Overworked

Catra is getting sick and tired of the disapproving looks that Adora's been sending her way lately. So what if she’s been working a lot? There’s a lot to do! Hell, Sparkles won’t let them forget that there’s a lot to do: reconstructing Salineas, fixing up the smaller towns that were destroyed, turning the Fright Zone into a suitable place for Scorpia to rule, and eradicating any Horde sympathizers who didn’t get the memo that the war is over.

And besides, a fair amount of the work that they have to do is thanks to Catra, so it’s only right that she puts as much energy into fixing Etheria as she did destroying it. Adora is a real hypocrite if she of all people is judging Catra for working too hard to help others.

Catra has settled into a routine now, anyway, which is something that Perfuma says will help her manage some of her anxieties. She wakes up to eat breakfast with Adora, Sparkles (she knows her name is Glimmer, but some habits die hard), and Arrow Boy (see note about Glimmer’s name), and then heads out to work on whatever needs to be done. Most of her time currently is spent in the Fright Zone, working to help clear out any Horde presence in the area. She skips dinner to study many of the things that the Horde never taught her, histories and customs of Etheria that would never have been uttered in her childhood living situation. As much as Catra hates paperwork, she hates being unprepared even more.

(And besides, Catra likes seeing the look on everyone’s faces when she mentions something about Etheria that they don’t know themselves. It makes Princess meetings far more tolerable.)

So what if she doesn’t get much sleep, or she only eats about a meal per day? She’s doing fine! She’s certainly gone on much less.

There’s one day where everything seems like too much for Catra.

She snaps at Scorpia while they’re working on cleaning up Scorpia’s family castle. She doesn’t even really know what exactly the princess has done to piss her off, but Scorpia is on her nerves. She’s talking about a trip she took with Perfuma to visit Mermista in Salineas, and maybe it’s her voice or her unending optimism about everything, but Catra can’t listen to it anymore.

“So then Sea Hawk decided to burst out into this really cool shanty, but Mermista--”

“Scorpia,” Catra interrupts, grinding her teeth, “no offense, but I don’t really care, so could you just shut up for five minutes?”

The way that her best friend deflates immediately causes guilt to bubble up in Catra’s gut. She feels like she just got sucker punched.

“I… I’m sorry, Scorpia, I didn’t mean that. I’ve just been a little stressed out and want to get this done and I’m working on my anger but--”

Scorpia holds her pincers out in a placating manner. “Hey, Wildcat, it’s okay. I know you’ve been doing a lot recently. I don’t take it personally.”

Catra relaxes slightly, but her fur is still standing on end, and her tail is a bit poofy. She smooths her hair down, her claws digging slightly into her scalp.

“Thanks, Scorp. I’m going to work outside for a little while, get some fresh air, you know?”

The feline heads outside before Scorpia can properly respond, and she leans against the side of the decrepit castle. She takes a few deep breaths. Her body is tired, and a little voice in the back of her head tells her that she should go back to Brightmoon and rest.

But there are louder voices in her head, too. Voices that remind Catra that all of this destruction across Etheria is her fault. Voices that taunt her for her past, her mistakes.

She gets back to work, and she works hard enough and long enough that the blood pounding in her ears blocks out any sound at all.

A few mornings after she snapped at Scorpia, everyone is awkward around Catra at breakfast. The three other members of the Best Friend Squad share looks, like they know something she doesn’t. It pisses her off.

“What is it?” she finally asks, her fork clattering against her plate when she drops it. The others look at her, startled.

“What do you mean?” Glimmer asks. 

“What’s wrong? You guys are acting weird.”

“We aren’t acting weird!” Adora exclaims, her voice shaky. “Everything is good, we’re all good, right guys?” She’s never been very good at lying, especially to Catra.

Catra spots Glimmer and Bow rolling their eyes at the blonde’s poor acting skills. “You and I both know that’s bullshit, Adora.”

Glimmer sighs, putting on a nervous smile.

“We just… you’ve been working really hard recently, so we wanted to surprise you with a few days off! Castaspella said that you and Adora could go visit Mystacor and relax for a few days!”

“Yeah!” Bow agrees, clasping his hands together, “It’ll be so much fun! And Mystacor is really relaxing--”

“That’s really nice of you guys,” Catra says, eyeing each of them suspiciously, “but today Scorpia and I are supposed to work on clearing everything out of the old Horde barracks.”

Bow waves a hand dismissively. “I’m sure Scorpia can handle that by herself.”

“But it’ll go faster if both of us work on it together.”

“Then Perfuma can go over and help her!”

Catra takes a deep breath. “But I promised her I’d--”

Glimmer sighs in frustration. “Come on, Catra, just go on the stupid vacation! Everything will be fine if you aren’t here for a few days. Scorpia mentioned you seemed stressed and we thought maybe you needed a break.”

The feline seizes up for a brief moment. So that’s what this is about.

“I apologized to Scorpia for snapping at her already,” she says defensively. “She said she understood, and I’m fine. I just want to get everything done and then I’ll relax.”

Adora grabs Catra’s hand and squeezes it gently. “Catra, I really do think you deserve a break. You’ve been working so hard.”

I don’t deserve anything good, she thinks. She yanks her hand away from her girlfriend like the touch burns her, and the hurt look that gets sent her way forces her to glare at the wall.

“I…” she considers her words carefully. “I appreciate you guys being concerned, but seriously, I’m fine. I like the work. I promise.”

It feels like a punishment, the work. The aching muscles remind her that she’s trying to fix the pain she caused others. It pushes her to work harder.

“But Catra,” Adora begs, her voice cracking, “Please just--”

“I’m going to head out early,” Catra says, already heading towards the large doors that lead to one of the castle halls. She ignores the sympathetic looks Bow and Glimmer send her way. “I’ll get a head start in the Fright Zone, maybe even come back early when we’re done.”

She tries not to, but her body betrays her and she closes the doors behind her more aggressively than intended, leaving an uneaten breakfast and three concerned friends behind.

Catra doesn’t end up coming home early. In fact, she comes home far later than normal. Every time Scorpia tries to send her home, Catra comes up with another excuse to stay, or another quick task that she wants to finish so they don’t have to worry about it tomorrow. One task turns to two, then five, and it isn’t until around midnight that Scorpia says she’s heading to bed.

When Catra stumbles into her shared room with Adora, guilt and anger seize her. Why are they trying to stop her? She’s just fixing her own mess. Shouldn’t they be happy about that?

She doesn’t sleep much that night, but that’s okay, because she’s up just a few hours later. She skips breakfast and heads straight to the Fright Zone again, and Scorpia wakes up to see her hard at work, almost like she never left.

Catra operates this way for about a week. She barely sleeps, and she skips meals. Scorpia makes sure that she has a snack or two, and Catra takes quick naps in the beginning, but by the end of the week she can’t remember the last time she’s eaten a full meal or had more than an hour or two of sleep.

Her muscles ache constantly, and her body is running on empty, but she keeps working.In fact, Catra almost likes how her head is empty. Her thoughts are unusually quiet for once, and it allows her to work in a pained peace.

And as the Fright Zone becomes more and more homey, less like the Horde and more like Scorpia’s kingdom, Catra is happy. She’s fixing things.

Of course, it doesn’t last long.

She’s working contently one day when she hears whispering from outside the hall that leads into Scorpia’s throne. She ignores it, but the whispers grow louder and louder until they echo off the walls and forcibly draw her attention.

She turns as Glimmer, Adora, and Bow follow Scorpia into the room, murmuring amongst themselves. Catra turns her back towards them.

“Catra.” Her name sounds more like a sigh from Adora’s lips. “We’re worried about you.”

“Why?” she asks, and the question is genuine. She’s been working so well recently! Shouldn't they be proud of her?

The others glance at each other skeptically. “Uh, well, we haven’t seen you at all these past few days, not even at breakfast,” Bow says, his eyebrows knitting together.

“I’ve been getting up earlier,” she replies. She turns to face them, her hands gripping the wall next to her. She tries to play it off like she’s just leaning against it casually, but the others eye her with concern.

“You’re swaying on your feet, Catra,” Glimmer points out, and said feline straightens her shoulders. Her body screams in exhaustion.

“Yeah Wildcat,” Scorpia says, her voice tainted with worry, “we’re almost done here and I can finish up most of this stuff, so maybe you should go on back to Brightmoon and take a break--”

“I don’t need a break!” she snaps, taking a step forward. She immediately regrets it when she’s overcome with dizziness, one of her hands moving to cup her head.

Adora takes a step forward, but Catra holds a hand out to stop her. “Catra, when was the last time you slept for more than a few hours?” The only response she gets is a mumble. “What?”

“I said, ‘I don’t know.’”

“When was the last time you ate?” she questions further, and Catra’s grip on the wall weakens.

“I-I don’t know. A meal? That breakfast where I… yeah.”

“You mean the breakfast from a week ago?” Bow asks, incredulously, “When we were all together?”

Catra realizes she doesn’t have the strength to nod, so she just stands there. Her silence is confirmation enough.

“That’s it,” Adora states, her voice firm, “you’re coming back with us to Brightmoon and you’re going to rest and eat and then we’re going to talk about this.”

She wants to shake her head, scream ‘No!’ at the top of her lungs, but Adora is walking closer to her and everything is starting to become blurry, and Catra is realizing that all of her energy is absolutely, undeniably gone.

Glimmer’s eyebrows furrow. “Catra…?”

“I…” She can’t muster any other words, and suddenly the world is spinning and her legs are giving out from under her and she’s on the ground, cradled in her girlfriend’s arms.

She can barely hear them calling her name. She can only feel the blanket of exhaustion that engulfs her entirely, drawing her into a deep, deep sleep.