Beyond The Past

Beyond The Past

Chapter 10 – Memories Slowly Killing Pepoles, Aka Dirty Secrets

A/N: I dont own Resident Evil. I own Kira. May contains incest. Father/Daughter thing.

I was in my brain, all the way.

I barely could breath, how in the hell I could tell my girlfriend that I'm hiding everything away from her. The fact I'm not who I am, or something else…

I felt my head. And it hurted me. Pounded deeply.

As Claire stopped by, and didn't turned to me, she went to the door, and opened it. I tried to look at her, but it was all in blur. Literally, everything.

„Kira, is everything okay?" Claire asked, looking at me. As she noticed me, finding a way to stand, she runned back to me, but it was all for nothing.

I fell down to the ground, and hited my head bad.

I can't lose it now. What's happenning now?

2012. April. 27th – Sixteenth Birthday

The day what every teenage waits for. Hitting sixteen.

I was happy. Really happy.

As I woked up, I lighted up a special cigarette. It was filled with the anti-serum of the virus. Also, smoking helped me killing the virus. So it helped. Literally, taking anti-virus, smoking, and smoking anti-virus could kill the virus whole in my blood, but I taked back taking anti-viruses, to once a week, from daily. Smoking anti-virus maked it better. Filling my need in smoking.

Never imagined, staying here.

Sixteen, and smoking in bed. No one catched me. As I thought.

I opened the window, even to let the bad air out, and it didn't went that well. I just stood up, got into my slippers, then rubbed my eyes, holding my cigarette. Stood infront of the opened window, looking at myself.

Messy blonde-brown hair, red-yellow eyes, and old S.T.A.R.S tshirt. Just stoled from dad. Dad… If you would know how I feel, please…

„You shouldn't smoke in your room" I heard a voice behind me. It was my aunt. Standing in my door.

„I thought you were dad, for a minute" I laughed, then I taked my last breath from the cigarette. I walked to her, and pulled me into a big hug.

„Oh god, am I that horrible?" She asked, and I answered with a laugh.

„No, you're not. You're the best in the world I could ever image!" I told her.

„You should hide your cigarette box away, if your father would try to get into your room, and if he sees that, I don't know what would he do with you" She laughed, pointing at the box, what layed next to my bed, on the coffee table.

„I'm running out of it, I could throw it to the trash" I sighed, grabbing the box, and putted it under the bed. Good place to hide, give me credit.

„How do you even make these things? You shouldn't supposed to get it"

„Internet, Alex. It helps. You can order stuffs from here. And when they've sended it, it didn't showed on the box, and I told my dad I've ordered some outfit. He get that" I smiled.

Yeah. I wish I could ordered that hot dress, what I saw last time, when I've surfed around the internet wonderful world. I could fit into that dress perfectly, then I could use my charm.

Yeah, again. This is the last thing what I never told to anyone. I'm having strong feelings, for my father.

It started when I was fifteen. When I've decided to stop this virus in me. One time it happenned, I looked at him with a different eye, and it seemed to be amazing… And it happenned.

I didn't mentoid it to Alex. She would hate me. I hate myself enough, to admit I'm a disgusting animal. She noticed me, looking better for someone. Maybe she thinked of that, but never told me, so I couldn't know what her mind raced to.

„So, tell me" She sighed. „Why are you soo strange lately?"

„I don't know. I'm stressed out these days, or usually when I can't smoke. I just can't tell it to dad. He would kill me"

„Why would he kill his only positive power? Maybe you should try to tell it to him. Maybe he would understand. Tell him you do it for killing the virus. It would make it better" She explained. Maybe she has something.

I'm telling it to him, today. After my birthday celebrating.

As Alex leaved my room, I got my S.T.A.R.S tshirt off, and grabbed the dress I puted out yesterday. A black little dress, what fitted me perfectly. I grabbed some pretty girlish shoe, like high heels, but not that high heel.

As I looked into the mirror, I felt like a girl. A pretty girl. And this was even without make-up!

I got the mascara in my hands, and puted up some, when my door got opened. I turned around, and I was really happy to see my father.

„Why are you dressed like you're going out with your boyfriend?" He asked, looking at me.

„I don't have a boyfriend, still" I sighed.

„I don't understand, because I think boys would die for you" I blushed deep, as he told it to me.

„You think they would die for me?" I asked while fighting with my breath.

I turned away from my mirror. I've putted down my mascara, then I walked over my bedroom, to the door, where he stood, looking at me. I guess it was time for revailing the truth. But not the acceptable. The hurtable truth, what kills me, everyday I look into his eyes…

„There's already one, who's dying for you…" He whispered to me. The air stucked in my lungs, and I couldn't take anymore. I got my eyes wide opened, as I noticed what's going on. He just… Admitted his attraction to me?

We stared at eachother. Neither of us could say a word. I bited my lip, and looked down. My head were full of everything. I was confused. I don't knowed what to do?

But it didn't needed any continue, or my way to think about it. As I met his eyes again, he leaned to me, and stoled my first kiss…

My first kiss… Slow, beautiful, and full of meaning…

Present

I woked up with my head, hurting the hell out of me. I just can't handle the fact I've dated with my own father. This memory kept running around me. Claire looked at me, with her sad face. I thought I did something bad, but she didn't speaked. I don't even know why in the freaking hell I'm still here…?

This must've gone worster.