The Big Blue House

Draco woke up with drool on his face, a large book under his stomach, and his school robes covered in library dust.

"Wakey wakey!" Michael's face popped out from the side of the bunkbed.

"Ah! Salazar's sparkling bikini! You nearly gave me a heart attack!" Draco yells at him, wiping the drool off his face.

"Hahahah! You've got to teach me some of those really wizard swears someday, seriously. The worst I've ever heard being said was 'Merlin'." Draco scowled at him jokingly.

"C'mon guys, breakfast is in 15 minutes, the post will be here soon." Anthony told them, packing his things into his schoolbag. Draco jumped out of his bed and rushed to the mirror. He supposed he could keep what he had on, he didn't think it smelled too bad yet. His hair however...

"That's the best bed hair I've ever seen!" Michael pointed at him while laughing. Draco pouted and tried to smooth it down. There were locks of hair sticking up in ways Draco didn't know was possible. He put a hand through it and tried mussing it up. It looked better at least. It wasn't neat, but it wasn't terrible. It looked a bit too fluffy, so he went over to the en suite and took out his jar of hair gel. He got out a bit and flattened his blonde hair down. It wasn't completely stuck to his scalp, but it was managable. He exited the bathroom to put on his shoes.

After he was ready, him and the other boys headed down to the Great Hall.

They took their seats at the Ravenclaw table, all waiting for the post. Draco was nervous, but thought that if nothing had come yesterday, then his father probably wouldn't know about his housing situation until he fixed it. Once he had some free time away from the others, he would read the chapter he'd found in The Sorting Ceremony's Sanctity. He didn't want the others to know he wanted to switch houses yet. He didn't want to offend them. But he knew that he had to.

After ten minutes of idle discussion, owls began to fill the roof of the great hall. Hundreds of them swooping down to deliver to students, some simply dropping letters off before flying right back out, others stopping by the students to steal food and get petted.

Terry and Anthony both had owls go to them. Anthony received a letter from an owl that flew off as soon as it was delivered, while Terry got a small sack full of letters and a clingy owl that immediately stole a sausage off his plate.

At the group's questioning look, he explained. "My siblings and cousins prefer to write a letter each." Terry looked into the sack. Oh sweet! Sugar Quills, my favourite!" In that bag alone, Terry probably had double the amount of letters Draco would get from his father in his lifetime. At the thought of his father and letters, Draco quickly checked the air for any owls that looked like Pluto.

From the very back of the hall flew in an Eurasian eagle-owl. The sheer presence make Draco gulp. Suppose his father did find out. He foolishly tried to convince himself that it was just a letter from his mother, but in the owl's clutches was the unmistakable red of a Howler.

Pluto dropped the red envelope infront of Draco. Draco stared at it in horror. The owl landed harshly on the boy's shoulder and gently nibbled at his ear, as if knowing the danger the boy was in. After stealing a piece of toast off of his plate, the large owl flew off. Draco was still staring horrified at the red envelope.

"Father."

"Oh god, a Howler. That's rough buddy." Michael said unhelpfully. 'Rough' was an understatement. "You may as well open it, it's worse if you wait." The entire Ravenclaw table seemed to have quieted down to hear the Howler. Dracpo could hear some giggled and pity from the older years.

He reached out to the red envelope and opened the Malfoy seal.

"You have 30 seconds to get to a less populated area before my message plays." Lucius' commanding voice played out. Even in letter form, Draco could sense his anger being held back. The enveloped palyed a counter on it in black ink. Draco clutched the letter and sprinted out of the hall, leaving his breakfast behind.

He ran through the halls, racing in and out of students, trying to find a deserted area. He made it into a deserted and dusty Defence classroom and shut the door. He shakily rose his wand and set a weak silencing charm around the room, blocking any sound from making it out.

The envelope timer had reached 01 seconds.

"Well then, now that I hope you've made it to a more private area, let's talk Draco," Lucius' controlled voice echoed around the room. "I got the oddest letter from that disgusting half-breed 'Professor' Flitwick. Do you know what it said Draco?" Draco clenched his fists and kept his head down. The letter floated above him, talking down to him. "It said that you displayed a great show of magic. That you lifted a desk with 'Wingardium Leviosa' on the first try, instead of a feather. It said that the half-breed would like to personally tutor you in charms. To use your 'potential'. But you know what the most horrific thing that goblin told me?"
Draco nearly answered, but remembered that it was only a letter. His fists clenched tighter.

"That goblin told me that it was PROUD to have you in their HOUSE. In RAVENCLAW." Draco could hear the sneer in his father's voice. "Of course, at first I thought that he'd made an idiotic mistake. What with all the other nonsense it was spouting about your potential. You know as well as I do that your magic has always been pathetically weak for a Malfoy, especially with your lack of control. He acted like you charming a desk instead of a feather was something to be proud of! Are you so ruined that you can't even discern a table from a feather? Are you so ignorant that you'd embarrass your family in front of a class of potential allies?" Draco opened his mouth to reply again, but was cut off. "It's obviously rhetorical Draco, this is a letter." Draco shut his mouth and flushed with shame at the loathing in his father's voice.

"So I asked Professor Snape about your progress in Slytherin, and do you know what he said?" Draco clenched his fists tighter. "He said that you weren't in his house. That you were in RAVENCLAW." His father's voice boomed. This entire time the Howler hadn't howled as much as it talked to him. Dracos suspected this was going to stop very soon. "DO YOU HAVE ANY KNOWLEDGE TO WHAT THIS MEANS FOR US DRACO?! IT MEANS A LINEAGE THAT HAS LASTED HUNDREDS AND HUNDREDS OF YEARS, SINCE HOGWARTS FIRST BEGAN, IS BROKEN! BECAUSE OF YOUR REPULSIVE LOVE OF BOOKS. I ALWAYS KNEW I SHOULD HAVE STOPPED YOUR BLATHERING ABOUT BOOKS WHEN IT BEGAN! I WAS TOO LENIENT WITH YOU! I SHOULD HAVE BEAT IT OUT OF YOU WHEN YOU HAD THE CHANCE!" The calm was gone. The control was gone. Everything was gone. Draco could practically feel the books slamming onto his head. "BUT NOW YOU'VE DISHONOURED YOUR FAMILY, HAVE DISSAPOINTED YOUR ANCESTORS AND HAVE DISOBEYED ME! YOU HAVE EVEN DISHONOURED SALAZAR SLYTHERIN HIMSELF! THE MAFLOY FAMILY HAS ALWAYS BEEN IN SLYTHERIN, THEY HAVE BEEN CUNNING, THEY HAVE BEEN AMBITIOUS, THEY HAVE BEEN SHREWD, ACHIEVMENT ORIENTED AND ESPECIALLY STRONG LEADERS! AND NOW I KNOW THAT YOU ARE NONE OF THOSE THINGS!" Draco's eyes welled up. He was nothing, he'd done everything wrong, he was a failure, he was a Ravenclaw, he wasn't a Malfoy, he was nothing-

"Draco." The letter said in quieter tone, snapping Draco back to attention with the whiplash. "I want you to know how lucky you are. If we had another child, if we had another heir, you would be disowned. If Narcissa wasn't in her state right now, we would have another child, and you'd be living in muggle London on the side of the road with nothing. So count your luck. Trust a boy like you to gain something from your mother's pain." Draco flinched harshly at the repulsion in his voice. "You are just like the traitors from the Black family. I suppose it's good that you're a Ravenclaw instead of a Hufflepuff or a...ugh, Gryffindor. It's shame you took after those in the Black family instead of your Aunt Bella." Draco shivered at the nickname Aunt Bella. His 'Aunt Bella' had been the Dark Lord's right hand, and had gotten pleasure from torturing people.

"You shall keep up with your studies, be the best flyer in your year, the top of your class. You shall continue studying your languages and dark magic. There is still time to save you and put you onto a better path than this. Make powerful allies, stay away from Mudbloods, and write to your mother regularly. She has been...unmanageable since you left." His voice softened when he mentioned his wife. "Take the tutoring lessons in charms. Even if it is done by a half-breed, you do need to improve drastically. Oh, and Draco?" Draco rubbed at his teary eyes with the back of his hand. "The only reason you'll be allowed back to the manor come the holidays is for your mother's sake. If she does need you however, you will stay at Hogwarts and receive no gifts. Don't disappoint me again, or there will be consequences. One step out of line and you are off to Mahoutokoro School of Magic until Seventh year." Draco flinched again. He made a mental note to pick up a bit of Japanese. Just in case.

"Remember Draco, you are a Malfoy. Act like it." The letter burst into flames and dropped to the floor in a pile of dust.

Draco was shaking. His hands were shaking. He clenched and unclenched his fists but it didn't help. He was still shaking.

He felt lightheaded and heavy at the same time. Every word had hit it. His brain felt like a hailstorm, words like pebbles of rain racing around his mind, battering against the walls of his head. He faintly heard someone knocking at the door of the classroom but he didn't care. He couldn't breath.

The tears he'd rubbed away were streaming down his cheeks silently. His breath was beginning to grow laboured. He was nothing to his father. He'd disappointed everyone. His father thought he deserved to be beaten. He did. Why did he have to like books? It should have been beaten out of him when he was younger. He was ruined forever.

He fell onto his knees. In the middle of the room. He felt small, like a speck of dust, ready to be blown away. He heard the door open up through the ringing in his ears, but all he could do was let out a sob. The tears kept welling up and falling, weighing heavier on his cheeks. He curled into a ball and wept, gripping tight, digging his nails into his legs. He bent his head into his knees and sobbed, the floodgates opening.

He was WORTHLESS. He was NOTHING. He was STUPID and IGNORANT and DISAPPOINTING and DISRESPECTFUL and REPULSIVE. He was lucky to be born a Malfoy, but none of that matters now. He was a RAVENCLAW. It hadn't quite sunk in yet, but with his face tucked into his knees and a ringing in his ears, he felt hopeless. Even if he could swap houses, the damage was done. His father still wouldn't love him. He just wanted to make him proud.

And now he never would.

A great sob wretched itself from his throat. Sets of footsteps pattered around him and he felt arms reach round his back and hug him. He tensed up. Was he going to be strangled? Choked? He ripped himself out of the grip and spun round on the floor to face them.

He saw Terry and Anthony and Michael. He saw Hermione and Neville. He saw Harry. He saw pity.

The gathered around him again.

"Hey, hey Draco, it's okay, you're okay, everything's fine." Someone's voice told him. He felt ill. There were too many people. He couldn't breath.

"Can't...c-can't...can't breath...can't breath." He stuttered out through tears, beginning to panic as his throat closed up on him.

"Give him some space!" The same voice yelled out and everyone moved back a meter. He clenched his nails into his legs tighter, digging into the trousers to the skin.

A set of hands gripped his, and pulled them from his legs. If you looked closely you could make out little holes dug into the fabric of his trousers. One of his legs was probably bleeding. The set of hands were soft as they cupped his and stroked them. His tears kept falling and his face crumpled again. It was such a strange gesture, but it was comforting. It was soft. He let out another sob. He could live forever as long as he had this. He wasn't used to it, but he wished he was.

"Okay guys, let's just go to class early. If they're late just tell your teacher Draco got a...what do you call it, howl-thing? Say he'll be late for class. Neville and I will handle Harry. Leave them be." The same voice told the group. The set of hands round his gripped on slightly tighter.

There was a pitter pattering of feet and the sound of a door opening and closing. Draco kept his face in his knees, his hands outstretched before him.

He twisted his hands round in the other's grip and entertwined their fingers. The other person squeezed his hands.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Harry's voice asked. Draco peeked over his legs and shook his head. Harry smiled awkwardly. "Okay then, that's cool. Can I ask a couple of questions, though? Just yes or no ones, so you can nod or shake your head, no speaking needed." Draco hesitantly gave a nod.

"Okay then, uh, cool. So...um...first question; was that letter from your dad?" Harry asked. Draco gave a shaky nod, his knees tucking in tighter. "Oh then, okay...why was he mad?" Draco stared at him. "Sorry! Yes and no questions only, uh...did you do something bad?" He asked awkwardly. Draco nodded somberly. "What did you- right! Yes and no question, yes and no question...did you do something bad in class?" Draco thought about the desk incident. He nodded. "Huh. What did you do? Oh damn it, sorry, I keep on forgetting about the yes and no thing, um..."

"This isn't getting us anywhere." Draco croaked out. Harry snapped his head to Draco at the unexpected sound. "I'll just tell you why he sent me a Howler." He wiped at his face and cleared his throat. Harry scooted closer. He absentmindedly unclasped their hands and laid his on his knees. "The reason he was so mad at me is because...I'm in Ravenclaw."

"Huh?" Harry asked, cocking his head. "Isn't Ravenclaw the smart house? Why would he be mad?"

"It's because every single Malfoy since the beginning of Hogwarts was in Slytherin. All of my ancestors. My lineage is based upon being a Slytherin. And being rich. The Black family on Mother's side was also completely compiled of Slytherins, my cousin Sirius. They were disowned and burned from the family portrait. He's now in Azkaban." At Harry's confused look he elaborated. "The highest security wizarding prison in Britain. People have been disowned for less. It's considered disrespectful and traitorous to differ. I'm lucky to be here." He wiped at his eyes with his arm.

"Just because of a Hogwarts house? That's crazy!"

"Father was angry. I'm lucky I don't have a sibling or another heir, or I'd be on the street. They would have another heir but Mother is- she's...she's not well." He cut himself off. Harry scooched next to him.

"Do you mind if I ask what's going on with your mum? I mean- obviously I don't believe what Ron said on the train, but I saw her in Diagon Alley and it just...it looked more like you were the parent." Harry looked at him imploringly, begging him to answer.

Draco sighed.

"About...5? Years ago, when I was 7, someone broke into the Manor. They managed to force their way through the wards and into the house. The Aurors only said that they were a woman they were about to send to Azkaban, and that they were keeping in a holding cell. I was too young for them to tell me what crimes she'd committed, so all I knew was that she was a 'very bad woman'" He used quotation marks, rolling his eyes. "Once she was in the house, she'd made it into one of the master bedrooms, where Mother was sleeping. I heard a scream. I raced to where I had heard it and saw this crazy woman standing over my mum with a wand out-" his voice broke, "and I panicked. I performed my strongest bout of accidental magic. Apparently I'd managed to wandlessly perform a Bodybind hex on the woman, and had broken three of her bones." He smiled sadly. "But it was too late. She'd cursed Mother. By the time the Aurors came she was let out of a Bodybind hex. She Avada Kedavra-ed herself right then and there. The Aurors took my family in for questioning, but Mother was acting odd. She was screaming every time she saw someone new, she was talking to herself, she was extremely attached to me, had a poor memory, and was, inherently, acting like a child. They took her to St Mungos Psyche ward for 3 months, but it didn't really help. They just smoothed her out." He frowned.

"That's awful."

Draco nodded. "Father was angrier than ever and the Manor was quieter than ever. I just focused on my books. And look how much luck that did me." He added bitterly.

"I'm so sorry."

"And you want to know the worst part?!" Draco jumped to his feet, shocking Harry. He nodded dumbly. "The worst part is the mystery! Most people think a mystery makes something interesting, or that it adds more layers to a story, and you think with a story like that you wouldn't want to know, but you would! And you do! I want to know who that woman was, what she did to end up nearly going to Azkaban, why she did what she did! And I'll never get to know unless the Aurors are suddenly allowed to share their top secret case files with children! But I think I deserve to know!" He exclaimed indignantly, gesturing wildly with his arms. "But no, I have to just call her 'the woman'. And I have to deal with the fact that she'll never be held accountable! Because she killed herself in front of me before I could ever know. And now I'll never. Never know. I've looked up everything in the library! The closest thing I can think of is Schizotypal Personality Disorder, but it doesn't quite check out, and there's no curse for it." He stopped his rage to think. "Now I'm realising how insensitive I'm being to you, as if you don't know how it feels, but both of your parents kind of died...sorry..." He finished awkwardly, rubbing his arm.

"Don't compare your pain. I mean, my parents did die, but at least the person who did it got defeated...by me? I guess? And at least I know why he did it. Light vs Dark. I agree that not knowing would be terrible."

"It is!"

They looked at each other. Then they started laughing.

"We are pretty messed up."

"Yeah, we are."

"The Messed Up Group."

"Terrible band name."

A comfortable silence. Harry stood up with Draco and grabbed two bags.

"Here's your bag," He handed him one. Draco smiled.

"Thanks."

More silence.

"Well I should probably get to class. I have Potions with Snape first thing." Draco fake gagged.

"I think I have that later!"

"Unlucky you."

"Yeah, we'd better get to class...I'll see you later?"

"Yeah, definitely. In the library."

. . .

"What are you doing?"

"Oh, um, I saw my cousin Dudley doing it, I think it's called a high five."

"What do I do?"

"I think you just...slap it?"

"Huh."

Draco reached over with an open palm and softly pat Harry's hand.

"Like that?"

"Sure!"

They exited the room together and took separate paths. They waved goodbye to each other.

Things weren't okay. Things were far from okay. Things were never okay, and Draco wondered when he'd get used to that.

But things were a bit better. They were fine.

The school day was okay. The friends were okay. Studying in the library was fun. But it still felt a bit bleak, covered in a layer of grey from Lucius' letter.

But then Draco looked at Harry and saw him mouth 'The Messed Up Group' and things seemed a little less grey.

They were manageable.

And that was okay.

That was fine.