Chapter 2
After that night in Kara's apartment, everything actually turned upside down. Veronica was finally able to see Lena's worth. Lena and Veronica officially dated exclusively. She can now feel that Veronica really does love her. She thinks she's happy. Her relationship is steady. But the one person she wants to tell about this is missing. The day Veronica asked her to be her girlfriend, Lena almost spoke to Kara. Back then, she typed Kara's number only to remember they were not on speaking terms. She can't help but feel a sting in her heart. She thinks she was supposed to be happy, right? She now has everything she had always wanted - Veronica's love. So why wasn't it enough?
She sees Kara's photo's in Instagram. Kara always post photos with cheesy captions thanking her friends, saying she couldn't imagine life without them. Especially with this one girl, Lucy Lane. Kara seems to have lots of dorky and silly photos with her accompanied my cheesy captions. She's always out with her friends. They seem to always go to some epic adventure. They go to the mountains, beaches, lakes, and even to another country this one particular weekend. they go snorkeling, hiking, cliff diving. Kara seems to always be away from the city and enjoys her life. Kara seems to be free. Something that Lena didn't get to see before.
So when Veronica and Lena have their first fight after 3 months and a half, she doesn't go to Kara. She has no right. So she deals with her pain by herself.
"Bab, bart, bartender! One mmore please" Lena slurs her speech as she puts another shot of tequila down.
"I don't think so. Miss Luthor." The bartender says.
"Isn't it your job to make me more drinks?! Lena pokes him. "Do your goddamn job!"
The Bartender sighs and gives Lena another shot of tequila. "Okay what is it? Is it about Love?"
Lena chuckles, sarcastically. "Hm. Loveeeeeeee. Tell me mr. Bartender, do you believe in lollove?"
"I dont know. Do you?"
Lena takes her shot of tequila. She winces at the taste.
"Oh, please. It's my most elaborate method of self harm." She whispers as a tear falls from her eyes.
Lena's head throb. She had way too much to drink. She knows she shouldn't call Kara. Not when she hasn't called her once for 3 months and a half. Not when Kara seems to be happy without her. But with the alcohol clouding her judgement and hazing her memory, she turns to what's familiar. She does what she always does. She calls Kara.
Kara was with her friends when her phone rings at 2 am. It was Lena.
Kara's heart starts to beat faster and faster as she looks at her phone. 3 and half months, radio silence. 3 and half months after and she calls? She asks herself what does Lena want. She can see the tabloids and even their mutual friends mention it to Kara that finally Veronica is changing and doing everything she can for Lena. So why is Lena calling her at 2 am like she used to?
Kara breathes and calms herself before answering.
Kara doesn't say a word as she waits for Lena to speak first.
"Kara! Oh my gosh you totally have to get me" She hears Lena giggle. "I'm at this bar we always go to. Kaaaraaa. It's Veronica. She's-"
"Lena, stop. Not my job anymore. I can't. I won't pick you up."
Kara ends the call and immediately texts Alex.
Alex
Alex, I know it's really late. But can you pick Lena up? She sounds really drunk. Doesn't even remember we had a falling out. Please? I wouldn't ask if it's not an emergency.
Kara's phone rings again. It was Mike.
"Mike?"
"Kara! Sorry but you know that friend you always bring here, Ms. Luthor? Well, she's really drunk and this guy keeps on hitting on her. I couldn't do anything since Ms. Luthor doesn't mind."
"I'm on my way."
Alex
I'm on my way there too. See you @ Mike's Bar.
Kara arrives at the bar and sees Lena. And it's like her efforts of moving on for the past 3 months have gone to waste. Kara dragged herself out of her room every morning after crying and self wallowing the night before.
For the past 3 and a half months, Kara went to go soul searching. her friends dragged her out of the city to help her forget Lena. They went hiking but all she remembered was how She and Lena watch the movie 127 Hours. They went to the beach but all she remembered was how she and Lena played frisbee at the Luthor's beach house with Lena's golden retriever back in college. They went snorkeling but all she remembered was the aquarium in Lena's penthouse. They went to Lucy's lake house but all she remembered was that party by the lake She and Lena got invited to for the first time in high school. They went to Japan but all she remembered are the treats and souvenir Lena brought for her when she came back from a business trip in Asia. They went camping but all she remembered was the time they put up a tent at Kara's backyard in Midvale and built a bonfire and made smores.
Kara was happy and thankful her friends were there or else she would have never stopped thinking about Lena on every trip. She created new memories with her friends and really had a great time with them. But in between all those laughters and experiences they had, Lena still lingered her mind from time to time. Slowly though, she stopped. She somehow was able to stop thinking about her and probably had managed to move on from her.
Tears still fall every time she remembers Lena but not to the point that would make her eyes puffy. She told herself that she should really move on accept things for what they are. And she did.
Or she thought she did. But now she sees Lena and her heart beat is rising rapidly. She's looking at Lena and it's like the past 3 months and a half never happened at all. Like she's back there that night at her apartment, feeling so in love and badly hurt at the same time, her world crashing and torn into pieces. And she honestly doesn't know what's worst. She just knows that she is feeling everything all at once at that moment.
Kara couldn't stop herself from shaking her head in disbelief. How could she put herself in this situation again? She heads over to where Lena is as she wonders what Veronica did. Because again, it always comes down to to Veronica
"Get your hands off her" Kara says to the man beside Lena.
"And who are you" the man asks.
Kara didn't really know how to answer that. She evens asks herself why she is here right now. Who is she to Lena, anyways.
"Doesn't matter. My sister is an FBI agent and she'll be here any minute to pick us up. I suggest you leave before that happens."
The man leaves but not before giving them a hateful look.
Kara nods at Mike. "Thanks for calling me, Mike."
"No problem." He looks at Lena "sounds like matters of the heart, Kara"
Kara stares at Lena who is now passed out drunk at the counter. She moves the hair off covering Lena's face as she sighs.
"It always is."
Lena tried to open her eyes and say something. Kara rubs Lena's back to soothe her.
"Sssh. Sokay. I got you" Kara whispers. " i got you"
Alex arrived shortly after. They were supposed to take Lena to Kara's apartment but Kara said to drive them to Lena's penthouse instead. Kara still has the key Lena gave her for emergency use. Alex helped Kara carry Lena to her bed. Alex was hesitant to leave Her at first knowing what happened between them but kara assures her she's okay and thank her before she leaves.
Kara wets the face towel on a tub of water beside her. She cleans Lena's face with it and her arms. She changes Lena into her Pajamas.
Lena feels this and starts to open her eyes. Lena stares at Kara like she couldn't believe that Kara was there.
"Ka, kara?" Seeing Kara infront of her, Tears start to fall from Lena's eyes. Lena pulls Kara for a tight hug "Gosh Kara. imm sorry... I-"
"Shhh, ssshh. Im here" Kara tries to stop Lena from crying. She wipes Lena's tears away and rubs Lena's forehead gently. "It's okay. Go back to sleep, Lena. Rest up."
Lena closes her eyes. Lena was still clinging to Kara. Kara didn't pull away. She continues hugging Lena in her arms and rubs Lena's forehead as she hums.
Kara wanted to get out from there. Everything just hurts inside. She is hurting because even though Lena stayed with Veronica, she thought that Lena was done with this. That Veronica didn't hurt her like this anymore. She is hurting because she finds herself in this position once again. She finds herself wishing that it would be her instead of Veronica. That it would be her that Lena would choose. And she hated herself for wishing that because she knows it will never happen but she still hopes. And she hated hoping because in reality, hoping is the worst. It just prolongs the pain, the ache, the inevitable.
When She was sure Lena was sound asleep, Kara stares at Lena in her arms once more, taking it all in. Tears start falling from her eyes. She bites her lip to stop them as smiles sadly, her heart wanting so much that her head knows is never going to happen.
Her parents had warned Kara about the drugs in the street but never the ones with green eyes and a heart beat. Because at this very moment, that's what Lena surely feels like. Something you know that could destroy you yet you still go back and back for it, something you can't stay away from, wanting for so much more.
Kara carefully pulls away from Lena. She stands and tucks the comforter above Lena.
She puts a glass of water on the bedside table and some medicines for the hangover Lena would get when she wakes up.
Before she leaves, She stares at Lena once more, her heart aching of loving someone who unquestionably isn't in love with her. And that... feels like a whole new level of self destruction.
Though not totally but Kara and Lena are somehow in the same predicament. Their falling out was all about Kara calling out Lena's inability to stop loving someone who kept on her hurting her. Ironically, that's what Kara was doing too. Kara knows this.
But the difference is Lena, given the choice, wouldn't hurt Kara, not the way Veronica does. The difference is Kara knows when enough is enough. Kara knows she is doing something about it. She may have been there for Lena tonight but she wouldn't let this or the emotions she felt tonight get in the way of what she was trying to do for the past 3 months and a half. Not when it took a lot of effort and hard work not just from her but from her friends too to put all of Kara's broken pieces back together, to put her life back on track. Not after what Lena had said to her. Not when she didn't hear a single word from Lena after that.
So she texts Alex...
Alex
Please don't tell Lena anything about this night. She might not remember it so...
I wasn't here. You weren't here. We both weren't here.