Trying to Understand
In the morning Levi carried Eren to his jeep that the retrieval team brought for him. Usually Levi like to drive back from missions by himself the morning after a mission to de-stress but this particular morning and after this particular mission he had to take care of precious cargo. Ymir, the snake girl, was riding with the rest of the special ops squad. Hanji left the night before to make sure they would have everything ready for the new arrivals and to fill in the commander for the shit storm they were bringing him. Levi had already been making plans all morning for the safety of both of the teams new charges but especially Eren, he would need the most protection for awhile especially with all the ignorant soldiers on the base whom Levi knew would try something. He had decided that it was going to be better to have the female cadets look after Eren when he could not. His half sister Mikasa was a definite, maybe Sasha and Krista. The brat would be with Hanji for awhile and Levi knew that for as crazy as Hanji was they could hold their own against the best of the scouts except for Levi and Mikasa themselves, the Ackerman siblings were monsters in the eyes of many. Maybe he could convince Erwin to let Armin come in and be the kids emotional support, they were about the same age as Mikasa and he wasn't a solider. Hopefully once Eren was all healed up he could protect himself unless something like sickness or pregnancy came into the equation. Levi didn't want to have to babysit Eren, he wanted to give the kid his freedom but he also had to keep him safe. When it came to the issue with the rooms Levi figured that Ymir would be alright with the rest of the females but Eren could not stay with the rest of the male cadets for his safety and the safety of the soldiers around him. Levi had accepted the fact that he was abnormally protective of the kid and with the discussion of pheromones with Hanji he knew it wasn't going away. He knew the kid was subconsciously choosing Levi as his mate and Levi never stood a chance, Hanji told him not to fight it but this was foreign territory to Levi and it made him uncomfortable and being from the underground being uncomfortable made Levi even more dangerous to those around him and the kid. Levi was damn near feral still to begin with and this kid was bringing it out of him in ways he had only scratched the surface for with protecting his family. Eren would probably get one of the converted bedrooms on the first floor of the dungeon area. It was probably for the best so Eren can lock himself away if he wanted. Once he was healthy enough to defend himself they would talk about a more private and permanent room weather it was his own room or if he at that point would prefer rooming with Levi himself. Though to room with Levi was them both agreeing to pursue what was happening before them. That would be the equivalent of moving into ones significant other's apartment or house, that would be Levi sharing his space and Levi only did that with the people he chose to spend the rest of his life with such as the family he had lost. The thought of sharing his lodgings with the boy sleeping next to him made Levi feel somehow lighter and it gave him hope, something he had not had in many years. Levi was not going to win against such temptation that came in the form of a teal eyes wolf boy if the brat was armed with the ability to bring hope into Levi's life.
Eren sat slumped against Levi still completely dead to the world, he had only woken up long enough for Levi to get some food in him and some clothes on him. The clothes were not much nor did they fit well but they covered him at the very least. Levi was planning on getting him a full wardrobe after getting his measurements from Hanji. He could afford to buy the brat a wardrobe, or 18 of them. At least this would give Levi an excuse to spend the money he had accidentally saved up, He never spent money on himself unless it was cleaning products, tea or something he needed. Though Levi had to keep in mind that Eren's size was most likely going to change as he gets healthier. Levi hadn't gotten to spoil anyone since Izzy and Farlan died all those years ago and back then he didn't have the money to do so as he pleased, he will change that this time around and this kid deserved to be spoiled.
The idea of spoiling the kid lead to the idea of spoiling their kid and what their kid would like like in Levi's fantasies. The thoughts lead to a black haired child with turquoise eyes and a tiny tail. The images took Levi's breath away from him. Levi will admit to never being in love before and he knew that he was terrible with any emotion outside of apathy or anger. Izzy and Farlan had been in love and it was a strange thing to be caught in the middle of though he was sure it was not as strange as a pheromone induced nose dive. He wondered if this was something he would have felt if Eren had not been tortured and experimented on, though that would have meant he and Levi never would have met so it would not have mattered. Maybe Glasses was right and this was the universe telling him to go for it. Sudden pained groans pulled Levi from his musing and he took his eyes from the road in front of the car briefly to check the boy the noise came from. As soon as Levi saw the mass amount of pain in the sleeping boy's face he quickly pulled off to the side of the still dirt road. They were in the middle of jungle still with no one around, Levi tended to take the scenic route at a faster speed then others. Once the car was safely stopped he reached over to unbuckle Eren and gently shake him awake.
“Brat what is wrong?” Levi's voice was gentle and full of concern, a concern that deepened when Eren's eyes opened and were clouded with pain.
“I am sorry Levi I didn't mean to bother you.” Eren's voice was strained with pain but somehow he was still more concerned about being a burden to Levi, they had a long conversation about it the night before hell Levi finally got him to call him by his first name.
“How many times am I going to have to tell you that you are not a burden kid, I accepted your terms easily and on my own accord. Now what is wrong? I can not be responsible for you and have you kept things from me at the same time. What can I do to help you?”
“Please don't worry about it, it will pass.”
“Then what is the problem?”
“If you truly want to know, I apparently was fertile last night and I am paying for it now.” Eren said without really thinking of anything but embarrassment, he was still not comfortable with Levi knowing about his condition. Eren didn't notice the fact that his words stopped Levi in his tracks, he was caught completely off guard. A feeling of disappointment and loss swelled through Levi in a way he had never felt before, it was nearly crippling. All that kept coming to mind was that he had lost a chance to have a child, maybe this was a similar feeling to when his mother lost his little sibling while he was younger. “Levi are you alright? You just lost all color to your skin.”
“It's nothing, I don't know.” Levi spoke in honestly, he had no idea what was wrong, this was completely primal feeling in him that he had no knowledge of.
“Levi you can not tell me that I can not keep things from you while you do just that. I need to be able to trust you Levi, that is the position I am in but if you will not be honest with me I can not trust you and therefore can not be honest with you. I have spent to long in the dark surrounded by lies and silence please let me have someone to latch on to and trust. Please let me in Levi. I need this.”
“First of all Eren I have not been completely open and honest with anyone in a long time and if that is what you are asking from me it will take a while to get to that but I will try because I promised to take care of you and you are right you need someone. Second I am always honest unless the situation calls for dishonesty. Those who I am actually close with I refuse to lie to, you never have to worry about that. I was telling you the truth Eren, I have no idea what is going on with me. I asked for advice on emotions twice yesterday and thats two things I do not do; ask for advice or do anything involving emotions. I am completely out of my element and you will have to bare with me.”
“Then talk it out to me, describe it. Maybe we can work it out together. I know Hanji explained to me that I have pheromones that have affects on men that can cause me harm but the way they are effecting you is more primal and more animalistic but not in a way that could hurt me, only others. I need to trust you Levi. You are all I have ever had to trust. I do not feel comfortable with anyone but you, something about you calms me, the Doctor lady said it was the pheromones your body was producing in response to mine. Something akin to mates with animals. I really do not feel comfortable with anyone else not even those women you placed me with yesterday. The Doctor and the red head were nice to me but I could only calm down with you around, only then I feel safe.
“I am sorry I left you alone, I didn't know the extent that you needed me even now. I will try not to leave you alone unless I have to or I feel as though it would be dangerous for me to be by your side.”
“Thank you Levi. Though I want to know what upset you?”
“You in pain and the reason behind it. Something about you losing that possible child hurts me a lot. I can't really describe it in words. I don't really understand why you are having such a hold on me so quickly pheromones or not.”
“Since when does emotion follow a set schedule or a pattern. I have been asking myself questions like that for a long time and I had never actually met you before. Nothing about the situation we are in is considered a normal,we have to figure this out on our own but together non the less.” Eren put his hand over Levi's and looked at him with such understanding. Levi knew he never stood a chance.