Ships as Vines & Shorts
Stephen: Alright I'm going to need you to take off your pants.
Tony: But I'm in for an ankle injury.
Stephen: I know.
*Music starts playing*
Steve: You are all being ridiculous! Bucky doesn't have a crush on me.
Tony: Yes he does.
Clint: Yes he does.
Natasha: Yes he does
Bucky: Yes I do.
*Peter and Wade on a blanket. Staring at the stars.*
Wade: I just like to look up at the stars and wonder what it all means huh.
Peter: "You got that right"
*Written in the sky* 'Wanna make out?'
Wanda: Help!
Vision: Never fear for I-
Natasha: I got this.
*Natasha knocks out Ultron*
Wanda: Oh!
*Natasha picks up Wanda bridal style. Carrying her into the sunset.*
Vision: That's sweet.
Ultron: That's beautiful.
Bucky: *staring at his phone*
Bucky: Peter, I have a question
Peter: Yes Mr. Bucky?
Bucky: What does thicc' mean? It has two c's.
Peter: Uh, well, i-it kind of means, uh, like. I guess it kind of means you have a nice butt.
Bucky:
Peter:
Bucky: *stares at his phone and whispers* What the fuck Clint?
Sam: Steve is that a hickey?
Steve: *blushes* No... I fell.
Sam: On someone's lips.
Bucky: *On the other side of the room, smirking.*
Wade: Is it still raining?
Colossus: Yeah come check it out.
Ellie: Are they holding hands?
Yukio: Yeah
Interviewer: Mr. Stark, What would you say about the rumor's claiming you are gay?
Tony: I'd say that is absolute slander and I'm going to have to sue whoever said that. I'm Bi and I enjoy taking it up the ass from both men and women. I'm an equal opportunity bottom.
*interviewers jaw drops*
Tony: Just because I'm currently getting it from Bruce Banner. Doesn't erase the fact that I got it from Ms. Potts. Don't erase my sexuality!
Tony to Pepper: You are my number one. I love you the most. More than anyone Strange-
Tony *Pushes Pepper away, and hugs Stephen*
Tony: Stephen your my number one.
Pietro: Fuck you!
Clint: Is that an insult or a to-do list?
Sam: *wakes up*
Bucky: Good morning
Sam: Ah what happened last night. Did we-
Bucky: Nah I just got here. You left your door unlocked.
Sam: Whaa?
Sam: I love you.
Scott: Love you two.
*The two kiss*
*Loud Crash*
*Clint falls through the glass table*
Sam: Clint were you on the fucking ceiling?
*Clint groans and gets up. Then runs out of the room. Waving his phone back and forth.*
Clint: "YOU FUCKERS OWE ME TWENTY BUCKS."
Tony: How is your fever?
Bucky: What fever?
Tony: Oh nevermind. You just looked hot to me.
Rhodey: We're not going to make it.
Tony: You promised me well cuddle when we make it back alive.
Tony: *Runs off screaming*
Rhodey: What?
Loki: I want you to look at me straight in the eyes.
Tony: You can't have me look at those beautiful eyes and expect me to be straight.
Thor: Hey girl. Why don't you get that fat ass over here?
Valkyrie: Excuse me?
Bruce: He's talking to me.
Thor: Who's that?
Bruce: Some thirsty bitch.