Chapter three
Crystal kept her head down, her hair falling in front of her face shielding her puffy eyes and wet cheeks from the world. There was joyous chatter coming from the dining room, which immediately died out when she stepped foot inside. She didn’t need to look up to know that all eyes were on her.
She grabbed her pre-made plate waiting for her on the counter and sat on the far end of the table, away from the other girls.
The room didn’t lighten up for the remainder of the meal, the only noise was whispering and the occasional whimper from Crystal.
***
Crystal loved pink, she really did, but looking at her room and wardrobe for the next two months of her life she was starting to regret that claim.
Pink dresses, pink skirts, pink blouses, pink socks, even pink hair ties; Madame was adamant with their gender roles and pink was the first step. But Crystal couldn’t help but wonder why she bothered to pack her own clothes if she wasn't to wear them?
She took the only bed left unclaimed, the one on the far right, the one against the wall connected to the hallway and closest to the bathroom. A tear rolled down her cheek as she slammed her undergarments drawer shut. The crying hadn’t completely stopped since group therapy, Crystal’s head was beginning to throb at this point.
“Congrats on passing the first-step, Curls”
Crystal jumped out of her skin at the sudden sound. Gigi smirked at her from the doorway, blowing her gum into a bubble the size of her fist then let it pop. Crystal muttered a small ‘Thanks’, refusing to make eye contact with the girl. Gigi strutted over to the bed parallel to hers and flopped down onto it. Crystal resumed folding her new clothes, she felt Gigi’s eyes on her the entire time.
“You’ve been giggling and skipping around all morning, Little Miss Chatterbox, and now you won’t so much as to smile?”
Crystal’s head snapped up at where Gigi laid on her back, facing the ceiling, twirling strands of her hair with her index. She stared at the girl in disbelief for what she just said. It was a ridiculous thing to say; Crystal could name a thousand and one reason to not be smiling right now and one of them laid on the bed in front of her.
“Well it’s not like I have a reason to smile at the moment” Crystal mumbled under her breath, not caring whether Gigi heard her or not. She wanted nothing more than to be left alone at that moment.
“What? Miss ‘let’s all sit in a circle, hold hands and sing kumbaya until we’re all happy and hetero’ can’t find a reason to fucking smile?” Gigi sat up to lean on her elbows, giving Crystal a condescending smirk.
Crystal knew Gigi was just teasing her, trying to piss her off. She should’ve known better, should’ve calmed herself down but she couldn’t help it. Her blood boiled beneath her skin, she couldn’t explain it but something about that girl irritated her like no one has before. Crystal had always considered herself a person who could get along with anyone, not once had someone made her want to claw at her own eyes and rip her hair out, she’s never even yelled at a person.
But then one loud pop from Gigi’s gum set her off for a reason she couldn’t really explain.
“I’m so fucking sorry that I’m a little upset after the worst thing that could’ve happened to me just happened!”
Gigi stared at her with an expression somewhere between irritated and impressed. Impressed that Crystal had the guts to explode like that (which she typically did not; she didn’t even like to curse). Irritated with her dramatics.
“Really? Finding out you’re a fucking dyke is the worse thing you can think of? Fuck, what I’d do to have your problems” Gigi rolled her eyes and Crystal's heart broke. She didn't understand how Gigi could just scoff at her pain like that.
“Why are you like this?” More tears threatened to escape from the corners of her eyes, “Why are you treating me this way? Can’t you show a little compassion-“
“To the girl who’s been bawlingher ass off for the past two hours after finding out a trivial thing we all already knew?” Gigi sat up with her legs swung over the side, sneering down at the whimpering girl, “News flash Sweetheart, we’re all homos here, you aren’t special!” She had a wicked grin, and if Crystal had an ounce more bravery or any energy left, she would’ve slapped it right off her face. Instead her lip trembled and more tears rolled down her cheeks.
She buried her face in her hands and brought her knees to her chest. Gigi’s smile fell, she knew she crossed a line but her pride was far too strong to do anything about it but flee.
Crystal heard the stomping of her boots as Gigi rushed out of the room. Leaving Crystal alone yet again, something that left an emptiness in her chest. She decided that maybe she didn’t really want to be alone.
***
The other girls were long fast asleep, Jackie’s snores that were audible from across the room, Jaida’s constant tossing and turning, and a loud thump coming from Rock’s corner that could’ve very well been the girl falling out of bed, were all making it very difficult for a light sleeper to fall asleep.
Crystal laid on her left side, eyes closed but still awake. She was just about to fall asleep when she heard a short lived buzzing noise coming from the bed beside hers. She stayed still for a moment, waiting for the noise to repeat, and then attempting sleep again when she didn’t hear it.
No more than a few seconds later, the noise came back. This time the buzzes were more frequent with the silence between them replaced with soft moans.
After a few moments, Crystal became concerned. She sat up in her bed, there was a blinking red light coming from under the covers of the bed to her left, Nicky's. She threw the blanket off of her legs and tiptoed to the other bed.
"Hey, are you okay?" She whispered and tapped the blonde's shoulder.
Nicky threw the blanket off her head, panic in her eyes until she saw who it was, "Jesus, you scared the shit out of me"
"Sorry," Crystal muttered sheepishly, "What are you doing?"
"AV, chére"
"What's that?"
"Aversion Therapy"
"I'm still not following-"
Nicky took her hand out of the covers, she held a small wand-like objet, almost like a cordless hair-curler, "When you think about girls a little too long, you use this-"
She pressed a button and the end lit up in red and made the buzzing noise, "And you shock yourself so that every time you have those thoughts you feel that pain"
Crystal's eyes widened in shock, she covered her mouth, "That's sick!"
Nicky shrugged, "It is, but no pain no gain. Tu veux laisser tomber les filles? Then you're going to have to start training yourself"
Crystal's brows furrowed, "We're not dogs!"
Nicky fell back into her bed, facing the ceiling, "According to them, we might as well be"
Crystal didn't have time to ask anymore questions, when the door creaked open and a flashlight was shown in her face. Her face crinkled up and she raised her hands to shield her eyes.
"Get to bed, Crystal" Madame spoke at a normal volume, not caring that there were people sleeping in the room, "You'll need your rest for tomorrow"
“Sorry Madame, I was just-“ Crystal scrambled to stand up from her position on her knees.
Madame held up her hand to silence the brunette, “It doesn’t matter, just go to sleep”
Crystal nodded and settled herself into bed once more. She watched Madame walked through the room, shining the flashlight at each bed before turning on her heel and walking back out into the hallway.
Crystal played with the small satin ribbon on the front of her nightgown as her eyes fluttered shut.