Stuck
Alex looks around the empty space. There's nothing but long greyish grass in a small field, only broken by burnt footsteps leading into the distance. She follows them until she sees Michael, still curled in on himself but on the ground, surrounded by a small border scorched earth along with a large patch in the shape of wings at his back. but instead of dead black marks on the ground, they're live crackling coals. Fading but not faded.
"Michael?" She steps into the small clearing, careful not to step on the coals.
"Are you real?" The young man asks, not looking up at her.
"Yes. Are you alright?" She kneels down by his feet, careful not to burn herself. "Can you stand?"
"I can. But there's no point in doing so." Is the honest reply.
"Maybe there wasn't but there is now. Your sister and I are here to get you out." She says gently. "But we need your help to do it."
"My sister is dead. My brothers as well. The little ones have forsaken me just as our father did. There is no point in anything anymore." The dull, hollow reply pierces her heart. "Better I stay where I am until I can be with them again."
"You can be with her now. Yes, she died, but... she got better." Alex's statement gets an annoyed look from Michael. "No, really. Haven't you heard her calling to you? Trying to get you to get up? To take her hand? Yes, she died a couple times, but she's alright now. I don't... I don't know if you heard everything I was praying to you..."
"Hallucinations."
"I'm not a hallucination. Though given I was just in the cage a moment ago and now I'm wherever this is, You might be. But I'm here to help you." She goes to reach for him but a feeling of intense pain stops her. "And in case it's you, or a shared hallucination. I'm not sure how things work in here. I think I fainted or something. Taking your hand led to a response, so I hugged you. I'm sorry if that was intrusive. You had just said that they don't usually touch you and I thought being alone here for so long... maybe you, your vessel, might be a little touched starved. It hurts though." Alex takes a breath and tries to focus on the soft grass around her. Even being this close to him now makes her ache.
"It hurts?"
"Like slapping a sunburn with a hot towel. Only more so." she confesses. "Please try to get up and leave the cage with me. If not for your own sake, your little brother, Raphael, he needs you and loves you and wants you even if you think no one else does."
"Raphael is dead."
"Yes and no. He's been kind of resurrected as well, but refuses to leave the abyss and help with things until you're safe and sound. I'm not entirely sure why he won't even leave..." Alex explains the situation as best she can. Michael slowly starts to move, sitting up.
"If he leaves and sees everything, he'll feel the need to help fix it." Michael says softly. "It's very difficult for him to see people suffering and not do anything. Better he stay where he's safe and can't suffer for my sake anymore. You should leave this place."
"I know. So should you. You don't deserve to be here in the first place." Alex's statement seems to surprise him. Not that he believes it, but the fact that she does is surprising. "If you need some strength... I can let you have some of mine. Bree showed me how to transfer some to you."
"No. Just go and let me fade away."
"No."
"I can't protect you like I could Adam. I don't have the strength and taking yours would only pain you more."
"You don't have to protect me." Alex reaches over and places her hand on his arm. "But I'm not leaving without you."
Raphael walks through the absurd fields of nests and egg shaped chrysalis. Only Gabriel could think of something as ridiculous as this. The darkness infecting so many of them breaks his heart. Even worse is when he sees two Imriels in a nest together. One who fell with Lucifer, and died in that first battle and the other who sided with Raphael in the second civil war. His Imriel is the darkest, most saturated of the two. Raphael closes his eyes and tries to convince himself that it's not what it seems like. He couldn't possibly have led his siblings farther astray than his brother.
Maybe it's just pain and the scars of living. His Imriel lived so much longer. Maybe it's because of actions, personal mistakes. His Imriel had so many more opportunities to make them. But no matter what alternative explanation is true, it's no comfort. At the very least means he failed. That every horrible thing Raphael made himself do to try and help and save his siblings from pain, suffering, and damnation just hurt them even worse, or at best wasn't enough. Nest after nest it's the same thing. And so many of his followers, dead. Did Castiel kill them all? How could he have done such a thing? How could Raphael had led them all to their own distruction this way. How could he ever been so arrogant as to try and rule heaven himself. What's worse is the fear and pain in the angels that shy away from his voice and touch. It used to comfort them. Even scolding them, his presence would make them feel relieved and relaxed, feeling that everything would be alright.
"Raphael." He looks back to see one of his healers, Zachariah, Rye. He'd perished in the assault on hell to retrieve Dean Winchester. One of the few losses, pushed into one of his siblings blades in the onslaught. Such a stupid infuriating way to loose one his most faithful students. Stupid and wasteful, not matter what Michael said. And his own fault. He had purposefully delayed sending anyone until the first seal was broken. If he hadn't... if he'd done things properly... maybe there wouldn't have been any casualties at all. It's impossible to tell, but he didn't the blame for every single lost brother and sister rests squarely on his shoulders. "I need to talk to you."
"You may." Raphael says quietly, as he can't decide what of the million things in his mind he wants to say to his healer.
"Do you remember Amitiel?"
"Of course, I remember all of them. I assume you're referring to your Amitiel, Miti."
"Yes." Rye looks at his hands, gathering his courage. "Do you remember what you had her do for you and your interrogators? What your rehabilitation officers did to her when she objected?"
"She assisted in interrogations." A brief summary, but in truth it was more than that. She told them what was true, what wasn't, what kind of truth and lies they were, what was just a wrong belief. It would have been impossible to help keep as many angels in line as he did without her help. Impossible to keep as many as they did from having to be put to death. "I wasn't aware that she ever objected."
"No? You didn't have an inkling that she might at some point have a problem with telling your men who to torture?" The angel looks so angry. "You really think she would have willingly had her memories erased?"
"Her only job was to verify the veracity of an angels statements. The decisions of what actions to take or corrections had to be made in regards to the results of her determination were not in her hands in the slightest. I don't recall having her memories erased. Nor do I recall being informed of her distress. I was under the impression that she understood the full impact of her assistance, that she understood what was at stake."
"No?" Rye says bitterly. "I suppose that's possible. If you could deceive Michael the way you did, I suppose your minions could have taken your example." The words make Raphael cringe. "When I came back, and learned what had happened, I was devastated that the two best angels I knew could have torn heaven in half the way they did. But I was relieved that I was spared having to make that choice. I wasn't sure who I would have sided with, who I thought was in the right, regardless of who won or lost in the end. You both did such terrible things.
"But I thought I knew you both. I loved you both. I had such faith in the both of you, that even if I questioned your choices, your methods, your love for us all and the essential goodness of your natures made it worth trusting you and forgiving you each your mistakes. I still do, I have to, but you... you broke her, Raphael. You broke my favorite song. The kindest, bravest, most honest and pure angel I knew. All she had ever done was search for truth and understanding. She trusted and believed in you and now she hates her self. She blames herself for every harm done to every angel her assessment ever caused to be... persuaded of their errors.
"I know she sided against you in the end, but the harm was done before that." Rye trails off, unable to think of what else to say. What could possibly convey the extent of his feelings of disappointment and betrayal.
"What do you wish me to do?"
"I don't know. Fix it? Make things right? Apologize maybe? I don't know what could possibly make up for everything." Zachariah sits down heavily on the edge of the nearest nest. He doesn't sound hopeful, though. "Alex has done so much for her, but..."
"Who is Alex? There's no angel by that name."
"She's human. She's a healer of the mind, a therapist. Well, she's training to be one, but she has a gift for it. She helped Zuriel be a little less.. contentious... which is a major feat." Rye makes a face. "And when Miti got her memories back... in just three months, she helped her go from a broken weeping wreck convinced she didn't deserve to be an angel at all to taking back her grace and returning to heaven, able to face all the brothers and sisters she felt she had wronged. But she still hurts and seeing you just started to break her all over again."
"Therapy? For the mind? And feelings?" Raphael raises an eyebrow at this. "Is this a profession now? What exactly does that entail? How do you heal a broken mind?"
"Talking, listening, asking questions as far as I can tell." Rye frowns. In truth he doesn't understand it himself.
"Talking, listening, asking questions." Raphael repeats dryly. "Lies and manipulations."
"No." Rye shakes his head. "Not lies, and definitely not manipulation. She helped her reorder her thinking, that's all."
"How is that not manipulation?"
"It's... helping guide someone to the truth is not manipulation." Rye looks flustered as he doesn't quite know how to explain. "It... I know it sounds ridiculous, but it works."
"I know it works, Lucifer did it all the time." Raphael snaps. "Amitiel is the angel of truth. She doesn't need to be led to it."
"Yes, and you're an angel of healing." The rest of the accusation remains unspoken but doesn't sting any less for it. "There's a limit to truth. Facts vs opinions. you can know a partial truth but not know exactly which part. Feelings and experiences, interpretations. You can hold beliefs that are wrong, but not be lying. You can believe you are worthless and bad with all your heart and be wrong and not know it. If you call helping Miti realize that she's not the irredeemable monster she thinks she is manipulation, then maybe there's something to be said for being manipulated." Rye flies off in a huff.
Talking, listening, asking questions, altering an angels patterns of thought with nothing but words... That kind of seduction and manipulation is what made so many of their siblings fall in the first place. how could any angel possibly think that handing a vulnerable hurting angel over to one capable of such a thing is a good idea? The first thing he'll have to do is go see this Alex and make certain she stays far away from him siblings.
"Hara." Harahel jumps slightly as someone tugs at the back of his jacket. "Harahel. Little brother. My small brave little itty bitty teensy weensy tiny wingless little thing." He turns to see Gabriel smiling at him in a very unsettling manner. "I need a little help with something."
"I... you do?"
"You'll kind of need to leave your vessel behind."
"Um, we're kin of in the middle of a hunt an I don't want to leave Krissy..."
"Yeah, I'll have you back soon." She reaches in and yanks him out, dragging him away through the veil, leaving Saul suddnely alone in a body with no one at the helm. Before he can take control of his body, he falls spilling the half melted ice bucket all over himself.
"Goddamn it."He complains, picking up the bucket and trudges back to the room. "Hey. Joe.... you have any spare shirts?" he tosses the bucket onto the chair and takes off his drenched tshirt. "Stupid friggin angels."
"Hara?" The hunter raises an eyebrow at him.
"No. Saul. Hara's sister came and dragged him away somewhere for something." He rubs the back of his head. "Where's red?"
"Draining the local bar, flirting with local women. Do... do you remember anything from when the angel was using you?"
"Tons, Mr. 'accidental dick pic'. He set up picture in picture for me on the tv so I can see and hear what's going on. I don't appreciate it when people give me things to have to explain to him like that. " Saul gives Joe a look. "What the hell's wrong with you, man? That is not the way to get a girl in bed."
"Hey, of the two of us, who's gotten her into bed? huh?" Joe goes to take a beer from the fridge.
"Geez, no wonder she's so touchy with assholes like you in her life." Saul grabs the beer from him.
"Please, she loved me. You don't know how hot it can be, fresh from a hunt, blood racing, heart pounding, all sweat and danger, fear and adrenaline, both of us in our prime. She's got one hell of a mouth on her." Joe takes another beer.
"If she 'loved' you, she sure as hell doesn't anymore. And a picture of the thing that failed to keep her interest wouldn't undo that. Especially as she has a greek god for a lover." Saul takes a drink.
"Does she really?" Joe frowns.
"Yeah. It's kind of weird, but you need to just let it go. Seriously, man, she's not interested. And no friendly reminders of what she lost can rekindle that little spark. I mean, just hire a prostitute."
"She's interested. Trust me."
"Naw, man, she's really not. So leave her alone, okay? She has enough on her plate right now. She doesn't need to deal with some rich bitch fuck boy." Joe just raises an eyebrow at this.
"How do you know I'm rich?"
"The car, the clothes, the watch. I'm a professional poker player, I'm good at seeing who has the money to put where their mouth is. Just leave her alone, okay?"
"Or what, you'll tattle, too?"
"No, but I'll keep my angel from interfering when she snaps and beats the fuck out of you."Saul sits down on the other empty chair. "He's too nice. He'd try to save you."
"I can't believe he threatened to tattle to his sister." Joe laughs.
"That's kind of the worst threat this angel could make. Or most of them actually. Do you really not know who Gabriel is? Who she was moonlighting as? Loki? Trickster extraordinaire. Once killed a man for leveraging his fame and power to take advantage of young girls? Had an animal tester eaten by a sewer gator? You probably won't be killed now, but trust me, it won't be any consolation."
"Krissy... she's in some strange company, isn't she?" Joe looks over at the sleeping hunter, who's crumplked up the covers into a sort of makeshift body pillow. He can't remember her sleeping this soundly.
"Yup." Saul just drinks his beer as Joe starts to look worried. Whether the hunter is worried for himself or for her, Saul's not sure. But since guys who send unsolicited dic pics aren't generally in tune with the feelings wants and needs of others, he can probably make a pretty good guess.
"You want me to what?" Hara clings tightly to his sister as she flies him own to the cage.
"Just to get her out, at least." She coaxes. "Please, Hara, you're the only angel outside of flegelings that could even possibly squish down small enough to fit through the gap."
"I'm not in my vessel. I could... I could kill her just by being there!"
"She's unconcious. Please, Hara. We can leave her in there." Babe begs.
"What if... but.. Michael.." Hara looks down. "Oh, no...." he looks at his faded sister. "How... how did she get so weak?"
"I don't know." Gabriel lights down on the top. "I can reach my arm in but that's it. And I can't leave my vessel because it's unoccupied. Plus wings aren't that flexible. You're only the size of a small apartment building. Without your wings you should be able to squish through. Here. I'll hold onto your ankle and lower you down so you can get her." She puts him down.
"She's so little. They're so little." Hara looks down at the pair and kneels down by the gap.
"Head first." Gabriel kneels down and takes hold of his ankle. Hara puts his arms and head in the gap and slowly squeezes himself in as far as he can go. His robe catches and tears and he's sure his entire body is bruised. When it reaches his hips, he can't go any farther. "Crap." she tries pushing him but it doesn't work.
"I'm stuck." Hara informs her rather unneccesarily. "OW!" He yells as she blasts his backside to try and force him through. "Stop it! I won't fit anymore!"
"Why is your butt so big? The smallest angel with the biggest ass!"
"Hey!" Hara scowls up at her. "I am as my father made me. What's left anyways."
"Can you reach them? Can you reach Alex at least?" Babe asks. Hara sighs and reaches down to no avail.
"Maybe if I was a little further...owowow!" he complains again as his sister grabs his ankles and drags him up the length of the bar as far as she can. "Hold on..." he reaches out and manages to grab hold of Alex's shirt with the tips of his fingers. The cage is so small, how could two angels have ever fit in there? Does it shrink? Get bigger? What? He tries to move her gently but just ends up loosing his grip, tearing the fabric. But it moves her from physical contact with Michael's vessel at least. "She's waking up. Get me up get me up!"
"Here, toss this over her head." Babe hands him a small quilt that she had tucked in her belt. "Alex keep your eyes closed." she calls as Hara drops the quilt over the small human beneath him. "Okay, I'm pulling you up." Babe starts pulling on Hara's ankles but he doesn't budge.
"OW! Stop! Stop!" The figure under the blanket cringes at the noise. "Sorry, Alex. Stay under the blanket!"
"Shush." Babe smacks his bottom. "Alex. Stay covered. Hara's stuck in the gap sans vessel. Don't look or he'll blind and maybe kill you. I'll be right back."
"No! Where are you going? Don't leave me like this!" Hara cries struggling to free himself one way or the other.
"I'm getting help. I'll be back, I promise." She flies off. Harahel sighs and covers his face. Why is he always getting in these situations? It's because he left the library. If he hadn't left the library to help Castiel find those wines, he would never have come to this. But he just felt so guilty about almost killing his brother in that training accident, he wanted to go that extra mile. And now he's wingless, stuck in the bars of Lucifer's broken but not broken enough cage, and Krissy's pregnant and alone with a jerk about to hunt a cult a werewolves. Hopefully Saul will look out for her and keep her from injuring Joe if he goes too far.
And really if he hadn't left the library, he wouldn't have met Saul or Krissy which was nice. And maybe he did help a little with getting Gabriel back, though anyone could have done what he did. He was still the one who did it. He accomplished something that mattered. Of course, if he ends up stuck in the cage for the rest of eternity it won't be worth it. Stupid older siblings. He never wanted to act like that with his younger siblings, so he didn't, but no one ever remembers he's older than anybody. But he won't be here forever. They have to get Michael and Alex out and they wouldn't get them out and just leave him here, would they? No, of course not. But what if they can't get him out? What if he's just stuck so tightly even when they take the cage apart he's still stuck in the bars.
Maybe he should just go back to the library, if they get him out. he can't get in too much trouble just being in the library, and Saul could get a better angel that doesn't annoy him as much and can better help Krissy. Actually, though, That's not true that he can't get in trouble in the library. He killed Nathaniel in the library. And he doesn't have his wings and parts of the library doesn't have floors. It never mattered before. he should put floors in though. do any of his siblings know how to build floors? Of the ones that are left anyway.
"Are you okay, Hara?" Alex asks quietly from under the quilt.
"Yes." Hara whispers, hopefully not hurting her hears. Alex can't understand him of course but hopefully that he can say anything at all is answer enough.
"Michael's not doing so well. He doesn't think I'm real. Will you try to talk to him? I'll stay under the blanket and put my fingers in my ears."
"Um..." Hara's at a bit of a loss for words. He's not exactly sure what to say. The last time he spoke to Michael about anything directly he was getting yelled at for throwing his blade into the ocean after that training accident where he tripped and almost killed two of his siblings. It's not exactly the mark of a great relationship or one that really means anything. In truth, Michael probably doesn't even remember his name.
It's not exactly something he wants to bring to the attention of his eldest sibling, either. Especially as even after hiding in the bottom of the ocean after the angels were cast from heaven he still wasn't able to find it again. Sure maybe making her angry might energize her enough to break out or something, but despite the fact that Harahel's done things he'd never thought himself brave enough to do, intentionally pissing off Michael requires a whole other level of bravery entirely. One he may never reach. So he just waits there silently for Gabriel to come back.