Make Me Feel Good
Lexa tugs at her collar and clears her throat anxiously. Lexa is really nervous. Clarke grabs her hand and Lexa instantly feels calmer. Lexa can hear movement at the other side of the door. The door swings open and it’s a young boy, maybe around 12 years old.
“Who are you?” The boy eyes them suspiciously.
“Uh - I’m um..are you parents here?” Lexa nervously rambles and Clarke squeezes her hand in support.
“My dad.” The boy says calmly. “Dad!” The boy hollers and more footsteps are heard. Lexa shakes her head.
“This was a bad idea. We - we should have called. Let’s go.” Lexa whispers into Clarke’s ear.
“Shh. We are here. Let’s just see what happens okay? I’m here. Don’t worry.” Clarke whispers back and Lexa nods slowly. She’s still freaking out but Clarke is here and that’s all that matters.
“Hello?” A man with a kind smile approaches the door. He ruffles the boy’s hair and the kid walks away, uninterested in the strangers at the door.
“Hi sir!” Lexa squeaks out. She clears her throat before she continues. “I’m...well I was wondering if Olivia Moore lives here?”
“You’re her.” The man states plainly, shocked.
“W-what?” Lexa stutters out.
“You’re my Livy’s first child. You’re Alexandria.” The man says in awe. Lexa stands there dumbfounded.
“I am.” Lexa says emotionally. “Um is she here?” Lexa asks with hopeful eyes. The man’s eyes grow sad.
“Come in. There’s something we should talk about.” The man says sullenly and Lexa feels knots in her stomach form. She knows something really bad is about to happen but her and Clarke walk into the apartment anyway.
///
“Lexa! Lex, you have to calm down.” Clarke desperately pleas with the emotional girl. Lexa was eerily quiet once they left the apartment. Once they got home, Lexa started freaking out. She tried to open up the liquor cabinet but when it wouldn’t budge, she threw a vase against the cabinet.
“Please Lex.. talk to me.” Clarke tries again and Lexa turns around, breathing heavy. There are tears freely falling from her eyes.
“She was suppose to be my chance! A mom who loved me..” Lexa starts crying harder. Clarke cups her cheeks.
“She did love you. Didn’t you hear Kyle? She always talked about you. She was just waiting until you were 18 and then she was going to contact you.” Clarke says softly.
“She’s dead Clarke! It doesn’t even matter anymore. I’ll never know her.” Lexa sobs, lowering her body to the floor. Lexa burrows her head into Clarke’s neck, a waterfall of tears hitting Clarke’s neck.
Clarke cradles Lexa back and forth, letting the girl cry on her shoulder. It’s not fair. Lexa can never catch a fucking break. Clarke knew something was wrong the second Kyle, Olivia’s husband, sat them down to talk. He told them that Olivia was in a car accident four months ago. She died on the scene. Clarke feel Lexa’s heartbreaking right next to her.
Kyle is a good man, Clarke could tell. And Lexa has a brother too. Aden. When Lexa is ready, Kyle and Aden could be a part of Lexa’s family. But for now, Lexa has to mourn both her mother and her father.
Lexa’s cries subside to sniffles until she’s completely silent. Lexa nudges her nose against the wet skin of Clarke’s neck. Clarke holds back a shudder, focusing on comforting Lexa. Lexa slowly removes herself from Clarke’s embrace and her eyes land straight on Clarke’s lips.
“Lex..” Clarke murmurs, seeing exactly where Lexa is looking. Lexa pulls Clarke in by her head.
“Please Clarke..” Lexa whispers and it’s heartbreaking. Clarke nods slightly and Lexa presses her lips harshly against Clarke’s. Lexa just needs to feel alive. She needs to feel Clarke’s heart beating underneath her touch. She needs to forget that she’s an orphan. She needs to forget.
Lexa kisses Clarke hard and it’s nothing like the kisses they shared before. It’s rough when Lexa is usually sweet. Lexa pushes her tongue in Clarke’s mouth. Clarke releases a little whimper and it only spurs Lexa on more. “Get on your back.” Lexa mumbles against Clarke’s lips as she crawls on top of Clarke.
“Lexa, you’re mourning. We shouldn’t..You’re not thinking clearly.” Clarke says breathlessly.
“I just need to feel you. I need to feel something good right now.” Lexa’s voice croaks at the end. Clarke pushes back Lexa’s hair behind her ear.
“Just a little kissing okay?” Clarke says softly and Lexa nods.
“Whatever you want..always.” Lexa says sincerely. She just needs to feel Clarke right now. She can’t explain it. Clarke makes her feel safe and at home. Her kisses melt her heart.
Lexa molds her lips against Clarke’s. Clarke kisses back feverishly. Lexa starts grinding down on Clarke and the bloan lets out a feral moan. Lexa bites and harshly sucks on Clarke’s neck. It’s rough, hard, and fast. Clarke can tell Lexa just needs a distraction from everything right now. Clarke knows this and she’s letting it happen because she knows Lexa cares about her. Lexa would never dream of using her. Lexa needs physical and emotional intimacy and comfort right now and that’s what Clarke is going to give her.
Lexa lets out a grunt as she humps Clarke, groaning as her bulge presses deliciously against Clarke. Clarke feels like she’s on fire. Maybe she should stop this now. It’s getting much more heated than she planned.
“Lex..” Clarke means for it to come out firm but instead it’s more of a breathy moan. Lexa takes it as Clarke wanting more so she moves her hand down to the button on Clarke’s pants.
“Wait wait..Lex...not like this.” Clarke gently pushes at Lexa’s shoulders and Lexa immediately stops her movements.
“I’m sorry. Shit! You said just a little kissing.” Lexa frantically apologizes.
“It’s okay Lex. I love kissing you, but you’re not in the right headspace right now. I’m here for you Lex. I’ll always be here for you. You will get through this.” Clarke says emotionally and Lexa nods, tears building up in her eyes.
“Please don’t leave me too.” Lexa mumbles and it breaks Clarke’s heart. Lexa is never like this in front of anyone. She hates being ‘weak.’ But with Clarke it’s different. She’s different.
“Never.” Clarke says gently, hugging Lexa tight and kissing her forehead. She will always be here for Lexa no matter what happens between them.
///
Two weeks later
“Griffin! Nice leg work today.” Echo calls out as Clarke grabs her duffle bag. It’s Friday and practice ran a little late.
“Thanks.” Clarke says with a sincere smile on her face. Her and Echo are friends now. Echo is actually really cool, platonically speaking of course.
“You’re coming to the party later right?” Echo asks with a smirk on her face.
“Yup.” Clarke pops the ‘p.’ “With my girlfriend.” Clarke says the word ‘girlfriend’ with a dreamy smile on her face.
“Ah you wound me Griffin.” Echo teases back all in good fun. The whole school knows that Lexa Woods is dating the gorgeous new girl Clarke Griffin. Truthfully, Echo loves them as a couple. Clarke chuckles and shakes her head.
“Babe?” Lexa says softly. She gives Echo a tight lipped smile, still insanely albeit irrationally jealous that Echo has touched her Clarke.
“That’s my cue.” Echo mumbles, still joking with Clarke. “See you at the party Woods.” Echo calls out behind her shoulder as she walks to her car.
Once Echo is gone, Clarke leans up and presses a tender kiss to Lexa’s lips. “Mm Hi baby.” Clarke mumbles before kissing Lexa again. Clarke eventually tries to pull away but Lexa pulls her back in for another long sweet kiss.
“No.” Lexa pouts against Clarke’s lips. The blonde chuckles. “Oh you haven’t had enough yet?” Clarke whispers against her lips.
“Never.” Lexa growls, pulling Clarke impossibly closer.
“Sixth period under the bleachers wasn’t enough for you?” Clarke huskily says and Lexa shivers. Both Lexa and Clarke have 6th free so they always go under the bleachers and makeout...a lot.
Lexa has a dopey smile on her face, thinking back to Clarke’s lips sucking love marks on her neck. Clarke is like really good at grinding.
“Earth to Lexa?” Clarke chuckles at her oh so horny girlfriend. Girlfriend. Clarke still can’t believe she’s Lexa’s girlfriend. On the train ride back from NYC, Lexa asked Clarke to be her girlfriend. Of course Clarke said yes. Lexa is still grieving. There’s no denying that. But just this week, she started seeing a therapist after Clarke encouraged her to. Clarke thinks it will do a lot of good for Lexa. She’s been through so much.
“Sorry. I was just thinking about how good you make me feel.” Lexa sweetly says.
“Such a charmer.” Clarke teases, holding out her hand for Lexa to hold. “Come on, I want some dinner and nice long shower before the party.”
“Mm I’d like a nice long shower too.” Lexa jokes and Clarke bites her lip to hide the smile. They still haven’t had sex yet. Only makeouts. It’s not that Clarke isn’t ready. She absolutely is. She just wants to wait until she knows for sure that Lexa is okay. The basketball player has been through so much these past few weeks. Clarke just wants to be there for her.
///
The party is fun and filled with alcohol. Clarke is sure to keep Lexa away from Ontari and Echo. She knows Lexa is jealous about Echo. Lexa isn’t obvious about it and she’s never said anything to Clarke because she knows it’s not her place, but Clarke can still notice the little glints of jealous in Lexa’s eyes when Echo teases Clarke.
Clarke and Lexa leave the party early and go back to Clarke’s house. Beatrice left while Lexa was in NYC. The whole legal process has been very smooth actually. Lexa and Laurel’s lawyer is very smart (although very very expensive). He filed Lexa’s emancipation papers immediately after she got home from the city. Jake also signed on to be Lexa’s financial and legal guardian for the time being until Lexa’s emancipation could be cleared. Jake allows Lexa to sleep in Clarke’s room during this time but the door always has to be open.
However, tonight Jake is staying over his lovely new girlfriend Indra’s house. That means Lexa and Clarke have the house to themselves.
Clarke pushes Lexa on top of the bed as soon as they make their ways up the stairs. Lexa plops onto the plush mattress and hungrily watches as Clarke crawls up her body. Clarke feels like tonight is finally the night. It just feels right.
Clarke takes off her top while straddling Lexa. Lexa’s eyes widen. This is the first time she’s seen Clarke without a shirt on.
“Clarke..” Lexa says in awe. Lexa takes a big gulp.
“I’ve fallen in love with you.” Lexa didn’t realize those words were coming out of her mouth until they do. Clarke’s seductive smirk falls and is replaced with a soft sincere smile.
“Really?” Clarke says so sweetly that Lexa’s heart feels like it’s going to burst.
“Really.” Lexa says surely and pulls Clarke in for a kiss.
“I love you too.” Clarke whispers before unhooking her own bra. Lexa’s grip on Clarke’s waist tightens when she sees Clarke’s beautiful naked breasts and pert pink nipples for the first time.
“Are we gonna..I mean are you ready now?” Lexa asks awkwardly. Clarke chuckles at her adorkable girlfriend.
“I want to… that is if you wan-”
“Yea!” Lexa squeaks out and shakes her head vigorously. She clears her throat and calms herself down. You’re acting like you’re an overexcited virgin Lexa. Calm down. “I mean absolutely. I love you.” Lexa says softly before rolling them over so she’s on top.
“I love you too. This feels right. You feel right.” Clarke says softly as Lexa kisses down her chest, taking one of her breasts in her mouth. Clarke sighs out happily, threading her fingers in Lexa’s unkempt brown curls.
Lexa spends a very very long amount of time worshipping Clarke’s breasts with her tongue and fingers. Clarke’s panties are soaked through and through. Lexa’s wet tongue swirling around her nipple causes the most pleasant of tingles to hit her core. Clarke’s legs wrap around Lexa’s waist and pull her girlfriend’s body impossibly closer.
Lexa starts grinding her bulge into Clarke’s center and the blonde mewls at the overload of sensation. Her breathing is heavier. She doesn’t think she can take another second of this teasing but she’s also too shy to voice that she wants more. Thankfully, Lexa can read her like an open book.
“More?” Lexa asks gently. Clarke smiles and nods. “Yes please.” Clarke sweetly says, her voice husky with lust.
“Okay yeah. Yeah.” Lexa mumbles excitedly, seemingly more to herself than to Clarke. Clarke giggles until Lexa takes her top off revealing her perfect abs and breasts. Clarke loses her breath.
Lexa takes off her bra and her pants eagerly before slowing unbuttoning Clarke’s pants. Clarke is panting really fast in Lexa’s ear as the girl slides her hand into her soaked panties.
“Wow.” Lexa mumbles hotly against Clarke’s skin. Clarke is breathing heavy, her chest moving up and down with each breath. Lexa rubs Clarke’s clit slowly and softly. A few seconds later, Clarke is whimpering in her ear.
“That feels…” Clarke mumbles. “Good..really good.”
Lexa smiles at the girl squirming below her. Lexa is a little ball of nerves. She’s pleasured many many women before, but this is different. This is Clarke. She wants her first time to be perfect. That puts a lot of pressure on a girl.
“You like what I’m doing to you?” Lexa whispers softly. Clarke nods, her eyes shut and lips smacking together.
“Can..can you do more?” Clarke asks shyly, a deep blush hitting her cheeks. Lexa’s eyes widen a bit but she mumbles out a ‘yeah.’ This is really happening. She’s going to have sex with Clarke. She’s going to be Clarke’s first. Lexa gulps. She’s nervous but excited. This doesn’t feel like just sex. It feels like something much bigger, something Lexa just can’t put her finger on.
Clarke’s eyes flutter open when Lexa pulls her fingers out of Clarke’s panties. Clarke stares lustfully at her girlfriend on top of her. The basketball player sits up a little so she can pull of Clarke’s panties and jeans in on motion. The only barrier left now is Lexa’s boxers.
Lexa gets back on top of Clarke and kisses her softly. Everything about this moment is tinged with sweetness.
“Are we really doing this?” Lexa asks breathlessly as she grinds into Clarke. Lexa groans when she feels Clarke’s wetness soak through her own boxers. Lexa is a bit nervous. If just grinding with Clarke feels this good, then what will being inside Clarke feel like. Lexa hopes she can last long enough to please her amazing loving girlfriend.
“Y-yeah.” Clarke stutters out, her nerves starting to get to her. She’s so inexperienced compared to the girls that Lexa is used to being with. What if Lexa gets bored? What if she doesn’t enjoy herself. All these thoughts decide to strike Clarke right now.
Lexa senses the change in the air and stops completely. She settles on top of Clarke and pushes back the sweaty few stray strands of blonde hair littering Clarke’s face.
“What’s wrong, love?” Lexa asks worriedly. Clarke bites her lip, contemplating if she should tell Lexa. Clarke wants to always be honest with Lexa though so she decided to just rip the bandaid off.
“I’m worried that I’m not going to be as good as you’re used to.” Clarke says sadly, refusing to look Lexa in the eye. Lexa’s heart immediately aches.
“Clarke, I love you.” Lexa cups Clarke’s cheeks tenderly. “I love you so much. This isn’t just sex to me. This is so much more.” Lexa presses her lips to Clarke’s forehead, keeping her lips there for a few seconds. “I know I’ve been with other people, but please just..” Lexa sighs out. “They don’t compare to you. They will never compare to you. This is already better than anything I’ve ever experienced in my life. I promise.”
“You’re perfect.” Clarke smiles softly and pulls Lexa into a loving kiss. Lexa breaks the kiss and looks down at her love.
“While we are on the subject though, I um - well I am nervous too.” Lexa awkwardly stutters out.
“Why baby?” The term of endearment falls out of Clarke’s mouth and it causes sparks to bloom in Lexa’s chest.
“I just...I want to please you. I want this to be..perfect. What if you have expectations I can’t meet?” Lexa mumbles and it’s Clarke’s turn to battle Lexa’s insecurities.
“Lexa Woods, I wish you could see what you do to me.” Clarke says quietly. “The only expectation I have is that I share this moment with you. Nothing else matters okay?” Clarke rasps out and Lexa nods. “We are thinking entirely too much with our heads.”
“Head over heart.” Lexa mumbles under her breath.
“What?”
“I always used to say ‘head over heart.’ It was sort of like my motto.” Lexa says quietly.
“Well not anymore okay?” Clarke says gently and Lexa smiles wide.
“Not anymore.” Lexa whispers before diving in for another kiss. With their insecurities successfully washed away, Clarke’s hands start to wander down Lexa’s bare back settling on her lover’s ass.
“Can I take off my boxers?” Lexa asks sweetly and excitedly. Clarke bites her lip and nods.
Lexa’s dick springs out of her boxers and Clarke marvels at it. It’s average, maybe a little bigger than average. Lexa’s v-line is hot and leads to a perfectly manicured trail of brown curls. Lexa smiles sheepishly under Clarke’s gaze.
“Can I touch..?” Clarke trails off and Lexa nods softly, secretly exploding with eagerness inside.
“I don’t really know what I’m doing.” Clarke mumbles as she grips the shaft of Lexa’s dick. Lexa moans softly at the sudden touch. Lexa is on top of Clarke with her dick pressed in between them.
“Do whatever feels right.” Lexa says softly, letting Clarke take the lead where she wants this to go. Clarke nods and starts slowly pumping Lexa’s dick, twisting her hand a little at the end. Lexa groans and burrows her head into Clarke’s neck as pleasure besieges her.
“Am I doing this okay?” Clarke asks curiously.
“So good.” Lexa grunts out, her voice muffled by Clarke’s neck. Lexa starts sucking on Clarke’s neck. Between Lexa’s wet lips on her skin and touching Lexa so intimately, Clarke can feel her wetness spreading more and more.
“Clarke..” Lexa moans out loudly, her body overwhelmed with pleasure. “I’m gonna come soon.” Lexa weakly warns. Lexa bites Clarke’s neck playfully and the blonde gasps out in surprise. Clarke gently stops her movements and Lexa whines slightly. Lexa smiles sweetly, her eyes crowded with lust.
“You’re good at that.” Lexa mumbles before eagerly reattaching their lips together. Clarke feels pride for pleasing Lexa so well. Lexa sucks on Clarke’s bottom lip hard as Clarke wraps her legs around Lexa’s waist. Lexa’s cock makes contact with Clarke’s soaked center. The basketball player’s hips jerk and grunts out in bliss.
“Fuck, we need a condom.” Lexa groans out, her body on fire. Clarke is so wet for her.
“Top drawer.” Clarke moans out. She may have never had sex but she’s always prepared just in case. Okay okay, she may have bought a box of condoms last week. She knew her and Lexa would have sex soon enough.
Lexa leans over and pulls out a condom from the drawer. She carefully rips the foil open and places the condom on her member. Lexa rubs her dick through Clarke’s folds before aligning with her girlfriend’s entrance. Lexa starts to push her member in, taking Clarke’s virginity. Clarke lets out a loud moan mixed between the feeling of being full and a slight stinging sensation. Lexa groans loudly. Clarke’s walls are already pulsing and pulling her in. The blonde is so tight. Lexa slowly pushes her whole length in and forces herself to still so Clarke can get used to the fullness.
“Is this okay baby?” Lexa moans out.
“Mhm yeah. You can move.” Clarke whimpers out, her nails already making a mark on Lexa’s back. Lexa starts moving expertly, in and out, in and out.
“Wrap your legs around me again.” Lexa softly demands and Clarke obliges. The feeling is so much better. Lexa starts hitting the spot. She knows it because Clarke is screaming out her name. Lexa’s moans are much softer and quieter, reveling in the sounds of Clarke’s pleasure. Lexa is going slow, cherishing every moment of being inside Clarke.
Both of their orgasms are so close. Lexa moves faster and faster, the sound of hips meeting and wet skin slapping together fills the air. The bedpost starts to slam against the wall as Clarke’s moans reach an all time high. Lexa is grunting and panting out ‘I love you’ in one of Clarke’s cute little ears. They come together, with swollen lips and sweat beading down their bodies. Lexa pecks Clarke’s lips while the blonde’s eyes are shut and her smile is dreamy. Lexa carefully pulls out of the blonde. Lexa looks at the condom and sees a few specks of blood.
“I’ll be right back love.” Lexa kisses Clarke’s cheek tenderly and the blonde nods affectionately.
Lexa gets up and cleans herself off in the bathroom before returning with a warm wet towel and cleaning Clarke off as well. Once all is said and done, Lexa collapses on the bed next to Clarke.
“Hi.” Clarke cutely says and Lexa chuckles, caressing the blonde’s cheeks.
“Hi back.” Lexa says sweetly, her heart filled with such love.
“Mmm we just had sex.” Clarke says, her eyes fluttering closed.
“Yeah.” Lexa mumbles with a dumb smile on her face. “It was perfect. You’re perfect.”
Clarke smiles at her words and leans up a little to press a quick soft kiss to Lexa’s lips. And in this moment, everything is indeed perfect. Two girls head over heels in love, open and honest and baring their souls to one another. They’re in a love story like those of fairytales and fantasies. But what happens when reality seeps in?