Chapter 22
Paperwork.
Loads of it.
Such an annoyance.
I must spend half of my working week doing it.
Or should that be life.
Life definitely.
Even on her day off she had work at home with her.
Sat at the dining table, papers surrounding her laptop, in their own piles, organised into what was what.
There's got to be a way to make this system work better, I thought we were in the technological age, the age that saved all this, obviously not.
Putting her pen down Joan opened up the search window, her hands hovering over the keys, deliberating whether type it or not, sighing she let her fingers type out the words, scoffing to herself as she did.
How to woo a lady.
Then hit the search button, her screen filling with the various results, there were loads of them, pages.
Immediately closing the lid of the laptop, her hand resting on the top.
This is ridiculous.
What am I even doing?
Why am I even looking?
What's the point?
The one and only reason.
Vera.
That was the point.
She was reason.
She was cause.
Sighing deeply she opened the lid again, the screen flickering back to life, clicking on the first link that looked like it might be remotely helpful.
Her eyes scanned the page as she scrolled, taking in the information in front of her.
Remind her of you.
Spend time with her.
Compliments and charm.
Flowers or gifts.
Text her.
Offer your help.
Be available.
"What do some of these even mean?" frowning at some of the titles, clicking on the links to expand the explanation. Her fingertips traced her bottom lip as she read, brow furrowing a little in concentration.
Ok I understand that part and that one.
Surely you don't need to do all these things, a few will suffice.
Flowers I've done.
Spend time with her, yes, a few times.
Maybe more of that?
But what kind of thing to do.
She seems to enjoy going out for food, but what else, something other people and her might consider to be fun.
Fun.
Now comes the difficult bit, deciding what might be fun.
Do I know of such a concept?
Do I even understand the idea of it?
Or what might be agreeable to Vera.
What she might like to do, where to go?
Think Joan think. What would Vera like.
What would she enjoy and find fun.
Hmm. Think. Think. Think.
Food? But not a meal out like before.
Picnic. Beach picnic. Beach picnic together?
That could work.
Now to ask her.
Text her? Phone her?
Back to the page she looked, her eyes scanning the search results and spotting the word texting, how women like to be texted by the other party, the 'wooer'.
With her phone open to write a message she took a pause, the cogs in her mind thinking about how she could word the offer to Vera, since she'd never asked anyone on this before, on a...date. Joan Ferguson was about to ask another woman out on another date.
An actual date she'd planned.
Her, herself.
I just wondered if you'd be interested in coming out with me on Sunday afternoon, I took the liberty of checking your shift on the rota and saw that you've a half day and I'm not working this weekend, so I thought it'd make it more appropriate for you in general. Please let me know. Joan.
With her phone back on the table she closed the windows of her search down, not thinking they'd be needed anymore seen as she had a plan, a plan she hoped Vera would like too, back to paperwork she returned, only writing a few words and her phone signalled a message.
From Vera.
I'd be more than interested, yes please, I'd be delighted to come out with you. Looking forward to it :)
Joan couldn't help but smile to herself on the reply, typing back almost instantly.
Thank you, I'll pick you up at 1:30pm from your house. Joan.
Pulling up outside the house the next day Joan pressed lightly on the horn signalling her arrival, watching almost instantly the front door opening and Vera stepping out, hair loose on her shoulders, a thin strapped summer dress and sandals on, carrying a matching bag, appropriate for the warm day it was, not a cloud appearing in the sky.
Arriving at the destination Joan had chosen, the dark Lexus pulling into a patch of gravel that doubled up as a makeshift car park, a little parting of the bushes near to where they were parked, which seemed to have a path in the middle of it.
"Shall we?" Joan offered, getting out of the car and moving to the boot, the younger woman following, watching the retrieval of a rather large wicker picnic hamper with a handle, glancing to Vera on feeling the eyes of the other woman on the basket. "Erm..this is part of the day" letting Vera walk onto the path first.
On reaching the end of the clearing, the view opened out onto the sea and a little beach just below them, a path showing the way down, sand dunes offering some shelter and privacy, a single bench just further round over looking the other side of the bay, the afternoon sun beaming down, reflections all over the sea.
"I thought we...that we could have a picnic on the beach, erm....just you and I, hence this" motioning to the basket.
"This beach is so lovely, the whole place is, it's such a brilliant idea Joan" the older woman dipping her head shyly at the compliment.
"Thank you" she mumbled quietly, leading Vera down onto the beach, setting the basket on the blanket she'd laid out, then picking a bottle of sun cream from the basket, looking to Vera who was already sat on said blanket.
"What's that for?" Vera frowned seeing the bottle, she'd not even given a thought to sun cream, let alone bringing any along. Joan arched her eyebrow at the question. "I thought that might have been obvious. The sun is shining without a cloud in the sky, it's a rather warm day and you're wearing a dress that the sun could easily burn you in, therefore sun cream is needed" explaining what to her seemed a more than obvious answer, seems Vera though sun cream in the warm sun irrelevant.
"I don't often put sun cream on, don't feel that I need it" taking in her lightly tanned forearms and then back at Joan.
"You can still burn with a tan and I think caution is always better taken, especially in the sun" showing Vera the bottle again, watching the younger woman's reaction, Vera attempting to reason again, but Joan interrupting. "I wouldn't want...want your skin to get burnt that's all, but..." moving to put the bottle back in the basket, this being stopped by Vera's hand over her own. "You'll put some on too?" she asked, her eyes with Joan's.
The older woman nodded yes.
With a smile Vera slid the straps of her dress off her shoulders and moved her hair round to the side of her neck, her shoulders and back exposed, glancing back to Joan.
Joan looked at Vera then back to the bottle in her hand, her brain then remembering what she was doing, squeezed some of the cream onto her fingers, dividing it between both hands, gently placing them on Vera's shoulders and working the cream over the bare skin, making sure all the area was covered, the excess on her hands she wiped onto a nearby towel. "Thank you" Vera smiled, turning to face Joan, picking up and squeezing some cream onto her fingers, watching and waiting as the older woman took her time to slightly nervously push the straps of her vest top off her shoulders, her hair being moved and then looking to Vera.
Gently the younger woman massaged the cream into the fair skin of Joan's back and shoulders, the muscles under her hands relaxing at touch, relieving some of the tension they held.
Her skin is so soft under my hands.
It's like silk and so fair and flawless.
Similar to that face of hers.
With Joan laying out the food and drink she'd prepared for them, they both took turns in eating and drinking their way through it, Vera mumbling through a slightly full mouth at how delicious it was, the dark haired woman's cheeks blushing as she thanked her, glad that Vera was enjoying it, seeing as she herself had never done anything remotely like this before.
Silence after their food at first, both of them content to sit side by side, looking out at the sea, happy just enjoying the view and company, Joan glancing to the woman beside her out of the corner of her eye, watching the way her pretty face glowed that bit more when she was relaxed, her sea blue eyes shining even more when the sun caught them. She's so beautiful and looks adorable in her summer dress.
So pretty.
And she's here with me.
By my side.
On a dare I say it...date with me.
Another one.
Jeez.
After a few more minutes of silence Joan swallowed the nerves in her throat, flexing and curling her fingers, if she'd glanced to Vera once, she'd done it a thousand times, preparing herself, steadily herself, wanting to get the words out in one go and not stammer, for it to be clear, to be sure.
Come on Joan.
It's two words.
No one else is around.
Just you and her.
She's here with you because she wants to be.
Say it.
Ask it.
Ask her.
"Come here?" Joan muttered softly, looking to the woman beside her, parting her legs so there was a space between them.
Vera turned at the request, looking down at the space Joan had created, flashing the older woman a knowing smile on shuffling over and sitting in the newly made space in front of Joan, this smile widening when the gap behind was evaporated by the front of Joan touching her back, pulling the arms of the woman behind her tighter around her on feeling them snake around her waist, murmuring at the sensation.
"This is nice" Vera commented leaning back into the embrace, resting her head back on Joan's shoulder, feeling Joan rest her cheek against her hair.
"It is" she replied, the softness of Vera's hair amplified against the sensitive skin of her own cheek, breathing in the scent of her shampoo and closing her eyes.
"I've not been to the beach in years, it's been that long I can't remember the exact time I was last at one. I used to go to the beach quite a bit when I was a little girl, there wasn't a lot of money in our house to allow for treats and so on, so taking a trip to the beach was the next best thing, it wasn't that far from our house and we'd spend all day there and we'd have such a lovely time, building sandcastles, splashing and swimming in the sea, we'd get ice creams too" smiling to herself at the memories, looking out at the vast sea in front of her.
Listening to what was being said, Joan was silent for a few minutes afterwards, her mind wrestling with itself, toying with what she should say next and if she should actually say what was on the tip of her tongue, deciding after a short while it was safe enough and with the right person to do so.
"I...I never visited the beach as a child, I..I erm...wasn't allowed" she admitted, having never spoken of anything to do with her childhood before.
On hearing the admittance Vera squeezed the larger hands under hers reassuringly, knowing that for Joan to admit anything of a personal nature was something she never did lightly and took a lot more courage than the average person.
"But you would have liked to hmm?" was the gentle question, wanting to know more but not forcing Joan to talk if she didn't feel comfortable enough to. She felt the breathing of Joan quickening as the woman behind her considered the question put to her for a few moments.
Joan nodded against Vera's hair.
"Yes, I....I'd....I'd watch other small children my age on my street through my bedroom window in summer, getting into cars with their parents, with buckets and spades and things, obviously off to the beach for the day, when I asked my father why we couldn't do what the other children did he said...." stumbling over her words, the memory of the past bringing a painful lump to her throat, the squeeze of Vera's hands over her own comforting and helping her to carry on speaking. "He said...said that I didn't deserve to go to the beach, that he didn't want to take me there, that he didn't want to spend time with me, that...that I was a nuisance to him" her voice quivering and starting to break. Vera's heart dropped on hearing Joan speak, wishing she could take all the pain this woman must have endured as a child away from her.
How could he treat her this way she was just a little girl.
An innocent little girl.
She must have felt so alone and unloved.
Her own father calling her a nuisance.
Half turning her head Vera looked up into the emotional and shining brown eyes meeting hers, freeing one of her hands to cup Joan's cheek, brushing the skin with her thumb. "I'm sorry that you had to go through that, you shouldn't have ever have had to. I've loved every minute of being here with you, every single second, there's nowhere I'd rather be and definitely not with anyone else, just you. How about we come here together again, or maybe find other new beaches like this too, together?" her face curving into a smile with the nod of Joan, the pad of her thumb gently wiping away a stray tear that escaped and slid down the fair skinned cheek of the governor.
"It's ok. For the record, I enjoy spending time with you rather a lot, and I like being close like this with you, a big lot actually. I'm very fond of you Joan, in case I'd not made that clear before" giving a shy giggle at how she must sound, her heart lifting on hearing a gentle chuckle from Joan, the brown eyes creasing at the sides as she smiled.
Not waiting for permission, Vera leaned up to capture the older woman's lips in a long, deep kiss, pouring her feelings into it, Joan holding the younger woman close to her as they kissed, her own heart lifting and fluttering on the closeness between them.
She seems to have such an effect on me.
A calming effect.
Makes me feel validated.
Not stupid.
Not belittled.
Safe.
I feel wanted.
Wanted by her.
Regaining her position behind Vera, Joan held her flush against her chest like they were one, kissing Vera's temple, resting her head against the one next to hers, looking out to the sea in front of them, smiling at how they were together.
"I'm fond of you too" she whispered.