic and stuff, very devout modest chaste. Eloise was a stage actress, very feminine all lace and frills. I look a lot like her, Dad said. Except she didn't have a real beauty mark. Really I'm more of a tomboy." She shrugs. "Not nearly as much as Claire, but yeah. Is Hara here yet?"
"I believe so. He frequently comes to read to the fledglings and bring them books. Can you walk there? Do you need me to carry you?" Gadreel asks concerned. Krissy just gives him a flat look.
"I'm pregnant, not crippled. And not very pregnant at that."
"My apologies. I have no familiarity with this particular human condition, but I had heard that special care must be taken of the mothers. I did not wish to offend you."
"No, it's fine. I'm fine. Thanks. Carry Aiden, I think he's about to faint." She points back at Aiden who looks not a little nervous at the tall flame red angel with burning charcoal wings.
"I'm good." He just stares at him.
"Fear not, Aiden. I mean you no harm so long as you do not molest my brethren as they slumber." Gadreel addresses him kindly.
"Okay." He nods looking at both the spear and the sword. "I won't."
"Krissy." Josephine takes a bottle of water out of her bag and hands it to her. "You need to stay hydrated."
"Alright." she sighs and takes it. "Oh, I should probably let Nat know." Krissy heads off throught the nests. "Later, G-dog."
"You haven't talked to him about this yet?" Josephine exclaims following her.
"I just... I don't know. Why does he have to be involved in this?" She asks a bit uncomfortably.
"Because he's the father and has the right to have a say in his childs welfare. Besides it's the right thing to do." Jo shoves her shoulder. "Is there a reason you shouldn't?"
"No, he's a good man, I just... It feels so weird. And I just feel so bad about not loving him, or wanting to marry him or have a family, it's just..." she squirms uncomfortably and opens the water bottle.
"Well, suck it up, woman. It's worse for him being the one with unrequited love. You are an adult now, act like it."
"I am not an adult! I mean I am, but really I'm not. What even is an adult anyway?" she whines.
"A person who can't weasel out of their responsibilities without far reaching and possibly devestating consequences."
"Ah fuck, I am an adult." Krissy groans, leaning back onto Jo's hand. "Uhhhhhh, I don't wanna. You be an adult for me, okay?"
"Sorry, each woman's burden is her own to bear. I'll take they baby. That's it. Your personal life is your responsibility." She gives her a shove. "Drink your water."
"Yes, Aunt Josie."
"Do you think we could pick out a name?" Aiden asks after a minute. "Or make suggestions at best."
"I dunno, you're going to be molding his very mind and character, can't I at least have the name?" Krissy considers. "Suggest away though."
"What about Nathan or Nathaniel? That way you can call him Nat after his dad, but not saddle him with Thanatos."
"Krissy!" A pale blue angel with gorgeous mother of pearl wings flies over swooping her up in a hug high in the air. "I'm so glad to see you! How's Krissy Junior?" he rubs his cheek against heres and lights down again.
"He's fine." She winces. "Hold on. I'm a bit nauseous."
"Damn Harahel." Josephine looks him over. "I take it back. You're too pretty to be a boy. You're a girl now, okay?" Harahel looks both mildly confused and bashfully pleased by the statement.
"Actually I was thinking it would be easier and more appropriate if I identified as female. It seems to be the most accurate in terms of hte things I like. I mean, I am kind of feminine I guess."
"You're Hara, you like what you like. But if you'd rather be a girl I don't blame you. We are kind of awesome, huh?" she winks at him.. her. "And we're not naming the baby after me,"
"What's a male version of Kristiana? Christian?"Aiden muses.
"Oh, yeah, I'm sure a greek god would love having his firstborn son named 'Christian'." Krissy rolls her eyes.
"Right. Christopher? Kristof?" Aiden lists off.
"What about Chrysander? It's old greek. It means golden. And he can still be a Krissy junior!" Harahel suggests.
"That's not too bad. I'll add it to the list. Though usually boys are named after the father not the mother and involves identical names entirely first and last. How do you spell that? I'm texting it to Nat." Krissy takes out her phone.
"C-H-R-Y-S-A-N-D-E-R. I've missed you so very much. I'm so happy there's going to be a little Krissy. Can I be his angel? Will Thanatos be alright with that?"
"I don't care and of course you can. No other angel could ever be good enough to be my baby's angel but you." Krissy hugs Hara again letting the angel wrap her wings around her. "I wish I could find a vessel. I'd love to have you with me for this. If only so Jo will back off."
"Do you want to see the little ones? They'll be so excited to see a pregnant human." Hara takes Krissy's hand and starts to lead her off, not waiting for an answe.
"Sure."
"It's easier to read to them after Michael visits and wears them out. I understand now why our father gave you humans the gift of sleep. Children are very difficult." He shakeshis head. "I didn't remember the later batches being quite this energetic."
"I always thought angels just popped into existence fully formed exactly as they were supposed to be." Aiden comments looking at the eggs. "You, know when I thought about it at all."
"If that were true no one would have rebelled. I don't know. I don't really understand our father. I never even met him. Gabriel said that he was brighter than Michael, brighter than Helel even. The only thing that was... Who knows how they should be. We all just do the best we can with what we're given, even angels."
"Humans!" A bunch of little angels pop up.
"They come in different colors?" One exclaims and they swarm Josephine.
"Oh, he's so pretty."
"It's a girl human. She has the bubbles on her chest."
"She looks like Raphael. But her hair is so much softer." Aiden quickly starts shooing the fledglings awy from his irritated girlfreind before she looses her temper.
"No. No. Don't touch. She's not a toy and doesn't like it." he scolds them.
"We're sorry." they chorus, backing away.
"Can I tell them?" Hara asks Krissy his eyes pleading hopefully.
"Oh, go ahead." She sits down in the long grass, motioning for the other two to do the same.
"Children., guess what!"
"What?" They all guess gleefully turning their attention to him.
"This is going to be very fun and good." One confides to Josephine with a whisper.
"This is Krissy. You remember Krissy." they all nod. "Krissy is a girl human and what can girl humans do that boy humans can't?"
"Bleed for seven whole Days without dying!" The little grey angel announces. Aiden tries to stifle a laughter and turns away.
"That's menstruation and it's solar days not creation Days. It is connected to that. Make another guess?" Hara corrects him gently as the humans try not to laugh at the adorable things.
"Theyyyyy build a tiny human in a room in their stomach?" Josephine smacks Aiden's back as he starts to snort. Krissy's better at keeping a straight face.
"Very close. Girl humans have a uterus. a special place for tiny humans to form and grow and turn into whole people. To help them, the mother's body provides warmth, shelter, nutrients, hormones, love and a kind voice to welcome them into the world."
"Does she have a baby in her uterus?"
"Yes. I do. Probably a boy." Krissy informs them. They all just look up at her in pure awe.
"Can.. can we touch you?"
"Why does it have a tail?" One asks peering at her closely, squinting her eyes.
"What?!" Krissy looks up alarmed at the question.
"It's very small still. The tail will go away and form into a spinal cord."
"Why don't humans in the drawings in the books have stripes but they do? Are there different kinds of humans who don't have them?" Another similar looking one asks.
"They can't see them, so they can't draw them. They only just found out that they were there. But we're discussing pregnancy. I will return shortly with more books on the subject. Do not touch the humans without their permission." Hara sternly asserts and flies off.