Chapter 37
Bliss.
That was the phrase wasn't it?
The phrase people used nowadays to describe things.
Describe feelings.
A situation.
A happy situation.
A peaceful one.
A content one.
A state of feeling so happy at your current situation, the people you're with, how your life is going?
If this is what it is then I don't ever remember feeling this before in my life.
Ever.
This is a first.
As is this.
Looking down at the ring that adorned her left hand.
Brown eyes wandering over the way the different coloured diamonds sparkled as they caught the sun as Joan sat out in the back garden, a smile over her face, shaking her head at the turn of recent events.
Look at me.
Sat here in my garden.
Looking at a ring on my left hand.
My left hand.
On my ring finger.
My. Ring. Finger.
Given to me by Vera.
Vera gave me the ring.
A promise ring.
Wanted me to have it.
To wear it as a sign of her feelings for me.
What she feels for me.
That in itself is mad.
Pure madness.
Nice madness.
Unexpected madness.
Getting up from the chair, Joan made her way back inside, across the kitchen and upstairs, when she reached the bedroom door she quietly opened and then closed it, slipping her dressing gown off, her eyes on the figure before her, smiling at the sleeping Vera in their bed, the younger woman on her side facing away from her, silently moving underneath the duvet, spooning behind her, loving feeling the woman shuffle backwards into her arms, her breasts tight against the smaller woman's back.
Putting her face near Vera's hair, Joan inhaled the scent, the floral scent of Vera's shampoo, the scent she associated with her, the comforting scent, the scent she liked smelling on the other woman's pillow when Vera was on a earlier shift than her or she had come home after a night shift when Vera was just getting up, Joan taking Vera's place in bed and getting to put her head on Vera's pillow, feeling the other woman near her even though she'd heard the front door close and knew she'd just left for work, the scent a nice comfort when she was falling to sleep.
Joan squeezed Vera to her that bit more, her hands cupping her small breasts, gaining a murmur from the other woman, moving her palms over her nipples beginning to feel them hardened that bit more as she did, smiling to herself.
I know I should let her continue sleeping but I can't.
I just can't help myself.
I can't help slide in behind her and touch her.
Feel her skin against mine.
Feel her breasts in my hands.
The way her hips and body respond even when she sleeping or at the point of starting to wake up.
It's like her body knows it's me.
Knows it's me touching her.
Feeling her.
Caressing her.
Leaving one hand cradling Vera's breast, Joan trailed the other down her stomach, smiling as she felt the soft hair between the other woman's legs and then Vera's arousal as she moved lower and between her lips, tracing the length of her folds, groaning softly on feeling Vera's hips move into her hand and her arousal increase, knowing she was causing it. Waking that bit more, Vera shuffled tight back into Joan's body, her hips starting to move in time with the long fingers tracing her, loving the feel of being touched by the older woman, knowing that she knew exactly what she liked, how hard, how soft, how fast, how slow she liked it, knowing exactly what to do.
Fingers made their way in between Vera's folds, teasing her entrance and causing the woman in question to groan with the ache building between her legs, her head leaning back to Joan's shoulder, eyes still closed.
"P...Please.." she asked that bit more breathlessly than before, her need growing with every second and every touch on her.
"Please what hmm?" Joan whispered into her ear, lips brushing the shell as her fingers dipped just a little into Vera and then retracted, Vera groaning with want that bit louder, her hands gripping Joan's forearms.
"Joan...p...please.." her hips searching for that same contact again, feeling her clit start to pulse. "I...I need...need you...please" fingers tightening as they slid down towards Joan's wrist, her left hand trying to guide the older woman to where she needed her, not a want, a need.
Feeling Vera's hand Joan smiled, groaning herself at the increased arousal she felt on her fingers, easily sliding two fingers where Vera needed her, her thumb grazing the smaller woman's swollen clit, feeling her own arousal between her thighs on hearing the moan that left Vera's lips, pressing her breasts into Vera's back tight, squeezing the small breast in her right hand at the same time as moving and curling her fingers of her left hand to the sweet spot Vera craved, every so often when Vera wasn't expecting it she grazed her clit causing the body in her arms to jolt at the sensation, her breathing getting that bit more erratic.
There was something about being in this position, holding the woman she loved in her arms like this, something protective, something nicely possessive, being able to have full access to her body, having this intimate connection with her, between them both, getting to pleasure her and hear her pleasure close up, feel the way her hips bucked back into her causing her own groans of pleasure, the feel of Vera's bum tight against her front, the delicious friction of their skin together, a film of perspiration at their actions, the way Joan moulded at all the exact spots against Vera's smaller frame just like it was meant to have always been there, two parts of one jigsaw puzzle.
"Holding you, feeling you and seeing you like this is one of my favourite things, you feel so so good" Joan purred into Vera's ear, the tip of her tongue catching her lobe, gaining another groan from Vera, the smaller woman's hips now furiously undulating into Joan's hand, making her moan with pleasure that bit louder on feeling a dexterous thumb pressing harder in patterns on her clit, as skilful fingers brought her nearer to release, her walls closing that bit tighter with every passing moment, knowing she wouldn't be able to hold on much longer, her chest rising and falling fast as her lungs grabbed for oxygen.
Fuck me.
I am on fire for her.
My skin feels on fire.
Every single time she touches me.
Even a small touch and it happens.
I can't resist her touch.
I need it.
Crave it.
Melt at it.
Melt at her.
My body craves it.
My mind craves it.
Needs it.
Can't live without it.
She's my drug.
Joan Ferguson is my drug.
She's my drug and I'm addicted.
Totally hooked.
And I love it.
With another curl of Joan's fingers Vera felt her body tense and then go rigid as she came hard, her walls constricting around the long digits inside her, knuckles white with the force she was holding onto Joan's wrists with and the strength of her orgasm, being catapulted into another dimension, a heady feeling taking over, not aware of anything around her apart from her own pleasure, a euphoric fizzing feeling in her body, a tightening in her chest as her heart wrestled with not bursting through her ribs and landing with a thud next to her on the bed sheets, totally spent, her figure limp like a ragdoll in Joan's arms.
"Good morning" Joan murmured in Vera's ear, smiling as she did so.
After a few more minutes of calming her breathing that bit more Vera responded.
"Yes it is, cheeky" tapping Joan's forearm and then shuffling to turn over onto her back and then her side to look at the woman next to her, Joan with a wide smile on her face, her brown eyes sparkling happily.
"Me...never" Joan chuckled, seeing Vera smile back at her.
"Yes you, always you" Vera giggled snuggling into Joan's chest, breathing in the scent of the other woman's skin, such a clean and comforting smell she had, a Joan smell.
"Are you ok?" Joan asked, her arms wrapped back around Vera, kissing her hair.
Vera nodded. "I am, I'm more than ok now, that's my morning exercise done anyway" smiling against Joan's neck on hearing her chuckle.
"It's mine done too" she gave back quickly, Vera giggling again.
This woman.
She really did have an answer for anything.
No matter what it was she had an answer for it.
Some witty comment or come back.
Any subject or situation.
Any time.
She had it.
Joan Ferguson you smart arse.
You beautiful, beautiful smart arse woman.
My beautiful smart arse.
A beautiful arse too.
Oh that arse.
What an arse.
Fuck.
The best arse.
Ever.
Ever.
"Did you sleep?" Vera asked seen as Joan had obviously been awake earlier than her, something that Vera had quickly established would probably happen most of the time, apart from say if the older woman had been coming in off a night shift, then Vera was up and making coffee and breakfast before heading to work, greeting Joan with a hot drink or a small breakfast, saving her the trouble of making something when she was tired from her shift, liking the fact Joan allowed her to do these little things for her when she knew not many people got to do things for the governor, the woman being fiercely independent, or at least she had before Vera had appeared in her life, the last months allowing Vera to do things for her and actually enjoying having these things done for her, letting go of little areas of control in her life with a woman who she trusted more than anyone else before, something she found to be nice and pleasant, also seeing Vera's reaction to how she enjoyed the little things the younger woman did for her making her heart swell and her smile wide, the pure joy on Vera's face, the smile she gave Joan at seeing the older woman's enjoyment, kissing her goodbye and letting her know she'd text her later, that she'd miss her whilst she was at work, Joan managing to let Vera know she'd also miss her before the small figure was disappearing out of the front door, the rev of the engine moving into the distance letting Joan know she'd left.
"I did thank you yes, just woke earlier and decided to sit outside in the garden for a little while, take in the early morning peace, it's lovely and mild out there" Joan replied, her sleep having improved considerably since Vera had moved in, it being a complete mess before hand, not able to get that many good night's sleep, never fully feeling rested. But now, now with the other woman in their house, in their bed she slept, she slept so soundly, so peacefully, awakening to see the beautiful face of Vera beside her, sometimes asleep, sometimes looking back at her, it was as if her body and mind knew even in sleep that the woman she loved was right beside her and she wasn't going anywhere, that she was here to stay, that nothing bad would happen to Joan, this allowed the older woman to fall asleep and rest peacefully, probably for the first time in that many years she'd forgotten what it felt like, what it felt like not to go to bed carrying that tension, that fear, that pain.
"I've been thinking" Joan added as Vera moved her head off her shoulder to look at her. "I've been thinking maybe......maybe you'd like to get a ring, for me to get you one I mean..." and she had been thinking about it, rather a lot, ever since Vera had given her hers, the ring Joan hadn't taken off since she'd had it put on her finger, not wanting to take it off, it being important that it be kept in the same spot that Vera had put it in and given it to her, a symbol of love from Vera to Joan.
Vera beamed at the suggestion, her heart fluttering at the thought.
"A ring....for me, like...like the one I got for you?" Vera asked, her smile widening as she spoke, eyes with Joan's.
"Yes" Joan nodded, seeing the lit up face in front of her.
"Yes...yes I'd really like that, I'd have one to wear then too" Joan unable to stop the smile on her own face at Vera's reaction, the way her face lit up brightly at the thought of having her own ring to wear, that then they'd both have one on their left hand as a symbol that they were 'properly' together, of what they meant to each other, but the main thing being that it was Joan who'd have bought it for her and given it to her, no one else in this world would she want this kind of gift and symbol off than the woman in whose arms she currently lay, the woman she'd wanted and loved for so long, the woman she never thought she'd ever get a look from in that way, let alone get a ring off, the woman who made her complete, the woman who had stolen her heart, who was giving her everything she ever wanted, the one woman whose arms felt like home.
"Then that's what we'll do, we'll go out together and you shall pick whatever ring you want and I'll buy it for you, whichever one, you can have anyone you like, ok?" brown eyes not moving from the blue ones mere millimetres from her own, the eyes she could easily get lost in, Vera closing the gap between them to share a tender kiss.
Vera nodded as she pulled back to look at Joan. "Ok, did I mention that I love you, I love you so much" cupping one of Joan's cheeks with her hand, gazing at her, Joan's arms tightening around her body as if they were one.
"Not nearly as much as I love you, not nearly as much" Joan replied stroking her thumbs soothing against the small of Vera's back, and it was true, the amount of love Joan felt for Vera she couldn't explain, she didn't have the words, couldn't find the words, feeling that no amount of words could do justice to how Vera made her feel inside, how she made her heart feel, that organ that had been locked up tight in its ice prison for as long as Joan could remember, now felt like bursting with love it had in it for the woman led in her arms, the woman she wanted to see wear a ring that was a small symbol of this love that she had for her.